A/N: Written for #DarveyValentine.

Prompt by Patricia (darveycanon): "After 7x16. Machel invites Darvey to a spa to celebrate their wedding before they leave for Seattle. Banter and hot tub kisses and action." Your wish is my command :) I hope you enjoy!

You And I Collide - Part 1

Through a tiny slit in the curtains, the morning sun is peeking into the luxurious honeymoon suite. A quiet groan breaks the early peace as the woman in bed stretches and twists, finding her husband already staring at her with the brightest of smiles.

"Good morning, Mrs. Ross," Mike murmurs, his voice still hoarse from sleep.

"Good morning, Mr. Ross," Rachel whispers, her face lighting up with the realization of what they had done the night before. As if to reassure herself, she brings up her hand and stares in wonder at the wedding band that's sparkling on her finger. "So, it wasn't a dream?"

"It definitely wasn't a dream," Mike chuckles, the sound dying away mere seconds later as he leans in to kiss his wife.

It feels so entirely new to be able to kiss as husband and wife, while at the same time it's as comfy and familiar as coming home. With serene expressions on their faces, they break apart moments later; Rachel gently pressing Mike back into the pillow so she could snuggle into his warm embrace. The sheets rustle as Rachel gets comfortable, inching back and forth, shifting his arm a few inches down on her waist, until they are finally the perfect fit.

There is a peaceful silence hovering in the air, while Rachel relishes in the feeling of Mike's finger drawing soothing circles on her skin. At this very moment, everything feels perfect and Rachel wishes she could just stop time so they could stay in it forever. As she lies there, all the warm and happy memories of their ceremony and celebration come rushing back. Her husband's love-filled eyes as she walked down the aisle, his romantic vows that had accelerated her heart like nothing ever had before, the excited and affectionate atmosphere in the room throughout the whole night, the delicious food, the lyrical music, the incessant dancing. Her husband's content expression as they shared their first waltz to their favorite song. Her mom and dad, seemingly as happy and in love as if they'd just gotten together, while he swirled her over the dance floor. Louis and Sheila, glued together the entire night and for once being and appearing so perfectly normal. And Donna and Harvey. Being… Donna and Harvey. Their energy as intense and intimate as only theirs could ever be, but both so foolishly oblivious to the truth everyone else could see.

"You think Donna and Harvey will ever get their shit together?" Rachel muses, her portentous question in stark contrast to the otherwise relaxed morning vibes.

It takes Mike a second to catch up; Rachel's warm body pressing into his side having almost been enough to lure him back into a peaceful slumber. "What?" He asks, momentarily bewildered by the sudden sound.

"Donna and Harvey," Rachel repeats, patting her fingers against his chest to get his full attention. "Do you think they'll ever realize how stupid they are?"

Her question triggers another hearty chuckle. "I doubt it. I don't know what else has to happen for them to finally open their eyes," Mike replies, shrugging his shoulder. As he tries to relax again, he can feel the tension taking hold of the woman in his arms and he instantly braces himself for what he knows would follow next.

"I'd feel so much better leaving them behind if I just knew they'd be with each other," Rachel sighs exasperatedly and Mike is already inwardly shaking his head at the tone in her voice.

"I know, me too," he agrees, squeezing her waist gently.

After only a second of hesitation, Rachel continues to speak.

"So… I was thinking…"

"Uh-huh," Mike murmurs cautiously, knowing that whatever comes next would probably be a bad idea while also knowing that there would be no way he could ever object.

"I was thinking," Rachel repeats, mischievousness already sneaking into her tone, "that since we decided to postpone our honeymoon until after we've moved to Seattle and got settled in… you know… we could maybe… go to a spa before we leave? For a long weekend? With Donna and Harvey? Make it a little farewell party, just the four of us?"

"A little farewell party, huh?" Mike replies, the shaking of his head becoming more visible now.

"And a little matchmaking party?" Rachel adds sheepishly, twisting her head so she could look at Mike.

"That sounds more like it," Mike laughs.

"So, what do you say?"

"To a spa? I say hell yes! But why would you ever think that that would help Donna and Harvey?"

"Please. Three or four days in a secluded area with not much to do than getting massages, hanging out in saunas and relaxing by the pool?" Rachel replies suggestively and with a knowing smile.

"They've already seen each other naked. And yet, here we still are."

"That was years ago. It's different now. They are different now. You'll see."

Mike studies his wife for a moment; the determined expression on her face telling him that there is no use in contradicting her. And it's not like he wouldn't also feel better about leaving his mentor and best friend knowing that he was truly happy. The kind of happy he had seen him emanating the night before, while holding Donna in his arms.

Maybe things really are different now.

And he figures that it wouldn't hurt to try.

"Alright. Then let's do it."

"Wonderful," Rachel squeals excitedly, already beginning to pull away from Mike. "I'll get started with the planning right away."

"Wait, wait, wait," Mike stops her, his voice dropping and his arms tightening. "It's our first morning as husband and wife," he reminds her, re-closing the distance Rachel had begun to put between them by grinding his whole length against her. "And I won't let you out of this bed for at least another hour or two," he explains, his voice dropping another octave.

And just like that, all thoughts of Donna and Harvey and life and anything really are gone, as they lose themselves in each other and the blinding happiness they feel.

~o~o~

It's been five days since the wedding and Harvey can still feel her hair tickling his ear and her intoxicating scent is still in his nose. His arms are yearning to hold her again; the emptiness he's been feeling since that night making it hard to concentrate on anything but her.

Walking down that aisle with her by his side had already messed with his head way more than he'd care to admit, but dancing with her all through the night, that is something he has an even harder time letting go of. Touching her, feeling her, smelling her. All of his senses had been purely focused on her and on the way she had felt in his embrace. On the way she had made him feel while being in his embrace.

As Harvey watches the growing darkness creeping through the street canyons of Manhattan, an all too familiar aching settles in his heart. He's self-aware enough now to know what it means; to acknowledge what it has always meant. It's why the voice in his head is even more painful than it's ever been before.

'I didn't feel anything when I kissed you.'

With a heavy sigh, Harvey turns around; in no way mentally stable enough to deal with the onslaught of emotions after a rough day at the firm. His eyes drift through his new old office, but not even the fact that he had handed over the reins to Robert the day before could keep his mind focused long enough not to miss her.

Just when he has made the decision to walk over to his decanter of Macallan, heavy footfalls echoing down the hall catch Harvey's attention. And sure enough, only mere moments later, Mike appears in his field of vision; swiftly striding down the darkened hallway.

"I haven't even really left yet, and you've robbed me of my office already," Mike deadpans, crossing his arms in front of his body.

Harvey raises an eyebrow, the expression hiding the surprise upon seeing Mike back at the firm. And in a manner in which he's never seen his protégé in the office before. A blue sweater is clinging to his upper body, while a pair of jeans is covering the lower half of him. It feels weird seeing him here like this, all casual; and another wave of finality hits Harvey.

"You can thank your father-in-law," Harvey states dryly, walking further back into the room and leaning himself against his desk as he eyes his friend expectantly. "What are you doing here, Mike? Aren't you supposed to be packing your things?"

"We're already finished," Mike replies with a confident smile, walking further into the room. "The movers will come tomorrow and get started."

"That's quick," Harvey notes, wishing for that drink now after all.

"Yeah. We're expected in Seattle at the beginning of next week," Mike explains, coming to a halt in front of Harvey. "And you, my friend, need to go home now and pack as well."

Momentary confusion flashes over Harvey's face, contorting his forehead.

"Pack what exactly?" He asks after a few seconds, when Mike doesn't seem to want to explain.

"Your bag. Because we are going to Lake Placid tomorrow for a little farewell party," Mike retorts matter-of-factly.

"Who is doing what now?" Harvey asks again, his brain still not able to catch up with what Mike is saying.

"Rachel, Donna, you and I are going to a spa resort up at Lake Placid for the weekend. We're leaving tomorrow at 7 am."

"You're kidding, right?"

"Do I look like I'm kidding?"

Mike stands stoically, staring at his former boss with an unwavering spark in his eyes.

"Mike, Robert took over the firm from me yesterday. How will it look if I leave the ship a day after that?" Harvey replies with audible tension in his voice. Going away with Donna? For a weekend? That's one of the worst ideas he's ever heard.

"Like you're taking a well-deserved break?"

"I can't just go on vacation like that. And Donna can't either. Half of the management would be gone. Robert and Louis will never allow it," Harvey responds agitatedly.

"They will," Mike murmurs, with an impish smile.

"What was that?"

"I said 'they will'. And with that, I mean, they already did."

"They already did," Harvey repeats incredulously, as his mind is already drifting to the upcoming days. Lake Placid. Donna. Spa. Donna. Nature. Donna. Sauna. Don-.

"They said it's totally fine, that they understand and that they wish you and Donna a wonderful and relaxing time."

Harvey stares at Mike in disbelief and as much as he wants and tries to come up with reasons to get out of this whole thing, there is the one reason that makes all others null and void.

"Does Donna already know?"

"Rachel is with her right now. They're probably halfway done packing, while we are still here, discussing it."

"She hasn't said 'no'?" Harvey asks, for whatever reason feeling the need to reassure himself that she would be okay with it as well.

"Harvey. Rachel has found one of the most amazing spa resorts in the country. Do you really think Donna would say 'no' to that?"

"No," Harvey muses, "she wouldn't," he concurs with a nod. Then, after looking at Mike for another moment in silence, he sighs and stands up straight. He knows he wouldn't be able to get out of it without either having to lie or tell the truth. And deep inside, he also knows that he doesn't even really want to get out of it. "Alright. I guess I'll go home to pack then."

"Wonderful," Mike cheers excitedly. "Do you need a hand?"

"No, thanks, Mike. I think I can pack my own bag," Harvey shoots back before he walks over to his desk and begins to clear it out.

Mike is about to leave but turns around one more time when he reaches the door.

"Pick-up is at 7 am," he reminds Harvey.

"I know."

"And don't forget to pack your trunks."

And with a suggestive wink of his eye, Mike spins around and leaves a speechless Harvey behind.

~o~o~

"And Harvey is really okay with this?" Donna asks astounded.

As a reply, Rachel looks down at the cellphone in her hand, whose screen is still empty. "Mike hasn't sent an emergency message, so I think we're good to go."

"Huh," Donna just replies, her thoughts immediately drifting off again, as she pulls out one of her lacy nightgowns from the chest of drawers by the wall.

"Huh what?" Rachel wants to know, looking at Donna who is standing at the other end of the room. She'd miss this; the quiet evenings with her best friend, drinking wine and sharing stories. It would never be like this again and the thought is making her heart sting for a second. Which is just one more reason why this weekend trip simply had to take place. Because they needed a proper goodbye.

That is, after she and Mike would successfully have played cupid for Donna and Harvey.

"I just never thought anyone could ever convince Harvey to go on a spa trip. We all know he's not really the type," Donna explains, shrugging her shoulders and throwing the nightwear onto her bed right next to where her friend is sitting.

"Hmm…" Rachel muses. "I think he's changed though. So maybe he'll enjoy it just fine."

"Yeah. It'll be interesting to see, that's for sure," Donna chuckles but deep inside of her, a nervous hum is oscillating every single nerve ending in her body.

The two women fall quiet for a moment; Donna already rummaging through another drawer, while Rachel contemplates asking the question that's burning on the tip of her tongue. Taking another sip from the glass in her hands, she fumbles for the right words before they slide from her lips.

"Will you be okay with all of this though?"

Even with Donna's back to Rachel, the younger one can see the tension shooting through Donna's frame.

"What do you mean?" she asks, turning around slowly to stare at Rachel.

"You know what I mean… I saw the way you looked at him during the wedding. And I saw the look on your face when you two danced," Rachel explains knowingly. "So… I just wanna make sure you will be okay being this close to him for a prolonged weekend."

"Shouldn't you have asked me that before you practically hijacked Harvey and me?"

Rachel studies Donna, seeing the serious expression on her face but also the softer one in her eyes. "We just thought it'd be nice to have some undisturbed days, just the four of us… I didn't really think any further than that." Rachel replies with a half-truth.

Donna is too unsettled to detect the ambiguity, so she nods quietly instead; a slow smile spreading on her lips. "It is a wonderful idea, Rachel, and I'm happy and grateful for the invitation," Donna reassures her. "And don't worry about me. Harvey and I are back to being normal. So, of course, we'll be totally okay going on this trip together."

"Good," Rachel replies relieved while taking another sip from the red wine.

"Good," Donna agrees, shifting her attention back to packing her bag.

She only needed a couple more things now and then she'd be good to go on this trip she knows is a bad idea but can't get out of even if she wanted to. Which deep down she knows she doesn't.

~o~o~

The nervous hum that had been simmering inside of Donna since Rachel had told her about the trip, swells in intensity the next morning when the bell rings. Slipping into her plushy coat and grabbing her suitcase and bag, she heads out of the door, only to almost run over Harvey in the process.

"Good morning," he chuckles at the surprised look on her face.

"Harvey, good morning," she breathes, swallowing past the cough that's stuck in her throat.

"I thought I'd come up and give you a hand with your stuff," Harvey replies to the wordless question in Donna's eyes, pointing at her suitcase.

"Oh. Right. Thank you, that's very kind of you," Donna replies, rolling the red case in Harvey's direction.

Their fingers brush as he reaches for the handle, and instantaneously and simultaneously a bolt of lightning shoots down their spines. Heated eyes meet in an intense gaze, as their bodies tingle in recognition of what they desire.

Before they can get lost in the moment, Donna smiles tentatively at him and breaks the eye-contact by turning around to lock her door. Taking another second to inhale inconspicuously, Donna then faces Harvey again and both of them make their way down to join Mike and Rachel.

The drive up to Lake Placid is quiet and uneventful; at least for the newly-weds who are steering the car. Donna and Harvey, however, being in such close proximity, have already asked themselves a dozen times if they had made the right choice to come by the time they leave the civilization of the metropolis behind.

For a while, Harvey forces his attention on his cellphone, where he first skims his work-related emails and then moves on to the news. Every now and then, he's imagining feeling Donna's eyes on him, but every time it happens he's too afraid to look up and find out. Too afraid of the disappointment he'd feel when finding out that it had indeed been only his imagination, and also too afraid of the hope that would flicker in his chest if it hadn't.

Donna at the same time has a hard time not staring at Harvey, whose whole appearance seems to be more magnetic than rarely before. In the thirteen years they've known each other, she could still count the times she's seen him in casual clothes with the fingers of both hands. And just how much his expensive suits serve as a type of armor becomes overwhelmingly apparent when Donna sees him outside of them, like she is doing right now.

There is a certain kind of softness to him when seeing him dressed down like this. The smooth, navy blue cashmere sweater and dark brown colored chino pants engulf him in an air of calm and tranquility, that makes Donna want to inch closer into his side in need of feeling it, too. He hadn't shaved this morning, and the shadow of his beard that's gracing his jaw is eliciting a tingle in Donna's fingertips.

Ever since the wedding, Donna has an even harder time keeping her physical, as well as her emotional, reactions to Harvey at bay. It's confusing and overwhelming her, the way he keeps sneaking into her consciousness at all hours of the day; no matter if she is busy with a case or hiring new people, or if she's doing yoga or reading or watching TV after work. Most of the time it's details that remind her of him, but more and more often it begins to happen out of the blue.

When it does, Donna can feel her internal level of frustration gradually growing. At him, at herself, and at their impossible situation. At the fact that they can't talk about what's between them yet can spend hours on end swaying to the same rhythm without questioning the reasons behind it.

She knows that they aren't back to 'normal' because 'normal' is something they have never really been. And a tiny whisper deep inside of her is telling her that Harvey knows it, too. It's right there in his eyes and in the way he sometimes looks at her, just as it had been there in the way he had held her and had buried his nose into her hair as they had danced at the wedding. It means more; and she's aware that it does, which makes it even more devastating that there is nothing she can do about it.

With a quiet exhale, Donna turns around and looks outside of the window, watching absentmindedly as trees and hills turn from pale and brown to white and sparkling in the early morning sun.

~o~o~

They arrive in the middle of nowhere, a.k.a. Lakeside Lodge, around lunchtime. For the last hour of the drive, Harvey had almost started to believe that they'd have to camp beneath the stars because apart from the occasional small, small-town village, nothing but wood and water had crossed their way.

After their arrival, a bellboy helps them unload their trunk before the four of them head for the reception. The main building, as well as all the enclosed buildings of the resort, are made entirely out of wood, which makes it blend in perfectly with the forest surrounding them, and a sense of peace and serenity overcomes the group as they walk down the stony pathway.

Inside of the lodge, the dark wood emanates a warm and cozy atmosphere, as does the welcoming lounge area by the huge and open fireplace in the corner. The lobby lies deserted before them, with the crackling flames currently the only source of sound. Opposite the fireplace, the four find the front desk, where a young woman is already waiting for them with a gentle smile.

"Welcome to Lakeside Lodge Mr. and Mrs. Ross. And Ms. Paulsen and Mr. Specter," the receptionist Judy greets them, with her smile spreading some more. "I hope you had a pleasant journey up here?"

"Oh, it was perfect. The landscape is truly spectacular," Mike replies excitedly. "You definitely don't find anything remotely close to this down in New York City."

"The area here is something else for sure," the receptionist agrees with a bright smile and a nod. "Alright, let's get you checked in so you can enjoy all of our amenities as quickly as possible."

"That sounds wonderful," Rachel concurs while placing her purse on the counter.

"Perfect," Judy murmurs, as she begins to type away on her computer. "You've made reservations for the Grand Lodge Suite and for the two-room Presidential Suite, is that correct?"

"Yes, that's correct," Rachel confirms. "The Grand Lodge Suite for my husband and myself, and the Presidential Suite for our friends here."

"Fantastic," Judy replies, concentrating on the screen again. It only takes a few short moments to get them checked in, with Rachel already having sent in all the needed information in advance, including the payment for their little trip. "So, here are your key cards. Two for each suite. Should you need more, you can always let us know. You'll find your rooms if you walk down the hallway by the fireplace and then take the first elevator on the righthand side all the way up to the third floor," Judy explains, while handing over the key cards. "The Presidential Suite is down the hall on the right and the Grand Lodge Suite down to the left." Then the woman pulls out a map of the property, turning it in their direction on the counter. "Breakfast is served at the KANU dining room down there from 7:30 to 10:30 am," she says, pointing at another hallway right behind the reception. "And probably one of the most important things: the spa area. You can find it right here," Judy states and uses a pen to circle the far end of the building on the map. "Due to Valentine's Day on Sunday, we have special offers for couple's massages and other treatments, beginning tomorrow."

At the V-Word, Harvey's cellphone almost slips out of his hands. Only due to his quick reflexes, does he catch it before it falls; but the attention of the group is still resting solely on him now. His heart is hammering painfully in his chest and his palms get even sweatier as he realizes that he would be spending Valentine's Day here. With her. In the same suite. With her.

He's never been big on the day, because to him it's always just been the flower and chocolate industry needing an extra day to make even more money than they already do. And for the longest time, he truly believed that his cynical outlook had everything to do with the flower and chocolate industry and nothing to do with the fact that it's just a painful reminder of what he wants and can't have. Only now, lately, for a while, the real truth has become more apparent and obvious to him.

And what he wants, is standing right by his side. So very close and forever too far.

With shaky hands, Harvey coughs an almost toneless "sorry" while he lets his cellphone slide back into the pocket of his coat.

After another moment of silence, Judy continues once more. "Here's the flyer. If you're interested in any of those offers or in any of our regular treatments, you can book them here or via the telephone in your rooms. That's where you'll also find a catalog with everything the spa has to offer."

The woman smiles at each of them, her open expression inviting questions if they should have any. Since everything was resolved for now though, they grab their luggage and head for their rooms.

~o~o~

"Holy shit," Donna exclaims as she enters the spacious Presidential Suite ten minutes later. Her initial worries about having to spend a whole weekend in Harvey's close proximity dissolve into thin air for the moment as she comes to stand in the middle of the huge living area. There is actually so much room that Donna could easily avoid him if she wanted to. Not that she hoped that the need would arise but the way her heart is still thumping loudly in her chest, she wasn't convinced that it wouldn't.

As they look around, they find that oak wood is the dominating material in their room as well; except for the corner of the fireplace, which is undoubtedly the highlight of the entire place. Built into a stony wall, the fire that is already burning inside of it – secured behind an ornate iron fence - is bathing their surroundings in comfortable warmth, drawing both Donna and Harvey even closer. An opulent leather couch is standing in a sufficient distance to the fireplace, with a heavy, wooden coffee table separating the two.

Donna lets her hand slide over the soft leather that is pleasantly warm to her touch. What she wouldn't give to just sit there for a while and watch the fire, soaking in the calming effect of the view and the sounds. Curiosity makes her turn around though, her gaze resting on Harvey who is inspecting the tiny kitchen island by the entrance; even though they are both convinced that neither of them would be using it over the course of the next couple of days.

On the two opposite walls to the left and the right are two doors that are leading to each of their bedrooms. Harvey being the courteous guy that he is lets Donna make her pick first and while looking at them both he already knew that she'd choose the one with the jacuzzi-like bathtub in the enclosed bathroom. That leaves Harvey with the smaller of the two rooms, but with the one that additionally leads out onto a balcony, that has a real jacuzzi hidden in the corner.

Both bedrooms are still big enough to accommodate a whole family though and the spacious king-sized beds look cushy and inviting; especially after getting up at the crack of dawn, followed by a five hours drive into the wilderness. Alas, they had all agreed on meeting up again in half an hour to grab some lunch down by the lake, so the bed would have to wait for a little while longer.

The four of them find a cozy restaurant directly at the shore of Mirror Lake soon after, and with the feeling of the pending goodbyes in a couple of days momentarily banned from their thoughts, the mood between the friends is relaxed and cheerful.

Over lunch, Mike and Rachel tell Harvey and Donna in more detail about their new jobs and the firm they would be taking over in the process. The content expression on Mike's face as he talks about it all is without a doubt proof enough to Donna and Harvey that the newly-weds had made the right decision for them. There is an air of excitement illuminating the two and it's infecting both Donna and Harvey as well.

"Andy Forsyth's assistant has been sending us real estate advertisements all week and we were already able to narrow it down to two last night," Rachel explains enthusiastically, pulling out her cellphone to show some pictures to Donna. "And apparently, you have a doppelgänger on the other side of the country. Because Ella managed to block both houses for us overnight and they won't go back on the market before we've seen them and made our choice."

"Definitely sounds like a woman I'd like," Donna grins, before she looks down on the screen again. "And both houses look really amazing! That huge window front looking out over the bay is breathtaking though. If the rest of the house is just as perfect, I'd definitely pick that one," Donna expels enthusiastically, her eyes glued to her friend's cell phone.

"That's our favorite, too," Mike agrees, leaning back in his chair after he had finished the last of his dessert.

"My God, look at that fireplace!" Donna exclaims, enlarging the picture they've just come across.

"It just adds even more to the coziness of the living room, doesn't it?" Rachel gushes, her eyes sparkling with excitement.

"Oh, absolutely!" Donna agrees, staring at the beauty of the room for another moment before she swipes to the next.

They continue looking through more images for the next few minutes, sharing in the joy and anticipation.

"So… it's definitely gonna be a house then, huh?" Donna asks after they've reached the end, a teasing glimmer shining in her eyes.

"Yeah, it's gonna be a house," Rachel confirms with a wink and a nod. "We'll need the space. One day. Soon-ish. Hopefully." The two women grin at each other knowingly, while Mike and Harvey exchange a silent glance.

"And we definitely need the space for a guest room," Mike adds. "Because you two have to come visit us as often as possible."

"So, there'll be enough space for two guest rooms then, right?" Donna asks and it sounds more like a statement than a question.

A couple of months ago, Harvey wouldn't have known what to make of the painful sting in his heart upon hearing Donna's words. Sitting right here though, with her by his side, he knows without a shred of a doubt that it is triggered by the thought that he would never be able to sleep with her in his arms.

He tries not to dwell on it because the pain and frustration these kinds of thoughts always entail is something that he doesn't want to deal with while the other three are around.

A temporary but ever so loaded quietness settles between the group, which is filled with the heaviness of a million unsaid words. From him. And from her. And even from Rachel and Mike, who have a hard time holding themselves back from just yelling at them to open their goddamn eyes.

"I'm sure we can figure that out when the time comes," Mike replies instead, his hand squeezing Rachel's beneath the table.

"Alright. I don't know about you guys, but I'm ready to chill by the pool for the rest of the day. You game?" Rachel jumps in, looking at her companions questioningly.

Mike is on board instantaneously and Donna's agreement follows right after his. Only Harvey's reply takes a few seconds longer, and he tries to pretend that it isn't because he's nervous about seeing Donna in whatever she had decided to bring along.

All eyes rest expectantly on him, and to cover the awkwardness he is feeling, Harvey throws out the only other thought currently occupying his mind: "What does 'chilling by the pool' even mean? I don't think I'm familiar with the concept."

"He's not kidding. Harvey hasn't been on real vacation since I started working for him," Donna adds.

"No worries, my friend. I'll teach you how it's done," Mike promises.

"You? Teach me?" Harvey shoots back, raising an eyebrow at him.

"The tables are turning already," Mike teases, winking at his former mentor.

"Good luck with that," Harvey just replies, shaking his head slightly to hide the grin, while he signals their waitress to bring the check.

Ten minutes later, they are on their way back to the resort, with both Harvey's and Donna's hearts racing, palms sweating, and minds trying to cope with what would happen next.

~o~o~

Harvey soon learns that seeing Donna in a bikini is even harder than he had prepared himself for. It's not like he's never seen what lies beneath those expensive dresses she wears on a regular basis and it's not like his imagination hadn't run wild every now and then over the last couple of years. And yet, seeing her in that burgundy two piece that revealed more than it covered, is an entirely different thing altogether.

He has to force himself not to stare at the sun lounger right next to his that she is currently occupying in all of her enticing glory. She has her hair tied in a loose bun on top of her head, with only a few strands falling around her face, that Harvey's fingers are itching to tug behind her ears. Her freckled arms are stretched out along her toned body; the yoga she's adamantly been doing for as long as he's known her having formed her stomach and legs in ways that make his blood rush through his veins on high speed. With every tiny movement, her muscles are visibly contracting beneath her taut skin and his palms are aching to slide along the contours they are drawing. He remembers her like this. Has dreamed about her like this. But the reality is so much better than his fantasy and it makes it all that much more painful to know that he will never be able to touch the way he wants to.

Harvey also soon learns that lying around and doing nothing, especially when what he wants to be doing is what he can't be doing, is indeed something he has a hard time adjusting to. There is a nervous restlessness taking hold of his body and mind; not even the newspaper he's brought to the pool is able to keep him occupied long enough to divert him from the feeling inside.

With a sigh, Harvey folds the newspaper back together before he sits up on his lounger. "I'm gonna go outside and swim a few rounds," he announces as he gets up.

"Outside… as in… the cold?" Donna wants to know, looking up at him with surprise in her eyes.

"Yeah. Just sitting around and not doing anything is making me nervous."

"Okay. Well, have fun then." Donna smiles at him gently and Harvey can feel her eyes boring into his back as he walks outside.

With temperatures barely above freezing point, Harvey immediately heads for the warm water, from which a thick cloud of mist is ascending and illuminating the space. Warmth instantly surrounds him; the stark contrast to the cold outside sending a languorous shiver down his spine. He seems to be alone outside, at least judging on how far he can see, and he begins to swim laps without much further ado.

It feels good to utilize his muscles, to feel the resistance of the water that the strength in his arms easily overcomes. With strong pulls he navigates himself through the pool; turning in the opposite direction once he hits the wall at the end. The water is like a soft blanket sliding over his body and while he swims, he tries to concentrate on nothing but the movements of his body.

Half an hour is enough to calm the restlessness inside of him and once he feels a slight pang of exhaustion in his muscles, Harvey moves on to the jacuzzi at the other end of the pool.

From there, he has a better overlook over the area and also through the glass front that separates the outside from the inside. He can see the contours of the sun loungers his friends are occupying, sees how Rachel and Donna are once again staring into one of their cellphones. Donna is laughing at something Rachel says and Harvey can hear the sound in his head so clearly as if he still was lying beside her. In that moment, like in any other moment really, he wants to be the reason she's laughing, while at the same time knowing he couldn't go back inside just yet because his inner balance hadn't fully returned.

And while he sits between the bubbles, he wonders for a moment if it ever would again, especially with Donna being so close. Maybe coming here had been a mistake, after all, seeing how it's less than twenty-four hours in and he can barely keep his emotions under control anymore. And with three more days remaining, he has no idea how he will survive.

Closing his eyes, he leans back before sinking further into the water so that only his head is peeking out over the surface. He dearly wishes he believed in meditating and the likes because he sure as hell would love to find a way to shut up his brain and focus his mind.

And that is all he wants. Peace. Calm. Isn't that the sole purpose of going to a spa? Doesn't that come with the hefty price you have to pay for retreats like these?

Apparently not for Harvey though, because next thing he knows, he hears his name; the sound startling him back to reality.

"Hey, you," Mike greets Harvey cheerfully.

"Hey," Harvey says, opening his eyes and watching Mike as he climbs into the bubbling water.

"You good? You seem awfully quiet today," the younger one assesses, as he takes a seat on the opposite end of the pool.

"Yeah. Just tired," Harvey replies nonchalantly. "Because someone insisted on waking me up four hours before my normal time," he adds with mock annoyance.

"You can drop the act, Harvey. I know you secretly like it here just as much as we do."

"Yeah, because I'm known to visit spas regularly."

"Have you ever been before?"

"No? Which should definitely tell you something…"

"It does. That you've missed out on living."

Harvey wants to reply something more but he knows he's also not really up to his usual game to win a bantering match against Mike. So instead, he redirects their conversation to the first thing that comes to his mind, which is the only thing that's been on his mind all day.

"Where did Donna and Rachel go?"

"They are checking out the saunas," Mike replies with a shrug, his head motioning in the direction of where the women had headed off to.

Immediately Harvey's thoughts are going places and to keep these thoughts from showing on his face, he closes his eyes and leans back against the wall of the jacuzzi again. The restlessness is back, more forcefully than before and he begins to mentally prepare himself for the fact that it probably won't change as long as Donna is so very close.

They sit in silence for a long while, Harvey trying not to drown while Mike keeps studying him from the corner of his eye. It takes him a few minutes to work up his nerve, but once he does, the words slide out without much resistance.

"Will you ever tell her?"

Harvey opens his eyes. "Tell who what?"

"Harvey…"

The expressions on both of their faces are telling the other everything they need to know.

"Mike, I really don't want to talk about it."

"Okay," Mike nods, falling silent again, even if just for a moment.

"I'm just saying… the tension between the two of you since the wedding is excruciating. How long do you think this can go on before it explodes? Or implodes for good?"

"Mike." The tone in his voice sounds almost harsh, if not for the softness that always sneaks in when his mind revolves around her.

"Tell me you don't feel it, too," Mike challenges him with words and the look in his eyes.

The need to shut him down is undoubtedly there, his vocal cords already conjuring up the needed finality he wanted to put into his next words. Because he really, really does not want to talk about it. Talking about it would make it real. And if it were real, it would only make things that much worse. And yet, something deep within him is making him want to say it out loud just as much because it's been kept inside for way too long in the past for thirteen years. Both sides wrestle for dominance inside of Harvey's head, as his gaze drifts towards the snow-covered mountains surrounding them.

Maybe Mike would let it go if he just ignored his last question. And maybe his mind would let it go as well. It's just too much to deal with at this moment in time and he feels like he shouldn't be dropping these walls when there are still three more days to survive. But of course neither lets go and with Mike's eyes still boring into his side, Harvey caves at last.

With a heavy exhale, his gaze refocuses on Mike. "What does it matter if I feel it or not? Donna doesn't and that makes everything else null and void."

"And how would you know if she's feeling it or not? Have you asked her?"

Harvey huffs at Mike's question and rolls his eyes exasperatedly to cover the growing pain, as Donna's voice echoes through his head once more.

'I didn't feel anything when I kissed you. Whatever I thought might be there, wasn't.'

"She told me not too long ago that she doesn't have any feelings for me," Harvey explains and to say it out loud is even more painful than having it only plaguing his mind.

"Wow. I mean, I knew you were old but I didn't know you were that blind yet."

"What did you just say to me?" Harvey is clearly getting irritated now, as a whirlwind of emotions is threatening to sweep him away.

"I'm saying," Mike begins with emphasis, "that you are blind if you believe that Donna doesn't have feelings for you. With the way you look at each other and act around each other, you might as well just yell it out loud."

"I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Come on, Harvey, what are you so afraid of?"

"I am not afraid of anything," Harvey replies, as the ever-present terror at the thought of losing her spreads in his bones. Because he is afraid of that. Or, at least, has been, for the longest time. Lately, however, the fear of losing her has shifted to an even more numbing fear of never being with her. Of never holding her. Of never kissing her. Of never just being with her.

"She's not gonna wait for you forever, you know? One day, a guy is gonna come in and sweep her off her feet. And you'll both have lost something not a lot of people are lucky enough to find."

The thought of losing Donna to someone else isn't really helping to slow the tornado inside of him. Just thinking of anyone getting to hold her the way he had gotten to hold her not too long ago is nearly driving him out of his mind. He knows that Mike is right, but he also knows what Donna had practically yelled at him in the lobby only mere weeks prior.

'I didn't feel anything when I kissed you.'

'She lied,' another tiny voice whispers inside of him, that he's tried to ignore ever since the moment it had happened. He hadn't been in the right frame of mind back then to allow for that kind of hope. And now that it may be true, he has absolutely no idea what to do about it.

Could he trust Mike? More importantly, could he trust himself?

Could he really risk it all?

What Harvey does know, however, is that he needs time and space to think this through. Though the seclusion of their retreat in the wilderness is definitely not the time or the space to do so.

"Mike," Harvey begins, inhaling deeply. "I appreciate your concern, but I really don't want to talk about it right now." And there the finality is, and Mike knows better than to push any further.

~o~o~

"Ouch," Donna hisses, letting the log fall back into the basket. "Shit," she then groans as she looks down at her hand. A fairly big splinter is sticking painfully deep in her right index finger and her whole body is wired as adrenaline is shooting through her veins.

Before she even has a chance to do anything about it, Harvey is already rushing into the living room, concern written all over his face. Her pain is momentarily forgotten, as Donna takes him in. His tousled and wet hair is dripping onto his naked chest, the drops rolling all the way down to where his pajama bottoms are hanging low on his hips. Donna can see how his attention instantly focuses on where her hand is gripping the other, leaving him oblivious to Donna's labored breathing and flushed face.

"What happened? Are you hurt?" He asks, crouching down beside her as he reaches for her hand and brings it closer to his face.

"It's nothing… just a splinter. Don't worry," Donna replies and tries to gently pull back her hand.

Harvey's grip tightens while his eyes find hers. "I heard your cry all the way from the bathroom. It's obviously not nothing."

"It was just the shock. I only need to get-."

"Let me take care of you, please?" Harvey interrupts and helps her up from where she had been sitting on the ground by the fireplace. He guides her over to the sofa, where he signals her to sit down. "I'm gonna go get a pair of tweezers, get that out, and then your hand will be as good as new."

He heads off before Donna can protest and because she doesn't even want to attempt to pull it out with her fingers, she just sits and waits for Harvey to return. Her heart is racing at the pictures that keep flashing through her head; of shirtless Harvey and wet Harvey and naked Harvey, that all blur into one explosive bubble expanding in her chest. All of a sudden, the suite seems too small for them and what they are and what they don't say, and she wonders how they are supposed to make it through the weekend without breaking their fragile bond of normalcy.

The afternoon at the pool and the tense dinner that followed had already been an almost unbearable test for her sanity and their getaway had only just begun. She reminds herself that the purpose of this trip is to bid farewell to her friends. Though when Harvey returns a minute later; with his hair ruffled even more and a black t-shirt now clinging to his still damp upper body in all the right places, it doesn't feel like this whole trip is about anything other than them.

She watches him as he walks closer, and while it's not like she hasn't had to watch him shirtless all afternoon already, somehow, in the confinement of their room, alone, everything all of a sudden feels a lot more intimate. And a lot more dangerous.

Harvey sits down right next to her; way too close for her mind to focus, while his body emanates an intoxicating warmth and a fresh scent of cotton and musk and him. For a brief moment his eyes rest on Donna's, before his attention shifts to the task at hand. Careful not to hurt her, Harvey moves slowly but deliberately, the small, silvery gadget helping him to free Donna of the splinter.

Another hiss echoes through the silence, which is quickly followed by a relieved sigh as the sting instantaneously abates. Their eyes meet, as Harvey's thumb gently soothes her finger; the caress electrifying and spreading from where they are touching to all the places she wants to be touched.

"Thanks, Harvey," Donna says, the words barely making it out due to the dryness in her throat.

"Of course," he replies, studying her reaction curiously. "What were you doing anyway?"

"I wanted to keep the fire going so we wouldn't have to sit in the cold for that glass of wine you wanted to drink."

"We don't have to drink wine if you don't want to?" Harvey notes insecurely, the movement against her skin now ceasing. "We could just go to bed."

"Oh no. No, no. I definitely want a glass. I need to sterilize the wound from the inside," she explains with a sheepish smile.

"Oh, of course. Yeah. We should definitely get you that wine then before you catch a serious infection and die of blood poisoning," Harvey deadpans, grinning back at her.

Only reluctantly does he let go of her hand and both of them immediately feel the loss of their connection not only physically but emotionally even more. It doesn't feel right to let go, not when it feels so overwhelmingly perfect to hold each other.

The air is crackling, and it has nothing to do with the fire that is dancing in front of them but everything with the one flaring between them. A flame that could easily burn them both. They know it's there. Can feel the heat that they dare not touch, no matter how tempting it seems.

To put some distance between them and break their magnetic pull, Harvey clears his throat and finally gets up from his seat. He heads for the fireplace first, finishing what Donna had set out to do. Carefully, he throws the log into the flames and watches as it catches fire before he walks over to the kitchen island to get the wine.

Donna stares after him, her heart still hammering quickly and loudly in her chest. With every minute that passes, the carefully rebuilt lines between them blur once more. Luckily, she doesn't have much time to dwell on it, as Harvey returns soon after with two filled glasses in his hands.

"There you go," Harvey says, holding one of them in her direction.

"Thank you," she replies and takes it from him.

He falls into his spot right next to her again, with just enough space to feel safe, but far enough to long to be closer. For the first few moments, an almost comfortable silence settles around them, as they both wind down from the day they've had. Their breaths even out simultaneously; all by themselves adjusting to the pace of the other until they can't be told apart anymore.

It takes a while, but once Donna feels like she has finally regained some sort of control of her emotions, she turns towards Harvey. "So… are you deeply relaxed yet after a day of doing nothing?"

Her question elicits a deep chuckle; the sound aiming for her heart like an arrow. "To be honest? I think doing nothing is stressing me out more than doing something."

Donna looks at him for a second. "You do realize that that's not a healthy attitude, right? Your body needs rest every once in a while," she reminds him. "At least if you don't wanna die of a heart attack."

"I know, I know. People keep telling me that," Harvey replies half-annoyed, even though the lopsided grin is telling her that it isn't really annoyance at all.

"Maybe you should listen to these people for a change?" Donna shoots back with a teasing glance.

"I'm here, am I not?" Harvey counters her question, as he raises an eyebrow at her.

They exchange a smile that instantly lightens the atmosphere. "Yeah, you are," Donna says, before she takes a sip from her wine; hoping that at least the alcohol would help ease that feeling inside of her. "And I'm sure by the time the weekend is over, you'll have gotten used to relaxing."

"You sound very sure of that."

"Oh, I am," Donna nods enthusiastically. "I already see you voluntarily going mudding with Louis in the immediate future."

That makes Harvey laugh for real now, the sound coming from deeper within and shaking his body. "Not until hell freezes over," he huffs, shaking his head dramatically before he takes a sip from his glass.

"Oh come on, you'd make him the happiest person alive, Harvey."

"Yeah, and myself the most miserable person alive. No. No way," Harvey assures vehemently. "Even the slightest chance for that ever happening was destroyed the night he told Jessica and me about Missy Dietler."

The horrified expression on Harvey's face spikes Donna's interest. "What about Missy Dietler?"

"Has he never told you the story?"

"What story?"

"About him and Missy Dietler and… the mud?"

"No, he definitely hasn't told me that story."

"Oh. Okay. Good. Because believe me, you do not want to know."

"Don't I?"

"You definitely don't. Trust me."

In the end, the expression in his eyes is all the conviction Donna needs to not ask for more details, especially since the images that her head had conjured are already bad enough.

"Alright. No mudding for you and Louis then, I guess."

"Yeah, no mudding for Louis and me," Harvey agrees.

"Should I be worried that I went mudding with him that one time last year?"

"Did he fall asleep?"

"No, he didn't. But what's that got to do with anything?"

"Nothing. It… nothing. But you don't have to worry, everything's good," Harvey chuckles, shaking his head in disbelief as the memories from that night keep flashing through his mind.

Donna eyes him quizzically but decides once more that when it comes to Louis, it probably really is better to not ask any more questions.

As they each take another sip of the red wine, they get lost in thought for a moment. Harvey prays that the alcohol will quickly swipe away those pictures of Louis in a tub full of mud, even when the momentary distraction from all his other thoughts and Donna's close proximity had been a welcome sensation to his nervous system. He's only pulled out of it when her voice echoes through the quietness.

"I'm really gonna miss them," she murmurs, sinking further back into the pillows of the couch with a sigh.

"I know, I'm gonna miss them, too," he admits, exhaling deeply. "But you heard them, we can visit them as often as we want in that big and fancy house of theirs."

"But it won't be the same," Donna states, her gaze now lingering on the flames blazing in the fireplace.

"We're going to make it work, you'll see." Harvey's voice is reassuring, and so is his gaze, even though Donna is still too focused on the fire to really take notice of it.

There is a short silence again, with only the crackling sounds of the fire filling up the space. It's almost meditative to listen to it, to watch the fiery sparks floating through the air behind the iron fence.

"We are going to be okay without them, right?" Donna pensively asks after a moment, absentmindedly bringing the glass to her lips.

Harvey watches her staring at the fire; its flames raging in her eyes. The need to reassure her with more than just his words is swelling inside of him, as his arms begin to tingle in remembrance of how it had felt like to hold her close to his heart.

"Of course, Donna," Harvey replies unwaveringly. "We were fine for a long time before they came along weren't we?"

His open words finally make Donna look back at him and she's caught off-guard by the honesty and warmth she finds on his face.

"We were" she agrees with a small smile.

His next words are out before Harvey can think too much about the ramifications of them. "As long as we have each other, everything's going to be okay."

Donna's eyes widen in surprise. His statement is already shocking enough as it is but the underlying meaning that's resonating with it, leaves her breath stuck in her throat. Instantly and instinctively, she waits for him to take it back or for the panic to flare up in his eyes that would once again make him flee the moment. She braces herself for it; braces herself for another heartbreak that would surely come.

Only… nothing happens. Harvey almost seems relaxed, with his eyes open and steady as he looks at her. The clenching of his jaw is the only visible sign revealing that at least some sort of tension is flickering inside of him. Donna doesn't really know what to say, as past experiences have instilled a deep trepidation to say the wrong thing and drive him away.

When the silence drags on, however, and Donna doesn't say anything for two minutes straight, worry grows inside of him after all. That maybe he had said too much. That maybe the tension and everything he's felt that day have all just been in his head.

"We will, right?" He asks nervously, looking for reassurance in her eyes.

"Be alright?" Donna asks surprised. "You just said that we would be!" The sound that escapes her is caught somewhere between humor and fear, the whirlwind of feelings only unsettling her even more.

"No," Harvey begins, while looking for a little more courage deep inside of him. "I mean… always have each other?"

As the words are sinking in, the question and what it means, they realize that they have just entered very dangerous ground. A ground that is as fragile as the frozen Mirror Lake that afternoon and with every step further into their conversation, they can hear the ice cracking beneath them; the sound and the feeling shooting adrenaline through their bodies.

There are a million things Donna wants to say. And another million more that they both should say. And if they weren't Donna and Harvey but two normal friends sharing a suite, sipping wine in front of a fireplace in their pajamas, it would without a doubt lead the pair to have a heart-to-heart conversation right then and there.

Unfortunately though, they are Donna and Harvey, who excel in their ability to ignore the truth and to withstand even the most commanding of pulls. Donna breaks their eye-contact first, looking back into the fire again. The flames are warming her face and the sensation is distracting her for a moment from the aching inside.

"Of course, Harvey. We'll always have each other," Donna replies, but her smile doesn't reach her eyes.

Harvey wonders if the resignation he thinks he's heard is actually there or if it's just in his imagination. But the way her body seems to have shrunk in size after she had turned away from him inclines him to believe that it hasn't been his imagination and it breaks his heart to know that he might be the reason for her reaction.

Not knowing what else to say or do, he exhales a whispered "good", even though 'good' is the last word he'd use to describe the feelings that are carrying him away.

~o~o~

A/N: Parts 2 and 3 are already written and will be posted on Saturday and Sunday, so you won't have to wait too long. I hope you all enjoyed this first installment and if you have another minute to spare, I'd really love to hear your thoughts :) Thank you! And Happy Valentine's Day xoxo

And my most heartfelt thank you's to Nanna ( Nannalyn) and Aimee ( AimeeValle1), for taking care of this one shot turned 'monster' in such a short time. You're true heroes. True friends. And true artists (please, go check out their wonderful stories, if you haven't already!). Love you both!