Hello! Welcome to my fanfic! A couple notes before you read. I am not super well versed in a ton of the in depth Star Wars lore, so I have researched a little bit to try to fill in the holes here.

This is a bit of an Alternate ending for those of you who are REYLO fans! I may continue it to do a short, fluff heavy story with possibility of a lemon if there is interest! Constructive reviews are appreciated, if you hate it…. Well then this isn't the droid story your looking for!

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Numb.

That was the only way Rey could describe her state of being. The only other thing she felt was a strange sort of static where Ben should have been. She knew that Fin and Poe had been watching her for weeks following the events on Exogol, both with deep concern. She had returned to Ajan Kloss after laying Luke and Leia's lightsaber's to rest on Tatooine and seemed to continue life as normal, but she was quiet and often seemed distracted when her friends called out to her. She meditated often and had all but isolated herself. Even earlier today, Fin had invited her to join them on a routine supply run aboard the Millennium Falcon and the idea of the fantastic ship had barely stirred her from her thoughts. Despite her preoccupied mind, she felt bad. She didn't want to turn down her friends or make them worry, but she simply wanted more time and peace to sort through the vast amount of emotion she was feeling. Despite her best efforts, her mind continually returned to those final moments.

She had awoken confused and shocked in Ben's arms. Taking in his features, she recalled when she first saw him. Even through her fear and his harsh attacks on her mind with the force, she felt inexplicably drawn to him. His face had seemed hard and unyielding, cold. The face of Kylo Ren. As he held her there in the Emperor's throne room however, his features had softened. Ben Solo's face was more kind, more open.

"Ben." She whispered, smiling. The relief she felt through the bond caused his mouth to curve slightly in a smile. She had touched his face tentatively, hesitating only for a moment before she kissed him deeply. He had embraced her and returned the kiss with equal passion and no matter how she tried, she couldn't erase the feel of his lips against hers. The bond flared with the love that surged through it. Rey had been overwhelmed with joy, making Ben grin at her widely. Then… he was gone. The emotions they had shared for what felt like a lifetime were snuffed as the last bit of life left his body. Rey panicked, fearing he might disappear, yet his body remained.

Rey opened her eyes, coming back to the present. Slowly, she allowed herself to shake off her meditation and rose stiffly from the ground. She had not levitated as she had during Leia's training, her mind too tumultuous. The Resistance base had become more of a village now and routinely went quiet after darkness fell. The Force told Rey that everyone was either close to, or completely asleep. Walking back through the night shrouded jungle, she kept thinking about certain abilities of the Force that Leia had told her about.

The idea had been going through her mind constantly since they had come back and as she moved along the wooden and metal walkways back to her little hut, she slowed her pace until she came to a hesitant halt. Rey had no idea how these abilities worked, or if they would completely ruin the balance of the force. Turning slowly and looking back towards a medical tower cobbled together by the Resistance, she thought about what her actions could possibly bring. It was too dangerous, too uncertain!

"Don't do this Rey." She whispered to herself and took three more steps away from the structure before pausing once again. Hazel eyes swept the dark jungle, finding the Falcon still gone from its usual place of rest.

"This is a dangerous and complicated idea, Rey." She whirled and saw Leia's ghost watching her, hands clasped before her and watching the young woman sternly.

"Leia!" She suddenly felt embarrassed at having been caught off guard so easily by her teacher and quickly composed herself. "I shouldn't want the things I do. But I feel so… alone. You and Ben were the only ones who knew who I was and didn't turn away in fear of what I might become." Rey confessed quietly. The girl clenched her fist and bit her bottom lip, feeling as if she had been too open about her feelings, but Leia had always had a way of making her speak without ever asking. The ghostly woman walked towards her.

"To feel this way and not face it is more dangerous than having the courage to acknowledge it. Rey." The girl returned her eyes to Leia's. "I want you to make me a promise," she raised a brow and pinned her apprentice with a stern gaze, "You must promise me that if you feel as if your own life will slip away, you will abandon your plan. That is the only way that I will teach you to use the force to restore a lost life." Shock froze Rey in place. Was Leia truly agreeing to this? After a moment she nodded numbly.

"I promise." Then for the first time in weeks, Rey allowed herself a small smile. "Leia…"

"I know." The woman said, returning the smile. Rey nodded, then strode off towards the medical tower.

"If this fails, it could destroy her." Luke appeared beside his twin after Rey had gone. She simply nodded.

"I gave my life to bring Ben back to the light. If I can give them even one more chance to be happy, then I'll do it." Luke shook his head, but knew better than to argue with his sister once her mind was made up.

Rey had made her way to the last room of the medical tower and then paused at the door. Soft clanks of metal and the gentle rock of jungle trees echoed through the halls and thin walls as she hesitated. Poe and Fin had seen this was done for her, but the man she loved deserved better. Guilt at what she asked them to do still clawed at her mind and she hadn't been able to bring herself to come see him. But she had to see if there was still a spark of Ben left in this plane.

Inhaling a shaky breath, she pushed the door open. The room was pitch black and almost oppressively silent except for the narrow lines of light that flooded through the door. They fell over a waist height structure in the center of the room, revealing only small sections of what lay in the darkness. Reaching out with the Force to illuminate the room, an aged light flickered and slowly became brighter. Rey's breaths came quickly as she fought to control the adrenaline that rose inside her and walked forward. As if sculpted by the finest artists, there rested Ben on a rough stone slab, his body preserved in carbonite. His face seemed calm, his hands resting gently by his sides as if he was only asleep. Then the adrenaline was replaced with grief and tears flowed unchecked down her cheeks.

"I'm sorry Ben." She whispered and touched his cheek with a shaking hand. "I should have been stronger and just let you go." The familiar static seemed deafening now, only reminding her of his absence. She had tried to study about Dyads in the Force, and her and Ben's bond. She had learned that they couldn't really be severed unless one individual or the other created a wound in the force, such as turning to the dark side. Clearly, Ben returning to the light side hadn't broken the bond, and death could not sever it, so why couldn't she sense him now? She needed to find out, but until then she had to be strong and study hard with Leia if she wanted the chance to bring him back to her.

Rey wondered if she had wildly underestimated the Force Revival ability. Leia had trained her for months and even now she was unsure if she could perform the ability correctly. The medic team had unfrozen Ben's body and luckily determined that no harm had come to it during the freezing process.

"We do need to warn you though Miss Skywalker. If we try to refreeze the remains now, it might not work." Rey hated that he had just called Ben by that term, but she took a steadying breath and let it slide. She had to keep her composure.

"I really wish you would reconsider this." Fin said, his voice breaking her thoughts from where he stood at Ben's feet. Rey looked at him, her brows furrowing slightly before softening once again. She touched his shoulder.

"I'm sorry Fin, you just don't know him like I know him. But Kylo Ren is dead for good. Ben is different."

"Is he?" The Ex trooper questioned her, his irritation rising. She could feel his own growing energy with the force swirling with unease and distrust.

"If I had given in to the doubt I had about Ben turning back to the light, you would all be dead. I needed him on Exogol." She told him gently. Fin could see her point, but he was still uncertain.

"You never did tell us why." Rey sighed and looked back down at Ben's still, pale face.

"Just trust me." She said, resolved. Fin shook his head and walked from the room. He wouldn't stand by and watch his best friend resurrect a monster. The medical staff also stepped from the small room, giving Rey a chance to work. It was now or never.

She breathed deeply, centering herself and closing her eyes. Placing her hand over Ben's. Words echoed through her mind.

"I offered you my hand once. Why didn't you take it?" He'd asked. She inhaled and exhaled, focusing on the Force and searching for his lost spirit, the way Leia had instructed her. Her mind flew across planets and galaxies, seeing colors and hearing sounds she had never experienced before. It could have been only seconds, or several years before Rey felt a flicker of Ben. The Force brought her to a grey space that was nothing and everything all at once. The energy that resided there was all too familiar.

"Ben… Be with me." She called. A twinge in her physical body nearly threw her concentration but she pushed it aside.

"Rey, come back! It's too much!" She heard Leia, but Ben was so close now, within reach!

"Please, be with me." She called again, centering her thoughts. The energy materialized before her, Ben's face looking out at her in disbelief. She imagined holding her hand out to his as she had done in the hut on Ahch-to. His energy reached for hers and she gripped his hand, suddenly being ripped back to the medical room.

Her eyes snapped open and she was clutching Ben's hand. She panted for breath and leaned on the stone supporting him before looking to his face. Several heartbeats passed, but he did not stir. Nothing. She had tried and failed. Tears welling up, Rey fought the sobs that threatened to tear her apart and squeezed her eyes shut. Her body ached, but her heart ached more and she couldn't think.

"I'm all alone without you." She confessed softly and allowed herself to cry.

"You're not alone." A deep voice told her, raspy from disuse. Rey's body froze for a split second before looking back to Ben's face. His dark eyes opened slightly as he looked at her, his fingers weakly wrapping around hers. Words escaped her and she simply looked down at him in shock. Very slowly, he managed to smile at her.

Please forgive the clumsy formatting, I haven't posted a story in a while and need to relearn how to make the format work. I hope you enjoyed it! If so, please follow so I know to post the rest of my drabbles about Rey and Ben =)

Lady Taiyou