A/N: Well…now what?
Disclaimer: I don't own Chuck
"Lou, what is the problem?" Big Mike asked. Lou looked over at Big Mike, and as Quinn turned to do the same, she gave the police chief a wink.
"This money, it's counterfeit," she said, making a big production out of things.
"I'm telling you, it ain't counterfeit," Quinn retorted. "I'd know if it was," he said, under his breath.
"Well, what should we do then?" Big Mike asked. "Call the Feds? Should I hold him here, until they can get here?"
"Over ten dollars?" Quinn asked. "First I tried to use my credit card, she said it came back stolen."
"Stolen?" Big Mike asked.
"Stolen," Lou replied. She neglected to mention it had not, actually, come back stolen, as she had chosen not to run it.
"Then I tried to pay her cash, and she said it was all counterfeit," Quinn continued, giving Lou a look like she was crazy.
Roan, sitting at a table a few feet away, heard the whole thing. He smiled at his date, Diane Beckman, and sent a text. Back at Chuck and Sarah's house – well, technically it was still Chuck and Ellie's, but everyone, including Ellie, was calling it Chuck and Sarah's – Chuck saw the text, started the truck, and with Sarah headed toward the Robert's farm.
"You okay?" Sarah asked him.
Chuck nodded. "It's time to end this," Chuck replied.
}o{
The three walked up on the pen that held the rabid dogs. "We need to put those poor creatures out of their misery," Chuck said softly.
"What you need to do, is die," Shaw said, holding a gun on Cal, Chuck, and Sarah.
"You'll never get the land that way," Chuck replied with a shrug.
"I don't need to," Shaw replied with a shrug. "All I have to do is make you go missing. I've learned things since being here." A gun went off, and Cal dropped to the ground.
Chuck and Sarah stood there, in shock. Shaw turned, and found Jill behind him, holding a pistol. "I tried and tried to warn him," she said, no sadness or remorse in her voice.
"You just killed your father, you lunatic!" Chuck said, wanting to check on Cal, but wary of the guns pointed at him. "What is wrong with you?"
"What's wrong with me? What's wrong with you?!" Jill screamed, her eyes full of madness. "You know what it's like to rely on others, and it gets you nothing! I control my life! ME!"
"You picked a mentally stable one there, Shaw," Sarah said, shaking her head. Shaw pointed his pistol at her. "Is that how you solve everything, by killing?"
He shrugged. "Yeah, it's worked so far."
"This whole thing is FUBAR!" Chuck yelled the last word, and dual shots went off. The guns flew out of both Jill's and Shaw's hands. "Jill, the thing you're wrong about is, I do rely on others, and they've never let me down."
Shaw screamed in rage, and charged Chuck. A rifle went off again, the round impacting near Shaw's foot as he ran, making him stumble. Chuck ducked down and, as he felt Shaw's body make contact, he raised up, flipping Shaw over his back. Chuck, proud of himself, straightened, turned, and expected to see the other man on the ground behind him. What Chuck forgot was that the dog pen was behind him. He heard the growls, the screams, and turned away as the two crazed dogs dove at Shaw.
Jill screamed in anger, and started towards Chuck. Her arms were outstretched, like she meant to push him over, causing Chuck to join Shaw. A right fist streaked across her face, and she dropped to the ground, as it connected directly with her jaw.
Chuck turned to Sarah, and then looked down at Jill. "Damn, you are such a bad ass." He suddenly remembered Cal. "Cal!" he yelled, turning. Cal was slowly getting up. "You okay?"
"I'm sure glad you convinced me to wear that Kevlar," he said. "How'd you know?"
"I didn't… I figured Shaw would try on one on us, though. I'm just glad it wasn't a head shot," Chuck admitted. "We got lucky." Chuck looked at dog pen, and the dead man who had bled out from the ripped throat the dogs had inflicted on him. "Very lucky."
}o{
"If you don't mind, I do have plans for this afternoon," Chuck said, his hands on the sow's abdomen, palpating. "And I really need to take a shower beforehand."
"I'll say," came the voice behind him, making him freeze.
"STOP!" Chuck barked. "I'm not allowed see the bride before the wedding!"
"Chuck, I'm in clothes to help you deliver piglets. I'm not in my wedding finery," Sarah reminded him, humor in her voice.
"I'm really making an impression on your mom, aren't I?"
"You are, but not the bad one you think you are," Sarah told him, squatting down beside him. "Is she in distress?"
"Nope, just cold and in no hurry to have them," Chuck replied. "Piglets are fine. I know we're under a time crunch, but-"
"Chuck… pigs first, then the wedding," Sarah said giving him a grin. "I get it."
It was the Saturday after Thanksgiving, and the day of Chuck and Sarah's wedding. After checking everyone's calendars, it had seemed the perfect day to have a wedding. However, someone forgot to tell this sow, that was currently in labor. That, or she was upset at not receiving an invitation.
"Most women wouldn't be okay with this, on their wedding day," Chuck began.
"Jill," Sarah replied. "You mean Jill." Chuck grinned, his head ducked down. "And you didn't make this pig go into labor… did you?"
"Yep, you caught me. I was so against marrying the smartest, kindest, sweetest, funniest, most compassionate woman I've ever met in my life, who I've basically lived with as my wife for the past several months, that I snuck down here and gave this pig 250 milligrams of cloprostenol, just to avoid marrying you," Chuck said, fighting to not roll his eyes.
"The whole thing sounds sketchy," she said, narrowing her eyes at him. "So, who's this other woman you're apparently marrying today, because the person you described is definitely not me."
Chuck stood to his full height, and she stood with him, a smirk on her face. "Listen here, missy," he said.
"Yeah, buster?" she said, stepping toward him.
"Will you two please not mix your peanut butter and chocolate while my hogs are farrowing?" Casey pleaded, having walked up to the barn door. "You two have to go. Ellie is gonna kill me."
"No, I'm not," Ellie said, startling Casey, who hadn't seen her come up behind him. "It's what they do; I get it. We should have made sure there was someone on call to be here."
"No wedding?" Casey asked, and they all heard the regret in his voice.
"Oh, they are getting married," Ellie assured him.
Chuck turned to Sarah. "If you want out, you better run now, from the sound of it."
"I'm not going anywhere," Sarah replied, giving him a soft peck on the lips. "Now quit gawking at me. We have piglets to help farrow."
}o{
It was dark as they walked up the drive from the barn to Casey's house. "Oh, did I tell you that Big Mike said that Quinn has turned State's evidence on at least fifteen members of the crime family?"
"He sure was talkative," Sarah replied, fighting a yawn. "Any word on Jill?"
"You mean since she got shanked in prison?" Chuck asked. Sarah turned away, her shoulders shaking with laughter. "I don't know who put her in the same prison as Shaw's wife… or would that be, widow?"
"Widow," Sarah replied, still laughing.
Chuck grinned at her. "I mean, apparently Evelyn was not forgiving of Jill having an affair with Shaw."
"Did she know that going in?" Sarah asked. "That Shaw was married?"
"Did Evelyn care?" Chuck responded, making Sarah laugh even harder.
"You two," came Ellie's voice, coming from the sidewalk leading to front porch of Casey's.
"The heavy's here," Chuck whispered to Sarah.
"Have you smelled yourself, 'cause you a little heavy, if you know what I mean," Sarah replied.
"Come on, Sarah," Ellie said, taking her and leading her off. "You're getting married."
"Are there shotguns involved?" Chuck asked, grinning. The grin faltered at Ellie's glare. "Yes, ma'am," he responded.
"Don't show weakness," Devon said, walking up to Chuck.
"Oh, you finally figured that out?" Chuck asked Devon.
"I mean, I did. I still do, mind you, but I figured it out."
}o{
The Roberts front yard was decorated simply, every chair filled with what appeared to be the entire population of Sadie, as Chuck stood in front of them all.
"You can still run, you know," Morgan whispered from his officiant spot.
"Why in the world would I want to?" Chuck asked. Morgan gave him a nod of approval. The music began, and everyone turned to see Sarah being led down the aisle by her mom.
"Very progressive," Morgan said.
"It's Sarah. That's her, and they better get used to it," Chuck replied with a shrug.
"They have," Morgan said, looking out over the crowd and seeing all the smiling faces. "They have."
}o{
There were bonfires, the yard was lit with lamps and torches, and barbeque was flowing. Hayrides were offered for the kids, people were toasting marshmallows, and it was a joyous occasion.
"Don't look now, but Diane and Roan are eating barbeque together," Chuck said to Sarah.
"Is she having the pecan pie?" Sarah asked.
"I'm not sure, but Roan hasn't looked at one other lady the entire night. And I've really not seen him look at anyone since they started…" Chuck looked around, and Sarah joined him. He leaned his head towards hers. "Since they started…" he glanced around again, quickly, "…dating."
Sarah gasped in faux shock. "The scandal!"
"I think that will be later tonight, and then again tomorrow, when neither is in church," Chuck said.
"Having a religious experience in their bedroom?" Sarah asked, as Chuck was taking a drink of tea.
He sputtered and nearly spilled it on himself, as Sarah smirked and chuckled, clearly proud of herself.
"Trying to collect on some kind'a life insurance, now that we're married?"
"Keeping you on your toes, dear," she replied.
"That's a new position," he said, just as she took a drink, causing her to nearly spill hers.
"Truce?" she asked, grinning.
"Why, we both know you'll break it the second it's convenient."
She shrugged. "But you love me anyway."
"Gosh darn it, I do," he replied, both laughing.
They each felt a hand on their far shoulders, and a head appeared between theirs. "I'm proud of you two."
"Morgan, while I am happy to hear that, why are you proud of us?" Chuck asked. "I am assuming you're as curious as I am?" he asked Sarah.
"Probably more so," she said with a wink.
He sighed happily, ignoring the two. "You two crazy kids made this work, when you had every reason not to."
"But I had one overwhelming reason to make it work," Chuck said.
"Me too," Sarah added. Morgan grinned, straightened, removed his hands, and tugged on his coat lapels, proud of himself. They watched him strut off. Sarah leaned over. "So, this thing on your toes?"
"Yessssss?" Chuck asked.
"What will the dogs think?"
Chuck made a show of thinking and then gave her a look. "I don't think they'll look us in the eye for a week." She laughed, raising her glass to him, and they clinked them together.
"Sarah, is that sweet tea?"
"Mmmhmm," she hummed.
"I thought Sarah Walker didn't drink sweet tea."
"Sarah Walker doesn't," she replied. "But Sarah Bartowski loves it." Chuck roared with laughter.
A/N: Hey, thanks for stopping by Sadie. Mind the speed limit on the way home, and come on back now, you hear? See you soon. Reviews, PMs, Fingerpistols, whatever, they're all appreciated (WASH YO HANDS!)