AUTHOR'S NOTE: This is probably the second last or last chapter since everything seems strained (constipated)
DISCLAIMER: The note that is written belongs to Haldir and JRR Tolkien.
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Dear Anonymous, (please post)
Goodbye. It is me, Haldir. Since westernese is not my best language, please excuse any mistakes found in this letter.
If your mouth is agape and you're wondering how I can write when I'm dead, I am to remind you THAT I AM ALIVE. If the only exposure you've been through is with the movies, perhaps you should read the book. I don't die; in fact, none of the elves ever come to helms deep, save Legolas. His father says he's mentally unstable.
I swear to the Valar Aragorn wrote the last line. His computer has a virus and he's trying to use mine.
Again, it was the actor, whoever it was, who was so (un)lucky to play my character that got 'killed,' so please, stop writing stories where the poor (mentally unstable) elf (Aka Legolas.) is buried in his grief for me. But I must say, all of them, or rather the latter parts, are VERY well written. Most of them proclaim emotions that were thought not possible to get out on paper. For my part, the storyline is a bit overdone. Still, keep writing, because most people still enjoy the stories that you write. For my part, the storyline is a bit overdone.
Especially Aragorn, who thinks that if I die, he can have my computer. I'm taking it to the Undying Lands with me, he can have Orophin's.
No matter how hard I try to apologize, I am sure to receive a flame or two. So, better end it here, thank you for so faithfully reading this letter.
Bonjour,
Haldir, boarder guard in Lothlórien (who is neither fat nor dead).
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A/N: I'm sorry but I can't open the letter from Aragorn because if I do, it'll give me a virus. Stupid middle earth computers!!