He was there. Fighting, as usual. Fighting tooth and nail against hordes of unholy monstrosities without so much as batting an eye. He shot, kicked, punched, and slashed his way through the monsters as they came at him. Geth, krogan, indoctrinated soldiers of every species; he stood fast and cut them down. She knew that only one man was capable of this kind of unwavering resolve and battle prowess: John Shepard.

When the flames came, she tried to come to his aid, to help him.

Useless.

She tried to run forward, but it felt like she was light years away. She watched in horror as her hero, her Commander, was engulfed in flames. He screamed as death finally took hold of him.

Pathetic.

Shepard saw her, and as his face burned away, the wounds cauterizing as the fire licked at the blood, he shouted at her as his eyes glazed over, "THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!"

Disgusting.

…

Tali awoke, shooting upright in her cot with a terrified gasp. It took her a moment to fully realize it had all been another nightmare. She slowly drew her legs to her chest, and began to sob quietly. She had lost him so long ago, almost two years now, but even after so much time, she had just recently gotten over Shepard's death. "I'm sorry," she whispered, "I'm so sorry." She had never told him.

She had never told him how she felt, how when she had first met him in that alley, she had just watched in awe as Shepard vaulted over the crates she had been using as cover, firing his sidearm with deadly precision. He had slid beneath the turian thug, placing a shot in his crotch that drilled right up through the top of his head. Flipping onto his feet, Shepard delivered a powerful kick to the head of the first salarian, shattering his helmet and sending him to the ground. He had then shot the fallen thug in the head while simultaneously throwing his knife into the neck of the other, all in one fluid motion.

She had never told him what she thought of him, how as with each passing day aboard the Normandy, Tali had grown more comfortable with the idea of working with a human crew thanks to him. Everyone was nice to her, and anyone who was mean got a stern telling off and a strong punch to the gut. She had come to admire his ability to control any situation as automatically as waking up in the morning, and led his people as easily as eating his breakfast.

She had never told him that she loved him. For the longest time, she had been unsure, but after the Battle for the Citadel, she was sure of it. But she had kept silent. After all, she had to return to the flotilla and complete her pilgrimage, but she would see him again, right? Then she had stayed on the flotilla, knowing that after his legacy of heroism, Shepard could have anyone he wanted. Why would he choose some little quarian girl he had rescued in a back alley?

She had never told him, and now she wished she had. She had never told him, and now she never could.

Tali got up from her cot, suppressing her tears like she had done almost every day for the past two years. She was heading out to Freedom's Progress soon with a team of marines. Their mission was to locate and retrieve a quarian by the name of Veetor'Nara, who had gone silent recently.

"Shepard would love this mission," Tali muttered ruefully to herself, "'A simple rescue mission,' he'd probably say." She grimaced as she realized he would also have definitely made a joke about her own rescue and "rescuing a second quarian" or something along those lines. Keelah, how she missed him.

Tali collected her equipment, and paused when her hand hovered over her shotgun. A Katana, Shepard had given her that gun as a gift. It even had her name engraved on the side, just to reinforce the fact that it was a gift for her. And a reminder of her lost Commander. She suffered a flashback to the day Shepard had given it to her. Tali had been working in Engineering as usual, when she got a call from Shepard to report to his quarters with no context. She had been terrified that she had done something wrong, and that she would be punished.

She had been overjoyed to discover her Commander smiling away as he finished hand-engraving her name into a brand new shotgun. He had even cracked a joke, "I didn't expect you to get up here so quickly! Should I be worried about the drive core due to a half-finished diagnostic because of my interruption?" She had laughed harder then than she ever had in her life. In part due to the joke, in part due to the absolute reversal of her expectations.

Back in the present, Tali grabbed the gun reluctantly, knowing that she would need it. The only other weapon that she owned was a Predator hand cannon, and requisitioning another shotgun would take far too long. Besides, any other shotgun she could get her hands on here would be much weaker. The ride that followed was long and unpleasant, at least for her. While she waited for any extra information to come her way, Tali daydreamed. She dreamed about a much happier time, back on the Normandy. She did this often.

She remembered how whenever she would walk about the ship, most of the male crewmates would watch her. At first, she had been unable to figure out why, theorizing that it was just because they had never seen a quarian before. But when the staring continued, Tali had found herself in Shepard's quarters, asking him. He was the only human aboard whom she felt comfortable asking.

Shepard had laughed at the question. "What's so funny?" she had asked.

"Tali," Shepard had managed to control his laughter, "They're looking at your rear! Lot's of human guys can't help but look!"

"Oh yeah?" She had responded, embarrassed, "What about you?"

Shepard had just smiled, "Oh, you know, I guess I'm just too distracted by trying to see your face."

Tali's daydreaming was interrupted by Prazza, who was discussing mission information. "This is a human colony," he was saying, "And Tali'Zorah has the most experience with humans. Tali, is there anything you can tell us about what we might find?"

Tali snapped out of her stupor and thought for a moment, "Well, humans can be rather unpredictable if you don't know them." She struggled to describe any human other than Shepard, who would most certainly not be on Freedom's Progress. Finally, she gave up, "You know what? Maybe it's just best if I handle interactions. It's impossible to teach everything you would need to know without real experience. Humans are complicated."

As they landed at the colony, however, this appeared to be a moot point; the entire place was devoid of life. Tali knew that it went without saying, something bad had happened here. As the team began to work their way into the compound, one of the marines shouted. Tali turned to see a group of four bipedal robots walking steadily toward them. At first, Tali did not know what to think of this discovery. But when the mechs started shooting at the marines, she knew exactly what to think.

The team scattered, scrambling for cover. Tali had the most combat experience, and while the others moved in a somewhat panicked fashion, Tali moved instinctively to the guard rail, a solid panel that she guessed would be able to stop incoming small arms fire. Using a new program on her omni-tool, she released a small holographic combat drone that went to attack and distract the mechs. Gritting her teeth, Tali vaulted over the railing, firing her sidearm. Using her small frame to her advantage, she slid between the legs of the lead mech, firing her shotgun, blasting the torso of the robot into oblivion. She used a preset function on her omni-tool to hack the second mech, making it attack the others, then rolled over onto her stomach, picked herself up, and watched with satisfaction as her combat drone and hacked mech fought the remaining two hostiles. The marine squad finally got their bearings, opening fire on the three machines.

When the mechs were destroyed, Tali gave the team a smug look, though she knew they couldn't see it. They regrouped with her, and one asked, "Where did you learn to do that!?"

Tali shrugged, "I may not be Commander Shepard, but serving under him taught me quite a lot." While it pained her inwardly to say his name, it made her feel strangely good. She was no Shepard, to be sure, but she was sure that if he were there then, he would be proud. It felt almost as if she was finally coming to terms with her loss. Strange that combat was what she had needed.

They made their way further into the colony, meeting similar resistance every step of the way. When the flying mechs appeared, Tali knew they were in trouble. At her orders, the team took shelter in a nearby building. Or, at least, they tried to; the door was locked. Tail worked quickly, hacking her way through the door.

"Hurry up!" Prazza shouted at her, firing at the seemingly endless storm of mechs along with the rest of the squad.

"You want to trade jobs, Prazza!?" Tali shouted back, surprised at her own attitude, "I didn't think so!" Maybe Shepard had rubbed off on her more than she had realized. She had not seen combat for nearly two years, so she didn't find it surprising that she was only recognizing this now. The lock turned green, and the door hissed open. "Get inside!" Tali shouted, sending deadly blasts from her shotgun into the air at the flying drones to cover the marines.

When everyone was inside, Tali locked the door once again by frying the circuit board. Only a skilled individual would be able to get through. More importantly, the mechs could not. Tali turned to the room, observing the rest of the team.

"Well," she said dryly, "this could have gone better."

"Better!?" Prazza exploded, hotheaded as always, "This mission just went to shit! How are we going to get out of here with those damned machines blocking the way to our ship!?"

Tali did her best to remain calm. What would Shepard do? He always had a plan for these situations. She took a deep breath, "We dig in," Tali said firmly, "Wait for a gap, or maybe another team. This was a human colony, so there's bound to be a team to investigate the absence of its inhabitants. You saw how empty this place is."

"Yeah? And how do we get a human team to help us?"

Tali sighed heavily, "Just... remember what we agreed on, Prazza: let me handle it."

The fiery marine conceded, taking a seat on the couch near the wall. Tali started trying to pull information from the prefab's computer. They would be there a while, might as well make use of the time somehow.

It was almost an hour before the sounds of gunfire reached them from the outside. Everyone tensed slightly, but they knew that they were safe in the prefab. With any luck, the team outside would just pass by, and they could find Veetor after the mechs were dealt with. No one expected the door to open, much less after the sounds of gunfire actually ceased.

The door opened to reveal three humans, wearing what were unmistakably Cerberus colors. Prazza jumped to his feet, drawing his weapon. The humans responded in kind, and soon enough everyone had weapons presented except Tali, who leapt in and pushed Prazza's rifle down. "Prazza!" she scolded, "You said you would let me handle this!"

The two humans in the rear she didn't recognize, and the lead soldier was wearing a helmet that concealed his face. But when he saw her, the lead human seemed to ease, signaling his team to stand down. Did he recognize her from somewhere?

"Who are you?" Tali asked, desiring to know why he seemed to recognize her. The 6'4" human gave a small chuckle, with a voice that sounded shockingly familiar, a voice that she could never misplace. It couldn't be...

"What, Tali," he said as he reached to take off his helmet, "No love for your old Commander?" When the helmet came off, she finally saw his face. It had some strange scars, and he looked unusually tired, but it definitely him, with that unforgettable lopsided smile. Tali couldn't believe her eyes.

"N-no," she stammered, "It-It can't be! Are you..."

"It's really me, Tali," he said warmly, as if he had never died and left her alone for two years, "I'm back."

Tali finally found the one word she had been searching for: "Shepard!?"