"Six grand? I'm supposed to believe that a stranger is going to pay me six grand and not expect to sleep with me?"

"She's not looking for a prostitute, Jayje, she's looking for a date."

"Six grand...for a date."

"A long weekend date, two hours away, with a significant amount of lying."

"Right."

"Look, if you're not into it, I'll just tell her-"

"And how do you know her again?"

"I helped her set up her home security stuff, did some work for her around internet identity…"

"Sketchy stuff?"

"No! God, what do you think? That I would hook you up with a psycho?"

"No! No, I know you wouldn't...knowingly. I just...Six grand is a lot of money."

"For us, buttercup. For her, it's almost nothing."

"Be serious."

"I am being serious. The security stuff I put in her house two years ago was all top of the line. We're talking fifteen, twenty thousand dollars. And she didn't even bat an eye. And she paid me double my normal commission to do it off the books."

"Wow."

"Look, JJ, if you're uncomfortable, we can drop it. I only brought it up because of that stuff you said about Will. If you really want to leave him, this money would go a long way to-"

"No, you're right. I'm sorry...I just got freaked out at the idea that someone would pay for a date and not want anything messed up."

"A long weekend date. With another woman. Who is big on discretion"

"Yeah. Yeah, okay...well...okay. I could meet her, right? And if I didn't like her I could just...walk away. Right?"

"Yes, no commitment at all. Also, afterward if you never want to see her again, you don't have to."

"What do you mean, if?"

"What? Nothing! I just mean if you don't want to stay friends or in touch."

"Penelope Garcia, look me in the eyes and tell me this is not some sort of matchmaker plot that you have cooking."

"This is not some sort of matchmaker plot. I swear."

"You'd better."

"So you'll meet her."

"Yes. But you're coming with me."

…

…

They are scheduled to meet the next Friday at a trendy cafe in the heart of DC, and as she and Penelope walk up to the entrance, JJ thinks she can hear her own heartbeat like a bass drum on the street.

"I bet she's already here," Penelope says as she holds the door to the cafe open for JJ. "She's super punctual."

JJ presses her palms to her thighs and considers backing out for the fifth time in the last three minutes. Penelope glances at her and seems to read her thoughts.

"She's not a murderer or a pervert or a sociopath, JJ, I swear to God! If anything, she's maybe a little too formal with people she's just met."

"Sociopath could also apply to pervert and murderer, you know," The voice behind JJ makes them both spin. "So...It might be better to say something like, 'she's not a sociopath,' and leave it at that."

The woman standing behind them is tall, with dark brown hair and deep brown eyes. She has spoken in an even, monotone voice, but the corners of her mouth suggest the beginnings of a smirk.

Garcia pulls her into a hug with a squeal.

"Emily Prentiss!" she says. "It's so good to see you again! You keep blowing off my girls' nights!"

Emily, for her part, does not appear to know what to do with this outsized show of affection. She pats Penelope on the back awkwardly but doesn't hug back. Her eyes fall on JJ.

"I am not a girl's night type of person," she says mildly.

JJ finds herself smiling. She watches as Emily extracts herself gently from Penelope's clutches and holds out her hand.

"Jennifer, right?"

"JJ," she corrects, "No one calls me Jennifer, really."

"Why not?" Emily asks, and she seems genuinely curious.

"Oh, um, My last name is Jareau? And I guess it just sort of...became a habit?" everything that comes out of her mouth goes up at the end like a question, making her sound like an idiot. She blushes a little, but Emily doesn't seem to notice. The hostess returns to the front at that moment, and Emily turns to give the name of the reservation.

They settle into a booth toward the back of the cafe, and JJ picks up a menu for something to do.

"Do you prefer it?" Emily asks, looking at her intently.

"Prefer…" JJ frowns. "Oh, JJ to Jennifer?"

Emily nods.

"Oh…" Does she? When was the last time anyone asked her that question? "I...don't really know. I certainly don't mind it, but prefer?" She thinks for a bit longer. "I guess I'm not sure. No one's ever really asked me."

Emily nods, as though this is a perfectly respectable answer, and then looks down at her own menu.

"Lunch is on me," she says without looking up. "Obviously. As a thank you for even considering my proposition."

JJ bites her lip. "About that," she begins but breaks off when the waiter comes over to take their drink orders. When he's left, she opens her mouth again, but Emily cuts her off.

"I know it must seem very unorthodox. Probably even a little creepy. I…" she hesitates and looks unsure for the first time. "You can ask me anything you like and I'll answer honestly.

"Why?" JJ blurts before she can stop herself. "What's it for?"

Emily glances at Penelope before answering. "My mother is currently the American Ambassador to the Slovak Republic. Slovakia. She and my father are hosting President Čaputová and her children for a long weekend at their estate in Loudoun County."

She pauses, but neither JJ nor Penelope interrupt.

"I've been informed that not attending would be the height of disrespect," Emily continues. "And that to attend without a date would be tantamount to social suicide. So I'm looking for someone to go with me to this three-day event and poses as my partner."

Emily glances at JJ. "The event is next weekend, and I would, of course, cover all of your travel expenses, your clothing, any petcare you needed while you were gone, etc."

"And no sex, right?" Garcia pipes up, smile wide, and both Emily and JJ gape at her.

"PEN!" JJ says when she can find her voice.

"What?" Penelope asks innocently. "You were skeptical, I just want to make sure-"

"No," Emily says quickly. She's gone a little red as well. "No sex. I might…" another quick glance at JJ. "Hold your hand or ask you to dance. Most likely I will take your coat when we arrive, perhaps put an arm around your shoulders? But nothing more physical than that. And not even that if you're not comfortable. Lord knows my parents won't be."

This last sentence catches enough of JJ's attention to pull her from her humiliation.

"Your parents don't like that you're gay?"

Emily fixes her with wide, dark eyes, and just like that, the embarrassment returns full force.

"I didn't mean to assume," she says, fighting the urge to bury her face in her hands. "I - ah - I just meant like...they wouldn't approve of you bringing a woman to-"

But Emily's face breaks open and she laughs. It's real and genuine, and it makes her face look soft and young for the first time.

"Okay," she says easily. "Okay, part of why I want to bring a woman and not a man is because I know that it will needle them a little. Don't get me wrong," she says seeing the look on JJ's face, "I date almost exclusively females, but I wouldn't have trouble finding a man to go with me."

The waiter returns at that moment with their drinks, and after they order meals, they sit there silently, each lost in thought.

Emily has ordered a fancy coffee drink and wraps both of her hands around the mug in a nervous fashion. It makes JJ sort of like her.

"So, why are you offering to pay?" she asks finally. She doesn't mean to sound as harsh as she does.

Emily either doesn't notice or doesn't begrudge her tone of voice.

"I'm paying the cost of going because that only seems fair. I'm paying an additional sum because…" She pauses, thinking. "Well, for two reasons, I suppose. The first is that I want the other person to know it's serious. I'm not asking for something small and I know that." She pauses, considering her beverage, brow creases slightly.

"The second reason was that it would hopefully put the other person at ease. That she might see it was my money and my name I was willing to put out there and be more comforted by that fact."

She looks up at JJ with a wry smile. "But I can see how that might have come across as sociopathic."

And despite herself, JJ laughs.

"Anything else you'd like to know?" Emily asks.

"Do you work?"

"I do. I work for the government. Security."

"CIA?" JJ asks, half-joking.

"Not quite," Emily says, completely serious.

"Really?" JJ's eyes open wide. "Quantico?"

Emily nods. "Yes. But no shady military ops, I promise."

"Okay," JJ says slowly. That explains the security stuff Pen was talking about, she thinks. "Have you done this before?"

Emily sighs. "I have not," she says tiredly.

"Why?"

Another sigh. "It never seemed so...dire before. My mother never seemed so adamant that this was a necessity. Something about turning thirty, perhaps?"

"My parents considered me an old maid at 22," JJ says, nodding sympathetically. "I think that's why I'm in this situation today."

Emily takes a sip of her coffee. "Can I ask you something now?"

JJ nods, feeling more at ease.

"Are you married?"

The question catches JJ completely off guard. "What?" she asks. "Why would you...Why are you-"

"You're wearing a ring on your right ring finger. That usually-"

"Oh!" JJ looks down at the little gold band. She'd actually meant to remove it before coming here. She'd mean to remove it a lot of times before that as well.

"I'm...we're separated. It's...messy."

Emily blinks, digesting. "Would this make it messier?" she asks.

"No," JJ says, wondering if this is a lie. "Actually, the money would be helpful for me. It would make my situation less messy."

She doesn't know why they are being so cagey about this whole thing. She doesn't know why she doesn't just come out and say, "My husband is refusing me access to my son."

Again, it is hard to tell if Emily is disinterested or oblivious. "Alright," she says. "And six thousand sounds fair?"

Fair? It sounds like a dream. "Sure," JJ answers. Her voice wavers a little.

"I demand a finder's fee," Penelope cuts in. She is smiling like the Cheshire cat, and even Emily narrows her eyes when she takes in the other woman's expression.

"Oh yeah?" she asks lightly. "What are your terms."

"You have to come to one of our girls' nights," Garcia says, grinning more widely. "You owe me now. I'm basically saving your life."

Emily laughs again.

"Basically," she says, and she looks at JJ. "So what do you say, Jennifer? Would you like more time to think it over? I bet we can convince Garcia to wait until the end of your first bite at least."

Garcia fake pouts and JJ laughs. As if summoned by Emily's mentioning, their entrees arrive. To prove a point (though she isn't sure what that point is), she picks up her burger and takes big bite.

She means to chew in silence, letting the question hang, but she's unable to help herself.

"Holy shit, this is the best burger I've ever had in my life," she says.

Emily raises an amused eyebrow but doesn't comment.

Penelope, meanwhile, is practically vibrating in her seat.

JJ decides to put her out of her misery. "I'll go with you," she says, grinning. "It's a deal."

Penelope's squeal of excitement makes other diners turn to look in their direction.

Emily just smiles and picks up her own fork.