Disclaimer: I do not now, nor have I ever owned the rights to 911 or its characters. It all belongs to Fox TV and the show's creators like Brad Falchuk and whoever else.

Special Shout out to the_scarlet_01, a truly brilliant author on AO3 who wrote the story "Fear in the Shadows" from which this prompt was taken.

Based loosely on the Prompt: Buck is isolated and shunned after the lawsuit fiasco so when he starts to feel weird. He goes for a check up and doctors find a shadow on his lung or liver and tell him he needs a biopsy. A terrified Buck keeps this to himself, feeling that he can't go to the team because they're all so mad at him. On the day of the biopsy Athena happens to be at the hospital and sees Buck being wheeled in for the procedure. She is horrified and then furious as she goes to the team. They rush to Buck.

Note: Might not follow the entire prompt exactly, slight AU from the show.

Warning: Possible life threatening illness, strong language, and sexual content. Apologies in advance if anyone seems OOC.

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The Darkness Can't Have You

Chapter 1

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The bite of the needle was sharp as it penetrated the skin of Buck's arm and dug deeper to reach the vein below.

Buck winced but kept his eyes steady as he watched the unnamed nurse draw his blood into three separate vials. It was a morbidly fascinating sight watching his blood lightly spurt out and fill the delicate glass.

His blood... the cause of much of the upheaval in his life as of late.

He had coughed up a lot of it at his welcome back party and collapsed when the blood clots that had developed due to his leg getting crushed had traveled to his lungs. Having to go on blood thinners because of this malfunction, Bobby keeping him off the team because of it, which had of course led to him filing a lawsuit to get his job back. That had gone spectacularly well with the people he loved most beyond pissed at him because the bottom-feeding attorney he had hired had used everything Buck had told him about his teammates to go for the jugular.

He had dropped the lawsuit and he had been allowed back to work, make to the one's who mattered most to him. However, he hadn't been exactly welcomed back.

There had been no welcome back party.

Bobby kept him off calls and stuck him with the worst chores. He still referred to him as "Buckley" and just looked at him with disappointment and annoyance.

Chim and Hen talked to him at least, but it was stilted and Buck knew they were still a little pissed at him for sharing personal information about them, and for making Cap out to be the bad guy.

Eddie though, Eddie was all the way pissed at him and made it abundantly clear he wanted the whole firehouse to know it. When he wasn't completely ignoring Buck he would yell at him for even the most minor screw up.

From where he sat Buck felt his heart give a painful, almighty lurch because Eddie yelling at him or ignoring him was okay, Buck could deal with it. The worst thing that happened because of Buck's lawsuit disaster was that Eddie told him flat out that he wasn't allowed to see Christopher, just call him sometimes and even then Eddie wouldn't let them speak for very long, always telling Chris that Buck was busy with something.

It tore Buck's heart to shreds each time.

He missed that darling angel with all of his heart. He missed the way he would through his head back when he laughed and smiled that megawatt grin of his. He missed the adorable way he shuffled when he walked, the sound his walking canes would make against the floor, his sweet voice calling him HIS Buck, and most of all he missed holding Chris in his arms, feeling for himself that the child was safe and alive after everything they went through together, despite him having lost Chris during the tsunami.

Another thing that Buck would never forgive himself for. He still had nightmares about the water and losing Chris, and this distance from his only support system just amplified and worsened them. Now he saw his family's disappointment in him, their recrimination, and most prominently, Eddie's hate.

He loved Chris so much, but he also loved Eddie. What a sucky time to realize he had fallen in love with his best friend on top of everything else he was going through.

Buck had even stopped going over to Maddie's since the couple of times he had gone there and seen Chim, things had gotten really, really awkward. His big sis was finally in a good place with a greta guy like Chim, the last thing Buck wanted to do was contaminate that with his issues and his unhappiness, his heartache.

It had been two months since Buck had come back to work, and nothing was fixed, in fact everything had gotten worse.

He might not have been told to his face but it was clear he wasn't welcome to communal meals at the Firehouse, or to gatherings outside of it. He had to find out through facebook and instagram about dinners and get togethers, had to sit in his cold and empty apartment and stare at the pictures of everyone smiling and being together. The horrid feeling of being on the outside looking in.

No one had thought once to invite him, and even though Maddie would always call and ask where he was or when he would be showing up, he'd just make a plausible excuse to avoid going. He was thankful that Maddie was only at some of these events, so her suspicions hadn't been fully raised. If Maddie knew about how alienated he felt, she would surely go on the warpath.

Buck was shaken from his melancholy thoughts by the nurse's pleasant voice.

" Alright Mr. Buckley, we are all set. You can head back over to the doctor, he would like to discuss things a bit more with you." The nurse with kind brown eyes and dark blond hair said with a reassuring smile.

Buck tried to smile back at the kindly nurse but it most likely looked like a grimace. The nurse just gave him an understanding look as he got up from the medical chair and all but fled back to the doctor's office.

The doctor was a tall and built man in his early forties, salt and pepper hair and a calmness about him that served him well considering his field.

Oncology.

" What happens now Dr. Matthews?" Buck asked as he sat across from the good doctor.

" Well Mr. Buckley, the test is going to take some time but we would call you in as soon as we get the results. I have to again assure you that this is just a precaution because of the bruising Dr. Wilson observed on your back during your regular check up and that I saw for myself. Given that you are still on blood thinners and your overall health over wise, the chances of the test coming back positive are indeed very low." Dr. Matthews assured.

" But there is still a chance that I could have leukemia" Buck said sadly, bluntly.

" Unfortunately there is always a chance of something going wrong, we won't know for sure until we get your test results back in two weeks." Dr. Matthews said with an apologetic look.

" I understand." Buck says with a tired smile.

They spoke more, Dr. Matthews trying to assure Buck further, hating to see the resignation that was clear in Buck's eyes and feeling powerless to chase it away, because there really wasn't much else that he could do until he had the young man's test results.

Only after that could they determine the next step for Evan Buckley.

Buck left Dr. Matthews' office in a daze, while the hospital went about with its normal flurry of activity around him. It was like he was walking through cement while everyone else was going at twice the speed.

Leukemia... He might have fucking blood cancer now on top of everything else.

Buck was so lost in his quiet terror and dejection he didn't once notice the pair of shrewd dark eyes watching him from a few feet away as he headed towards the elevator to leave the hospital. From where she stood Sergeant Athena Grant frowned in displeasure. She had come here to check up on the victim of a carjacking that had happened earlier in the day, the poor man having actually been dragged several feet by the seatbelt as the high on PCP teenager who had tried to steal his car had driven down the street wildly. The teenage had crashed into a concrete barricade and given himself a nice big concussion. Thankfully the man had not been too severely injured, just sporting some painful road-rash. The 118 had responded but Athena had observed that a certain blue eyed young firefighter had once again been tellingly absent.

When Athena had casually asked her dear husband where Evan Buckley was at, Bobby had shrugged and said there were chores that needed to be tended to back at the Firehouse. It hadn't been lost on Athena how quietly furious Eddie Diaz had grown at the mere mention of Buck, while Hen had grown sad, and Chim looked guilty. Bobby on the other hand had been stone-faced but Athena knew her husband well, she could see that he was trying to keep his own sadness and longing for Buck from showing.

Athena stepped forward and looked around the corner and down the hallway that Buck had just emerged from and felt her heart slam to a dead stop inside her chest.

Buck had come out of the Oncology Department. That boy, her boy whether she wanted to admit it or not, had just come out of the Department dedicated to treating the worst kind of illness known to man.

Cancer.

Athena turned back sharply towards the elevators, her frown doubling before she shook her head.

No not Buck, Buck was fine he probably just came in for a checkup and the doctor's office happened to be located in the same place as the oncology department. She wasn't going to panic and jump to conclusions, and besides that Buck would surely tell Bobby if something this huge was going down.

Shaking her head but with a lingering anxiety taking hold in the pit of her stomach, Athena turned away and headed over to the other side of the hospital to check on the drugged out teenager who had injured himself severely after causing yesterday's mess. At the very least that boy would be getting a stern talking to, headache and all.

Later that evening while she and Bobby were sitting down to a cozy dinner for two while Harry and May were at Michael's for the night, Athena tried to bring up the subject of what she saw.

" Glad to hear yesterday's carjacking victim's gonna be okay, road rash is no fun though." Bobby said lightly as he pushed around the salad on his plate.

" Mm-hm. How are things at the Firehouse?" She asked casually as she took a bite of the delicious lemon chicken.

" Everything's okay, running smoothly." Bobby answered lightly.

" And Buck?" Athena pressed carefully.

She resisted the urge to roll her eyes as she watched her husband immediately shut down.

" Bobby how much longer are you going to keep him on the bench?" Athena asked quietly.

" Until he learns he's not invincible and there are consequences to his actions." Bobby said with finality and a stubborn set to his face.

" You sure you're not just punishing him for the sake of punishing him? He's already apologized for the lawsuit a dozen times, and he didn't do it out of malice, he just wanted to get back at the job he loves, but more importantly the people he cares for." Athena said with a shake of her head.

" It's because I care about him that I am doing all this Athena. I have seen him hurt too many times because of his own recklessness. I am going to do what I have to, to get him to learn, and to keep him safe." Bobby said, even though some of his reasons sounded a little hollow in his own ears.

He was still mad at Buck about the lawsuit, because it actually had cut him deeply that the kid, who pretty much was his kid had gone and done this, had hired that jerk Chase Mackey and naively blabbed their personal information to him.

Athena sighed, knowing that at this point Bobby wasn't willing to see that his own actions had consequences, that the rest of the Firehouse was following his lead and that it could lead to making things worse.

What Athena didn't know just yet was that Bobby's actions and attitude had already led to Buck being pretty much ostracized at the Firehouse.

One week later...

Athena made her way into the Firehouse eager to see her husband and the rest of the team, but especially the youngest. This last week had been so hectic for Athena with fools losing their minds left and right, robberies, road rage, and even a runaway miniature pony that she hadn't been able to stop by and keep tabs of Buck like she had wanted after seeing him at the hospital that day.

Well today Buck was going to get her full attention, she was going to get some answers from him.

Athena nodded to a couple of the other firefighters that called the Firehouse home as she passed them, being careful to stay out of sight of her husband and any of the others like Eddie or Hen. She looked high and low and then finally spotted Buck through the glass of the locker room area. She could see the slumped curve of Buck's spine, he was the picture of utter dejection and it made something in the veteran police sergeant ache. Athena frowned in confusion as to why he was sitting in the locker room with no indication that he would be moving anytime soon when it was lunchtime and it looked like everyone else was gathered upstairs.

As she drew closer to the locker room, Athena pulled off her glasses and resisted the urge to gasp at what she saw.

Buck was sitting on the bench all alone. Athena's heart plummeted to her feet when she saw Buck's face. Even in profile he looked absolutely awful. His face was paler than a sheet, making the signature birthmark over his left eye look almost like it was a bleeding wound.

There were dark circles under his eyes that looked honestly more like bruises, and his face once so vibrant and full of life was now gaunt and sickly looking. His eyes, once so bright were now almost dull to the point of being gray, and if Athena looked closer she could see that they were red and irritated, as if not too long ago Buck had shed tears.

Not being able to stand it anymore, Athena silently stepped over the threshold into the locker room, closing the door behind her as she spoke.

" Buck?" She called quietly.

Buck let out a startled gasp, scrambling to his feet looking like he wanted to run as fast as he could but he knew he was trapped and stayed frozen where he was.

" H-Hey Athena, what are you doing here?" Buck asked with false normality.

" Oh I was in the neighborhood and thought I would stop by for lunch. Why don't you have a seat so we can catch up, haven't seen you in ages." Athena said gently as she gestured for Buck to sit back down on the bench.

Buck knew there was no use in fighting Athena Grant so he deflated fully and nodded.

" Yes Ma'am." Buck said quietly, averting his gaze and sitting on the bench like he'd been told.

That little "Yes Ma'am" just about made Athena's heart die. Athena quickly reigned in her emotions, knowing she needed to stay objective as she stepped forward and took a seat beside the young firefighter.

" Buck?" She asked firmly, waiting for the young man to turn and actually look at her before she spoke.

" What are you doing down here when everyone else is upstairs?"She asked calmly.

Buck's face crumbled for a moment before he forced it into a barely nonchalant smile and shook his head.

" Just didn't feel like meat loaf today." He said with a shrug.

" You absolutely love Meatloaf Mondays, so you wanna try that again Buckaroo?" Athena asked with a knowing look.

She was taken aback for a second when Buck's face crumbled and he barely kept the sobs back. Athena reached out and gripped Buck's shoulder firmly, looking at him questioningly.

" I love it when you call me Buckaroo Athena." Buck said with a strangled little huff tinted with complete despair.

" Okay." Athena said, feeling her own emotions rising but expertly pushing them back as she rubbed Buck's shoulder and continued.

" I love calling you that too, has it been really long since anyone's called you that?" She asked gently.

" Y-Yeah, I can't remember the last time anyone here's really said anything to me that wasn't an order to clean stuff or just yelling at me. Cap doesn't call me Buck anymore and everyone else does the same." Buck said honestly.

Athena felt mortified at hearing this, but she had the sinking feeling that this was just the tip of the iceberg.

" Buck?" Athena said as she let go of Buck's shoulder to cup his face, waiting for him to meet her eyes before she continued.

" Tell me everything that's been going on here, tell me every single thing." She said, her dark eyes like to orbs of hard obsidian and her tone leaving no room for argument.

Taking in a deep breath and knowing that there was no use in fighting Athena Grant of all people, Buck began to speak.

He started by answering Athena's earlier question and revealing that he wasn't exactly welcome at the table for communal meals anymore, that in the beginning he would try to include himself but he would get these looks that questioned why he had the audacity to join them. Chim and Hen would try to include him but Bobby was usually stonefaced and Eddie would just glare at him or outright leave the table saying he wasn't hungry and then everyone would look at Buck with blame. To keep the peace Buck had started eating meals on his own, bringing things from home or Bobby would make him a sandwich without much love in it and he'd eat in seclusion. Today the hurt was just proving to hard to ignore and he had ruined his sandwich to boot.

Once the initial trickle of information started, a great deluge followed as Buck finally spilled everything to Athena.

From how Bobby kept him from nearly every call, made him do all of the chores from cleaning the rigs, organizing the supplies, to even scrubbing the floors and toilet. Whenever he would try to run when there was a call, Bobby would just call out "You're not going on this one Buckley." and whenever he tried to protest in the beginning it was always "My house, my rules." Everyone else just stayed mum, while some of the other fire fighters in the house would snigger and rub it in his face. Hell even Eddie did that to him a whole bunch of times, making snide comments every chance he got and ignoring him the rest of the time.

Buck even revealed that while the team is away and he's back at the firehouse, some of the other firefighters who weren't on the call deliberately did nasty things to make life harder for him here at the station

Hen and Chim talked to him but they kept their walls up, no doubt not wanting him to blab about their personal business again. He just stopped talking all that much in general and kept his head down. Buck hadn't seen Karen and Denny once in these two months, save for the few pictures he sees of them on social media. It's the same with Christopher, Eddie more or less barring him from seeing the little boy he loved so dearly.

Phone calls here and there could never fill the void in Buck's very soul.

Worse still Buck felt he couldn't turn to Maddie or to Athena, not because he felt like they wouldn't hear him out but because he didn't want to cause them any trouble with their significant others, especially not with Bobby riding him so hard.

Athena sat completely horrified by what she was hearing, struck speechless by the sheer level of stupidity and vindictiveness shown not only some of Los Angeles' finest Fire fighters, but her own husband and friends.

Buck was not blameless in the entire fiasco that unfolded but he hadn't done any of it out of spite or malice, he just wanted to get back to the job he loved, and the people he loved even more. It was at that moment that Athena's heart froze dead inside her chest as a long forgotten memory suddenly came to the very forefront of her mind.

A week ago at the hospital, seeing Buck as he was leaving, looking around the corner and seeing the signs for the Oncology department.

No... please no.

" I am so sorry you had to go through this Buck, and that you felt you couldn't come to me or to Maddie but there is something I need to ask you." Athena said, the barest tremor in her voice but her eyes basically boring holes into Buck, meaning she wanted nothing but the truth.

" W-What Athena?" Buck asked quietly, his heart hammering against his sternum.

" What were you doing at the hospital last week? Don't say you weren't there because I was, and I saw you leave." Athena said.

Buck looked like a deer caught in the headlights, he stopped breathing for a moment before he just deflated and let out a small sob. Athena could stand the distance no longer, her instincts as a mother kicking in as she hooked her hand around Buck's neck and pulled him to her. She tucked Buck's head under her chin and wrapped in him a tight hug, hard enough to nearly squeeze the air out of him.

" Tell me what's going on Buckaroo, I am right here, I am not going anywhere." Athena soothed.

Letting out a shaky breath and reaching up to clutch at one of Athena's forearms with his hands, Buck finally spilled the secret he had been holding in and dealing with all by himself for the past week.

A few minutes later...

Everyone was enjoying the variety of pasta dishes Bobby had whipped up for lunch. Bobby sat at the table and looked around, feeling his stomach sink when he saw that a certain blue eyed young man wasn't among them. He caught Eddie's eye and the younger man averted his gaze, actually looking guilty. Hen and Chim soon followed, the beautiful black woman looking like she was about to get up and go get Buck from where ever he had holed himself up. Hen wouldn't get the chance as she spotted an unexpected but familiar face.

" Athena hey." Hen said with a smile, rising up from her seat while the others all turned to wave and greet the seasoned police sergeant and their Captain's wife.

The smiles quickly died though when everyone caught sight of Athena's face. Bobby frowned and quickly rose to his feet.

" Athena, what's going on?" Bobby asked as he stepped forward.

Dark, icy eyes settled on him, making him stop dead in his tracks. For what seemed like a life-age Athena just stared at him and then slowly raked her eyes over everyone else that was sitting at the table, enjoying lunch like it was any other day. Then she resettled her gaze on her husband and finally spoke.

" Oh, a lot is going on here Captain Robert Nash." She said with her voice deathly quiet and her eyes actually seeming to ignite with unbridled fury.

Before she could say anything a shuffling behind her had Athena and everyone else turning to see a pale and lightly trembling Buck making his way up the stairs, wiping futilely at his tears that still stained his cheeks.

" Athena please don't-" Buck said desperately as he made his way to Athena, looking close to shattering.

" No way, I am not gonna let this go on for one moment longer Evan." Athena said before she placed herself between Buck and Bobby and returned her glare at her husband and the other firefighters.

Bobby looked between his wife and his youngest firefighter, utterly confused and concerned. Chim looked just as confused and even a little scared because Athena Grant in a pissed off state was a sight to behold. Hen gazed at Buck and finally saw just how gaunt and utterly awful her friend looked. He had lost weight and he looked just moments away from shattering. Eddie rose to his feet and glared balefully at Buck, pushing down his own concern and letting anger cloud over everything else. With a disgusted snort Eddie stepped forward.

" What Buckley, you go and whine to Athena about how awful we are? Huh?" He seethed, glaring daggers at Buck.

" Don't see any problem with that when all of you have actually been just that Goddamn awful so back the hell up and shut you mouth Diaz." Athena countered, still with that dangerous tone to her voice.

Eddie looked to Athena, part of him wanting to be defiant but he knew better than to go up against the sergeant. He took a step back and went back to glaring at Buck with ever ounce of hostility he was feeling. Behind him and Bobby some of the other firefighters were sending similar looks at Buck, and that just ticked Athena off to a whole other level as she spoke to Bobby.

" What kind of house are you running here Captain?" She asked loudly.

" I don't know what Buckley here told you but rest assured, everyone in this house had been a consummate professional." Bobby said with confidence.

" Oh really?" Athena asked with fake pleasantness as she placed her hands on her hips and tilted her head back a bit.

Hen felt her stomach drop because she knew that as the universal pose of "Boy am I about to Drop a Bomb on you Honey."

" So Johnson over there didn't deliberately spill hot coffee here in the kitchen and order Buck to clean it up while it was still hot as hell?" Athena began, her eyes zeroing in on Johnson, the tall black man flinching and looking guilty when all eyes turned to him.

But Athena wasn't done.

" So Ricciutti standing over there didn't walk all over the floors Buck spent an hour mopping just to make him mop it again, smirking at him while she did it?" She said as her eyes went to a petite brunette female firefighter who's face suddenly flushed red with shame.

" And the piece de resistance, Coleman over there threatening to shove Buck into one of the urinals and throwing a urinal cake at his back hard enough to actually leave a goddamn bruise after he was benched again from a call and you told him to clean the mens room from top to bottom like he's some fucking servant." Athena finished, glaring murderously at Bobby and the mildly rotund, mustached older gentleman who gaze back at her with wide, fearful eyes.

Bobby stood stunned while Eddie's mouth actually hung open. Chim and Hen both rushed forward, wanting to get to Buck to make sure he was alright but stopping in their tracks when Buck flinched at their approach and gazed at them with mistrust in his blue eyes.

" Buck is all of this true?" Bobby asked quietly once the ability to speak returned to him, his expression one of utter disbelief as he took a slow step closer.

Buck eyed him with such wariness it made Bobby's chest physically hurt as the younger man nodded mutely, looking like he was barely holding on to his composure.

" Why didn't you say anything?" Eddie asked, looking genuinely puzzled.

Hearing Eddie's words, seeing the look on his face, Buck finally reached his breaking point as the shaking left him and his eyes were suddenly blazing a thousand times higher than Athena's and his face actually turned an alarming shade of grey as he slowly turned to look at Eddie. Eddie felt his breath actually stutter and the hairs stand on end at the back of his neck Buck just stared at Eddie for several long and uncomfortable moment before he stepped past Athena and stood to full, towering height as he finally spoke.

" Why the hell would I go to you Diaz? So you can tell me to just suck it up and quit whining? Tell me again how the rest of you don't complain about the shit going on in your lives" He asked quietly.

Eddie felt the bottom drop out of his stomach as his own angry words from that day at the grocery store were thrown back at his face with devastating accuracy.

" B-Buck I-" Eddie stuttered and then fell silent, looking absolutely mortified.

" Buck I know that I've been a little hard on you-" Bobby began to say and that just set Athena off before Buck could say anything.

" A little hard? Robert Nash do you have any idea just what what your so called "tough Love" has done not only to Buck but this firehouse as a whole? Look at him, just look at the state he is in. Do you see how baggy his uniform is and how deep the smudges under his eyes are. When was the last time he ate with you all up here? When was the last time he came over for dinner with any of you outside of work?" Athena asked, even though she had a good idea as to the answer herself.

Whatever color was left in Bobby's face drained away, Eddie looked like he was seconds away from being physically ill, Hen already had tears streaming down her face and Chim hung his head looking ready to join her.

" Your attitude and this continued punishment you passed off as a life lesson has made this place dangerous for one of your own men, and the real scumbags in this house took full advantage of the captain and his main team having their heads inserted all the way up their asses." Athena said scathingly as she looked past her husband and his team to the trio of assholes still standing by the dinner table.

Athena was about to go even more off the railed when Buck stepped closer to her and shook his head.

" Please Athena, this is why I didn't tell you and Maddie, I didn't want you ripping Bobby apart in front of everyone. He's still my Captain." Buck said as some of the hardness left his face, replaced by this all consuming despair.

" Buck?" Bobby asked, not really believing what he was hearing and seeing.

Buck turned to Bobby and the tears finally broke free as he spoke.

" I kept hoping that if I apologized enough and just kept my head down and did whatever you asked, you'd see that I was getting what you were trying to teach me, that I would get all of you back eventually because that was all I ever wanted. You guys are the people who matter the most to me because who else besides Maddie do I have?" Buck asked, making everybody's hearts lurch painfully, Bobby's most of all.

" Kid I-" Bobby began to say as he tried to reach out to Buck but he stopped when the young man shrank away and shook his head.

Athen stepped behind Buck, her eyes still hard as she reached out and wrapped her hand around Buck's diminished bicep, squeezing it hard as she spoke only to him.

" We can go Buck, forget about the rest of your shift, I'll take you to Maddie's, I'll take you to Eddie's so you can see Christopher-" She said when Buck cut her off with a heartbreaking look.

" I am not allowed to see Christopher Athena." Buck said before he turned hurt-filled eyes to Eddie.

" I only get to call him every now and then because that is all Eddie will let me do." He explained.

Athena was about to go ballistic when seeing the looks of horrified shock on her husband, Hen, and Chim's faces stopped her. At least they didn't know about this, but it didn't stop her from sending an absolutely disgusted look Eddie's way. Eddie could only look away and feel shame and guilt course through him at his own cruelty towards his best friend, the man he was secretly in love with.

He had wanted to hurt Buck for breaking off contact, for "abandoning" him and Chris, and he had succeeded greatly.

Buck reached up with his other hand and wiped away the tears, composing himself and straightening his spine before he looked to everyone and addressed the members of the firehouse as a whole.

" I know that Johnson, Ricciutti, and Coleman aren't the only ones who can't stand me since I sued the department and Cap, and then I just came waltzing back in here thinking everything would go back to the way it was and it would be sunshine and roses. Well I guess whoever is running the universe was listening to all of you." Buck said cryptically before he turned his pale eyes to Coleman and smiled emptily at the older man, pointing at him as he spoke.

" You all should give a big fat thank you to Coleman over here. If he hadn't thrown that urinal cake so hard and bruised up my back like he did I wouldn't have needed to go to the doctor when it wouldn't heal properly even after I iced it as best I could for days. Guess what you guys? My doctor sent me to the hospital, to go see a specialist and now I am waiting for test results to see whether or not I have fucking leukemia." Buck declared with painful grandeur for all to hear even as his eyes began to fill again.

The moment his words registered, it was like all the air instantly got sucked out of the entire Firehouse.

Hi everyone! This is my first Buddie fic and I hope it is worthy of all of you. The prompt resonated with me profoundly and I hope I gave it a good start. Please feel free to send me any ideas you all might have for Buddie fics. The angstier and more dramatic the better. Enjoy!