My Brother

"Oh, Deputy McCain; how wonderful to see you!"

"Mrs. Bertram," Mark greeted, stepping down from his horse. "How are you doing today?"

"Just fine, thank you. And how is your wife and those sons of yours?"

"Cass and the boys are doing fine."

"Now, let's see... your youngest just had a birthday, didn't he?"

"Yes ma'am. We celebrated Matthew's second birthday this last weekend."

"Oh, it's such a special time when they're little. You enjoy it while you can, young man!"

"I am," Mark answered with a smile. "...Ethan been by this last week?"

"Oh, no, he had some big important job to do... told me last week he wouldn't be able to come see me for a while."

"Sorry to hear that."

"Won't you come in for some coffee?"

"I would like to, but I got held up this afternoon and am running late. Cassie's probably worried as it is; I was due home almost an hour ago."

"Well land sakes, what are you doing here then?"

"Just wanted to make sure everything was alright."

"Thank you, Deputy, but I can take care of myself just fine. You get on home to your family!"

"Yes ma'am," Mark chuckled, again mounting up. "Have a good week."

"You too!"

Mark headed back to town and stopped at the office to report to Jack before heading home. He quickly took care of Sergeant before heading inside, surprised to find the kitchen empty, but hearing his sons' playful screams from the sitting room. Stepping through the door, Mark saw Daniel and Matthew chasing each other around the messy front room. His smile faded, however, when he saw his wife sitting on the couch, blankly staring at them.

"...Cass?"

"Papa!"

"Papa!"

Mark knelt down as his boys ran to him, welcoming them into a hug.

"Papa, you're late," Daniel informed.

"I know, I'm sorry. I had to help the Tuckers round up some missing live stock. You already eat?"

"No, Mama said we had to wait for you."

"Well, let's eat, then! Go ahead and get into your seats, your Ma and I will be right there."

Mark smiled as the boys ran off into the kitchen. He then turned back to his wife, concern shadowing his face as he approached her.

"Cassie, are you alright?"

Cassie jumped as Mark sat down beside her and put a hand on her shoulder. Turning to see her husband, Cassie relaxed, shaking her head.

"Cass, what's wrong?"

"Sorry, I guess I'm just tired. Finish early?"

"Early? Cass, I'm over an hour late."

"...An hour?" Cassie looked at the clock on the fireplace mantel. "I guess I lost track of time. Supper's ready, I kept it on the stove to keep warm."

Cassie started to stand, but Mark took her hand.

"...Are you sure you're alright? You don't seem yourself."

"I'm fine," Cassie assured, giving Mark a kiss. "We better get the boys supper before they starve."

Husband and wife made their way to the kitchen and Mark helped Cassie serve the plates up before saying grace. He then listened as Daniel rambled on about the day, Matthew chiming in and mimicking what he could.

"...And then we saw Miss Grace's baby! He was really small; smaller than Matthew!"

"I'm sure he was. Cass, when did Grace have her baby? I didn't know she was that far along." Mark waited for his wife to reply, but she didn't. "...Cassie?"

Suddenly hearing her name, Cassie looked up at her husband.

"Sorry, what?"

"...I asked when Grace had her baby."

"Oh... just yesterday. Rose told me this morning."

"Was she early?"

"A few weeks, but she thinks she might have miscounted."

"Miscounted?" Daniel asked.

"...When you have a baby, you count the weeks until it's born," Mark explained. "Sometimes the mother counts wrong so the baby comes earlier or later than she thought it would."

"Oh. Mama, why don't you start counting? Then you can have a baby!"

Mark watched as his wife struggled to answer their son. Tears began to well in Cassie's eyes before she suddenly stood and left the kitchen; tears falling down her cheeks.

"...Papa was I bad?"

Mark was torn; he wanted to go after his wife, but he knew that for the time being he needed to stay with his sons.

"No... no, Daniel. It's just... your Mama would like very much to have another baby, but... some things have happened so she hasn't been able to and... and that makes her very sad."

"I'm sorry... can I give Mama a hug and make her feel better?"

"Your... your Ma will be alright, she... she just needs a few minutes. Why don't you go ahead and finish your supper?"

Mark tried to distract the boys for the rest of the evening, not wanting them to worry about Cassie. After supper, he had them play in the kitchen while he cleaned up from the meal, and then had them help him straighten the front room. Later, Mark wrestled with his sons for a while before getting them to settle down for a story. He read them a few books before taking them to their room and putting them to bed.

As Mark was tucking his eldest in, Daniel asked, "Papa, is Mama going to be alright?"

"She will be, Partner. Don't worry."

"I'm sorry I made her sad."

"It wasn't you that made her sad... she was just... just wishing she could have a baby."

"Will she ever have a baby?"

"I... I don't know."

"Papa, do you want Mama to have a baby?"

"I do... but no matter what, I'm very thankful that we have you and your brother."

"Papa, I'm glad you're my Papa."

"Me, too, Partner. Me too..."

Mark finished saying goodnight to the boys before walking back out to the front room. He let out a deep sigh before walking to his bedroom door and lightly knocking.

"...Cass, can I come in?"

Mark waited for his wife's reply before entering their bedroom where he found Cassie curled up on the bed, her back to the door. Mark walked to the bed and laid down beside his wife, pulling her into his arms.

"I'm sorry," she cried in a whisper. "I just... I couldn't..."

"Shh... it's alright..."

"I shouldn't have just left you with the boys, I..."

"Cass, I'm their father, I can handle taking care of them for an evening."

"...I didn't mean to just leave, but... I just... all day I've felt like I was going to crack, and..."

"I'm sure seeing Grace with her baby wasn't easy."

"It's... it's more than that, though..."

Mark turned his wife towards him, looking deep into her eyes.

"Tell me, then."

"...Mark... he... he's taken everything away from us. Our home, our family, our baby..."

"Hey, it's going to be alright." Mark put a hand to his wife's cheek, using his thumb to wipe away her tears. "He hasn't taken everything away. We still have a home and family to one day go back to. We still have the boys, and we still have each other. As long as we're together... it's going to be alright."

"...Mark... what if... what if I can't have another baby? What if..."

"That's not for us to worry about." Mark again pulled his wife into his arms, Cassie resting her head against his chest. "I miss our babies, and I hope we can have more children; but if this is our family, that's alright. I love you and the boys more than anything and as long as I have the three of you, I'm happy."

Husband and wife laid there for a long time until Cassie finally broke the silence.

"...Mark, I'm... I'm scared."

"...I am, too. But we will figure this out... we'll get through it. We are getting through it, little by little. Eight months ago, I wouldn't have been able to spend the night at the jail. I wouldn't have been able to leave you and the boys alone all day. You wouldn't have been able to go visit a friend a mile from town. But we're coping, and as long as we don't get too caught up in the past, we'll be alright."

1MC1

Several hours later, Mark woke to the sound of his wife screaming. Lighting the lamp as his wife tried to catch her breath, worry shadowed his face.

"Cass, are you alright?"

Cassie didn't respond, but threw the covers off of herself and ran from the bedroom. Mark followed after her and found Cassie on the back porch, throwing up. He quickly strode to her side and supported her with one hand, holding his wife's hair back with the other.

When the nauseous feeling in her stomach finally subsided, Cassie relaxed, leaning against her husband for support.

"...Are you alright?"

Cassie nodded in reply as Mark helped her walk back to the kitchen. He got her a glass of water to rinse her mouth before helping Cassie sit down at the table.

"You're sure you're alright?"

"...I'm fine... I think my nerves just got shot..." Cassie took in a deep breath before slowly letting it out. She ran her hand through her hair before looking up at her husband. "I'm sorry to have woken you."

"Cass, you don't need to apologize. ...You want to talk about it?"

"...He had you, and the boys... he was..." Cassie shook her head as she rubbed the bridge of her nose. "...He killed Daniel."

Mark reached out and took his wife's hand.

"It's alright... the boys are safe."

"...I know." Cassie again looked up at her husband. "Mark, thank you for moving. ...If we had stayed home... I... I don't... I don't want to know what could have happened."

"There wasn't a question in my mind."

Looking into Mark's eyes, Cassie could tell he was struggling with something.

"...What is it?"

"...I'm just sorry that you have to deal with this. I wish there was something I could do."

"You are doing something, Mark. You being here... you're what's seen me through."

Mark hesitated before replying.

"...Cass, how are you doing with... with wanting to be here?"

"...For you and the boys, Mark, I want to be here."

"Are you still having thoughts?"

"...Sometimes. It's not as bad as it was... but... it... I have them. I just know I couldn't do that to you or the boys."

Mark gently took his wife's hand.

"I love you, Cassie. You mean the world to me. I couldn't ask for a better wife. Don't let him control you like that... all he fed you was lies."

Cassie nodded, taking in a deep breath.

"...I know... it's... it's just hard to escape sometimes. I feel like he's in my head."

"But he can't touch you anymore."

Cassie faintly smiled, putting a hand to her husband's cheek.

"I love you."

"I love you, too."

Mark and Cassie soon left the kitchen, checking on the boys before returning to bed.

Later that morning after breakfast, Mark headed to the jail for the day. As he entered the building, Jack looked up from the desk.

"Well you don't look like you got much sleep last night. Kids keep you up?"

Mark shook his head, taking a seat across from the sheriff and running a hand through his hair.

"Jack, I don't know what to do. I want to help her; I want to protect her from reliving the horrors of what she went through... but I can't. I feel so... helpless."

"...Cassie have a rough night?"

"Daniel started asking about her having another baby at supper... then she woke up from a nightmare so severe it made her sick. By the time we turned back in, she seemed okay, but I couldn't sleep. I know it will take time for her to heal... but I also know that this will always be a part of her. I know she'll never be able to forget what he did to her. I... I feel like such a failure..."

"For what? Not stopping something that was impossible to prevent?"

"For... Jack, I... I know I couldn't have stopped it, but... why can't I help her now? Why does she have to live with this for the rest of her life? Why can't I do something as simple as protect my own family? Why did G..." Mark suddenly stopped.

"Mark?"

"...I'll be back."

"You alright?" Jack asked in concern as he saw the change in the deputy's face.

"No... no, I've got to deal with something."

"Mark?"

"I... I can't..."

Jack watched as the deputy left the office, tears forming in his eyes.

Mark ran down the street to the church before slowing and hesitantly making his way inside. He removed his hat and slowly made his way down the aisle, finally stopping and sitting down in one of the pews.

From the balcony above, Pastor Harden watched as the man broke. Tears streamed down Mark's face as he slipped to his knees and poured his heart out to God. The pastor continued to watch until a peace and calm finally came over the deputy. After several minutes of pure silence, the man Pastor Harden had spent months praying for finally stood and left the building. The pastor lifted his eyes heavenward, giving a prayer of thanks for the healing that hand finally begun in Deputy McCain.

2MC2

A week later, Mark was stoking the fire in the stove at the jail when Jack entered the office.

"Well it's about time you got here," Mark teasingly called.

"Yeah, well, I'm afraid I have a favor to ask of you."

"Everything alright?"

"Julie came down with a bad cold and can hardly get out of bed. Would you mind handling things by yourself today?"

"Of course. You want me to take your shift tonight?"

"No, thanks though. Once the boys are in bed I can take over, I just don't want Julie trying to chase them around all day."

"No problem... and good luck," Mark teased.

"Thanks... I'm going to need it."

Mark took care of some things around the office that morning and met the stage before making his rounds. On his way back to the center of town, Mark stopped by the house and was greeted by his sons in the front room.

"Papa," Matthew called.

"Papa, you're home!"

Mark gave his sons a hug as Daniel asked if he could play with them.

"I'm afraid not, I have to get back to the office."

Suddenly hearing his wife cry in pain, Mark ran to the kitchen, the boys close behind.

"Cassie?"

"Mark?" Cassie asked, rubbing her shoulder. "What are you doing home?"

"Never mind me, are you alright?"

"I just tried lifting too much."

"Lifting too much?" Mark asked in confusion, only seeing the butter churn. "What'd you do?"

"Just that cow earlier this morning... I'll be alright."

"The cow... Cassie, did she kick you?"

"I'm fine, it wasn't that bad."

"Let me see," Mark said, stepping to his wife.

"I'll be fine, I just..."

"Let me see."

Reluctantly, Cassie unbuttoned the first few buttons of her blouse and let Mark look at her shoulder.

"Cass... did you do anything for this?"

"I got busy."

Mark shook his head before reaching for the witch hazel in one of the cabinets. Cassie sharply inhaled as Mark started applying the ointment, but then slowly let her breath out.

"If this keeps giving you trouble, I want you to go see Martin."

"Mark, I'm fine, really. ...But thank you."

As Mark finished and started to put the container away, Cassie turned around and buttoned her blouse before giving her husband a kiss.

"Now, just what are you doing home, Deputy McCain? Slacking on your duties?"

"Unfortunately, no. I have the office to myself today... Julie came down sick so Jack is watching the boys. I came by to let you know that I won't be home until late."

"Do you want me to bring some supper down to the office for you?"

"Sounds good." Mark gave Cassie another kiss before turning to his sons. "You boys be good and mind your Ma. I'll see you tomorrow."

"Papa, can't we wait for you?" Daniel asked.

"No, you two need your sleep. But if you're good, we might just be able to fix flapjacks tomorrow morning."

"We'll be good!"

"Good," Matthew called.

"Good." Mark gave his sons a hug. "See you all later."

Mark returned to the office and set about his usual tasks before working on some of the things Jack typically tended to. Becoming lost in reports and packets from Seattle, Mark didn't realize how late it had gotten until Jack finally walked through the door.

"...Boys go down early?"

"No... it is almost nine o'clock."

"Nine?"

"I think I should leave you on your own more often," Jack jested, noticing the stack of completed paperwork.

"No thanks." Mark started collecting his things as Jack sat down at the desk. "How's Julie?"

"Feeling a little better, but she's still pretty congested. Doc Martin gave me some medicine for her, so hopefully that helps."

"Well if you two need anything, let us know."

"Thanks, I will. See you tomorrow."

"Bye."

As Mark left the office, he began to realize how hungry he was and became concerned that his wife hadn't come by. His first thought was that she had come down with something, but then he remembered her shoulder and wondered if it was hurt more than she had let on.

As snow again began to fall, Mark quickened his pace and hurried home. Walking into the front room, the deputy began calling for his wife.

"Cass, I'm ho-"

Mark was interrupted as his boys came running up to him, a finger on their lips.

"Shhhhh!"

"Shhhh!"

"Hey, what are you two doing up?" Mark asked, giving his sons a hug.

"Papa, we have to be quiet," Daniel whispered.

"Why are we whispering?"

"Mama's asleep."

"...Your Ma went to bed with you two still up?"

"No, she's asleep in the kitchen."

"In the kitchen?"

Mark walked to the kitchen door and opened it, finding that his wife had fallen asleep at the table while working on a dress. Stepping back into the front room, Mark asked his sons if they had eaten yet.

"No, and I'm hungry," Daniel answered.

"...You two wait here. Daniel, don't let your brother near the fire."

Mark made his way into the kitchen and quietly got what he needed to make sandwiches before rejoining his sons in the front room. After seeing the boys fed, Mark got his sons ready for bed and put them down before making his way back to the kitchen. Kneeling down beside his wife, Mark gently shook her awake.

"Cass? ...Cass?"

"...Mark? What are you doing home?" Suddenly realizing how dark it was outside, Cassie sat up. "What time is it?"

"Just past nine. Are you feeling alright?"

"...I've just been so tired the last few days," Cassie replied, rubbing her temple. "I... Mark, your supper; I'm so sorry!"

"It's alright, the boys and I had sandwiches. Are you hungry?"

"...No." Cassie shook her head and started to get up. "Mark, I'm sorry, I don't know what-"

"Cass, it's alright." Mark encouraged his wife to stay sitting down and took a seat beside her. "Have you been taking your pills?"

Cassie nodded.

"Martin gave me a new bottle earlier this week. I'm sure it's just from lack of sleep."

"Have you thought about asking him for something to help you sleep?"

"I've tried... it doesn't help."

"...Maybe you should take some time off from the dress shop."

"Mark, I can't do that... Ann and I put together can just barely get everything done."

"If you're this tired, though..."

"I'll be fine, really."

Mark looked at his wife for a long moment before letting out a heavy sigh.

"...Alright. But if this keeps up, I want you to talk to Ann about getting more help."

Cassie nodded in understanding before Mark went on.

"Why don't we hit the sack? We both could use some sleep."

"Sounds good."

3MC3

"Lucas, Milly, thank you for meeting me."

Ben Evans and the McCains sat down as Lucas replied.

"It wasn't a problem... though I will say I was surprised when Lydia brought your note home. Has she been misbehaving?"

"No, not at all. She's actually one of my best behaved students. Her grades, however, do concern me."

"Her grades?" Milly asked in confusion.

"Has she shown you any of her work from this semester?"

"...No, I suppose she hasn't. But when we've asked her about tests, she says they went fine."

"...Fine isn't exactly the word I would use. I had to give her a three for her work last month."

"A three?" Lucas asked. "What is she struggling with?"

"That's just it. I don't think she's struggling with anything. When she answers questions in class, she seems to be comprehending the material quite well. But when it comes to written individual work... she does very little of it and what she does do is done rather poorly. I try to make the students' assignments as engaging as possible, but she has to do the work."

"Well I certainly apologize," Milly stated. "I thought she was doing all of her homework. I'll make sure she gets it all done from now on."

"And we'll talk to her about applying herself in class," Lucas added.

"I'm sure with a little encouragement, her grades will quickly turn around. She was doing quite well last semester... I think the excitement of starting something new has simply begun to wear off. Hopefully we can rekindle that fire."

"Thank you for bringing this to our attention," Lucas offered.

"My pleasure." Ben and the McCains stood, the two men shaking hands. "If there's anything I can do to be of assistance, let me know."

"Thank you. We'll see you in church tomorrow."

"Have a good day."

Lucas and Milly left the schoolhouse and headed to the Osbornes' to pick Lydia up. They thanked Helen for watching her and loaded up in the buckboard before heading home.

"Lydia, we need to talk about your schoolwork," Lucas said as the buckboard bounced down the road. "Mr. Evans says you haven't been doing much of it. Do you want to tell me why?"

"...It's hard, Papa."

"Just because something is difficult, that doesn't mean you have an excuse not to do it. You are a very smart girl, and I know if you tried, you would be able to get it done."

"But I do try, Papa. I like school. It's just... it's hard to do the homework."

"Well from now on, your Mama or I are going to check your homework before you can play. You need to get it done and do it properly."

"...But what if I can't do it?"

"We'll help you, but you can do it and you are going to be the one to do the work, understand?"

"Yes, sir."

"When we get home," Milly began, "I want you to bring me your homework from this weekend so we can look over it together, understand?"

"...Yes, Mama..."

Once the McCains arrived home, Milly sat down at the table with her daughter to find Lydia's homework only partially completed.

"Alright... let's start with your numbers." Milly looked at her daughter's paper and pointed to the first problem. "There are two squares, plus one square. How many squares is that?"

"Three."

"Good. What about this next one?"

Lydia looked at the problem her mother had pointed at, but hesitated to reply.

"How many triangles? If there are two on this side, and two on the other, how many are all together?"

"Two... and two..." Lydia looked down at her fingers before answering, "Four."

"Right. What about this next one?"

Lydia looked at the question for a long time before writing the number two on the paper.

"No, not quite. Try counting again."

Lydia looked at the paper in confusion.

"...But one and one makes two."

"...Yes, but that's not the answer to the question."

"Mama, I don't understand."

"Lydia, it's the same thing as before. How many dots are on each side?"

Lydia looked back down at the paper, then nervously at her mother. Milly let out a heavy sigh and pointed to the group of three dots.

"How many dots are here?"

"...One."

"Keep going."

"What do you mean?"

"Lydia, what comes after one?"

"...Two."

"Then?"

"...Three."

"So how many dots are there?"

"...One."

Milly let out a sigh of frustration as she pointed to the other side of the plus sign.

"How many dots are on this side?"

Tears welling in her eyes, Lydia answered, "...One?"

"Count, Lydia."

"But there's just one," she cried.

"I..." Milly suddenly stopped. Grabbing Lydia's reader, she pointed to a letter and gently asked, "Sweetie, can you tell me what letter that is?"

Lydia looked at it for a long time before shaking her head, tears falling down her cheeks.

"I'm sorry, Mama, I..."

"It's alright." Milly picked Lydia up and set her daughter on her lap before grabbing a clean sheet of paper. "Can you draw me the letter, f?"

Lydia nodded and did as her mother asked. Milly watched as her daughter drew the letter. It was large, but accurate.

"What about... m?"

Milly went through several numbers and letters with her daughter, Lydia correctly writing each one.

"Come with me."

Milly stood and took her daughter's hand before walking across the kitchen to the wood box.

"Can you count how many pieces of wood are in there?"

"...One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve, thirteen, fourteen..." Lydia started to move the wood around so she could see farther inside, but Milly stopped her.

"That's alright, you can stop."

"...Mama, am I in trouble?"

"No, sweetheart. I'm sorry for getting upset. Let's finish working on your homework."

Milly sat back down at the table with Lydia, reading and explaining each problem to her daughter. After they were done, Milly sent Lydia to play in her bedroom before walking out to the barn where she found Lucas working.

"How'd she do?" Lucas asked.

"She did fine... I didn't."

"What do you mean?"

Lucas hung the halter on a hook and walked to his wife.

"Lucas, it's not that she actually has a hard time with the schoolwork. She understands it. I should have realized something was wrong."

"Wrong?"

"I was getting upset because she kept saying there was one dot on the page when there were three. The only thing was, she was right. To her, there was only one dot. I think she needs glasses."

"Glasses?"

"She can write her letters and count just fine, but I don't think she can read what's on the page. She answered everything correctly when I asked her the questions, but if I asked her to look at a problem and solve it, she struggled."

"...That would explain why her grades have been lacking."

"Can we take her to see Andrew before school Monday morning?"

"Why don't we head to town now?"

"Again? Don't you have work to do?"

"The boys can handle it. I think the sooner we get this resolved, the better."

As Milly returned to the house to again bundle Lydia up, Lucas hitched the team. Before long, the family was headed back into town.

"...But I'm not sick," Lydia again stated in confusion. "Why do I have to go to the doctor?"

"I think your eyes might just be a little sick," Milly answered. "Doc will be able to take a look at you and tell us if you need glasses or not."

"Glasses? But I'm not old."

"You don't have to be old to wear glasses," Lucas chuckled. "You've seen Helen wearing her glasses when she reads."

"Oh... why doesn't Mr. Curt go to Doc Burrage? Can he wear glasses instead of that patch?"

"No... that's different," Milly explained.

"Why? Doesn't he have eyes like everybody else?"

Milly looked to Lucas, who shrugged.

"No, Lydia, he doesn't," he answered.

"...He doesn't have an eye under his patch?"

"Unfortunately, no."

"Well why not?"

"I don't know."

"But we don't want you to ask him about it," Milly told her daughter. "That's a very personal matter, understand?"

"Yes ma'am."

When the McCains arrived in town and entered the doctor's office, Alyssa greeted them from the desk.

"Lucas, Milly, Lydia; how are you all today?"

"Fine, thank you," Milly replied.

"My eyes are sick," Lydia said.

"...What?"

"We think Lydia might need glasses," Lucas explained.

"Oh," Alyssa chuckled as Andrew came from the office.

"Well then, why don't we see if we can't help your eyes feel a little better? If you all would come with me, we can get started."

The family followed Andrew to the examination room and Lucas lifted his daughter up onto the table.

"Now, Little Miss McCain," Andrew began, "Can you read those letters for me?"

Lydia looked across the room at the sign Andrew pointed to and nodded.

"E, F, P, T, O... Z, L, P, E, D, P, E... C... F, D."

"Very good." Andrew then reached for a book and handed it to Lydia. "Can you tell me what those letters are?"

Lydia looked at the book for a long moment.

"...F? ...O? ...T...?"

"That's alright," he assured, taking the book back. "Seems your eyes do need a little help."

Andrew walked to a cabinet and looked through a few cases before bringing one back to the table.

"Those are a lot of glasses," Lydia commented.

"Well, there are a lot of different kinds of eyes."

Milly and Lucas watched as Andrew went through several pairs of glasses with Lydia until she could finally read the book cover.

"R, E, P, O, R, T, ...on... D, I, S, E, A, S, E, S, ...of... C, H, I... ch... child... R, E, N."

"Very good. That should make things a lot easier on you."

"Do I have to wear these all the time?"

"No, just when you're reading. But if things start getting blurry again, tell your Ma and Pa, alright?"

"I will."

After the McCains finished at the doctor's office, Lucas suggested they stop at the hotel for lunch.

"Can I show Maddy and Madison my glasses?" Lydia eagerly asked.

"If they're there," Lucas replied.

Lydia took off, running inside the hotel. Milly chuckled, shaking her head.

"Remind you of anyone?" Lucas asked.

"Oh, just a few family members..."

4MC4

One evening, Mark was in bed reading as Cassie sat in front of the mirror, brushing out her hair. The silence of the room was suddenly broken as Mark heard his wife ask him a question.

"...Mark, do you wish my hair was brown?"

Mark looked up from his book, furrowing his brow in confusion.

"...No?"

"...I was just wondering."

Mark turned back to his book, but only read a few more sentences. He looked back up at the mirror and saw the reflection of tears running down his wife's face. Putting the book aside, Mark got up and walked to his wife, resting his hands on her shoulders.

"Cass, what's wrong?"

"Do... do you wish I... I had more... shape?"

"What?" Mark shook his head, wrapping his arms around his wife. "I wouldn't change a thing about you. Why all the questions?"

"I... just..." Cassie tried wiping her tears away as she shook her head. "He..."

"Cass, everything Reaper said to you was conjured up to tear you down. None of it holds any truth. He was being cruel, and he was jealous."

"Jealous? Of what?"

"Jealous that I have such a beautiful, wonderful, amazing wife." Mark gave Cassie a kiss on the cheek. "I love absolutely everything about you."

Mark looked up in the mirror and saw Cassie's eyes drop to the scars that were usually covered by her dress.

"Even the scars. ...They're a symbol of your strength."

"Strength? I've been a blubbering wreck for the last few months, and you think I'm strong?"

"I know you're strong, Cass. Because despite everything that's happened, despite everything you've gone through, you haven't given up; even when you wanted to. You... you've had so much more strength than me through this whole thing."

Cassie turned around and looked up at her husband.

"How can you say that? You're the only reason I've been able to get through this."

"...I've done everything I can to be here for you... but I know... deep down... if you weren't here..." Mark shook his head. "I... I realized the other day how angry I've become. Not just at Reaper... but at the whole situation. But I also realized... most of that was rooted in fear... fear of the unknown. I was afraid of what might happen and was trying to deal with it all on my own. And, like normal... I just dealt with it all by getting angry. ...Which hasn't helped our relationship, and I'm sorry."

"...Mark, no one expects you to deal with this all on your own. This happened to both of us."

"I know... and I'm learning to let go... to open up. But I am sorry for taking so much of that fear and anger out on you... especially these last few months."

"We've both made mistakes. ...Thank you for being there... even when it's hard."

Mark bent down and gave his wife a kiss.

"I love you."

Cassie gave Mark another quick kiss and braided her hair before they both turned in.

The next morning, Mark woke and realized that Cassie was already up. He changed before making his way to the kitchen, where he found his wife sitting at the table, rubbing her temples.

"Cass, you alright?"

Cassie nodded and started to stand, but lost her balance and stumbled. Mark quickly stepped to his wife and grabbed her arm, steadying her before helping her sit back down.

"Are you alright?"

Again, Cassie nodded.

"...I'm going to get Martin."

"No, Mark, please... I'll be fine."

"Cass, the cow was one thing... but something is going on."

"Mark, I don't need to see Martin-"

"You haven't been sleeping well, you've woken up sick multiple times over the last few weeks, you're tired, the headaches are getting worse, and-" Mark stopped as a look of shock crossed his wife's face. "What is it?"

Cassie suddenly started laughing, raising her hand to cover her mouth.

"Why are you laughing?"

Cassie started laughing harder.

"What?"

"Mr. McCain, do you want to think about everything you just listed?"

"...What about it?"

"I don't think it's going to take a doctor to diagnose my problem." Cassie shook her head, still chuckling. "I should have realized..."

"Should have realized what?"

Cassie carefully stood and cupped Mark's face in her hands before giving him a long kiss.

"I guess I am going to need to talk to Ann about getting more help, after all."

"What are you-" Mark suddenly stopped and stared at his wife. "Cass... are you pregnant?"

"I think so," Cassie replied with a smile.

"Well then let's get Martin and-"

"Mark, he's not going to be able to tell us anything that we don't already know. After four, I think I know when I'm pregnant."

"Well then what took you so long to figure it out?" Mark teased, wrapping his arms around his wife and giving her a kiss. Drawing back, Mark saw a tinge of hesitancy in Cassie's eyes. "...Nervous?"

Cassie nodded.

"...I don't want to lose this baby, too..."

"...I want you to take it easy, but worrying about it isn't going to do any good." Mark took his wife's hand and held it to her stomach. "We'll be extra careful; but this is a happy time. A time to be thankful for this miracle."

Cassie wrapped her arms around Mark and rested her head on his shoulder.

"I can't wait to tell the boys..."

"When do you want to?"

"...Just in case, I think we should wait a few weeks. If they know, Rose will know, and if she knows..."

"The whole state will know within the week." Mark chuckled, but suddenly stopped. "Ma and Pa! How are we going to tell them? ...Should we write now or send a wire after we tell the boys?"

"Wouldn't you rather just tell them in person?"

"In pers... Cass, I can't leave you now!"

"Oh yes you can, and you will! I'll be just fine."

"But..."

"I didn't spend months poking myself with a needle just for you to waste those train tickets. Don't worry. Knowing Rose, once she finds out, she probably won't give me a moment's peace."

"...Are you sure?"

"Yes, Mark."

"...Should we wait that long to tell them?"

"Who knows how long it will be until you can share news like this in person again? I think they'll understand."

"...Do you think it's a boy or girl?"

"How should I know?"

"Well, you were right about Matthew."

"Pure luck," Cassie chuckled.

"What if you had to guess?"

Cassie rolled her eyes and thought for a moment.

"I think... it'll be a baby."

Mark shook his head before giving Cassie another kiss.

5MC5

March finally arrived, and Mark was soon telling his family goodbye. After giving the boys one last hug, Mark again turned to his wife.

"Are you sure you're going to be alright?"

"I'll be fine. You go and enjoy yourself."

"If you need anything-"

"Rose is right next door and Julie isn't much farther. I'll be fine."

"If you feel like the slightest thing might be wrong, promise me you'll go see Martin."

"Mark." Cassie grabbed the lapel of Mark's jacket and pulled him close before giving him a kiss. "I love you. I promise, I'll be careful and if I get concerned, I'll go see Doc Martin."

"Thank you."

"Deputy McCain, I have a schedule to keep," the driver called.

Mark gave Cassie one last kiss before climbing up into the stage.

"I'll see you all when I get back. Love you."

As the stage pulled away from the depot, Mark waved to his family until they disappeared from view. Sitting back against his seat, Mark let out a heavy sigh as it all started to hit him.

"I'm going home..."

The next few days seemed to drag by as Mark travelled to New Mexico. His thoughts often stayed on his wife and children, but his excitement continued to build as he got closer to home.

Finally, the train came over one final hill and Mark saw North Fork come into view. A smile played on his face as memories flooded his mind, but he couldn't help but notice something tugging at his heart... something weighing on him that he couldn't identify.

As the train pulled into the station, Mark collected his luggage and rifle before making his way to the platform. He hadn't made it far before he suddenly heard his name being called.

"Mark?!"

Mark turned around to see his uncle making his way towards him.

"Good to see you, Uncle Johnny."

"What are you doing here? Are Cassie and the boys with you?"

"I'm afraid not. I'm just visiting for Pa's birthday."

"Do your folks know you're coming?"

"No, I wanted it to be a surprise."

"Surprise is right! You might just give your Pa a heart attack! We've all missed your family."

"We miss being here. How are Aunt Lou and the kids?"

"Doing fine... why don't you head over to the hotel?"

"...I was kinda hoping to get home."

"Just for a few minutes? Lou is gonna kill me if she finds out I let you leave town without seeing her."

"Alright," Mark chuckled. "Let me borrow a horse from Nils and I'll head right over."

"Sounds good."

Mark headed to the livery, being stopped by several townsfolk along the way. He took a brief moment to greet them and answer their questions before continuing on, eager to get home. Finally entering the stable, Mark called for the liveryman.

"Nils?"

"What can I... Mark?! What are you doing home? I didn't know you were coming!"

"I came to surprise Pa for his birthday."

"It sure is good to see you."

"It's good to be back. Do you have a horse and saddle I can rent for the day? Had to leave Sergeant back home."

"Take your pick, on the house."

"Thanks."

As Mark saddled a horse, he visited with the liveryman before saying goodbye and heading to the hotel. Not seeing anyone in the restaurant or at the front desk, Mark walked back to Lou's office. He knocked on the open door and stepped inside, surprised to see a switch board.

"Well why didn't anyone tell us you got a telephone? We could've been talking this whole time!"

Lou looked up, shock written all over her face.

"Mark?!" Lou walked up to him and greeted the man with a hug. "Oh it's so good to see ya! When did ya get 'ere? Where are Cassie and the boys?"

"Good to see you, too," Mark chuckled. "Just got in a few minutes ago. ...Cass didn't feel comfortable coming back home yet."

"Well ya shoulda told us you were comin'! We coulda had a big-"

"Exactly. I'm here for Pa's birthday, and you know how he feels about making a fuss."

"I just don't understand why."

"To each their own."

"How long are ya stayin'?"

"About a week."

"If you spend all that time at the ranch..."

"Don't worry, I'll come to town a few times to visit everyone else."

"Good."

"I hate to run out on you, but I'm dyin' to see Ma and Pa."

"I understand." Lou gave Mark another hug as she went on, "Oh, it's so good to have ya back!"

"It's good to be here. I'll see you later."

As Mark left the hotel and started to mount up, he heard his brother-in-law's voice behind him.

"No you don't!"

Mark turned around as Ned finished walking up to him and shook the man's hand.

"Ned, good to see you."

"You too, brother. Johnny said you were visiting?"

"Yeah. It's a long story, but Cass sent me out for Pa's birthday."

"It's good to have you back, even just for a little while. How are Cassie and the boys?"

"Doing fine... the boys are growing like weeds."

"...How are you and Cassie doing with everything?"

"...We're still learning to adjust, but we're getting there."

"Glad to hear it. Any news from the men looking for Reaper?"

"...I haven't heard anything for months. I need to call Will and find out what's going on."

"Speaking of which, did you see the telephone in there?"

"Yeah. You should've wired us; we have about half a dozen in Dayton. If we had known the hotel got a telephone, we would've been calling here every week!"

"It's only been there for about a month, but that's good to know. We'll be looking forward to those calls once you get back home."

"You and me both."

"Well, I'm sure you're anxious to get home. But you're coming for dinner sometime before you leave."

"Alright, sounds good."

"See you later!"

Mark mounted up and headed out of town, taking the shortcut to get to the ranch.

As the homestead came into view, Mark's smile grew wider. He quickened the horse's pace and hurried to his parents' home before dismounting. Mark climbed the porch steps and entered the house, chuckling as he saw Micah asleep in the chair.

"Lucas, is that-" Milly stopped short as she came through the kitchen door. "Mark!"

Milly pulled Mark into an embrace, tears in her eyes.

"Good to see you, Ma."

"Oh, Mark! What are you doing here? Why didn't you tell us you were coming?!"

"Well it wouldn't have been much of a surprise if I had told you!"

Micah started to rouse and suddenly realized who was standing in the front room.

"Mark! Boy, welcome home!"

"Thanks, Micah." Mark gave the old man a brief hug before going on. "How are you doing?"

"Fine, fine. How'd you like Chicago?"

"Chicago?"

"...Or was it Denver?"

Mark looked at Milly in confusion. She simply shook her head, her expression indicating that they would talk later.

"...Just fine."

"I'm sure there are plenty of pretty young gals out there," Micah jested with a gleam in his eye.

Mark's brow furrowed, not understanding why Micah would make a joke like that.

"Mark, are you hungry?" Milly asked, trying to change the subject.

"...I could eat."

"We haven't had lunch yet, why don't we head back to the kitchen?"

"...Sure."

Over lunch, Mark, Micah, and Milly enjoyed catching up. Mark, however, was confused by Micah's behavior and some of the jokes he tried to make. After Mark helped his Ma clean up, he said he wanted to ride out to the range.

"Do you happen to know where everyone's working?"

"Well your Pa gave Rees and Isaac the week off," Milly began. "There was some auction and rodeo they wanted to go to, up in Santa Fe. The cattle mated a little later this year, so Lucas thought it would be good for them to get off the ranch before calving season. But I think your Pa said he would be working in the west pasture."

"Milly, I thought he was working more in the northeast corner of the property," Micah commented.

"Micah, we don't run cattle up there," Mark said.

"No, I'm pretty sure that's where your Pa said he was working."

"Micah-"

"Mark," Milly interrupted. "Why don't you check the west pasture first, and if he isn't there, then head the other way?"

"...Alright. I'll see you two later."

Mark gave Milly a hug and a kiss on the cheek before heading outside and mounting up. He had only been riding for about fifteen minutes when he finally saw his Pa off in the distance. Mark slowed his horse and dismounted before walking a ways. He eventually picketed the horse and quietly approached Lucas, who was helping a cow that had gotten tangled in a bush. Finally, Lucas stepped back and shook his head as he watched the cow walk away.

"If I have to get you untangled one more time..."

"You know, they say talking to animals is a sure sign that you've gone crazy."

Lucas suddenly whipped around, shock written all over his face.

"...Mark?"

Without hesitation, Lucas pulled his son into an embrace.

"Pa, I can't tell you how much I've missed you..."

"Mark... I… it's so good to have you home!" Lucas stepped back, putting a hand on his son's shoulder. "Are Cassie and the boys at the house?"

"Sorry to disappoint, but it's just me."

"We'll take what we can get! What are you doing here? How long can you stay?"

"Cassie kicked me out."

"What?"

Mark laughed at his Pa's expression before explaining.

"Just long enough so I could visit you for your birthday. I'm here until Wednesday."

"How is Cassie? And the boys?"

"The boys are doing fine; I can't believe how fast they're growing. Daniel's always asking about you and Ma, and Matthew... he reminds us a lot of you in his stature and how he carries himself."

"...And Cassie?"

Mark let out a heavy sigh.

"...It's been a long few months. I thought... I was wrong in thinking everything would just suddenly be better when we moved. We're both glad we did, but it's brought its own complications and... Cassie and I are both still struggling with some things. But we're getting there."

"...Mark, you're not still blaming yourself, are you?"

Mark shook his head.

"No. I wanted to, but Cass and I both realized early on that we couldn't blame ourselves. ...How are things going with Rees and Isaac?"

"They're still learning, but they're both hard workers. We've been able to handle everything between the three of us. Right now they're up in Santa Fe for a rodeo; figured they could use some time off before all the calves get here."

"Ma was telling me back at the house." Mark hesitated before going on, "...Pa, what's going on with Micah? He was acting... strange."

Lucas let out a heavy sigh.

"...I wasn't sure how to explain it in a letter... and we were... and still are hoping things will change."

"But what's going on? He was asking me if I liked Chicago, making inappropriate comments, insisting you were working on the northeast corner of the property..."

"Mark, Micah had an accident this last summer. He fell from a horse and hit his head, and since then... he's just been... off. Doc can't do anything, he and Andrew both say that between the accident and his age... that it's just the way things are. It comes and goes... but thankfully it's not as bad as it was right after his accident. He didn't remember that Milly and I were married, he was calling Anna, Cassie..."

"Well I don't know if I'd say he's that much better. Based on what he said to me at the house, I don't think he even remembers Cassie."

"...We were just talking about the four of you last night. Like I said... it comes and goes."

"...I understand what your hopes were, but please... keep us informed. Not just with Micah, but anyone in the family. We might not be close enough to help, but we still want to know what's going on."

Lucas nodded in understanding.

"I'm sorry. We will do better."

"Well I think that's going to be a whole lot easier now that the hotel got a telephone."

"You mean you have access to one in Dayton?"

"One? There's probably five or six! If we had known that there was a telephone here, we would've been calling all the time!"

"I still can't wrap my brain around the fact that you can talk to people clear across the country..."

"The wonders of modern invention," Mark chuckled. "So how's Little Miss McCain doing in school?"

"When's the last time you got a letter from her?"

"...About December, why?"

"She mailed another one a few weeks ago telling you about her glasses."

"Lydia had to get glasses?"

"Ben met with us to let us know that her grades were slipping and she wasn't doing her homework properly. We were surprised, considering how well she did first semester. Your Ma sat down to go over Lydia's homework with her later that morning only to realize that Lydia was struggling because she couldn't see what was on the page. So Andrew examined her and gave her a pair of glasses for reading. Since then, she's been doing fine in school."

"I'm glad... I don't know if you could survive putting another me through school."

"Either way, I'm thankful for your Ma. She's much better with helping Lydia with schoolwork than I ever was with you. ...Speaking of school, I've got to go pick up your sister. Want to come?"

"Of course. Let me just trade out my horse so I can take the one I have back to Nils."

After stopping back at the homestead to saddle Storm, Mark joined Lucas on the ride to town. Father and son enjoyed their time together as Mark told Lucas about their life in Washington, and Lucas caught Mark up on what had happened in North Fork. They weren't far from town, however, when Mark changed the subject.

"...Pa, are you alright? I feel like you're holding something back."

"No... not holding back. I was just going to ask you the same question. ...I saw it in your eyes the very moment I turned around, but I can't put my finger on it... and I wasn't sure if I should bring if up. Something's different about you."

Mark nodded in understanding, letting out a deep breath.

"These last few months..." Mark shook his head. "They've been hard, Pa. so much has happened... Cassie and I have been through so many ups and downs... I was just so lost. I did everything I could to be gentle with her, to be understanding, to be patient. But I... I had so much pent up inside. I didn't even realize how angry I was... how scared I was. I've always had you close by. We've always been able to talk everything out. Even when I didn't understand what was going on or what I was feeling, I had you there to help me navigate it all. But when we moved... I didn't have that anymore. I felt like I was dropped into the middle of a cattle stampede, and I felt like I had to try to figure it all out by myself. ...I never realized how much you were always there for me, until you couldn't be there anymore. The circumstances of the last few months have put so much strain on our relationship... and because I was trying to do it all alone, and I had so much going on inside of me... I wasn't always the husband I should have been. I didn't have you to talk sense into me before I blew up at Cassie over something. We had some big fights, but we also had a lot of little fights over the smallest things. We've figured things out, and our marriage is better than it was before this whole thing started... but I still felt so much pressure... I felt like everything was spinning out of control. Cassie's still struggling mentally and emotionally... and it doesn't help that we still don't know where Reaper is..."

"...I'm sorry we couldn't be closer, Son."

"...But as much as we've missed you all... as much as I missed having you around... I'm, in a way, glad you weren't. I needed to deal with some things that I didn't even realize I was struggling with. Because you weren't there, I felt like I had to face everything alone... and I also felt like it was my responsibility to be able to just press forward. I was the husband, I needed to be strong… I felt that I couldn't be vulnerable and that I needed to keep everything together. But one day... a friend of mine asked me if I blamed myself. I didn't, but it was that day that I realized that I was trying to control things I couldn't and that I was angry when I had no right to be."

"...What do you mean?"

"Taking precautions, like moving, is one thing. But I was worried... terrified of Reaper coming back into our lives again... I felt like it was my responsibility to keep that from happening again. But I can't. I was trying to control what I couldn't, and I was angry at myself. Angry at myself for not going after him in Tenton, for not trailing him after Cassie was safe. But I finally remembered why I made those decisions. I needed to help Laura and get back to my family the first time. And there was no way I could've left Cassie in good conscience the second." Mark paused before going on. "...I also wanted to control what Cassie was feeling. I wanted to make her just forget what had happened... but I knew she couldn't. I was angry at Reaper and the situation... but I'm ashamed to say that I think... if I'm being honest... I was... I was angry at Cassie. I had no right to be, she did nothing wrong. ...But I just wanted my wife back. I understood the trauma of what she had gone through... but at the same time... I was angry that I couldn't hold her or even be in the same room with her sometimes. And again, I was angry at myself for not being able to comfort her." Feeling his emotions rising, Mark hesitated before going on. "...And there were some other things... that happened... that I need to talk to you about some other time. ...But that's a whole other conversation. ...I felt like a failure, I felt like a scared little boy, not a man. ...And I felt anger towards God. In the moment that I realized that... I just broke. I had been trying to do it all on my own, too angry to face God to seek help from the only one who could actually control these things. I had blamed God for a man's actions instead of realizing that God was the only reason I got my wife back. She shouldn't have been able to find her way home. Andrew didn't know how she had the strength to make it that far in her condition, primarily on foot, without food and very little, if any water. I realized that I wasn't strong enough to carry the weight of what had happened... and that I wasn't intended to. If you had been there... I don't know if I would have ever come to terms with my anger, or learned to surrender the things that were out of my control. I learned to deal with things, not on my own, but without another man there to help me."

"...Mark, I... I'm... I never would have wished these things upon you and Cassie. If I could go back and change it, I would. ...But as hard as these last few months apart have been... I am glad that you've let yourself learn and grow through this time. And while, yes, those are conclusions you needed to come to, and I'm glad you have come to peace with God... know that he still did give you a father for a reason, and I am here for you."

"I know, Pa. And thanks."

"...So since then, how have you been handling things?"

"A whole lot better. I still have concerns, especially now with..."

"...With?"

"With... just how... the... the dynamics of our family have changed. But I don't feel as much pressure or stress as I did before. I wish I didn't have to spend so much time away from home, especially having to take the night watch half the week, but we make time to spend together as a family. And Rose, our neighbor..." Mark chuckled. "She's a God send. She'll take the boys every once and a while so Cassie and I can have some time alone."

"...How's Cassie doing with the idea of you being gone for so long?"

"Like I said, she's the one that kicked me out," Mark jokingly replied. "...We both had a little bit of apprehension... but I think I was a lot more nervous than she was. Though after what I did, I'm surprised I'm still here."

"What do you mean?"

Mark let out a slight sigh of embarrassment before explaining how he had thought something was going on between Cassie and Jack. By the time he finished recounting the story, Lucas was laughing as they rode into the school yard.

"I was lucky Jack didn't fire me."

"I'm sure Cassie gave you an earful when you finally came around."

"Not really. She was gracious about the whole thing... they both were. Though I did plenty of apologizing."

"Sounds like you learned a valuable lesson."

"That I did..."

"MARK!"

Lucas and Mark turned to see Lydia running down the steps and towards her brother. Mark dismounted just before Lydia reached him, picking her up and giving her a big hug.

"You're home! When did you get home?!"

"Oh, just a few hours ago."

"Papa, did you know Mark was coming home?"

"No," Lucas chuckled.

"Mark, did you miss me?"

"Miss you? Of course I did! How could I not miss my sister?"

"Is Cassie at home?"

"No, she had to stay back in Washington with the boys."

"Oh... so you're leaving again?"

"I'm afraid so... but not for a week. We'll get to spend plenty of time together before I have to go." Mark set his sister up in his saddle before mounting up behind her. "So I hear someone got glasses."

"Oh, I..." Lydia stopped and looked at Mark, then Lucas. "I forgot them inside..."

Mark chuckled and helped his sister back down before she ran back into the school.

"There's no doubt she's my sister..."

"I don't know what you're talking about," Lucas teased. "You never forget anything!"

6MC6

That night, Mark helped his Pa with the evening chores. As they finished up in the second barn, Mark fed BlueBoy a sugar cube and spent a few extra minutes brushing down his horse. Stepping out of BlueBoy's stall, Mark saw Lucas heading for the barn door.

"...Pa, can we talk before we head back in?"

Lucas stopped and turned around, nodding before sitting down on a hay bale as Mark took a seat on the milking stool.

"...Can I assume this is that 'other conversation' you mentioned earlier?"

Mark nodded, letting out a deep sigh.

"...Jack has been a good friend, and I've been able to talk to him about some of what's happened, but this... this is different. And Cassie... one day we'll be able to talk about it, but right now I don't want to put any pressure on her. ...Like I said... I've learned to let go... a lot. And while I... I've accepted the fact that I can't change or control this... there are some things... I just can't keep this inside. I need to be able to tell someone."

"There's no shame in that, Son," Lucas answered, seeing the tears well in Mark's eyes. "I can't tell you how many hours I used to spend in Micah's office, talking through things."

"...When I said that the last few months have been hard... I don't know if a bigger understatement could be made."

"Mark, what you and Cassie have gone through... I can't imagine what dealing with that has been like for you. A man coming in here, taking your wife, nearly... nearly beating her to death..."

"It's so much more than that though, Pa. Cassie has to relive that over and over again. And not only that, but she started having nightmares that I was Reaper, that I... that I was trying to kill her. She's watched him kill the boys, kill me. ...Yes, they're 'only' nightmares, but... we..."

"Constant flashbacks, nightmares... they warp your mind. I understand that they're not 'only' nightmares. ...I'm sure she feels like he's in her head."

Mark nodded.

"I wish there was a way that I could help her... but I know I can't."

"It just takes time."

"...But that's what scares me."

"What do you mean?"

"Pa, Cassie... after Cassie came home... I think it was one of the times she had a break down... she said that while he had her, she... she just wanted to... to die. It broke my heart. ...But what was even harder..." Tears streamed down Mark's face as he struggled to go on. "...Was several months later... when... when I found out that she... she wished... Pa, the flashbacks were so intense... he had broken her so much... she still didn't... didn't want to be alive."

"Mark..." Lucas walked to his son and sat down beside him, putting a strong hand on his shoulder.

"Pa, my wife wanted to die," Mark cried. "She wanted to kill herself!"

Fighting his own tears, Lucas wrapped his arm around Mark and pulled him close.

"...I can't tell you how hard it was for me to leave for work every day. I... I was afraid that I'd come home to..." Mark couldn't say it; he simply shook his head. "If it hadn't been for the boys, I... I don't know if... if she would even be alive right now..."

Mark held his head in his hands, trying to stop the tears.

"But she is, Mark... she is..."

"I thank God that she's willing to talk about it, but... she still has to battle the thoughts. I... I don't think she's a danger to herself anymore, but... to think... all that time... and I didn't realize... my own wife..."

"It's not your fault, Mark."

"I... I know... but Pa, I... Pa I hurt for her!" Mark looked up at Lucas; tears steadily running down his cheeks. "I'd give anything to take her place! Why... why Cassie? Why does she have to pay the price for other people's selfishness?"

"I don't know, Mark. And it's going to be hard as you two continue to work through this. But like you said, one day you'll be able to talk to her about it. One day this will all be in the past. One day, it won't cause the pain it does now."

Mark and Lucas sat in the barn for a long time as Mark released the emotions he had kept pent up for so long. Lucas didn't say much; Mark knew all the answers, he didn't need a lecture. Mark simply needed someone who would listen, someone who would understand, and someone that would give him a shoulder to cry on.

Quite some time later, Mark finally composed himself and looked up at Lucas.

"...Thanks, Pa."

"I love you, Son."

Mark and Lucas headed back to the house, sitting down at the kitchen table where they continued to talk about family and the struggles of being a father and husband. Lucas waited for Mark to bring up losing the baby before asking about it.

"...How are you and Cassie handling the miscarriage?"

"...It was a long road... but we're doing alright. I felt horrible that she had carried that burden so long by herself..."

"Have you two been able to accept it?"

"There were a lot of emotions we went through, but with time, we both did. It still hurts, just like the first one, but... we know there's nothing we can do to change what happened."

"I'm sorry your Ma and I couldn't be there with you."

"Well that's certainly not your fault."

"Lydia's finally asleep," Milly called as she entered the kitchen. Seeing the look on the men's faces, she asked, "I'm sorry, am I interrupting something?"

"No, Ma... in fact, I'm glad you're here." Mark waited for Milly to sit down before he went on. "Pa and I were just talking about the miscarriage. ...There's always going to be two people missing from our family, but Cass and I are continually learning how to better cope with it. She wanted me to give this to the two of you while I was here."

Mark reached into his jacket pocket and handed Lucas an envelope. He opened it and read the note aloud.

"Dear Uncle Lucas and Aunt Milly,

I wanted to take some time to thank you for the encouragement you've been to Mark and me through this difficult time. It has been a long year for all of us, but we have been able to get through it and your love and support is part of what has helped us do just that. Thank you both for always being there, even when it has to be through letters and telegrams.

The children and I miss you a great deal and look forward to the day when we all finally get to come home. Daniel especially misses reading with Grandpa and making cookies with Grandma. Matthew still perks up whenever we mention you. While we continue to tell the boys that we don't know when we'll be able to come home, we do hope that our return is sometime in the near future, especially with some of the "problems" I've been having. Regardless of when that does happen, we are hoping these issues subside in the next few months. Daniel asked to draw you a picture, so I included his drawing of our family.

Thank you again for all of your love, prayers, and support.

Love and miss you both,

Cassie"

"Problems, Mark?" Lucas asked in concern. "Why didn't you say anything before?"

"...Look at Daniel's drawing; I think it'll explain a thing or two."

Lucas set the letter aside and he and Milly looked at the drawing in confusion. They saw Mark, Cassie, and the children.

"I still don't understand..."

"Five?" Milly looked up at Mark. "Cassie's expecting?!"

A huge grin swept across Mark's face.

"Yep."

"Family dynamics," Lucas mused before giving Mark a hug. "Congratulations!"

"Just why didn't you wire?!" Milly demanded.

"Because then I'd miss your reaction!"

Milly gave her son a hug as she asked when Cassie was due.

"September."

"Are the boys excited?" Lucas asked.

"Daniel's ecstatic; Matthew doesn't quite seem so sure about the whole thing."

"I'm sure he'll make a fine big brother."

"Mark, I wish you would have told us, I could have started some blankets to send home with you," Milly said.

"I think we'll be alright. We just told our friends back home and Cassie already has more things than she knows what to do with."

"Well I'm still sending one!"

"I'm sure she'll appreciate it."

"Do either of you have a feeling about what it'll be?" Lucas asked.

"Cassie refuses to say... I think she's trying to not get her hopes up too high for a girl. I mean, she'll be happy either way, but she wants a daughter at some point. I kind of think it's a girl, but that's what I said last time."

"Have you told anyone else?" Milly asked.

"No one from around here. I was going to announce it on Sunday at dinner."

"You better wait to tell your sister, then," Lucas commented. "If she knows, the whole church will know before Reverend Graft starts his sermon."

"Why do you think I waited so long to tell you? I couldn't wait for Lydia to get to bed!"

7MC7

Hearing a ruckus in the schoolyard, Ben Evans got up from his desk and made his way outside to see a crowd of children circled around two students wrestling in the mud. Making his way through the group of onlookers, the teacher was surprised to see Lydia McCain fighting with Tommy Williams.

"Lydia, Tommy, that's enough!" Ben reached down to separate the two students who were still struggling against each other. "I said that's enough!"

A firm hand on Lydia's arm and the other grabbing Tommy's collar, Ben held the two children away from each other.

"Just what is going on here?"

Lydia and Tommy simply glared at each other without saying anything. Ben turned to the surrounding students, who remained silent.

"Michael?"

"I... I don't know. I was over there when it started," his son answered, pointing.

"Alright. Tommy, Lydia, go inside and sit down at your desks." Both children started walking towards the schoolhouse as Ben went on. "And the rest of you know better than to encourage fighting. Lunch will be cut ten minutes short today."

As Ben turned to walk back to the building, the students let out a unified moan. After heading inside, Ben walked to his desk and sat on the edge of it, crossing his arms.

"Now, which one of you wants to tell me why you were fighting?"

Ben looked to Tommy, then Lydia, surprised that the young McCain didn't say anything.

"Very well then. You both know that fighting for any reason is not acceptable. You'll spend the remainder of your lunch break today writing sentences."

"What sentences?" Lydia asked.

"I will not fight."

"But I don't know how to write all those words."

"Don't worry, I'll write it out so you can copy the letters."

Ben set the students to their tasks before returning to the papers he had been grading.

After school was dismissed, Ben called to Tommy and Lydia before they could get up from their seats.

"I want you two to stay here and work on your sentences until your parents come to pick you up."

They both sighed and nodded, grabbing their writing tablets and getting to work.

Ten minutes later, Ben heard a voice and looked up to see Mark standing behind his sister.

"What trouble did you get yourself into?"

When Lydia didn't reply, Mark looked up at Ben and made his way to the desk.

"Mark, I heard you were in town; welcome back."

"Thanks. ...She have to stay late?"

"No, I just told them to work on sentences until their parents came for them. Are your folks out there, or is it just you?"

"Just me. What happened?"

"I'm not exactly sure. I heard fighting during lunch and made my way outside to see Lydia and Tommy wrestling. No one would say what had happened."

Mark let out a heavy sigh, shaking his head.

"Well I'm sorry. I'll let Ma and Pa know."

"Thanks."

"See you later."

"Bye, Mark."

Mark walked back to his sister's desk and told her to get her things together. They walked outside and Mark helped Lydia into the saddle before mounting up behind her. He then turned his horse around and dug his heels into the horse's flanks, headed for home.

"So, do you want to tell me what happened?"

"No," Lydia shortly replied.

"Hey, since when did I become the bad guy? I just want to help."

Lydia didn't respond.

"Come on, Lydia. You're going to have to tell Ma and Pa, anyway."

"No I don't. And I don't have to talk to you."

Shocked by his sister's response, Mark furrowed his brow in confusion.

"Don't tell me you're mad at me because I'm leaving again."

"It doesn't matter! I don't care!"

Mark waited a short while before trying to coax his sister into conversation, but she ignored him and refused to respond.

As soon as they arrived home and Mark helped Lydia down from the horse, she ran inside, slamming the door behind her. After letting his horse out in the corral, Mark headed inside to find his Ma trying to talk Lydia out of her bedroom.

"She lock it?" Mark asked in surprise.

Milly nodded as she asked, "What happened?"

"I don't know. She got in trouble for fighting at school and wouldn't talk to me on the way home."

"Fighting? Lydia?"

"Ben said she was out in the schoolyard during lunch, fighting with one of the boys."

"Over what?"

"No one would say. ...Isn't there a key for that lock?"

"I'm sure it's somewhere around here."

Mark and Milly spent quite a while searching cabinets and drawers for the key, but couldn't find it.

"Do you want me to take the handle off?" Mark asked.

"No... we'll just wait for your father to get home. Speaking of which, I need to get supper started."

"Can I give you a hand?"

"Thank you."

Mother and son set to making supper, Micah joining them in the kitchen a short while later. It was nearing five-thirty and supper was simmering on the stove when Lucas got back from a long day on the range.

"Mark, you missed all the fun," Lucas jokingly said.

Seeing his Pa's mud-covered jeans, Mark asked, "Couple cows get bogged down?"

"Just a few," he laughed before giving his wife a kiss. "Supper sure smells good."

"It'll be ready in about ten minutes."

"I better get cleaned up then."

"After you do, would you please try to get Lydia to come out of her room?"

"Come out of her room?"

"She locked herself in and we can't find the key."

"What happened?"

"I don't know. As soon as she got home she stormed to her room and locked herself inside."

"Mark, did she seem alright when you picked her up?"

"No... she got in trouble for fighting at school and wouldn't tell me about it. Practically ignored me the whole way home."

"Lydia? Fighting? With who?"

"Tommy Williams," he answered. "Ben said no one would say what they were fighting over."

Lucas let out a heavy sigh before shaking his head.

"I'll talk to her..."

After changing and washing up, Lucas made his way to his daughter's bedroom door and knocked on it.

"Lydia, can you open the door, please?"

No answer came.

"Lydia..." Lucas tried the doorknob, and was surprised to find that it freely turned. He stepped inside his daughter's bedroom, only to find it empty. "Lydia?!"

Hearing the concern in Lucas's voice, Milly, Micah, and Mark came running from the kitchen.

"Lucas?" Milly worriedly asked.

"She's gone."

"Gone, Lucas-boy?"

Lucas checked under the bed and in the closet before hurrying out to the front room.

"Mark, will you check your house?"

"Sure, Pa."

As the others looked around Lucas and Milly's, Mark ran next door, calling for his sister. He searched the house and the barn, but didn't find anything. Crossing the yard, Mark saw his Pa coming from the other barn.

"Find her?" Mark asked.

"No. She couldn't have gotten far; let's get the horses."

Within a few minutes, Lucas and Mark mounted up and started searching the property. As his son headed south, Lucas searched north of the homestead.

When he reached a heavily wooded section of the property, Lucas dismounted; carefully surveying the ground for any tracks his daughter might have left behind.

As the minutes turned to hours and the sun continued to set, Lucas began to worry. Even if she wanted to, Lydia couldn't find her way back home in the dark. And besides the simple possibilities of her falling down a gully or canyon, cougars were no stranger to that part of New Mexico.

As the last bit of sunlight began to fade, Lucas realized that the moon wasn't going to provide enough light for him to continue his search. Reluctantly, Lucas headed back to the homestead; hoping that Mark and Lydia were there.

When Lucas rode up to the house, Milly came running onto the porch.

"Any sign of her?"

"No, I'm going to get a lantern and head back out."

Milly briefly stepped inside before returning with a lantern and handing it to her husband.

"Mark already came by for one... he hasn't seen anything."

"We'll find her, don't worry."

Milly nodded and Lucas turned Razor around before kicking him into a lope.

Again, the minutes dragged by as Lucas continued searching for his daughter. He called to her over and over again, pushing away the memories of when Mark had been kidnapped.

Two hours later, Lucas felt his horse stumble before the rancher fell to the ground, landing on his shoulder. He groaned in pain, rubbing the injury for a moment before getting up and checking his horse, who had thrown a shoe.

Sighing in frustration, Lucas grabbed Razor's reins and began the long walk back to the house.

8MC8

"LYDIA!"

Mark listened for a response, but was met by silence. He let out a heavy sigh, growing more and more concerned.

"Where are you?" Mark whispered, wishing he would have tried harder to get his sister to talk that afternoon.

Reaching the end of the property and scanning the canyon below, Mark let out a heavy sigh before turning Storm around. He started to head back towards the homestead, but suddenly realized that he had been looking in all the wrong places. If Lydia was simply hiding, they would have found her in the barn or down by the creek. If she was wanting to run away, Lydia would have headed towards town.

Cutting across the property, Mark made his way to the main road, looking for any sign of his sister. He continued to call for her, giving a few moments between each time, praying for a response.

Mark reached a fork in the road and hesitated before continuing. The trail on the right was the way they normally took to town, but he didn't know if Lydia had taken the right path. Considering how long Lydia had been gone, Mark realized that if she had made it to town, someone would have brought her back home by now. He guided his horse down the other trail, praying he had made the right choice.

As he rode, Mark tried to figure out what had made his sister so upset that she would try to run away. That morning, everything had been fine. The family had laughed all the way through breakfast. She was disappointed when Mark said he couldn't take her to school, but she had seemed fine when he promised to pick her up that afternoon. She hugged everyone goodbye and left with Lucas, a smile on her face. Mark didn't think anything had happened between his Pa and Lydia on the way to town; if that was the case, his Pa wouldn't have asked what was wrong when he got home.

Mark let out a sigh of defeat, shaking his head. Whatever it was, he hoped his sister would decide to go back home and talk to their parents.

Mark again called for his sister, scanning the land around him.

"LYDIA!"

Mark was getting ready to quicken the horse's pace when he suddenly heard something. He listened harder, realizing he could hear quiet cries.

"LYDIA?"

Mark dismounted and grabbed his rifle, following the sound of muffled cries. He walked off the road, into the trees and soon realized the cries were coming from a cave nearby. Mark ran to the mouth of the cave; relief flooding him when he saw his sister huddled in a corner, crying.

Mark knelt down beside his sister and pulled her into his arms.

"Lydia Grace, you had us worried sick! Are you alright?"

"Go away," Lydia sobbed, pushing her brother away.

"No, I'm not going to go away," Mark firmly replied. "Whether you like it or not, I'm your brother and you're stuck with me, so-"

"No you're not!"

"What in the world are you talking about?"

"You're not my brother! You don't love me! No one does!"

"Lydia, you listen and you listen good. I will always, always love you. Ma and Pa love you. I AM your brother and nothing could ever change that."

"You're lying! Everybody lied!"

"Lydia, I don't know what you're talking about. No one lied to you."

"Yes they did! Tommy's Pa said so!"

"What?" Mark looked at his sister in utter confusion. "What does Mr. Williams have to do with this?"

"Tommy said that his Pa said that you aren't my brother! He says we're not a real family! He says Mama ain't your Ma and that Papa is married to someone else!"

"Oh, Lydia..." Mark let out a heavy sigh, shaking his head; surprised his parents hadn't explained this yet. "...Lydia, I need you to listen to me for a minute. Forget what Tommy said and just listen."

"But-"

"If you want me to go away when I'm done explaining, I will."

Lydia slowly nodded, tears still running down her cheeks.

"First of all, you need to know that we ARE a real family. Ma IS my Ma, and you ARE my sister. I don't care what anyone else says."

"Then why did Tommy's Pa say we weren't?"

"...Do you remember your Aunt Catherine?"

"Cassie's Ma?"

"Yep."

Lydia nodded.

"And Miss Ara?"

"Cassie's other Ma?"

"That's right. Cassie has two Mas."

"She was a... adopted."

"...Sort of, I guess. Well, like Cassie, I have two Mas, too. You see, a really long time ago, before either of us were born, before Ma and Pa met, Pa met someone named Margaret Gibbs. She was Uncle Johnny's sister."

"Uncle Johnny has a sister?"

"...He did. See, Pa and Uncle Johnny's sister, they got married and they had a little boy. ...But then Uncle Johnny's sister got real sick and died, like your Aunt Catherine. So Pa packed up and moved."

"What about the boy?"

"...That little boy was me. Pa and me moved all around until we finally came to North Fork. We liked it here... but there was still something missing. Because my first Ma died, I didn't have a mother anymore and Pa... he didn't have a wife. Pa and I lived at the ranch all by ourselves for a long time. But then, Ma moved to town... she wasn't my Ma yet, but I really wanted her to be. It took a long time, but Pa finally got around to asking Ma if she would marry him. And when they got married, Ma was not only agreeing to be Pa's wife, but to be my mother. Then a few years later, Ma found out she was going to have a baby... and I got a little sister named Lydia who I couldn't love any more."

"...So Mama adopted you?"

"...Well, that's not exactly what happened..." Mark realized he didn't need to get into semantics and went on, "But it's basically the same idea. So yeah, she sort of adopted me."

"...But so if Mama is your Ma, and I am your sister, why did Tommy's Pa say we weren't?"

"...I don't know. But no matter what anyone ever says, I want you to know that I love you very, very much and that I will always be your big brother. And if you ever need anything, I'll be here for you."

"...But you live far away now."

"Distance has never stopped a McCain. It doesn't matter how far away we are, because we're connected here," Mark said, tapping on his sister's heart. "...But if you ever do need to talk to me, you can ask Aunt Lou to let you use her telephone at the hotel and give me a call. I'll let her know where you can reach us."

"...Mark?"

"Yeah?"

"...I'm sorry I was mean to you."

Mark smiled and gave his sister a hug.

"I love you."

"...Do you think I'm going to get in trouble?"

"Probably for fighting at school. But as for leaving home, I think once I explain to Ma and Pa why you ran away, they'll be understanding and just give you a long lecture."

"Can we still go fishing tomorrow?"

"That's up to Ma and Pa; I don't know what your punishment for fighting at school will be."

"...Mark, I love you."

"I love you, too."

9MC9

"Lucas, what happened?" Milly asked, seeing her husband rubbing his shoulder as he led Razor by the reins.

"He threw a shoe, and then me."

"Are you alright?"

"I'll be fine. I'm here for a fresh horse."

"Any sign of her?"

"...No. I was hoping Mark had brought her home by now."

Milly shook her head, concern in her eyes.

"...Lucas, it's getting cold..."

"We'll keep looking until we find her. If Mark comes back, ask him to go to town to get help."

Milly nodded as Lucas started towards the barn, but they both looked up when they heard a horse crossing the bridge. As the rider came closer, relief flooded them as they realized it was Mark; Lydia in his arms.

"Oh thank God," Milly cried, Lucas putting his good arm around her.

As Mark rode into the yard, he put his finger to his lips, indicating for his parents to be quiet.

"Is she alright?" Lucas quietly asked.

Mark nodded and dismounted, his sister asleep on his shoulder.

"She's fine, just exhausted," Mark answered in a whisper as he handed Lydia to Milly. Noticing Lucas rubbing his shoulder, Mark asked, "Pa, are you alright?"

"Razor threw me after he lost a shoe."

"I'll take care of the horses."

"Thanks, Son."

By the time Mark had bedded down the stock in both barns and returned to his parents' home, Lucas and Milly were just coming from Lydia's bedroom.

"Where did you find her?" Lucas asked.

"You know that first fork we come to on our way into town?"

Lucas nodded.

"She had taken the left road and settled in a cave not too far from the trail."

"Did she say anything about why she ran away?" Milly asked.

"Yeah," Mark replied before looking to the chair Micah had fallen asleep in. "Why don't we go to the kitchen?"

The three headed to the next room, sitting down at the table.

"Today at school, Tommy Williams told Lydia that his Pa said we weren't really a family."

"Why on earth would he say a thing like that?" Milly asked.

"He probably misunderstood what his Pa said to him... or he was just trying to be mean. Tommy told Lydia that we weren't brother and sister, that you weren't my Ma, and that Pa was married to someone else. That part, I'm sure he misunderstood. Anyway, Lydia got scared and confused, and thought everyone had lied to her. She thought we didn't love her and that what Tommy said was true; that we weren't really a family. ...Pa, I thought Lydia knew that you were married before?"

"...I guess we all just assumed that she picked up on it. I never really thought about sitting down and explaining everything to her... I guess I didn't think there was a need. ...I'm assuming you told her?"

"...Sorry I didn't leave that for you and Ma, but under the circumstances..."

"It's alright," Lucas assured. "How did she respond?"

"Once I explained everything to her, she was fine. She understood that Cass had two mothers, so I think that helped her understand. ...Though one of these days, we're going to have to explain to her what adoption actually is."

Milly let out a quiet chuckle, shaking her head.

"What?" Lucas asked.

"Oh, just when we were first explaining Ara and Catherine to Lydia... and trying to explain adoption. We told her it was taking someone who wasn't part of your family, and making them a part of their family. She asked if Mark adopted Cassie."

Mark laughed along with his mother, a smile crossing Lucas's face. As their laughter quieted, Mark turned to Lucas.

"...Pa, yesterday I had told Lydia that we could go fishing tomorrow. But I also know she was fighting at school today, so I didn't know if her punishment would interfere with that. I understand if it does."

"No... we'll deal with it, but since you're only here for a few days, I don't want to keep her from spending time with you."

Mark nodded before letting out a short laugh.

"Do you remember that time I 'ran away;' when the surveyors were here?"

Lucas nodded, chuckling.

"I sure didn't last very long. I came back to the house... couldn't have been long after you realized I was gone, and spent most of the day up in the hayloft."

"Oh, I know."

"...You did?"

"I had spent all morning looking for you and came back, hoping you were home. I noticed that the ladder to the hayloft had been moved and saw you up there."

"Well why didn't you say something?"

"Because I realized I needed to have a little more faith in my son."

"Faith?" Milly asked.

"Mark thought a couple of surveyors coming through town were up to something. The thing was, he had fallen asleep and I thought he imagined what he had heard. Turns out, he was right. They tried to rob the bank."

"...Pa, what was the hardest thing about raising me?"

"The hardest?" Lucas asked, surprised by the question. He thought a moment before replying. "...I think the hardest thing was trying to be a father and a mother to you... because I couldn't even begin to be what your Ma was. That's what made it hard to let go as you got older... I didn't feel like I had given you everything you needed."

"...Pa, you gave me more than I could ever ask for." Mark hesitated before teasingly adding, "Of course, I wouldn't have complained had you mustered up the courage to propose to Ma about five years sooner..."

"Let's just be thankful he finally did get around to it..."

"You two are acting like this is all my fault! Just who got on a stage and left town?"

"Pa, you should know better than to keep a lady waiting," Mark teased.

"Me, keep HER waiting?"

Everyone laughed, knowing the break had been needed. Mark, Lucas, and Milly continued to visit well into the night, reminiscing about years past. Finally, Mark said he should head to bed.

He stood, giving Milly a hug and a kiss on the cheek.

"Ma, I don't think I've said this for a long time. But thank you for being my Ma. I love you."

"I love you too, Mark," Milly replied, smiling.

"And Pa? ...Thanks for putting up with me and all the scares I gave you."

"You were well worth it. I love you, Son."

"Love you too. Goodnight."

10MC10

The next morning during breakfast, a knock sounded at the front door. Mark offered to answer it and made his way to the front room.

"Morning, Mr. Jackford."

"Mark? What are you doing here?"

"Just visiting. Can I help you with something?"

"Afraid so. I don't know whose cattle did the busting, but that fence between our property lines got knocked down and we've got our cattle on your range and your cattle all over ours."

Mark let out a heavy sigh, shaking his head.

"Thanks for letting us know. We'll be there soon."

"Alright."

As Mark returned to the kitchen, Lucas asked who was at the door.

"Mr. Jackford. Cattle busted through that fence again and he says they're all over the place."

"Let's get going then."

"I... oh, Pa, Razor still needs his shoe fixed."

"I forgot about that... I'll just use a different horse."

"Are you sure? Mr. Jackford and his men and me can handle it until you get back from town."

"No, that's alright. We best get the cattle sorted out as quickly as possible… I'll go into town this evening."

As Mark and Lucas started making their way to the door, Lydia called out.

"...Mark, what about going fishing?"

Mark stopped and let out a heavy sigh before walking over to his sister and kneeling down beside her.

"I'm sorry, but I have to help with the cattle. But I'll try to finish as soon as I can, and maybe we can still go this afternoon. ...If I can't, I promise we'll go after lunch at Aunt Lou's tomorrow. Alright?"

"Okay..."

"Thanks for understanding." Mark ruffled his sister's hair and gave her a kiss on the forehead. "I'll see you later."

Mark and Lucas headed out to the range where they met Oat and his hands. The men set to work, separating and rounding up the cattle. It took hours longer than they had anticipated on account of there being several sections of fence that had been busted through. Finally, the men started repairing the fence line, something else that took much longer than they had thought it would. Finally, Mark and Lucas checked on the rest of the cattle before heading back to the homestead.

It was nearing five o'clock when they arrived home, Lucas heading to the barn to get Razor. After Mark took care of his horse, he headed to the house; Lydia running up to him as soon as he stepped inside.

"Can we go now? Please?"

"Lydia..." Mark rubbed his head before squatting down to his sister's level. "I'm really sorry, but the cattle took a lot longer than I thought it would and I'm exhausted. Why don't we just go tomorrow?"

"But it's still light outside..."

"...Yes, but if we go now, we won't be able to fish very long. If we go tomorrow afternoon, we'll be able to fish for a lot longer, and I'll take you to Miller's Pond. How does that sound?"

"...Alright."

"Why don't we go see what Ma has cooking for supper?"

After church the next day, the McCains made their way to Lou and Johnny's, where Mark was warmly greeted by friends and family. Lunch was far from void of conversation and banter, Mark being the subject of most of the teasing.

"Mark, how's Cassie doing keeping up with the two boys?" Helen asked. "I'm sure by now Matthew is quite active."

"Oh yes," Mark chuckled. "Both the boys can be quite a handful, but she keeps up with them. ...I just hope they give her a break when the baby gets here."

"The ba... the baby? Cassie's expecting?!"

"Due in September," Mark answered with a boyish grin.

The room exploded with congratulations and questions about how Cassie was doing while Lou, of course, gave Mark an earful for not saying anything sooner.

Eventually, friends and family started to take their leave, Lydia asking Mark if they could finally go fishing.

"Just go double check with Ma and Pa. I'll get Storm ready."

Lydia ran to find Lucas, who was talking with Micah and Johnny in the front room.

"Papa, can I go fishing with Mark now, please?"

"Sure. You just listen to everything he tells you."

"I will!"

Lucas chuckled as Lydia ran back out of the room.

"She sure does adore him," Micah commented.

"I was a little worried when she was first born," Lucas admitted. "I didn't know how close they would be, considering the age gap. But they have bonded more than I ever thought they would."

"Mind asking Mark what he did?" Johnny asked with a sigh. "My three have been fighting all week."

"Just give it time," Lucas laughed. "As long as they don't kill each other first, they'll be fine."

An hour later, Lucas drove Micah and Milly home. He took care of the team and did some chores in the barn before the three sat in the front room talking. Milly eventually headed to the kitchen to start supper; Lucas and Micah starting a game of cribbage. A long while later, Milly came back out to the front room.

"Supper's on the table. ...Mark and Lydia back yet?"

"No, but knowing our son, he probably treated Lydia to supper at the hotel. I'm sure they'll be back in a while."

Micah turned in early that night, shortly before a storm rolled in. As the evening drew on, Lucas and Milly sat in the front room, reading. It was nearing nine o'clock when Lucas realized his wife hadn't turned a page in ten minutes.

"Milly, I'm sure they're fine. Mark probably decided to stay in town until the storm passed."

"...I don't like it, Lucas. I have this feeling..."

"...Then if it makes you feel better, as soon as the storm lets up, I'll ride into town to check on them."

"Thank you."

Half an hour later, Milly and Lucas heard horse hooves in the yard. Relieved, Milly ran out onto the porch, only to see Isaac and Rees.

"Aunt Milly," Rees greeted.

"Mrs. McCain."

"...How was your trip?" Milly asked as Lucas walked up behind her.

"Well Rees nearly got himself killed trying to ride a bull," Isaac chuckled. "But it was great."

"...I'll make some coffee."

As Milly turned to go inside, Lucas followed Isaac and Rees to the barn; the rain starting to come down harder.

"Did you two stop in town?"

"Yeah, we stopped at the hotel, hoping the worst of the storm would pass," Isaac began, "But we finally gave up, seeing darker clouds coming."

"Were Mark and Lydia there?"

"Mark?" Rees asked. "Mark's home?"

"He came to visit for a few days… Mark took Lydia fishing this afternoon and... they should have been home by now..."

"...Should we go looking for them?"

Lucas let out a long sigh as he looked out the barn doors.

"No use now... you can hardly see three feet in front of you. We'll just have to wait."

11MC11

"Mark! I got one! I got..." Lydia stopped short as her line snapped. "I don't got one..."

Mark chuckled, shaking his head.

"Here, you take my rod. I have more fishing line in my saddle bag."

Mark exchanged fishing poles with his sister and headed to his horse.

"Mark, why does fishing take so long? Don't the fish want to eat?"

"They do, sometimes it just takes a while for them to find your worm."

As Lydia looked back out over the pond, Mark started to remove the old string from her rod.

"You know, when I was your age, Pa and me-"

Mark was cut short as he felt something hit the back of his head. He fell to the ground, his vision blurring; his ears ringing. He tried to get up and heard his sister scream before everything suddenly went black.

"You leave my brother alone!"

Lydia started to run towards the man that had hit Mark, but suddenly felt someone grab her from behind. She struggled against the strong hands that held her, screaming at the man to let her go.

The man that had knocked Mark unconscious approached Lydia and knelt down in front of her, grabbing her chin and forcing her to look at him.

"Now, I don't want to hurt you, little missy. We just need a little help from your brother."

"Then why did you hurt him?!"

"We just wanted to make sure that he would... cooperate with us. Now, if you behave, we won't hurt either one of you. But if you start calling out or don't do what we tell you... I might just have to hurt your brother some more. Understand?"

Lydia nodded and the man stood, taking her arm.

"Lee, she'll ride in the saddle with me. Throw McCain over his saddle and tie him up."

"You sure we haven't bitten off more than we can chew?"

"Look at him," the man laughed. "Hardly took two knocks to the head to take him out. He won't be any trouble. Especially with her around."

"Whatever you say."

As she was pushed up onto the horse, a frightened Lydia watched as the man called Lee picked Mark up and threw him over the saddle before tying him to the stirrups.

"What... what do you... you want from my brother?" Lydia asked, trying not to cry.

"Oh, don't you worry. We just need him to help us with a little job, then you can go home."

Lee mounted up and took the reins to Mark's horse as the other man mounted up behind Lydia. They rode for hours, Lydia becoming more frightened as her surroundings became less and less familiar.

When they finally arrived at a cabin, the man behind Lydia dismounted and pulled her from the saddle.

"Lee, get him inside."

"Joe, it was hard enough getting him up in the saddle, I'm going to need help carrying him in."

"Fine, just a minute."

Taking Lydia by the arm, Joe walked the girl inside and pushed her into a back room.

"You stay here," he ordered, shutting the door behind him.

The frightened little girl stood there, not knowing what to do. She finally started to look around, only seeing a few pieces of trash on the floor and a single window high above her.

Suddenly, the door again opened and the men walked inside with Mark, dropping him to the floor before tying his hands behind his back. Without saying anything else, the men left and locked the door behind them.

Lydia ran to her brother and tried turning him over. She called to him over and over again as she tried to shake him awake.

"Mark, wake up," Lydia cried. "Please, Mark! Wake up!"

Finally, Lydia realized it was no use. She collapsed onto Mark, sobbing his name.

12MC12

Struggling to regain consciousness, Mark could hear someone calling his name. At first, it sounded distant; but then he realized whoever was calling to him was close.

"Mark? Please open your eyes again," he heard his sister plead.

Finally, Mark was able to open his heavy eyelids; his blurred vision eventually focusing on his sister.

"...Lydia?"

Mark sat up, pain shooting through his head. He tried to put his hands to his head, only to realize that they had been tied behind his back.

"...Lydia, what happened? Where are we?"

"I... I don't know," she cried. "Bad men came and hurt you and... and then... they took us away, a... and..."

"Shh... it's alright. Come here."

Mark gestured for his sister to lay down on his lap. As she curled up beside him, Mark looked around the room; his heart sinking as he realized that the window was much too high for him to reach.

"Lydia, the men, are they still here?"

"I... I don't know..."

"Is the door locked?"

Lydia nodded as tears continued to trickle down her face.

"Mark, I want to go home!"

"I know, it's alright... I'll find a way to get you home. ...What did the men look like?"

"One... one was big, like Papa..."

"Did he have blond hair?" Mark panicked.

"No, he had hair like yours. The other one had hair like me, but he was short."

Mark let out a sigh of relief before asking, "Was there anything else about them you noticed?"

Lydia shook her head.

"Did they say anything to you?"

"They... they said they wanted your help. ...But if that's what they wanted, why didn't they just ask?"

"I don't know. Did they say what they wanted my help with?"

"A... a job... that's all they said."

"...Do you think you could try to untie me?"

"I already tried, while you were sleeping... I... I couldn't do it," Lydia answered as she again burst into tears.

"Shh... it's alright... we'll figure something else out."

While his sister lay crying on his lap, Mark watched through the window as it got darker and darker. He rested his head back against the wall, praying that his parents would realize something was wrong.

Finally, the door opened and two men entered the room. Mark immediately recognized the taller of the two, shock shadowing his face.

"You're supposed to be in jail!"

"And you were supposed to assassinate Prince," Joe Hawz casually replied.

The second man approached Mark and pulled Lydia away from him.

"You get your hands off of her!"

Mark stood and started towards the man, but Hawz grabbed his arm and pulled him back.

"Don't worry, Lee will take good care of her. You and I have some business to attend to."

"I'm not doing anything for you!"

"Well then, you're free to leave any time."

Mark looked over his shoulder in confusion as Hawz started untying him.

"...What are you trying to pull?"

"It's a big deal to kill a man, I understand. Lee grab the girl and let's go."

"She's not going anywhere with you!"

Mark turned around and grabbed Hawz by the collar; a grin spreading across the man's face. Hearing his sister cry in pain, Mark looked over to see Lee twisting her arm behind her back. Mark let go of Hawz and took a step towards Lee, only to hear a gun being cocked behind him. As Mark froze, Lee lessened his grip on Lydia.

"McCain, you have one of two options. You either come with me while Lee takes care of your sister, or you can leave and we'll take care of her... permanently."

"...What do you want from me?"

"Same thing as I wanted last time. Only now, it's not a candidate I need you to assassinate."

"I can't assassinate the governor!"

"You'd rather us take your sister with us while we do it?"

"Why do you need me? If you hadn't stopped to ambush us, you'd be halfway to Santa Fe right now!"

"Because, Mr. McCain, I want to see you pay for every year I had to spend in that lousy prison! You're going to kill Governor Otero and then surrender yourself to the authorities!"

"To the... Hawz, you're crazy if you think I'd-"

"Unless you want to explain to your father why her body was found floating in the Pecos River, I suggest you get outside and mount up."

Mark stared at the man for a long time, realizing that he wasn't bluffing. He turned to his sister, who had tears falling down her face.

"...Lydia, everything's going to be alright. You stay here and do everything he tells you."

"Mark, don't go!"

Lydia ran to her brother and wrapped her arms around his legs. Fighting his own tears, Mark put his hands on Lydia's shoulders and pushed her away from him before kneeling down.

"I need you to be a big girl and to stay here and be good. It'll all be over soon."

"Promise me you'll come back!"

"I... Lydia, I have to take care of something... and then you'll get to go home."

"With you?"

Mark hesitated. He didn't want Lydia to be scared, but he knew that this could be the last time he ever saw her. And he wasn't going to let his last words to her be a lie.

"...I love you."

Mark gave his sister a hug before gently nudging her away.

"Let's go, Hawz."

Mark and Hawz left the room, Lydia frantically calling after Mark as Lee held her back. As they stepped outside, Mark noticed that his rifle was in the scabbard.

"You have one bullet," Hawz said. "And if it winds up anywhere besides Otero's head, no one will ever see your sister again."

"What guarantee do I have that she'll be alright?"

"You don't."

13MC13

For twenty minutes, Mark had been riding beside Hawz; watching, planning, praying. He had one bullet. One shot at getting himself and Lydia both out of this situation alive. Mark said one final prayer for his wife, praying that she would have the strength to go on if he didn't come home.

In one sudden movement, Mark jumped from his horse and grabbed his rifle. He shouldered his weapon and fired, his bullet striking Hawz in the heart. The man fell from his horse and tumbled to the ground, reaching for his gun. Mark dove for cover as Hawz rapidly fired, barely missing his target. Looking up from the ground, Mark watched as Hawz breathed his last breath. He ran to the body and checked for a pulse, but didn't find one. Mark then checked the man's gun, but it was empty. Throwing the weapon aside, Mark again grabbed his rifle and mounted up, racing back to the cabin through the rain.

As Mark ran inside and shouldered his rifle, Lee grabbed Lydia and held him in front of her.

"Let her go," Mark ordered; his voice firm and steady.

"Where's Hawz?"

"Where do you think? And if you don't let her go, you're going to be joining him."

Mark watched as the man slowly began to release his grip on Lydia. Out of nowhere, Lee suddenly grabbed the girl again and threw her across the room.

"Lydia!"

As Lydia's small frame crash against the wall and fell to a heap on the ground, Lee pulled his revolver from its holster and fired, grazing Mark's arm. Turning his rifle around, Mark used the stock to knock the handgun out of Lee's grasp before tackling him to the ground. The men wrestled across the floor, both trying to reach the revolver. Mark had just grabbed the handle of the firearm when he felt a stabbing pain in his abdomen. He looked down and watched as Lee again stabbed him with a knife before pulling it out and throwing it away. Mark lost his grip on the weapon, allowing Lee to reach for it. The man pointed the gun at Mark, but as he pulled the trigger, Mark pushed the barrel away from himself. The weapon discharged, sending a bullet through the window. Mark suddenly turned, placing Lee underneath him. The men continued to struggle over the revolver until it fired one final time, placing a bullet in Lee's chest.

As the man's body went limp, Mark let out a sigh of relief before crawling to his sister, who still lay motionless on the floor. He could see the rise and fall of her chest, but grew concerned when he saw the blood coming from the back of her head.

Fighting the pain that was threatening to send him into unconsciousness again, Mark picked his sister up and carried her outside. He pushed her up into the saddle before painfully mounting up behind her and signaling his horse forward.

Despite the pouring rain, Mark eventually got his bearings. As fast as he could safely go, Mark raced back to the ranch; the minutes dragging by as he prayed that his sister would be alright.

Finally, the homestead came into view. Mark pulled Storm to a stop in front of his parents' home, desperately calling for them.

"MA! PA!"

Within moments, Lucas and Milly came running into the yard.

"Are you alright?" Milly cried.

"Lydia needs Doc," Mark answered, handing his sister to Lucas. "I'll explain later; get her dry and keep her still!"

"Mark, what happened?!" Lucas asked.

Mark didn't answer and turned his horse around before taking off towards town. He knew Storm was spent, but kept urging him on.

"Come on, boy, just a little farther..."

Finally reaching Andrew's, Mark struggled to dismount and climb the porch steps before knocking on the door.

"ANDREW! ANDREW!"

Mark continued to pound on the door until it finally opened.

"Mark, what in the world-"

"Lydia, at the ranch; she hurt her head, I think it's cracked open!"

The doctor nodded and turned to grab his bag.

"Andrew, what's going on?" Alyssa asked, coming down the stairs.

"Lydia McCain has a head injury. I'll be back when I can."

"Go on without me," Mark said as Andrew started out the door. "My horse is spent."

Again, the doctor nodded; running past Mark and heading to the barn.

"Mark, why don't you put your horse in the barn and come into the kitchen to warm up?" Alyssa invited.

"...Thanks."

As Mark turned to take care of his horse, Alyssa shut the door and headed to the kitchen to start some coffee.

A few minutes later, Mark walked inside; the lamps in the kitchen allowing Alyssa to see his injury.

"Mark, what happened?"

Mark eased himself into a chair, holding his hand to his side.

"I got stabbed..."

"You shouldn't have been riding! What were you-"

"Lydia needed Andrew..."

"So do you! I'm running over to get my father-in-law!"

"Alyssa, I-" Mark started to stand, but collapsed to the ground, unconscious.

"Mark!"

Alyssa checked Mark before running to the next street over, thankful to see the lights on in the marshal's office.

Ned looked up as the door opened to see a frantic Alyssa standing in front of him.

"What's wrong?"

"It's Mark! I need your help carrying him to the clinic!"

"Mark?" Ned asked, standing and grabbing his hat. "What happened? Where's Andrew?"

"On the way to the McCains' to tend to Lydia; Mark was stabbed!"

"Stabbed?! But-"

"I'll explain later, just help me get him to the clinic and then go get Doc!"

14MC14

Milly held her daughter as Andrew finished putting in the final stitch.

"Those can come out it a few weeks," the doctor stated, putting his supplies back into his bag.

"Will she be alright?" Milly asked.

"...I'll be able to answer that question more accurately once she wakes. Though by the looks of things, she hit her head quite hard and it could be a while before she comes around. What happened?"

"We don't know," Lucas replied. "Mark took Lydia fishing this afternoon, but they didn't come home when they should've. Mark finally came racing into the yard and handed us Lydia before going to get you."

"I guess we'll have to wait until she comes around to get the whole story."

"Mark said he wasn't coming home?" Milly inquired.

"Not in so many words. He said his horse was spent, and the way he was talking, he sounded exhausted. He probably crashed over at the hotel."

"Andrew, would you like some coffee?" Lucas offered.

"Please."

"Milly?"

Milly nodded in reply before Andrew and Lucas headed back to the kitchen. As Lucas filled the coffee pot with water, he turned to the doctor.

"Is there anything you're not telling us?"

"...I don't want to worry Milly, but you know as well as I do how serious a head injury like that could be. She'll probably be fine, but we need to keep a close eye on her."

Lucas nodded in understanding, letting out a heavy sigh.

For the next several hours, Lucas, Milly, and Andrew visited as they waited for Lydia to come around.

It was nearing two in the morning when a knock suddenly sounded at the door. Lucas rose to answer it, surprised to see Ned standing on the porch.

"Ned, what are you doing here? Come on in out of the rain."

Ned stepped inside and turned to Andrew.

"Your father sent me, he needs you in town."

"...Can it wait? I'd like to be here when Lydia comes around."

"Mark needs surgery and he doesn't think he should do it by lamplight with his eyes."

"Mark?" Lucas asked.

"Surgery?!" Milly cried.

As Andrew started collecting his things, he asked Ned what had happened.

"I don't know; Alyssa just said he had been stabbed."

"Stabbed?" Lucas demanded. "By who?! When?!"

"I don't know any more than what I just told you. Andrew, your father said to hurry."

"I'll be there as fast as I can."

"Milly, I-"

"Go, Lucas."

The three men ran outside, Ned and Andrew mounting up as Lucas ran next door, calling for his nephew as he entered the home.

"Uncle Lucas, what is it?" Rees asked, coming from the bedroom.

"Mr. McCain?"

"Milly's next door with Lydia; we don't know what happened, but she cracked her head open and we're waiting for her to wake up. I want you to go over and sit up with your aunt. If anything happens, ride for me and Doc."

"But where are you going?"

"Mark's in town and needs surgery; I'm heading there with Andrew now."

"Surgery?!" Isaac exclaimed.

"What happened?"

"We don't know. Just stay with Milly and Lydia. Between the two of you, I don't want her left alone!"

Lucas ran back outside and saddled up before racing to town. As he entered the clinic, the rancher saw Alyssa at the desk and asked what had happened.

"I don't know."

"What do you mean you don't know? He was fine when he left the ranch!"

"Lucas, I don't think he was. Mark's lost a lot of blood; Johnny's back there with Andrew and Doc doing a blood transfusion. Mark's been bleeding for hours."

"I thought Ned said Andrew needed to do surgery?!"

"He does, but we want to make sure Mark is strong enough, first. As soon as they're done with this last transfusion, Andrew will start."

Lucas fell back into a chair, running a hand through his hair. The minutes seemed to crawl by as the clock on the wall slowly ticked; each second feeling like an eternity.

After two hours of waiting, Lucas stood as he finally saw Andrew step into the waiting room.

"How is he?"

"He's not out of the woods, but he's made it through the worst of it. His breathing is a bit shallow and rugged, but his pulse is getting stronger."

"What happened?"

"He received two stab wounds; one to his abdomen and the other to his right side. I had to remove his appendix, but thankfully no other organs were majorly injured. We also discovered a bullet wound on his arm, but-"

"He was shot?!"

"It was just a flesh wound. But considering his other injuries, I don't know how on earth he made it home and then all the way to town. Your son is a living miracle."

"Can I see him?"

"He won't wake until at least daybreak, but you're welcome to sit with him. Father and Alyssa will stay here, but..."

"Andrew, I need to relieve Helen. She's been watching the children."

"Alright, go ahead. Lucas, my father will be here incase anything happens, but I want to head back to the ranch to be there when Lydia comes around."

"Thanks, Andrew. What room is Mark in?"

"Four."

Lucas made his way back to his son's room and was greeted by the older Doc Burrage as he entered.

"Don't worry, Luke; he's strong."

Lucas simply nodded as he sat down, taking his son's hand.

"...I'll be in my office if you need anything."

As the door shut behind the doctor, Lucas worriedly looked his son over.

"Oh, Mark... Mark, why didn't you tell me to ride for Andrew? Son, what were you thinking?"

15MC15

It was early Monday morning, and Cassie was in the kitchen making pancakes with Daniel and Matthew. As she handed Matthew a cup of flour to dump into the bowl, her eldest piped up.

"Mama, how long till Papa comes home?"

"He'll be back real late Friday night."

"How long is that?"

"Well, you won't see him until Saturday morning, so five more bedtimes."

"Can't he come home before that?"

"No, he's spending time with your grandparents."

"When Papa gets back home, can we go fishing?"

"Fishing?" Cassie laughed. "Daniel, there's still a foot of snow outside!"

"So?"

"The lake is all frozen over; you can't fish. But when the snow melts I'm sure your Papa will take you fishing."

Cassie started to hand Matthew another cup of flour, but Daniel suddenly called out, "Hey, he got the last one!"

"Then how do you ask nicely?"

"...Mama, can I please do it?"

"Yes, you may."

Though it took twice as long as usual, Cassie enjoyed having her boys help her prepare breakfast. As they were finishing up, a knock sounded at the front door. Cassie picked Matthew up and carried him to the front room, Daniel following behind her.

"Gordon, good morning," Cassie greeted as she opened the door. "What brings you by?"

"Mrs. McCain, I have a call waiting for you back at the office."

"A call? For me? From who?"

"Your father-in-law."

"Uncle Lucas?" Cassie asked in confusion. "Did he say what he needed?"

"No, just asked me to fetch you."

"I'll bundle up the boys and be right over. Thank you."

Cassie quickly got the boys dressed and headed over to the Pinkerton office. Gordon offered to watch the boys in the front room while Cassie took the call.

"...Uncle Lucas?"

"Cassie?"

"Wh... it's good to hear your voice... and happy birthday! Are you all out of town celebrating?"

"Out of town? No, I'm at the hotel. Cassie..."

"The hotel got a telephone? Why didn't anyone tell-"

"Cassie, I need you to listen."

The tone of Lucas's voice worried Cassie as she realized something was terribly wrong.

"...What is it? What happened? Where's Mark?"

"He's stable."

"Stable? What happened?!"

"The truth is, no one knows what happened. Mark took Lydia fishing yesterday and when they finally came home, Lydia's head was cracked open, and Mark... Mark had two stab wounds and a flesh wound."

"A flesh wound? He was shot?!"

Gordon suddenly ran into the back room, concern on his face.

"Mark was shot?"

"It just grazed him," Lucas assured Cassie, who was oblivious to what Gordon had asked.

"But they're both going to be alright, aren't they?" Cassie asked, tears in her voice.

"Andrew and Doc think so, but neither one of them have come around yet. ...Cassie, I'm sorry. I don't want to worry you, but..."

"No, thank you for letting me know. Please, if anything else happens..."

"We'll keep you informed."

"Thank you."

"We love you; tell the boys I said I miss them."

"I... I will. Goodbye..."

"Bye, Cassie..."

After finishing his call, Lucas headed back to the doctor's office, surprised to find Andrew in the waiting room.

"Lydia?"

"She finally came around a few hours ago. She has quite a bit of a headache and threw up a few times, but I think she'll be alright now. I told Milly to keep her in bed for a few days and as still as possible. Give it a week or two, and she'll be back to her old self."

Lucas breathed a sigh of relief before asking if she had told them what had happened.

"I'm afraid right now, she doesn't remember anything after church. ...Whatever did happen will probably come back in bits and pieces over the next few weeks."

The tall rancher nodded, taking in a deep breath and slowly letting it out.

"My father just went back home, I'm going to look Mark over again."

Lucas followed Andrew back to Mark's room and waited as the doctor examined his son. He could see the concern creeping onto Andrew's face and asked what was wrong.

"I would like to see more color in his face by now. His pulse seems a little weaker and his breathing hasn't improved."

"But it's been hours since surgery; shouldn't his pulse only be stronger?"

"...The body doesn't always do what it's supposed to do. ...Lucas, I'm going to watch him for a while. Why don't you get something to eat or go home to see Lydia?"

Lucas hesitated. He wanted to stay with Mark, to be there when he woke; but he also wanted to see his daughter, to see for himself that she was going to be alright.

Seeing the father's struggle, Andrew added, "I'll stay with him the whole time and send someone for you if anything changes. ...But based on his current condition, I think it will be quite a while before he comes around."

"...I'll be back soon."

Taking the shortcut, Lucas headed back to the ranch. As he entered the front room of his home, Milly, Rees, and Isaac all looked up.

"Mark?" Milly asked.

"Still hasn't woken up."

"...Did you send a wire to Cassie?"

"I called her a little while ago. I could tell it hit her hard... but she needed to know. ...Lydia asleep?"

"She's supposed to be, but I doubt it. Have you had breakfast? I can make you something while you go in to see her."

"Sounds good. ...Rees, Isaac, would you mind just checking the cattle today? Make sure none of them have gone into labor?"

"...Sure, Mr. McCain."

"...We'll double check the new fence, too," Rees added.

"Thanks."

Lucas headed to his daughter's bedroom; a smile crossing Lydia's face as she opened her eyes and saw him.

"Papa!"

"Hello, sweetie." Lucas sat down on the bed beside her and put a hand to Lydia's cheek. "How do you feel?"

"...My head hurts."

"I'm sorry. Doc Andrew said your stomach was giving you trouble earlier... is it still upset?"

"No, not anymore. ...Papa, can Mark and me still go fishing?"

"...Lydia, you already went fishing with your brother."

"...I did? When?"

"Yesterday, after church."

"...But we just went to church and... and then... then we were here."

"...Sometimes, when we hurt our heads, it makes us forget some things. ...Doc Andrew said you'll eventually start to remember."

"...Oh. ...Well can Mark and me go fishing again?"

"...We'll have to see. Doc Andrew wants you to rest for a few days."

"But Mark's leaving again! How are we going to go fishing if..."

"Lydia, it's going to be alright... we'll just wait and see."

"...Can Mark at least come and read me stories? He's really good at reading stories."

Lucas let out a heavy sigh, trying to decide how much to tell his daughter.

"Lydia, Mark... Mark can't right now."

"...Mark's always busy..."

"Lydia, if Mark could be here, I'm sure he would be. But... sweetheart... you see... Mark... Mark got hurt. And he has to stay over at the clinic for a while."

"...Mark's hurt?"

"I'm afraid so."

"Is he alright?" Lydia asked, tears welling in her eyes.

"Doc's doing everything he can to make Mark feel better."

"Can... can I go see Mark? I'll help him feel better!"

"I know you want to, but Doc Andrew really doesn't want you to get out of bed for a few days. You might hurt yourself more if you don't rest."

"But..."

Lucas rubbed his thumb across his daughter's cheek, wiping away her tears.

"It's going to be alright. ...I know I'm not as good as Mark, but do you want me to read you a story?"

Lydia agreed, and Lucas grabbed a book before lying down with his daughter and reading to her. It didn't take long for Lydia to fall asleep; Lucas giving her a kiss and quietly slipping out of the bedroom.

After eating and saying goodbye to Milly, Lucas returned to town. As he sat down at his son's bedside, Andrew told Lucas that there had been no change.

The rest of the day dragged by, Andrew kicking Lucas out of the office to get something to eat shortly after seven. The rancher quickly ate at the hotel and updated Lou and Helen before returning to his son's side.

As Andrew headed for the door, he and Lucas both heard a quiet moan. The doctor made his way back to Mark, again checking his pulse.

"Andrew?"

"It's a little stronger."

Andrew gently pushed on the bandage around Mark's arm, causing him to moan.

"Mark, can you hear me?" Lucas hopefully asked.

"He hasn't come that far, yet," Andrew replied. "But I think he's turning a corner for the better."

For the next several hours, Lucas intently watched his son as Mark started to frequently moan and mouth words Lucas couldn't quite make out.

"Son, please wake up," the father pleaded.

The minutes continued to pass as Mark remained unconscious. Finally, Lucas heard his son say something.

"Lydia..."

"What?"

"Lydia... it's going to be alright," Mark mumbled. "Do what he says..."

"Who, Mark?"

"I need you to be a big girl..."

"Lucas?" Andrew called, entering the room.

"He's talking; I think he's remembering."

"I can't lie to her..."

"Lie, Lucas?"

"I don't know what he's saying. Mark, can you hear me? Mark?"

Andrew and Lucas both hopefully waited, but Mark simply quieted again.

"...He's getting closer, Lucas. It shouldn't be that much longer."

"Can't we do something?"

"He'll wake up when his body is ready for him to wake up."

16MC16

"LYDIA!"

Mark bolted upright, a cry of pain immediately escaping his lips as he felt a stabbing sensation in his stomach.

"Easy, Mark, easy..."

Mark felt a firm set of hands pushing him to lie back down.

"No, let go of me!" Mark yelled before again crying out in pain. "Where is she?!"

"Son, it's alright," Lucas assured as Andrew entered the room and began helping him restrain a fighting Mark.

"Mark, you're going to open your stitches!"

"I want to see her! I-"

"Mark!"

Finally recognizing his father's voice, Mark stopped resisting and let the two men push him back down onto the bed.

"...Pa? Pa, where's Lydia? Please tell me she's alright!" A tear fell from Mark's eye as he struggled to control his breathing.

"She's alright, Mark. She's home, safe."

"Home? She- she's home?"

"Mark, calm down and focus on your breathing," Andrew instructed. "Lydia has a concussion, but she's going to be alright."

Mark tried to do what the doctor said, taking several minutes to get his breathing under control; occasionally gasping in pain as Andrew checked his incisions.

"Thankfully you only strained it and didn't tear anything open. No more sudden movements."

Mark nodded, taking in a deep breath and slowly letting it out.

"Mark, what happened?" Lucas asked, only for Andrew to cut in.

"We can discuss that later. Right now, Mark, I need to know how you're feeling... besides like you got stabbed."

"My head... and my stomach..."

"Pain in your stomach or do you feel nauseous?"

"Both."

"There's a bucket nearby if you need it. What about your head?"

"I... I think they pistol whipped me..."

"Does it hurt on the outside, or on the inside?"

"...Both," he again replied.

"Do you think you could try eating something?"

"...I don't know…"

"Alright... I'm going to get some broth from the hotel and see how you handle that. You need to keep your strength up to help you fight any possible infection. You're going to be in quite a bit of pain for a while... don't make it worse by moving around."

As Mark slowly nodded, Lucas asked, "Can't you give him something for the pain?"

"...Not until he's more stable; his heart rate has been all over the place and the medication could interfere. I'll be back in a few minutes."

Lucas watched as the doctor left the room, turning back to his son to see more tears seeping out from underneath his closed eyelids.

"Mark? What's wrong?"

"Pa, it's all my fault... Lydia... I... I thought... I didn't know if I'd ever..."

"Mark, it's alright. Lydia's going to be alright. This isn't your fault."

"Yes it is! I was too tired to take her fishing on Saturday! If I had taken her like I said; none of this would have happened!"

Seeing Mark again starting to struggle to breathe, Lucas put a reassuring hand on Mark's shoulder.

"Son, it's alright. You're both going to be fine. Just relax and tell me what happened."

"Hawz... Hawz came back..."

"Joseph Hawz? He should be in prison!"

"He must... must've broken out. He came back for me; to settle the score. He wanted me to... to kill the governor and go to jail for it. I... I didn't even hear them coming. I was fixing Lydia's line and... and they attacked me. He... Pa, he was going to kill her if I didn't cooperate! I couldn't do anything! If she would have died, it-"

"Mark, don't go there. Lydia is just fine."

"...I... I didn't know what to do. Hawz made me go with him while Lydia stayed at a cabin with the other man. I..." Mark suddenly stopped as he realized what he had done.

"...Mark?"

"I... I killed him... I killed both of them..."

"...Son, you didn't have a choice."

Mark waited a long time before going on.

"...I killed Hawz on the trail and went back to the cabin. The... the other man... he... he had Lydia... he..." Mark shook his head as more tears fell down his face. "Pa, I'm sorry! I should've taken her on Satur-"

"Mark, you listen to me! None of us could possibly know what would have happened if you had taken her fishing on Saturday instead of Sunday. They could have just as easily taken you then as they did the next day. This is NOT your fault and I'm not going to let you sit here and blame yourself!"

"I'm her brother! I should have protected her!"

"You did! And because of that, she's sitting at home, in her own bed, safe!"

"No! Because of me, she got thrown into a wall and could've died!"

"Mark, I..." Lucas slowed and then changed his tone. "...So what you're really saying, is that this is my fault."

"What? Of course not!"

"Oh, really?"

"What are you talking about? I was the one who took her fishing!"

"And I'm the one with the reputation that got you involved with Hawz in the first place."

"What?"

"Don't you remember? You went after Hawz because he had taken me and Milly. Because of MY reputation. If it wasn't for me, you two would have never crossed paths."

"Pa, that's not your fault! Hawz made..."

Lucas nodded as he saw the change in his son's eyes.

"Hawz and his men made their own choices, both times. You weren't the one that attacked yourself, or held your sister hostage, or... or hurt her. You were the one that risked his life to save his sister... and the governor." Lucas again put a hand on his son's shoulder. "Mark, this isn't your fault; do you understand me?"

"...Yes, Pa. But... but Lydia; she will be alright?"

"As long as we can keep her in bed for a few days. I have a feeling she's going to be a bit like her brother and a little difficult to keep in bed."

"Hey, don't blame me," Mark began. "You know exactly where we both get it from."

"...Mark, when you brought Lydia home... why didn't you tell me you had been hurt? I could've ridden for Andrew."

"I... I guess I was trying... trying to punish myself. I... all I could think about... was if Lydia didn't make it... it would be my fault..."

"No, Mark. It would not have been your fault. And no one would have ever blamed you."

Mark slowly nodded.

"And don't you ever do something like that to me again. You could've killed yourself!"

"...I'm sorry, Pa. I... I wasn't thinking straight..."

"...I know. ...Just promise me you won't try to 'punish' yourself like that again."

"...I won't." Mark let out a heavy sigh before going on. "Cassie... does Cassie know?"

"I called her. As soon as Andrew gets back, I'll send her a wire. ...Though I doubt that she'll get it before morning."

"What time is it?"

"Almost two."

"...When you wire her, will you tell her I said I love her? And not to worry?"

"Of course."

"...Pa, thanks for always being here."

"I love you, Son."

"I love you, too."

17MC17

After breakfast that morning, Lucas headed back to the ranch and Andrew again examined Mark. As he finished and took a step back, Mark looked up at him.

"...So what are my chances of catching my train tomorrow?"

"Absolutely not. Your body needs rest, and besides that, you're still going to be in too much pain to be walking around. I might let you go back to the ranch Thursday or Friday, but you won't be traveling until at least Monday."

Mark nodded, letting out a heavy sigh.

"...Andrew, what was the full extent of Lydia's injuries?"

"Besides the concussion and cracking her head, she also had some bruising on her arms and on her back."

"Does she remember?"

"Not yet."

"...But she will?"

"Most likely." Seeing the concern in Mark's eyes, he went on, "But she's a very strong little girl. If anyone could cope with what happened, it's her."

"Andrew, do you have any siblings? I mean, did your mother ever remarry?"

"No, but... there was this one boy who lived close to us, about five years younger than me. His father was abusive and his mother hadn't been seen for years. Being the oldest of four, he didn't have anyone to turn to. I somewhat took him under my wing... and we became close; I felt like he was my little brother. Looked out for him, did everything I could to help. ...So I think to answer your real question, yes, I've felt the responsibility of being a brother. But what happened to Lydia, Mark, wasn't your fault. You did everything you could; you saved her life. She'll most likely eventually remember what happened, and she'll need some time to work through that. But what she'll remember the most is what her big brother was willing to sacrifice to protect her. Don't beat yourself up over something that you had no control over."

"...Thanks, Andrew."

"Now, I've got to go make the rounds, but my father will be in his office. If you need anything, call."

Mark spent the next few days resting at the clinic. After giving a statement to his uncle, Johnny and Curt went back to take care of the bodies.

Friday afternoon, Andrew said Mark could go back to the ranch, but not to climb any stairs. As Lucas was helping Mark out to the buckboard, Mark looked up at Lucas.

"Pa, I want to call Cassie."

"Mark, you're already in enough pain, I don't think walking over-"

"Cassie's going to be worried until she hears from me, and I need to let her and Jack know when I'm coming home. ...And I miss her."

"Alright, but take it slow."

Mark and Lucas headed over to the hotel. As Lou got the call ready, Lucas headed outside to bring the team closer to the hotel.

Mark anxiously waited for several minutes until he finally heard his wife's voice.

"Mark?"

"I can't tell you how good it is to hear your voice..."

"Are you alright?"

"I'm going to be fine."

"What happened?"

"It's a long story... I'll explain when I get home. Are you and the boys doing alright?"

"Missing you, but yes."

"How have you been feeling?"

"...Tired and I haven't had much of an appetite... the nausea has been getting worse. But Rose has been a wonderful help with the boys and taken them several afternoons so I could rest."

"Are the boys behaving?"

Cassie chuckled before replying, "Behaving, but you know how much energy they have."

"Are they with you?"

"No, Rose has them right now."

"Well tell them I said I love them."

"I will. When do you think you can come home?"

"Andrew doesn't want me traveling for a few more days. I'm hoping to leave Monday, as long as everything checks out alright. I should be home Wednesday night or Thursday morning depending on the stage schedules and how much snow is still left."

"How long after that do you think it will be before you can return to the office? Jack was asking about when you were coming back."

"...I don't really know. Andrew said at least three weeks after I get home. I'm hoping it will be sooner, but..."

"But?"

"...Based on the pain I'm in now, I don't know."

"...I'll let him know."

"Thanks. ...Cass, I'm sorry this happened."

"Mark, you don't need to apologize! I'm just thankful that you're going to be alright and will be home soon."

"I'll be back as soon as I can. I miss you and the boys."

"We miss you too. Let us know when you're sure about when you will be headed home."

"I will. I love you."

"Love you too."

"I'll talk to you later."

"Bye, Mark."

As Mark ended the call, Lucas stepped into the office.

"Cassie doing alright?"

"She's not feeling the greatest, but thankfully our neighbor is helping her out with the boys." As Mark replied, he slowly eased himself into a chair.

"I'm sure they're all looking forward to you going back."

"I'm looking forward to being back home."

Lucas nodded before he asked, "Ready to get going?"

"...I need a minute before I try walking again."

"...Should I get Andrew to look you over again?"

"No... I just need to rest for a minute before I put pressure on my injuries again."

"Mark, are you sure you're feeling up to going back to the ranch?"

"I'll be fine."

Mark and Lucas eventually headed out to the buckboard before driving back to the ranch. As Lucas pulled the team to a stop, Mark carefully got down from the buckboard, the tension on his injuries causing a slight groan to escape his lips.

"Mark..."

"I'm fine."

"Mark!"

Lucas and Mark looked up to see Lydia running out of the house. Before Lucas could stop her, Lydia ran into Mark at full speed, giving him a hug. Lucas watched as Mark grimaced in pain before gently returning the hug.

"Well, it looks like you're feeling better." Mark ruffled his sister's hair as he went on, "Are you supposed to be running around?"

"I had to stay in bed all week! Doc Andrew finally said I could get up yesterday. Mark, I made something for you I want you to see!"

Lydia grabbed her brother's hand and started pulling, only for Lucas to intervene.

"Lydia, hold on." Lucas took his daughter's hand and stopped her. "Mark's still hurt, you need to be gentle."

Lydia looked up at Mark, a worried frown crossing her face.

"I'm sorry..."

"It's alright," he replied, taking his sister's hand again. "Now, what did you want to show me?"

As Lucas took care of the team, Lydia and Mark slowly walked inside. As they entered the front room, Milly came from the kitchen.

"Oh, Mark! Welcome home!" Milly started to give him a hug, but Lydia stopped her.

"Mama, Mark's still hurt! We have to be careful!"

"Mark?"

"Lydia, it's alright, I just can't walk real fast." Mark gave Milly a hug before sitting down in his Pa's chair. "Everything ready for tonight?"

"Rees, Isaac, and Micah are over there getting everything ready."

"What's tonight?" Lydia asked.

"A surprise," Mark replied. "Now, didn't you have something to show me?"

"Oh, yeah!" Lydia ran to her bedroom before returning with a piece of paper and handing it to her brother.

Mark looked down to see a drawing of himself and Lydia at the pond, fishing.

"That way, when you go home you have a picture of us."

"Well thank you, Lydia. I'll take real good care of it."

"Are you going to miss me when you go home?"

"I sure will!"

"Mark, I need to start supper," Milly said. "Is there anything you need?"

"No, thank you."

As Milly headed to the kitchen, Lydia climbed up on the arm of the chair beside her brother.

"...Mark?"

"Yeah?"

"...What happened to the bad men?"

"...What bad men?" Mark asked, hoping she wasn't remembering Hawz and Lee.

"...The bad men that hurt you when we went fishing."

Mark let out a heavy sigh and put an arm around his sister.

"...Those men aren't ever going to come back. They're gone now."

"But what if they do come back? If you're going home... and they..."

"...Lydia, those men died. They can't come back. They won't ever hurt you again, I promise."

"Mark?"

"Yes, Lydia?"

"...I was scared."

"...That's alright... I was, too. I'm sorry I left you, but I had to get those men away from each other so I could get you back home."

"Mark, are you always going to be hurt?"

"No, I'll be fine in a few weeks."

"...I'm glad. ...Mark, I'm happy that you're my brother."

"Me too, Lydia. I love you."

18MC18

That evening, everyone at the ranch surprised Lucas with a small, belated birthday celebration. Micah was the first to turn in, shortly followed by Rees and Isaac, who had spent all day on the range rounding up cows. Milly eventually took Lydia back home to put her to bed, leaving Lucas and Mark alone in Mark and Cassie's dining room.

"...Mark, we sure are going to miss having you around... sure you don't want to stay a little longer?"

"...I've missed you Pa, and I've enjoyed this last week, but... I..."

Lucas smiled and nodded in understanding.

"Cassie and the boys need you home as much as you need to see them. I'm sure these last few days have been especially hard without them here."

"...Yeah, they have."

"Are you nervous about the baby coming?"

Mark slowly nodded, letting out a deep breath.

"...Just knowing that out of four pregnancies, she's only been able to carry two to term... it's nerve wracking. And I know the more miscarriages a woman has, the less likely she is to be able to have a healthy pregnancy. I'm worried about the baby, about Cassie... I was really nervous about leaving her for this trip, but she insisted that I come. ...It's not that I didn't want to see you, I just..."

"Mark, I understand. It's a hard time to go through."

"But I am glad I came... it was good to be able to talk to you, to see everyone again."

"I'm just sorry you had to spend half your time at Doc's."

"Yeah... that part I could've done without," Mark agreed with a grin.

Lucas watched as his son's smile slowly faded.

"What is it?"

"...Pa, Lydia does remember. This afternoon... she asked me what happened to Hawz and Lee."

"...What did you tell her?"

"At first I tried to put it lightly. I told her they weren't going to come back. But she was scared and asked what if they DID come back. ...So I told her they had died. That helped her some, but... she was still pretty shaken up. ...I think she's going to need to talk to you and Ma about it."

"...What else?" Lucas asked, seeing more in Mark's eyes.

"...I wish she hadn't been hurt, but... I can't tell you how glad I am that she didn't see me kill Lee. I don't know if she's put two and two together, but... even if she does realize that I killed him, seeing someone killed at that age... I'm just glad she doesn't have to deal with that."

"Mark... do you still remember..."

"The bank robbery?"

Lucas nodded.

"Bits and pieces."

"And..." Lucas hesitated, not wanting to talk about it if Mark didn't remember.

"Yes. ...I remember watching the house burn... the outlaws laughing... people... people screaming. I remember watching... watching the gun fight... watching you struggle with the leader..."

"...I'm sorry, Son, I shouldn't have brought it up..."

"...It's alright. It's... I'd just say, with Lydia... let her know she can talk to you. I mean, we did eventually talk... but it took me so long to say something because I felt like I would get in trouble for some reason if I talked about it."

"...I'm sorry you felt that way."

"That's not your fault. I just... like I said, I would let Lydia know it's alright to talk about it with you."

"I will."

Mark looked out the window for a moment, a distant look coming over him.

"...I can't believe we're here."

Lucas looked at his son in confusion before asking what he meant. Mark looked to his Pa as he explained.

"Twenty years. It doesn't feel like it could have been that long ago. So much has happened and changed. I mean... who would've thought that you'd be remarried and I would have a sister... that Rees would be staying with us... that you'd be getting ready to walk Rachael down the aisle. ...I certainly didn't think we'd be living a thousand miles away from each other, but even then..."

"Even then...?"

"Don't take this the wrong way... but I never thought that was something I'd really be okay with. I hate that our families have to be apart, but... that's something I can accept now. I... after so much struggle, after all we've been through..."

"It's changed you, Mark. You've let the circumstances mold you into a man I couldn't be any prouder of. A man who loves and protects his family; a man who I know can stand on his own two feet. We're still hoping and praying you all can come back home soon... but until then... we both know that it's all going to be alright."

Mark nodded in agreement, a slight smile on his face.

"...I would ask if you wanted to play a game of checkers, but I wouldn't want your feelings hurt when I beat you again..."

"Is that a challenge?"

"I'm calling you out," Mark teased. "I'll even let you make the first move."

19MC19

Monday morning, Mark said a long goodbye to his friends and family before boarding the train. It was a difficult morning, but Mark was looking forward to returning to his wife and sons.

It was a long couple of days as Mark travelled home. His injuries were giving him more trouble than he would have liked, keeping Mark from walking through the cars or standing and stretching.

Finally, Mark was getting into the stagecoach that would take him back home. He made conversation with the other passenger, but was distracted as his thoughts continued to be pulled to his family.

It was late Wednesday night when the stage pulled into Dayton. Mark carefully stepped out of the stage before taking his bag from the driver and heading home. Finding the front door locked, Mark made his way around to the back and retrieved the key to the kitchen door before letting himself inside.

Stepping into the kitchen, Mark smiled as he saw his wife asleep at the table, the beginnings of a dress laid out underneath her. Mark walked to Cassie and put his hands on her shoulders, bending down to give her a kiss on the cheek.

"Cass?"

Cassie slowly roused, sitting up in confusion before finally turning to see her husband.

"Mark!" Cassie stood and wrapped her arms around her husband, then gave him a kiss. "What are you doing home? I thought..."

"They got the road cleared early and decided to let the stage run." Mark cupped his wife's face in his hands and gave her a long, passionate kiss. "I can't tell you how good it is to see you. I missed you."

As Mark wrapped his arms around her waist, Cassie looked up at her husband and smiled in concern.

"When your Pa called... Mark, I was so worried. ...Are you alright?"

"Sore, but I'll be fine. How are the boys?"

"Anxious to see you. I could hardly get them to go down tonight."

"And our youngest McCain?" Mark asked, putting a hand to his wife's stomach.

"Doing just fine." Cassie hesitated before continuing. "...Mark, what happened? Please... I want to know."

Mark nodded and gave his wife a kiss on the forehead. They sat down at the table together as Mark explained what had happened to himself and Lydia.

"...He wanted you to kill someone just so you would go to jail?"

"No, Otero is all for statehood, just like Governor Prince was. ...But because I double crossed him last time... he wanted to kill two birds with one stone."

"...How's your sister doing?"

"She's shaken up, but you'd never know she was hurt."

"...Mark, I'm so sorry... you said you wanted to stay and..."

"Cass, this isn't your fault." Mark took his wife's hand, shaking his head. "This isn't your fault in the least. And I'm glad I went... I needed to go. So thank you for kicking me out."

Mark bent forward and gave his wife a kiss.

"...Then I'm glad you were able to go home... I just wish this wouldn't have happened."

"...That's just it, though."

"What's just it?"

"Home. ...As soon as I arrived... something felt different. It wasn't the same. I eventually came to realize that while North Fork will always be "home" for our family... I wasn't home. The ranch... it wasn't the same. It wasn't my home because for the first time... my heart wasn't there. My heart was here with you and the boys."

"Well then, Mr. McCain... welcome home."