Author's Note: We couldn't leave you hanging on too long after that last chapter. So here it is, the moment we've all been waiting for. And over 5000 words, too!
Also, can we all just take a moment to appreciate JenniferLadyBug and the amazingness that is her art. If you haven't yet, check us out on Tumblr (I'm erickawrites and she's Jenniferladybug). She's elevated this story to a new level, and the art for this chapter absolutely blew my mind. She's been sketching like a mad woman, inspired by the song "Exist for Love" by Aurora. Please share with Reylo friends, her art deserves all the praise in the world. Drop her some love, and if you haven't commented for a while, let us know you're still reading! Because your comments are the best reward you can give us for this labor of love.
The misty curtain hanging over Ahch-To had lifted, making way for the morning suns. Porgs roosted in groups on the rocks, sunning themselves. They dove out of the way as Rey passed, squawking their protests and ruffling their feathers in irritation. She flung her small pack over her shoulder and led Ben up the steep stone stairway toward the southern coast of the island. This was where the caretakers tended several empty dwellings, always prepared for the Jedi to return.
Rey figured they'd remember her. Though she was pretty sure her return would not be celebrated after the damage she'd caused during her last two visits to the island. The first mishap unfolded just as the Bond had opened for the first time and she found herself alone with Kylo Ren. She'd shot him, fully intending to kill him. The blaster bolt had torn a hole in the wall of the stone hut. Then, on her return visit, she'd set fire to his TIE and left the smoldering wreckage for the caretakers to… well… take care of.
Yeah, they might not be too happy to see her again. And now, with what Rey planned to do on this sacred Jedi ground… Well what the caretakers didn't know, wouldn't hurt them.
She turned to shoot Ben a glance. His black jacket flapped wildly in the salty breeze and his hair flowed behind him like the glossy wings of a raven in flight. He smiled up at her. A wide open smile that lit his eyes and suddenly she was weightless, as though the world had dropped out from under her.
Because it had. She had tripped, barely catching herself after losing her footing, the contents of her pack clanging together, echoing off the stony walkway. Ben's gloved hand shot out to steady her, keeping her from tumbling down the stairs. He had cut such a picturesque profile, framed by the verdant cliffs and rocky outcroppings of the island, that Rey was caught staring at him instead of watching her footing.
"Watch your step," Ben teased, releasing his grip on her arm. "I'd hate to have to waste time healing another broken ankle. Or worse."
Even with the fresh air, Rey suddenly felt hot. She took a breath and turned back to focus on the steps to keep from falling to her death but also to hide the embarrassed flush that had surely claimed her cheeks.
Why did he have to be so kriffing attractive?
"What's in that pack anyway?" he said, looking so smug, she was certain he knew what had caused her to trip. "Whatever it was, it sounds like it's in a million pieces now."
Rey ignored his question, trying to focus away from the contents of her bag. It was supposed to be a surprise. So, she attempted to think about something innocent… the ocean, the cute little Porgs, but found her thoughts wandering to their last kiss in the transport. The way his body had felt against hers and she thought about what other parts of him would feel like.
Oh Force.
A deep chuckle behind her and yes, he'd been hearing her thoughts for sure. With how open the Bond had been since they'd passed through the gateway together, that shouldn't be a surprise. The Force still vibrated with their energy and the Bond was a constant barrage of emotions and colors as she tried to put one foot in front of the other.
Step.
Another step.
More steps.
Had there always been so many kriffing steps on this island?
Then again, she'd never walked them with a burning ache between her legs and the man she loved at her heels.
Rey finally took the last step, breathless from more than just the hike. The stone huts were exactly as she remembered, blanched on their western faces from the wind and suns. The temple stood untouched. Even the hut Luke had blown apart when he'd discovered her with Kylo Ren, had been perfectly rebuilt. Everything, the smell, briny ocean and old wood, was the same, bringing her back immediately.
Ben positioned himself next to her and studied the nearest stone dwelling, testing her emotions down the Bond.
She could feel his tug on her, a gentle nudge as he spoke. "This is where you were sitting when Luke interrupted us. The night you came to me."
Something was building again. That thickness in the air, that vibrating energy in Force and she felt she had to yell to be heard above the thunder of it. "Yes."
His eyes darkened, not with anger, but with something else that caused her heart to leap to a gallop. "When we touched hands that night. What did you see?"
Rey turned from him then, needing a moment to retreat from the weightless feeling in her stomach and the roar of blood and Force in her ears. She approached the entrance of the first hut, running her fingers over the weather-beaten stone, closing her eyes. The memory of that night was emblazoned so brightly in her mind, there was no way she would ever forget it.
"I saw us together," she said, finally, turning back to him. "First, I saw you killing Snoke, and then… flashes of us together."
"What kind of flashes?" he asked, those dark eyes promising everything.
"Enough to know we'd be fighting on the same side."
He stepped closer, and his scent, rich leather and earthy musk, joined the salty breeze and she swallowed.
He cocked an eyebrow. "That's all?"
She swallowed again, thickly, still not trusting her voice to be clear. "Well maybe there was more to it, but it's not fair that I have to tell first."
Avoiding his penetrating gaze to keep from jumping on him right that moment, she pulled back the weathered curtain draped in the doorway and peered inside. It was just as she remembered, dusty and furnished with a single bench, but it was the most privacy she could hope for.
Suddenly, around the corner of one of the other dwellings, a trio of Lanai caretakers came into view farther down the path. She ducked under the curtain and pulled Ben into the hut by his coat before they were seen.
"Who were they?" he asked, brushing the curtain aside just enough to peer out at the intruders.
"Caretakers. Nevermind them, they won't bother us," she said, leaning closer and raising an eyebrow. "You were saying?"
He gave her that glorious smirk and blooms of heat spread across her chest. "I saw us together, too," he said. "I wasn't sure what it meant at the time, it was mostly just an overwhelming feeling, but I was convinced you would join me. That you would join the Dark Side."
Her pulse was pounding loud enough to hear now, the anticipation of his touch had set the very air around her in motion. "The Dark Side? What exactly did you see?"
"Well, I saw you wearing this for one," he said, pinching the fabric of her tunic between his fingers. "These aren't exactly Jedi robes."
"And?"
"And then, I'm pretty sure we did something like this…"
And in that moment, Rey wasn't sure exactly what that something was, because the entire world exploded inside of her and in the Force all around. It was as if a flood of emotions and colors and memories was released all at the same time.
And like an explosion, it engulfed each of her senses, until all at once the random sounds and feelings coalesced into something recognizable, and she remembered too.
Yes. This was the kiss she'd felt when they touched hands.
It was unmistakable. The smell – ocean salt and his earthy scent.
The taste of him.
Yes. The crash of the waves in the distance and the rush of the Force, of light and dark and everything in between. This was the feeling she'd had when she'd touched his fingers from across the stars, only then, she hadn't known what it meant.
But now, oh, now it was magnified tenfold because it was real. He was real and the sensation they were gifting each other was so intense, it had made echoes in the Force they'd felt a year ago.
He pulled away from their kiss and gazed down at her. Rays of sunlight streaked into the room through the window, framing him from behind and she could see that all along, the Force did have a plan. The Force had shown them the same vision that night, only they'd interpreted it differently based on their experiences at the time. He thought they would be together in Darkness and she in the Light. And only now, could they finally appreciate that vision, because they had met in the middle.
"I love you, Ben Solo," she said, smiling the most genuine smile she could remember ever giving.
"And I love you," he said, lifting a hand to brush his fingers against her cheek.
He looked down at his hand and shot it a disgusted look before stripping his gloves and tossing them onto the bench.
Then he drew those newly bare fingers across her shoulder and loosened the clasps of her cape. It fluttered to the floor and he met her eyes again, biting his lip, and she could sense his anticipation along with little shocks of nervousness fluttering down the Bond.
He lightly grazed the fabric of her tunic, finding the zipper at the nape of her neck and easing it down. "Now, I want to finally show you how much I love you."
He led her slowly across the room to stand near the bench and brought his hands to her collar, rolling down the fabric until she felt the nip of the cool air against her collar bones. When Rey looked down at Ben's hands, she could see his fingers were trembling.
He was as anxious as she was.
She offered an apologetic look before interrupting him to pull the pack off her shoulder. Then she opened the flap to reveal the contents. One bottle of aged Corellian whiskey and two tall crystal vessels, haphazardly wrapped in a piece of fabric. Miraculously, the crystal hadn't broken during her near fall on the steps despite the loud clatter.
"I sent Calsyn a message while you were in the 'fresher," she explained. "She managed to get this to me. I told her it had been a rough day and I needed a drink to help me sleep before we try to find Malak."
"There's some truth to that," Ben said, taking the bottle in his hands and turning it over. The amber liquid reflected the sunlight, a shade lighter than the eyes studying it. He uncorked it and the spicy tang of alcohol filled the air between them. "This is Corellian stuff. Aged, what? Twelve years?"
She nodded. Of course he would know his liquor. It was the same vintage that Han had preferred, after all.
She held out a glass, urging him to pour the first drink.
As he poured, she felt a sharp pang of sadness down the Bond. For his father, but also for Rey, for those nights Ben had been forced to sit by and watch her drink. Soon, the feeling was joined by other emotions. A tangle of them, as was typical for him.
Her insecurity bubbled up to the surface again as she felt the echo of Ben's intertwined emotions down the Bond until finally, she felt she owed him an explanation and began to stutter out a justification for the whiskey. "I mean, I… I was nervous. I want you so much but I was nervous. And I thought, well, I thought we could share a toast. I know it's not even midday yet, a little early for a drink, so If you think it's stupid we can -"
"No." His brows hung heavy over those expressive eyes and she could hardly look at him, she was worried she had hurt him. "It's not stupid. I'm nervous, too. And hey," he took her chin between his thumb and forefinger and forced her to meet his eyes again. "My dad always used to say, it's five o'clock at some cantina somewhere."
Then she laughed. She tipped her head back and laughed until she could hardly hold the glass in her hand. Whiskey sloshed onto the floor and Ben laughed too, dancing out of the way of the spilling drink, and suddenly everything was easy again.
When her hands had stopped bobbing wildly, she held out the other glass for him, which he filled before corking the bottle and setting it next to the bench. Rey handed one glass to Ben and they both fixed their eyes on the ridiculously fancy crystal, made more ostentatious by the backdrop of a primitive stone hut and dusty bench. But somehow, now, it was all perfect.
Rey raised her glass in the customary way. "I'd like to propose a toast," she said, hooking one hand in Ben's belt and pulling him closer.
"To what, may I ask?" He looked down at her, raising an eyebrow.
"To us. To never being alone again."
And those words had an immediate effect on him. She could feel the pull of memories coming from the Bond, see the realization dawn in those discerning eyes.
"You're not alone," he said, just as he had that night so long ago.
"Neither are you," she replied.
Then they brought their glasses together, the light clink of crystal echoing off the stone walls, and they drank, never taking their eyes off each other. They drank deeply until they'd drained those fancy glasses and Rey felt the familiar bite of Corellian fire running all the way down her throat until it stopped to burn her belly. But this time, she didn't go for another glass to drown her feelings, as she had on Tatooine.
This time, she reached for the man she loved to drown in his affections.
And drown her he did. His lips met hers and before she could find a place to put her glass, he was pulling her towards him, cradling her head with one large hand, burying his fingers in her hair and kissing her hard. He tore the glass from her grip. It clanked against the bottle as he carelessly stowed them at the base of the bench, without ever breaking contact.
At first, his kisses were reckless, forceful and hasty, as if he felt he was running out of time. His tongue still held that sharp bite of whiskey, and as heat bloomed in her belly, he made swift work of pulling her tunic down. She squirmed out of the sleeves, eager to feel his fingers against her bare skin, until she was stripped from the waist up, save for her breast band.
Ben seemed spurred on by the drink as much as she had been, and wasted no time touching her everywhere. As that heat in her stomach began to spread like liquid fire in her veins, she worked his jacket off, needing to feel more of his body against hers.
He grunted as he struggled with his belt, the guttural sound going straight to her groin and the fire was there, too.
Had she ever wanted anything this much?
As he turned to toss his jacket and tunic onto the bench, Rey stared, transfixed by the hard muscles flexing across his bare chest with the simple motion. It wasn't the first time, or even the second or third time she'd seen him bare from the waist up. But the sheer massive size of him was not something she could ignore. His body demanded to be appreciated and appreciate it she did, running worshipful fingers over the defining lines of his pectorals, to the smooth lines and furrows made by his collarbones.
This time, when their lips met again, Rey found his kisses had slowed. His lips seemed to soften, passionate and honey sweet, and he moved his mouth more carefully against hers. He was savoring the taste of her, too. And in that moment, they had all the time in the world.
The Force was a constant building pressure in the room now as Ben stoked her desire with each kiss, each caress of his hand. As he slowly removed her breast band, she felt the energy of Light and Dark begin to press harder against them. As he explored the curve of her breasts, the Force rippled against her skin after each touch, it hummed in her ears after each audible gasp from him. It swelled, expanding into something palpable, an actual pressure against her eardrums.
"Can you feel that?" she finally gritted out as he kissed her neck.
"Yes." And his voice was like gravel in her ear. "If I don't make love to you right now, the Force itself is going to crush me."
She snuffled a laugh into his shoulder and bit down playfully. "Better hurry up then," she teased.
"With pleasure." And with that, he spread his jacket and her cloak onto the stone floor and knelt at her feet, pulling her close to nuzzle her belly as she stood before him. He kissed her in the hollows near her hips while his hands worked to slide her leggings down until she was forced to bend to help with her boots. Her heart was racing, blood and Force crashing in her ears as she stood before him, this time wearing only her underwear.
Then, Ben pulled her by the hips, lowered his head and kissed her. There. Through her slickened underwear he kissed her and she felt him like an electric shock. Hours of pent up need and building desire hit her all at once and she gasped from the intensity of it.
He made a sound, something very non-speech like, but communicating his own desire much clearer than words could, before bringing his fingers to help her shimmy free of the last of her clothing, letting his touch linger at the very center of her need for him.
She exhaled a strained breath, pushing her hips closer, begging for more of his fingers, his mouth.
He looked up at her, eyes gleaming under those dark lashes and she thought he had no right to be so beautiful.
Then without warning, he lifted one of her legs onto his shoulder, spreading her out before him to give himself room to…
"Erhh!" She released a grunting cry of simultaneous surprise and pleasure as those soft lips met her sex and began to move in a slow, indulgent caress. She rolled her hips forward, unable to keep from chasing the exquisite sensation.
When she nearly fell over from sheer bliss, the familiar signature of his Force wrapped around her. Dark tendrils of power and desire, warm trails of light and love, and he cradled her there, right where he wanted her, as his hot tongue began to unravel that tightly-wound knot of desire at her core.
And like a skiff in a stormy sea, she let herself be carried away by the pleasure.
Soon, she realized, she was coming close to a place of no return and she gripped him by the hair and pulled him away. "No," she said. "I want…" But her voice wasn't working, so she tried through the Bond.
I want to come together.
He hesitated, staring into her eyes defiantly, but when she pushed against his chest, and he pretended to collapse backward onto the floor, she knew she had won. He could be stubborn, but she knew he would always give her what she wanted.
So, with liquid-heat burning between her legs, nearly unable to think for the intensity of it, she climbed down onto him. Pants still hanging onto his waist, she straddled him and rocked herself against him until she was sure his own desire would put a hole through his trousers. She nearly laughed at this thought as she ground down on him, but with the fabric chafing at her sensitive inner thighs she couldn't keep it up long enough to find out for sure. A swift Force pull and some maneuvering by both of them and he was finally as naked as she was.
The only light spilling into the room, came through a high window on the other side of the hut. But even the indirect morning light was enough to give her a full view. And Ben Solo was large.
She remembered touching him under the Great Tree, marveling at the smoothness of him, of how he felt in her hand, but she'd never thought about how he would actually fit inside of her.
Until now.
Kriff.
But that thought was fleeting, quickly becoming entangled in her swirling thoughts, in the whiskey heat dancing in her veins, and in the need to be closer to him. And when he looked up at her, with those warm, adoring eyes, she couldn't remember what she'd been thinking about at all as she lowered herself onto him. The searing press of his flesh against hers was enough to set her hips in motion and her body simply took over.
She centered herself onto him, so wet now, that she found she could glide up and down against him, drawing so much perfect sensation from this motion she wondered how having him inside of her could possibly be better than this. In pursuit of something to sate the ever-growing hunger inside of her, she ground a rhythm with her hips, watching his face contort into a dozen beautiful combinations of pleasure below her. Meanwhile, the Force was a constant presence, spurring her on, pressing her down harder, choosing her rhythm as they became closer and closer.
But soon, even this wasn't enough. She could feel Ben's frantic breath against her ear, his needy hands massaging her, but underneath it she felt the rhythm of his thoughts in the Force, asking for more. And she agreed, sending echoes of her readiness for him down the Bond, because even pressed flush against each other, they still weren't close enough.
In a show of physical strength that sent a carnal shiver through her, he lifted her off of him, and flipped her over. Gently, but so fast, she didn't have time to protest at the loss of contact because he was back against her already.
He held himself up by the elbows and gazed down at her. And suddenly, all the air was sucked out of the room, like an airlock left open in the dead of space, and the Force went quiet. It was just the two of them, their bodies screaming for each other, their breath mingling, minds completely entwined as the universe slipped into repose.
"Rey..." And that was all he said, all he really had to say. Words were unnecessary as his eyes spoke his devotion much more clearly than anything he could ever say. And he continued to gaze down at her as he eased her legs apart with a gentle touch and took himself in hand, guiding himself toward her entrance.
She hissed, a sharp intake of breath as he stretched her to a delicious place between pain and pleasure.
"I'm sorry," he said, faltering, and she almost screamed as he began pulling out again. But she caught his hand in hers instead, bending down to take him in her own hand, showing him that she still wanted this, still wanted him.
She was so wet, so pliant and ready for him, that the need for him far outweighed any small twinge of pain. And so slowly, she showed him how to claim her fully. And with her reassurance, inch by inch he sheathed himself completely inside of her. He relaxed from his elbows, allowing some of his weight to rest on her, and she relished the burning stretch of him inside of her, the way he completely filled her, his comfortable weight pressing down, making her feel absolutely whole.
And she whispered what she could of her pleasure, into his ear. "You feel so good."
A tremor went through him that she could feel in her delicate inner walls, and he didn't have to speak to tell her this was exactly what he needed, too. The universe picked up its rhythm again and the Force began to hum once more, that pressure returning to the air around them and Ben started to move.
Slowly at first, so slowly it was agonizing because as soon as she realized this was exactly what she needed, she wanted him to move faster, but still, he rocked gently, at that same leisurely pace.
With the Bond wide open, she knew he could feel everything he was doing to her, yet he continued to move agonizingly slow. Shockwaves of his feelings flowed down their connection and she felt his pleasure, he was so close to coming apart inside of her. And she understood then, he was going so slow to keep from climaxing too soon.
She reached a hand out to rake her fingers through the hair hanging down over his eyes. His lips were pressing together in concentration, the muscles in his neck and shoulders standing out, cutting grooves in his pale skin.
And her only thoughts were - Was this real? Was he really hers?
Force, he felt so good, but she needed him to touch her, too.
She tried to shift them sideways, keeping him inside of her, to free up one of his hands. Moving as one gave her such a perfect sensuous fullness, she couldn't stop herself from rocking her own hips against him and he sucked in a breath.
With his newly freed hand, he explored her curves, moving his fingers luxuriously over her skin, to her breasts, then rolling a sensitive nipple between his fingers.
He bent to take that nipple in his mouth next, making slow circles with his tongue, and she was sure the inferno he'd started within her would consume her completely. A hundred flashes of light exploded across her vision as she felt herself drawing closer to some fated destination.
As she rocked her hips to meet his slow pumping movement, his rhythm intensified. And soon, he was thrusting in and out of her, taking her closer, closer and she was on her back again, her hands haphazardly grasping at his shoulders to pull him near.
He kissed her, tongue sweeping into her, claiming her even as his body did the same, over and over building something ancient, as the Force sang along to the sacred hymn of their bodies. She moaned his name into his ear, begging him for more. More of him. Faster. Closer. Just MORE.
A swirl of darkness curled wisps of ice around them and Rey shivered. She rocked her hips hard to meet his, begging for his warmth to balance the Darkness she'd pulled from the Force. She felt him grasp for it, the Light, wrapping it around them gently in perfect Balance. The weight and pressure of the Force, the Light and Dark, the ice and the heat of it spurred the thrust of his hips and complimented the taste of his soft lips against hers, Gods she was completely unravelling.
And as he drove himself inside of her one more time, she felt the world fall away as she was swept up by currents of pleasure. All the heat and hunger dissolving into ribbons of pure brilliance. She cried out against his mouth and felt him bite down on her lip. Her inner walls clenched and released as he shuddered inside of her, streaming heat as an explosion of Force surrounded them.
One. They were one.
And she floated there, in a place between worlds. A place both outside of her body, but also closer somehow to a new physical awareness. Joined with the man she loved.
He thrust into her a few more times, drawing out every last bit of pleasure from her until her shaking had stopped and she was well and truly spent. He went limp, looking every bit as satisfied as she felt as he lowered himself onto her again, still inside of her.
They stayed there, listening to their breath mingle, hearts pounding against each other's chests, Force ebbing and flowing in alternating waves of Light and Dark. A pulse, their heartbeat in the Force.
And Rey sensed, something had changed.
"Wow." Her voice sounded pitifully fragile and meaningless in the face of that monumental something that had just passed between them.
But still, he chuckled, kissing her as if for the first time, making her stupid 'wow' seem like the most majestic, most meaningful expression of love in the entire Galactic Basic language.
When he finally pulled out of her, she wanted to scream from the emptiness he left behind. But he gathered her in his arms and held her, folding her back against his chest.
Then he whispered into her ear. "I would spend a thousand years in the In Between to share that with you again."
And she'd never known what people meant when they said their hearts "melted." What a stupid expression. She'd thought such proclamations silly in those sappy holovids Rose liked to watch. But under the strength of Ben's words, her chest grew so hot, so heavy with love for him in that moment, that it truly did feel like her heart was melting.
"I love you so much," she said.
"You're my everything," he replied, combing his fingers through her hair rhythmically until she felt her heart slow to its normal pace, fully relaxed and completely content.
And they lay there, watching the dust motes float lazily across the band of sunlight streaming through the window, as the suns rose higher in the sky outside.
"Something changed, didn't it?" she finally asked.
"I think so," he said.
She couldn't explain it, and she wasn't sure he'd be able to either. But she needed him to try.
"What does it mean?"
"I'm not sure..." he began his thought, but trailed off.
She turned to face him again, needing to confirm that what she'd heard in his voice was visible on his features. Yes, there was that scientific gleam in his eye as he puzzled over a problem, that fidgeting way he chewed on the inside of his cheek. And she was no longer able to keep her fingers from tracing across his jaw, from touching those kiss-swollen lips. "But… you have some idea? Of what that was?"
"I do," he said.
"And?" she prompted, trying to spur him to talk more by running her fingers over his shoulders, the curve of his biceps.
He sighed contentedly and continued, "Do you remember what the Father said about the Prime Jedi?"
"Yes, Dark and Light must live together, find balance," she said.
He nodded and leaned in to kiss her gently as though he couldn't help himself and continued on. "Two that are one."
And suddenly, the pressure of the Force, the strange swirling Darkness, the automatic grab for the Light, for balance, and their joining. It all seemed to make sense. A greater purpose. And she remembered what she'd thought immediately after they'd reached that blissful climax together. The immediate thought she'd had was that they'd become…
"One."
And as their voices spoke in unison, out loud and through the Bond, she was sure she could feel the word echo across the centuries.