(Hey, this is a new story and my first time writing on here! I hope you enjoy reading it! This is going to be kind of an AU)

'Thoughts'

{Special Actions}

~Memories~

Dying right as the paramedics arrive to save your sorry ass from a car crash is a cruel way to go in terms of irony.

Alas.

Here I am, in the abyss of what I can only assume is Hell given my life choices.

My name is Anastasia Volkov, born in Russia and immigrated to the US when I was 12.

My dad was the head of the Russian Mob: Viktor Volkov. My mother was his Queen, his right hand itself: Irina Ivanov.

They got married 2 years before I was born, and their relationship slowly deteriorated as time went on.

I was born and Mama became distant after finding out I had clawed my way out of her so fiercely she wouldn't be able to have another baby, Papa was happy at first but slightly disappointed he didn't have a true heir.

I was groomed to be a soldier, raised by money and blood and violence.

I was Mama's little Cobra and Papa's little Soldat.

My mother disliked me because my father was being pushed to find a new wife so he could have a true heir to carry the family name by my grandfather.

I was a prodigy in fighting and science, the arts intrigued me but I had to sneak out to paint and listen to music and dance like it was some horrible contraband.

I looked okay, decent curves, lean and muscular, pretty face, blue eyes, blond hair.

I spoke 5 languages, I idolized Natasha Romanov, I was polite and a magnificent liar, etc.

But my parents didn't know that I had a secret love of anime, I was maybe an otaku (most likely).

The time and effort that went into making beautiful tragedies and love stories for people to enjoy caught my attention at 13 and I had been watching anime ever since.

I died on a Saturday, frosted dew on the grass as the moon shined brightly beside the stars.

Not quite the day I thought I was gonna die on, but I digress.

I was invited to a party downtown by some friends, I went and we all got smashed.

Then Evan wanted to drive and I wasn't sober enough to say "no" so we got in his car and went tearing downtown like we were in a racing movie.

Too bad a red truck came around a corner too fast and smashed into the back of the car.

We went flying off the road and into a building, glass and blood went everywhere... It was not a pretty scene at all.

Evan died on impact and I had a concussion, probably internal bleeding and more injuries I can't place over the overwhelming sensation of pain.

As I sat there, bleeding out next to my dead best friend as the paramedics were called by a frantic truck driver, I pondered what death would be. I bled out just as the ambulance arrived and I got yeeted into the darkness.

I don't know how long I was there, it could've been hours, minutes, days, months, hell even years.

I blinked and found myself in a new equally as dark void.

What in the fresh hell?

Turns out the inky abyss is actually liquid that I should most likely be drowning in but alas, I live.

xXx

But... What is this? I'm… Not drowning in a suspicious liquid that I am certain I am submerged in? Nani the fuck?

Oh no…. No no no nonono I better not be where I think I am god so help me. I've read enough reincarnation fanfictions and all that.

I vehemently refuse.

"Osu! Anata wa sore o okonau koto ga dekimasu misu!¹" I heard a foreign feminine voice encourage. Oh balls I really am being born again… Why has god forsaken me?

I know I broke Brock's nose with a book when I was in 8th grade but he had it coming for teasing the trans girl in my class!

…

Alright, fair enough, sending him to the hospital was a bit mean but c'mon!

Fine, maybe I had this coming but this is just bullshit.

I feel like I'm being shoved abruptly out of a condom inside of a squishy slime thing, which is not my best analogy but I'm probably in shock.

Is this really what birth feels like?

Oh god if I ever have kids I am apologizing to them the minute they pop out.

Slime covered my face and my ears feel waterlogged as I finally enter into this world.

Bright lights assault my poor undeveloped eyes and I cry out in pain because OW.

I close my eyes and sob as I feel the gravity of what's really going on hit me just like that stupid truck that killed me.

I'm really am baby again… Wow… I have no words. Just minutes ago I was a 17 year old Senior in high school with a sardonic sense of humor and violent tendencies and now I'm in a hospital being wrapped in what feels like sandpaper on my sensitive skin.

I sob loudly, crying out to a world that I have yet to know for the mental strain of my situation because gods above I was a fucking baby again and I have just been born what even is my life anymore.

Soothing noises enter my ears as soft, warm arms cradle my tiny body. 'So this is mom… She's nice and warm, I like her'. I had tuned out the world during my mini-breakdown.

I think it's called disassociation.

Anyway I tuned back in to hear what I could only assume is my mother talking so I turn in the general direction of her voice and strain my tiny ears to hear what she's saying in somewhat clarity.

"Anata wa daijōbu, okāsan wa koko ni iru, dārin wa nakanaide!²" A cheery but tired voice comes from the giant dark blob holding me. So this is my mom… I hope she's better than the last one.

My lungs begin to tire out as my new mom hushed me gently, the bright lights and my mom's soothing voice washed over me with tiredness like a wave.

As I drift off in the midst of bright lights and soothing warmth, I wonder where my new father is supposed to be.

'I can only hope he's nicer than the first one I had'

(Translations: I totally used Google Translate so feel free to tell me if some things need changing!

*1: Push! You can do it Miss!

*2: You're fine, mom is here, darling don't cry

The next chapter will be longer! Feel free to point out any spelling or translation errors that I might have missed. I don't have a Beta, might cross-post this on AO3)