Never a morning person, Gloria was extra tired on this particular day. After a late night of talking down an anxious Galina over the phone, she would have liked to have a bit of a sleep in. She had tried tempting Julio and Benny with some cartoons in her bed when they rose at the crack of dawn, like always, and immediatley began to call for her. However, minutes later they were begging for breakfast and she'd had to take them out to the kitchen before they disturbed her mother and the girls.

"Want?" Benny offered sweetly, holding out a gummy cheerio that he had just removed from his own mouth.

"No, thank you, baby," Gloria chuckled, tapping her finger against the tray of his high chair which was sprinkled with cereal. "That's for you."

Benny's angelic expression shifted into a glare at her rejection. He held out his hand and then released his pincher grip. "Bye, bye," he said proudly, watching as the cheerio fell to the floor and rejoined the rest of his tossed food.

"Ewww, Julio, don't eat that!" Elena said in disgust, walking into the kitchen in her pink fluffy robe and slippers. Gloria leaned over to look under the table just in time to watch Julio pluck the gummy cheerio up and pop it in his mouth.

"Why don't you just ask for a bowl of your own?" Gloria asked him.

"I'm a puppy!" Julio replied, crouched down by her feet. "Ruff, ruff."

"Grandma has a real puppy," Elena reminded him, pulling up the chair beside her mother. "His name is Jasper and he's soo cute."

"I am a cute real puppy!" Julio protested.

"Very cute," Gloria assured him, reaching her hand down to stroke back his hair and scratch him behind his ears like a real dog. Julio stuck out his tongue and pretended to pant, just as a piercing whistle from the kettle filled the apartment.

"Do you want some tea, honey?" Gloria offered, as Julio held his hands over his ears and Benny clapped his hands excitedly at the noise.

"Sure," Elena nodded. "The raspberry one from last time."

"That's my favourite, too," Gloria smiled. She stood up on tiptoe and was sentimental in selecting Elena's favourite mug out of the cupboard.

"How do you feel about your history test today?" Gloria asked casually, as she placed two teabags into the cups and then began to pour the hot water over top.

"Grandma helped me study last night before bed," Elena replied, criss-crossing her legs onto the chair and then reaching for a banana from the fruit bowl in the center of the table.

"That's good," Gloria murmurred, bringing two mugs to the table and then silently passing Elena the sugar bowl. She had been busy doing baths, stories, and bed for the boys while Milagra had enjoyed some more quality time with the girls who had been attached to her hip since she'd gotten there.

"Is it okay if Grandma picks me up from school early today?" Elena asked, adding a heaping teaspoon of sugar to her tea and stirring it enthusiastically.

"No," Gloria said automatically. She took a sip of her tea and wrinkled her nose, before sliding the sugar bowl back towards herself.

"Nothing happens in the afternoon besides gym and art," Elena complained. "I can miss one day. Isn't Ceci going with you to the trial anyway?"

"We decided to skip that," Gloria replied calmly. She took a second sip of her tea now with the added sugar and then moistened her lips. "I don't see the sense in being there. We can be supportive later and I told Ceci to bring home Nicky's last few assignments so she can be all caught up when she goes back to school."

"Red will let her go back to actual class?" Elena asked.

"I assume so," Gloria shrugged. "But let's just get through this day first. No skipping out of school early. You guys can do whatever you want after school."

"Fine," Elena conceded with a sigh. She looked down when she felt the tug of a little hand on her robe.

"I want a banana too," Julio told her in a dramatic whisper.

"puppies don't eat bananas," Elena told him, cracking the peel of hers open. She took a single bite and then rolled her eyes at the way her brother was whimpering.

"Oh, here," she gave in, passing the banana for him to eat down under the table.

Julio nudged it back with his hand and sniffed. "You ate that one," he said is disgust.

"Seriously?" Elena blinked. "You were eating Benny's slobbery cheerios off of a dirty floor."

"Hey, leave my floors alone," Gloria protested, as Ceci walked into the kitchen already dressed for school with Milagra at her heel.

"Unless you're going to wash them," Milagra added with a tease, leaning over to kiss Elena's cheek. "Good morning, my love. Did you ask your mother about this afternoon?"

"Yes," Elena sighed. "She said no."

Milagra nodded her head silently and turned to the counter to select her own tea bag and a plain blue mug from the cupboard. "I just thought they could use some distraction," she finally said to Gloria. "They're both so worried about their friend."

"I know," Gloria agreed, focusing her eyes on Ceci and giving her a gentle smile. "Hopefully Nicky will be walking to school with you tomorrow again."

"Hopefully," Ceci agreed softly.

"If she goes to juvie can we visit her?" Elena asked bluntly.

"Think positive thoughts," Gloria told her, lifting her mug to her lips for another sip. "But yes. If it comes to that."

"It won't," Milagra said confidently. "And let's not let it spoil today. Gloria, I really think you should let me have the girls this afternoon."

"Mom-" Gloria closed her eyes.

"You have to work and I'll be bored all by myself," Milagra complained. "The girls want to show me more of their favourite places in the city."

"But what difference would a few hours make?" Gloria protested, sensing that she was losing the battle.

"Exactly," Milagra said, as though that settled everything. "It won't make a lick of difference. They're smart girls, Gloria, and they deserve to have some fun."

XXX

The lights in Gloria's apartment were already out Galina could see from the sidewalk, but that didn't mean anything. Living in a small apartment meant making the whole thing dark if you wanted to have any luck putting little ones to bed. Julio and Benny were probably already sleeping and Gloria and the girls were just quietly living their lives around them.

Ordinarily, Galina would not show up on anyone's doorstep at this late hour. At least not without an invitation. However, these were not normal circumstances. Galina had been alternating between shock and horror ever since their court appearance that morning. She'd been pacing and cleaning, and when her sons finally gave up on trying to console her and she failed to eat more than two bites of the meal that her daughter-in-law had prepared, she went to lie down on Nicky's bed and finally surrendered to sobbing tears she had been fighting back all day.

A red glow from the light of Gloria's cigarette gave away her position, as Galina drew nearer and could make out her silhouette sitting in the swing on her balcony. She saw Gloria bring the cigarette to her lips as their eyes locked. She hadn't heard from her all day. Not even a text to ask what the verdict was. She supposed her friend hadn't wanted to impose and was waiting for her to reach out first, which Galina had been dreading having to do. She didn't want to have to recant what had happened before the judge and in the aftermath. She didn't want to talk about it, and had been snapping at Dmitri and her other kids when they tried to make her.

"Door is unlocked," Gloria called down to her, and relief swelled in Galina's lungs making it a little bit easier to breathe. Gloria knew she wouldn't be walking by herself at night if she still had a daughter at home to take care of. She didn't need an explanation. As Galina let herself through the door and hurried up the stairs to join Gloria on the balcony, she could feel her eyes burning again. Even though it was a relief to finally be around someone who understood.

"Should I have called?" Gloria asked sympathetically, as Galina sank down beside her on the porch swing.

Galina shook her head, leaning forward with her head in her hands, nails piercing into the skin on her face. She used her feet to rock them slowly back and forth. Gloria's legs had been tucked up beneath her but she extended them now, pushing her toes into the pavement. Both women were silent and the sounds from the city was all that was heard.

"I can't believe this is happening," Galina finally spoke.

"I'm so sorry that it is," Gloria replied.

"She was crying when they took her out," Galina shuddered. "I didn't even get to walk with her. They made me say goodbye in there."

"I really thought things were going to work out," Gloria said quietly. "She's really been smartening up, and that's all thanks to you. You've been such a good mother to her."

"A little too late," Galina sniffed.

"You haven't even had her that long," Gloria reminded with a small smile. "I don't think you should blame yourself for anything."

"I should have paid more attention sooner," Galina said wistfully. "I won't even get to see her until visitation on Saturday and I have no clue if she is okay."

"Can she call you?" Gloria asked.

"I sent her money as soon as Dmitri and I left the courthouse," Galina replied. "But I don't know how long that will take to process."

"I'd like to send her some money too so she can call Ceci," Gloria said. "I don't want them to lose touch. Their friendship means so much for the both of them."

"That would be nice," Galina said, touched as she instinctively reached for Gloria's hand and squeezed it tightly. "In five months I can bring her home. Judge didn't want to change custody. They'll probably still process the adoption for us. I think they want Nicky out of their hair and am glad someone is willing to take responsibility for her."

"Well, that's good news, isn't it?" Gloria squeezed her hand back even more tightly. "Honestly, maybe there is some good to be said in all of this. Five months really isn't that long, and maybe it's an important lesson for Nicky to learn. That her mama loves her more than life itself and will stand by her through anything, but that doesn't mean she can expect to be bailed out of every situation she puts herself in."

"Fair enough," Galina hiccuped. "Though if I had my way I would have bailed her out of this, and anything else that came along."

"Oh, I have no doubt," Gloria smirked. "And you tried your hardest."

"I'm just so worried," Galina sighed.

"Nicky is a strong girl," Gloria reminded her. "And she's been through this before. Honestly, I'm more worried about you. I think you will feel much better once you get to see her on Saturday."

"Saturday cannot come any sooner," Galina agreed, leaning as deeply into the back of the

swing as she could, closing her eyes as Gloria continued to rock them back and forth. They spent several minutes in this tranquil silence. Both lost in heavy thoughts of her own. Then Galina turned to her and squeezed her hand once again.

"Maybe Ceci and Elena could come with me when I go?" Galina asked hopefully. "I think Nicky would like that."

"Sure," Gloria agreed. "I'll have to ask them later. They aren't home right now."

Galina pressed her lips together. "Where are they?" she finally asked. She had wondered why the apartment was so dark and quiet. It was still too early for the girls to be in bed and Milagra wasn't around either.

"Out with Grandma," Gloria replied, and then clicked her tongue impatiently. "She took the girls out of school early today and they're still off galavanting around the city."

"If you don't want her taking the girls out of school early then put your foot down," Galina advised. "You're their mother. What you say goes."

"Well, I don't know if that really works in this case," Gloria sighed.

She didn't want to admit how afraid she was to push. She hadn't seen Milagra engage with her daughters since they were little girls. She'd underestimated just how connected the three of them were and how much presence counted for. That even if Gloria thought she was making tremendous growth in her relationship with her daughters, there were parts of them that she would never know. The parts that Milagra had nurtured and raised. Gloria didn't want to be this way, but insecurity had been increasing within her every single time she saw Ceci and Elena with their grandmother.

"Being a mom is the hardest thing," Gloria confessed, and Galina, whose own hand had begun shaking so erratically in Gloria's grasp, nodded her head in agreement. Both of them, like any mother who had ever existed, was constantly questioning whether what they did was enough and if there mistakes could be forgiven.

"I feel the same way," Galina replied, and it was both disheartening and comforting to realize that as different as they were, and as different as their children were, they both struggled. It was just the way it was.

"I'll talk to the girls about going to visit Nicky tomorrow," Gloria promised her.

"Thanks," Galina replied, pushing the swing back again with the balls of her feet. She glanced at Gloria through the corner of her eye. "Do you want me to get out of here? It is getting late."

"No," Gloria shook her head. "You can stay," she smiled. "To be honest I don't really want to be waiting up for them all alone."

"Good," Galina said contentedly, "I didn't really want to leave." She moved a bit closer to Gloria on the swing and settled back more deeply into a comfortable position. It was the first time she felt like she'd been able to breathe normally all day, and it would have to be enough.

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