9:00 AM, September 28th, 1996

Continued.

"Let me help you through the floo," she said.

"Alright," he leaned carefully on her shoulders as she stepped to grate and spoke their destination. She gripped his waist and helped him through the empty house. It was darker and quieter than it had been during the summer. It was strangely off-putting without the house full of people coming and going. There were no Weasley's or Order members to greet them in the drawing-room or poke their head out of the small library or one of the many bedrooms they passed.

Everyone was in school or out on Order business and she felt a stab of guilt skipping class. Even if it was for a good reason.

"The bathroom, please," his voice soft as they finally reached Sirius's room after a slow trek up the stairs.

As she helped him sit on the toilet she moved to the bath and turned on the hot water. She was oddly reminded of the morning Remus had moved efficiently around the room and prepared it for her use. After she stoppered the water and grabbed a towel, she looked around for something to add to the bath.

"The cabinet."

She turned and opened the cabinet slowly. Everything in Sirius's room was unfamiliar. Everything there belonged to either Sirius or Remus. She felt displaced as she rummaged through the potions and creams in the cabinet.

"Here," Remus said suddenly behind her and his hand on her waist. He reached into the cabinet and pulled out a small vial with Snape's spiky handwriting.

"What is it?" She asked as she maneuvered herself from between him and the sink. She tried vainly to slow her heart rate after feeling him so close behind her, but it spiked when she realized he was already shirtless. She turned and went to turn off the water trying to occupy herself and look anywhere but at him.

He handed the vile to her before he started to unbutton his trousers, "You can add it to the water. Severus made it to counteract the physical effects of the cruciatus."

She inspected the pale cream color as she uncorked it and poured the small vial into the bathwater. She watched the syrupy concoction twirl into the water and then dissolve slowly.

"It helps with relaxing the muscles and the pain," he said as he stepped into the bath. She averted her gaze swiftly as he slowly lowered himself in the hot water. "Ahhh," he groaned as he settled.

She watched as his eyes slipped closed and he started to relax into the bath. "Do you need anything else? Is there anything I can do?"

His eyes opened and he watched her a moment, "Hermione. If you're uncomfortable- You don't have to stay. I'll be fine."

"What? No," she said and then blushed, "I just - I'm not used to – this," she looked down at her hands as they gripped her skirt.

"That's okay, too," he told her softly and moved to grasp her hand.

She raised her head and smiled at him softly, "Remus, I know I've seen you naked before, I just wasn't expecting it, and then – there you were," she finished lamely.

He gave her a closed mouth smile as he tried not to grin and then nodded. "You could always join me?" It was a question, but he leaned back into the bath inviting her and raised his eyebrows daring her.

She wanted to. She did. She wanted to strip right there and crawl over him until she had him wrapped securely in her arms.

"No, I should go. I've already missed Herbology. I still have Potions."

"Hermione," he took her hand again this time bringing it to his lips, "Potions is canceled today, and the only place you have to be right now besides here is at the meeting tonight. You can stay here awhile, and no one will mind. I said we should talk before you left and we didn't have a chance to."

Her pulse jumped wondering if he'd be open to it or if he'd just avoid her again.

Remus rubbed small circles into the palm of her hand with his thumbs and she said, "I recall that you said we should talk when we were both dressed." She raised her eyebrows at him pointedly, "Are you hungry, I could make you something while you finish up here? Then we could talk."

"The potion doesn't take long with my ailment. Don't go." It wasn't a command. She heard the question in his tone. "When I said that to you, I was having a hard time controlling myself. I'm not now, we can talk." The look he gave her was earnest.

She squeezed his hand, "Okay." She took a deep breath and braced herself. She didn't want to give Remus a reason to pull away from her again, but she knew she needed to be completely honest with him and herself. "I don't feel like myself right now," she started, "I jumped headfirst into this with you and Sirius, and I can't understand the logic behind any of it." Remus watched her as she collected more of her thoughts and she was grateful he didn't immediately pounce on her uncertainty. "I already cared very deeply for both of you. I think the bond has something to do with that. Since that night my emotions are all over the place. I feel such a strong desire to be your mate, Remus. It's all I can think about. It's overwhelming and I don't like that I don't feel in control of myself right now." Her doubts over the last few weeks surprisingly came out easily in a calm voice despite the emotional turmoil she found herself in. "Despite all of that though, I can't help but feel that this is right. You and me. Sirius and me. It makes absolutely no sense but it's the only thing at the moment that brings me any certainty. Any peace."

Her eyes drifted down to her lap wondering and fearing what he would say.

"I understand," he said.

She heard the water ripple as he moved closer to her and pulled her face to his and placed a soft kiss on her forehead. "It may surprise you, but I've lived with this for a long time. I hate feeling beholden to the wolf and his desires. I'm never sure what's just me."

His mouth hovered over hers as he spoke. The warmth of his presence calmed her.

"You know, I don't like how you and Sirius refer to yourself as separate from the wolf. You're the same, Remus. The wolf will only ever want what you want. What you deny yourself the wolf will only try harder to give you. You're pulling yourself apart."

He kissed her lips tenderly hovering a moment before saying, "Easier said than done. I understand what you are going through probably more than anyone could. I don't want this for you. I want you to be sure of yourself. Not question what is real to you and what is the pack bond. I might not trust the wolf but I trust the bond I have with others. I want that for you before you try to make any more hasty decisions."

She pulled away, "That's not- What are you saying?"

He stood from the bath and she determinedly kept her eyes on him even as her face flushed. He grabbed the towel and stepped past her out of the tub. She watched as he toweled off the water from his body. His weariness from earlier nearly gone.

After the towel was secure around his waist, he said, "You married Sirius because you had to. I don't want to rush into a mate bond with everything else that is going on."

His voice had a finality to it. As if he had already come to this conclusion long before they spoke. Anger boiled up inside of her. Everyone had everything planned out. No one seemed to want to include her in anything.

"Why did you want to talk if you already had your mind made up?" Angry tears streamed down her face. She stood wondering what the point of any of it had been. She wanted to flee back to school, to her friends. She took measured steps away from him and back into the room. More tears flooded her face the further she moved away from him. The comfort of their pack bond did nothing to stem the turmoil she felt from his rejection.

Strong arms wrapped themselves around her before she could make it to the hallway. Tension in her chest broke as she turned and let out an undignified sob into his chest. She felt torn. She didn't want to break down in front of the man that rejected her, but she couldn't help but cling to his chest as he tried to soothe her. His hand rubbed down the length of her back.

"Why?" she cried. She might have been afraid of her feelings, but she trusted the bond they shared. "Why can't you see that I trust you?" She raised her tear-streaked face to look at him, craning her neck, "I want-"

He silenced her with a kiss. He dipped his arm and lifted her high as he stepped towards the bed. His tongue parted her lips and she clung to his hair as she pulled him in. She felt her world tilt as he laid them across the bed and felt his weight press along the length of her body.

His hand trailed up her thigh as he pulled back to look at her. "I know this is real, Hermione," he whispered to her. His fingers flexed into the flesh of her thigh, "I want this with you." He pressed into her core. They were only separated by the thin cotton of her knickers and the rough terry cloth of his towel. She felt his desire for her, and it made her entire body throb. Her body had a mind of its own. It was confusing she could still desire him so completely while her emotions and insecurities ran rampant.

A fresh tear trickled down her cheek and whispered in a trembling voice, "but not as your mate?"

His brow furrowed as if he were trying to keep from succumbing to tears himself, "No, I want that too." He kissed her cheek wiping away her tears with his lips. "I want you to know that this is real. Bond or not. I'm not saying no. I'm just saying not right now. Not until we're both ready."

She nodded as a torrent of tears fell down her face and she pulled at his neck until he kissed her. It was enough. More than enough.

His hands roamed her body as slowly as he pursued her mouth. His tongue delved deep before he pulled back enough to suck her lip in between his. He released it before he started the process all over again. He was savoring her. Her body felt raw to his touch. He moved his hand slowly from her hair to her shoulders. She tingled as his hand slid down her back to her thighs. He raised her thigh to wrap around his back before he pushed her shirt up over her breasts.

She groaned as his mouth left hers, but it was only a moment before he had her bra pulled down and his mouth wrapped around the entirety of her breast. Her hands tightened in his hair as he sucked her breast into his mouth and slowly released her until only the tip of her nipple was between his lips.

"God, Remus," she cried out as she felt the tip of his tongue flick against her nipple. She was overwhelmed by the newfound knowledge of how the simple act made her entire body tremble in desire. Her hands tightened in his hair never wanting to let him move from that spot.

The tension of her bra across her chest gave way and he pulled back to move her shirt from her with practiced hands. Her chest heaved as she watched him kneel between her thighs drinking her in. His hand circled her waist as she raised her hips. He moved her skirt and knickers slowly down her thighs never taking his eyes off of her. The intensity of his stare made her tremble. She lowered her hips back to the bed and raised her feet feeling exposed watching him remove the last of her clothes from her body.

His eyes trailed down her body until he found her glistening center. His hands pulled at his towel and it fell away behind him on the bed. The desire she felt at the sight of him rolled through her body. The memory of their last coupling was still fresh in her mind. As he looked back at her, his voice was dark with desire, "I want you like this, Hermione. No pull from the bond. Not the wolf taking control. Not the heat of mating. Just you."

She nodded, "I want that, too."

He leaned over her pressing his burly chest into hers. He kissed her softly as he pulled her thigh to wrap around him. He shifted her hip just enough to where the tip of his cock found her entrance.

She deepened their kiss and held him tightly as she felt him press into her. He rocked softly with just the tip eliciting a deep groan from her lips. As she felt him press into her completely her eyes opened wide to look into the soft jade green of his eyes. He stilled inside of her and kissed the tip of her nose. He held them still as his hand trailed down her side caressing her skin while the nuzzled the tips of their noses together.

Hermione studied his face raising her hand to his jaw. She wanted to explore him as much as he was exploring her. She trailed her finger along the line of his jaw before she traced the line of his lips. The growth of his beard over the last few weeks made her smile, "I'm sure Sirius loves this on you."

"It's just us right now. Just us." His words were warm on her lips.

She repeated him, testing how it sounded on her lips, "Just us." She felt his cock flex inside of her at her words. "Is that okay?" For the first time, the smallest hint of guilt crept up on her. Sirius was out there protecting her parents. She was in his house, in his bed, with his lover's cock buried deep inside of her.

His arms moved to tighten around her shoulders and waist pulling her closer to him. He kissed her lips before whispering, "Yes, it's okay. Does it bother you to think of Sirius and me together when you're not around?"

She blushed. The thought had crossed her mind so many times over the last few weeks. She shook her head. Often, she had found herself daydreaming about the pair of wizards. She hardly ever starred in her daydreams. After watching them together, after seeing them, it was forever burned into her mind.

She raised her hips until she felt the friction she needed.

He groaned and dropped his head to her shoulder. She started to protest as he began to sit up and pull out of her, but he hushed her with a soft kiss. Hermione was confused as he laid down on his side beside her and lifted her legs to drape over thighs.

"Like this," he said softly. He pulled her to him cradling her in his arms. He reentered her slowly and she immediately understood the advantage of the position of practically being in his lap as his hand traveled between her thighs, his mouth found her own, and he moved shallowly into her.

She groaned into his mouth as his hips flexed under her and his fingers worked in soft circles around her sensitive nub. She felt her orgasm approach in soft waves and crested slowly. She grasped his arm tightly and panted his name into his mouth. As the waves receded, she slid her hand to his wrist to halt his movements.

He acquiesced to her unspoken request and stilled his fingers. His tongue delved into her mouth as he continued his shallow movements. He cupped her softly as her legs trembled.

As her heart rate stilled his fingers began to move again. Even more softly than he had before.

"Remus, you don't have to," she whispered into his mouth. She felt silly even as she said it. She desired to see what he could give her. What he could make her body do again.

Hot shame flooded her as she thought of Victor while Remus poured his devotion out to her. All her bumbling attempts as a fifteen-year-old filtered through her mind. The single-mindedness of a teenage boy that thought of her pleasure only as an afterthought. The pressure of trying to please someone else only to be left wanting. The disappointment in herself that she had only stopped shy of actual sex with him when she knew she should have drawn a line sooner. The relief she felt when he had finally left Hogwarts.

"Shhh," he cooed to her as he continued to coax her to desire again.

But the attention he was giving to her was overwhelming. The insecure voice in her head told her that it was all too much. That she didn't deserve so much pleasure. That coming once from his hand was more than enough.

"Look at me."

Her eyes opened as he stared down at her. If she had any doubts before they were washed away. Jade green eyes bore into hers with only love and admiration.

An eternity passed as she looked upon his face. The passage of time only conveyed by the small moments of hitched breathing, soft kisses, and trembling limbs each time he brought her to completion.

By the time her fourth orgasm tumbled through her, tears poured down her face, her toes and hands tingled, and her legs went from trembling to full-on shaking. Only then he allowed himself less measured movements as buried himself more surely than before. He came with a groan never once looking away from her face.

Blissful calm carried her to sleep wrapped in the warm embrace of her lover. Her wolf. Her Remus.

"Black?"

Sirius clutched his chest as he listened to the last person in the world he ever expected to utter his name in concern.

"Fuck off, Snape," as he straightened himself. He tried and failed to look unaffected. "It's nothing."

A dark eyebrow raised itself and thin lips pursed not believing him. Snape, however, didn't say anything else. Their tentative alliance didn't go any deeper than the goals they shared.

He took hold of the portkey held in Snape's hand. The tug behind his navel did nothing to dispel the warmth that spread from the middle of his chest.

There was only a passing nod between the two. They acknowledged to each other, reluctantly, their thanks to the other for making it back to London safely. They disapparated quickly to their own locations. Not spending an unnecessary moment in each other's company.

As Sirius stood at the secret kept Grimmauld place and looked upon the door to his childhood home, he smiled. It was the first and only time he could remember feeling peace standing on the threshold. His hand shook as he turned the knob and entered the decrepit house. The pack bond pulsed through him stronger than he had ever felt before.

His face stung as he held back tears. For the first time in his life, in his thirty-seven years, he knew. He knew what he had never known before. A feeling he had never had before but understood it completely as soon as he felt it. He was home.

A/N: I can't begin to express how much I have loved reading everyone's reviews. Thank you so much for all the support everyone has given me. Every comment, follow, favorite, kudo, bookmark and share have all meant the world to me. You are all so lovely. I can only apologize for taking two weeks to update. I knew how I wanted this chapter to go and it took a while to get the mood and dynamic between Remus and Hermione just right. I hope it came across the way I intended and that you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it.