AN: Here's my contribution to the Fall in Love Fanfic Exchange hosted by Antigone2. This was written for the lovely ms cassieraven, and I hope you enjoy it!
A huge thanks to my beta/partner in crime/BFF FloraOne for all her help with encouragement keeps me going in this crazy time, and I appreciate you more than you know 333
Enjoy and let me know what you think!
oOo
Mamoru found it was much harder to come through the door and remove one's shoes when there was an overly-affectionate Moon Senshi hanging from your arm and refusing to let go.
"Usagi," he said, his eyes to the ceiling as he tried his best to not sound completely exasperated. "We need to get your shoes off."
She pouted up at him, and he felt his breath catch at the sight, but he felt the loss of her touch when she obeyed, letting go of his arm to haphazardly kick off her shoes before she firmly attached herself to him again.
He found himself being dragged towards his couch, and as soon as he'd sat down, Usagi was burrowing into his side, hugging him tightly, her arms barely big enough to reach around his middle.
"Uhh, how…how long did Ami say it would take for this to wear off?" Mamoru asked, completely torn between hugging her back and running towards the nearest train and never getting off.
Usagi sighed contentedly, apparently finding a spot that was agreeable. "Something like twelve hours."
Twelve hours. Easily enough time for someone to die of fright, want, or soul-crushing embarrassment.
"But what does it matter, Mamo-chan? I get to be with you," she went on, reaching up to place a lingering kiss on his cheek.
He blushed deeply at the contact and the nickname. But that killjoy voice in his head kept up the mantra he'd convinced himself he needed to remember.
She doesn't mean any of this. You can't give in to what you want. She doesn't mean any of this. You can't give in to what you want.
He was used to sparring with her in the streets and laughing at her antics at the arcade, but this...this was new. And wonderful, but also so very, very terrible.
"Usagi, you don't want this though," he turned towards her, and her brow furrowed adorably in confusion. "I mean, not really. It's just that stupid potion that's making you like this."
She shook her head vehemently. "No! No, Mamo-chan, I love you!"
His heart stopped. He literally forgot how to breathe as the words he had longed to hear from her spilled out of her mouth like she'd been dying to say them just as much.
He couldn't speak, he tried, but words were ridiculously hard at the moment.
"You love me too, don't you, Mamo-chan?" she asked softly, her hand coming up to stroke his cheek gently.
She flustered him on a normal day, when her cheeks flushed with anger from something stupid he'd said or when she was eating ice cream or on that rarest of occasion when he earned one of her coveted smiles.
He was stupid to think this affect wouldn't be magnifed a hundred fold while she was under the influence of God knows what, sitting on his couch, tucked neatly under his arm as if she belonged there. And how long had he wished for this exact thing?
His mouth was suddenly very dry, and he licked his lips. "Usa...I..."
Perhaps the biggest mistake he'd ever made was looking down into her eyes at that very moment.
They were so, endlessly blue, full of hope and joy and unabashed love. How could he possibly deny her what she wanted to hear? Especially when what she wanted to hear had been the truth since practically the day he met her.
"Of course I love you."
oOo
Whoever this enemy was, she was strong and scared them all witless.
She was dressed like a senshi, her dark green hair moved around her like water and her eyes flashed a deep garnet.
She never attacked, only ever defended, and seemed to have her sights set on Mamoru from the very beginning.
He cursed under his breath when she trapped him, back pressed against her, while her staff pinned him across his body. She was a few inches shorter than him, but it didn't seem to matter as he fought to escape her hold.
She growled in his ear while he struggled, "Stop moving, prince. You don't always have to make life so difficult."
He did stop struggling briefly, confused by her addressing of him and it was then that he felt a slight sting on the side of his neck.
The woman had stuck him with something, and he now found it impossible to move.
Panic welled up in him, as he remained standing but completely unable to move anything besides his eyes.
"Let him go!" he'd heard Sailor Moon cry out, running towards them until the very ground trembled in warning to not come closer.
When the stranger finally spoke out, her voice had an ancientness to it that caused a shiver to run down his spine.
"I will gladly do so, princess. I have just one requirement."
Sailor Moon looked at them strangely, looking around to see if there was someone there that hadn't been before. When she saw no one, she finally responded. "I'm not a princess."
He could feel the woman behind him smile, "As you wish."
oOo
Mamoru let his head fall against the microwave when he heard the bathroom door shut, hoping against all hope that the electromagnetic radiation might somehow seep into his brain and kill him now. Surely that wasn't too much to ask?
Except death didn't come. And instead he was left to watch the spinning cup of hot chocolate warm in his microwave.
He'd just admitted he was in love with Usagi. Something he'd sworn to himself he would never, ever do. And his resolve was only further strengthened by the fact that Usagi didn't even like him. Like, at all.
Sure, she tolerated him. He might even go so far as to say they were friends. But she had made it clear on any number of occasions that he was quite possibly the worst human being with a penis to ever walk the earth.
Of course, he was mostly responsible for this. Spouting off insults and calling her 'Odango Atama' at every turn when they'd first met.
But over the past two years, he'd tried to make up for that. Finally opening his eyes to the fact that the reason the tiny girl in front of him made his blood boil wasn't because he was annoyed by her, but because of something else entirely.
He'd started to be kind, and encouraging. Even offering to help her with homework every now and then. Praying to any and all gods that maybe, just maybe he might be able to salvage some tiny pit of her opinion of him. But there was always a hesitance there. He could feel it every time she was around him.
Unfortunately, his early words and actions appeared to have sealed his fate with Usagi, and Mamoru realized that not only was he doomed to love only her but also chained to a destiny that included her mere toleration of him.
She had only been sixteen when they'd met. Young and impressionable and heart on her sleeve, and the words he'd thrown at her had cut, he knew.
Then he'd discovered she was Sailor Moon. This crazy strong soldier of love and justice, he knew he'd been sunk for life. The only two women in his life to ever really catch his eye were one and the same, and she couldn't care less for him.
She still blushed when he would scoop her out of harm's way in a battle. Still looked at him with admiration and a sweet, "Thank you, Tuxedo Kamen-sama."
But that was as far as it went.
They'd been fighting this enemy for two years, searching in vain to find this mysterious moon princess that used to haunt his dreams, but with no luck. All he had to show for it were some killer scars and an all-consuming love for a girl who would never love him back.
And to add insult to injury, he and Rei had been having disturbing visions of a Silence that was coming. Fast and sure to destroy them all.
He let his head bang against the microwave, again.
Why had he agreed to bring Usagi here, exactly?
It was then that he felt her small arms snake around his middle, and her head lay gently against his back.
"I missed you, Mamo-chan."
Right. That whole love-potion-makes-it-impossible-to-be-seperated thing. Fuck.
"It's only been a couple of minutes," he ground out, opening the microwave and pulling out the mug, trying desperately to not enjoy the feeling of her against him.
He turned around in her hold, and gently extricated himself from her embrace to hand her the cup.
Usagi smiled up at him lovingly, gratefully taking the steaming cup of chocolate from him. "Two minutes too long."
Mamoru sighed and rolled his eyes to the ceiling, while he leaned back against the counter, grateful for the assistance in standing in that moment.
Usagi came around to lean against the counter too, their arms touching, while she gulped down the hot liquid with a speed that impressed him.
He flinched, wondering how she was escaping without her mouth burning. "Isn't that hot?"
Sighing in content, while slurping up the last bits of her drink, she looked up at him adoringly. "No, it was just right. You're such a good hot chocolate maker, Mamo-chan."
She then nuzzled her head against his shoulder, the sweet smell of her shampoo dancing in his nose, and he felt his knees grow weak from all of it.
"T-thanks."
They stood in silence for a few long minutes, the quiet stretching between them like a chasm, and the only sound that could be heard was the distinct tick of the clock and Usagi's occasional happy sighs.
He looked up eventually, when the point of the floor he'd been staring at began to blur. His eyes found the clock on the wall, startling him back to reality, when he realized it was nearly midnight.
"Usagi, it's getting late…"
"Mhmm." He felt her nod against his shoulder, and he looked down to see her eyes drooping. It had been a long day for all of them with both he and the girls in the midst of final exams.
"Do you want to go to bed?"
Usagi looked up and batted her eyelashes at him, her eyes suddenly dark. "What are you suggesting, Mamo-chan?" she asked, reaching up to run a finger down his chest.
Mamoru's mouth ran dry. "U-usagi!" he stuttered out, both scandalized and enticed, if he was being honest. But that couldn't happen. Period. He wouldn't so much as lay a finger on her until she was back to normal. Not that he'd lay one on her then either, unless she wanted, of course. Which she didn't, so he wouldn't. And…
Oh, boy.
"I just meant sleeping," he managed to say, and he could feel the heat still in full bloom on his cheeks. "I'll sleep on the couch and you can take the bed."
He wasn't prepared in the slightest for the response he received to the suggested sleeping arrangements.
"No!" she cried, jumping in front of him, eyes wild. She reached out and grabbed his arms in her hands, her grip as tight as any he'd ever felt. "It's too far!"
Mamoru felt his own eyes grow wide at her reaction. Unsure of how to respond, he stuttered out, "T-too far?"
Usagi nodded her head, biting down on her bottom lip, and he could see the tears welling up in her eyes. "I can't be that far away from you, it...it hurts too much."
Usagi cried all the time, of course. But tears like these, the kind that silently streaked down her cheeks while you could see her heart breaking in those endless blue eyes. He couldn't ever resist those.
"Oh, Usa…"
She flew into him, her face buried in his chest, while a muffled, "Please stay with me," floated up to his ears.
His response was inevitable, he knew, and it spilled from his lips far too easily, knowing full well he was so incredibly screwed.
"Of course I will, Usako."
oOo
"Please, you can't hurt him," he heard Sailor Moon plead, and he tried to open his mouth to tell her to run, it was ok, he was alright with this, but he couldn't move no matter how hard his brain screamed at his body to do so.
"I have no plans to hurt him, provided you do as I ask."
"Anything," Sailor Moon said, her eyes hard and her fists clenched at her sides.
"Sailor Moon, no!" he heard Mars yell, the other Senshi looking just as concerned as they quickly approached the scene. "You can't just agree to that, you idiot!"
But Sailor Moon shook her head, her eyes never wavering from him. "I can and I will."
She took a few steps forward, shaking off Mars' hand, while the rest of the Senshi all yelled their protests behind her. "What do I have to do?"
He felt the woman behind him smile again. "Catch."
A small vial with green liquid flew through the air, and to his surprise, Sailor Moon caught it without a fumble.
"What is this?" Sailor Moon asked, turing the glass over in her hands.
"That's none of your concern," the stranger said, her voice even and kind, though there was an edge to it that left him feeling that if she wasn't obeyed, there would be definite consequences. "All you have to do is drink it, and he goes free."
Sailor Moon looked back up, her eyes clashing with his, and he was sure the panic he felt, though now for a completely different reason, was evident.
She couldn't. He wouldn't allow it. Though how he could possibly stop her in his current state, still remained a mystery.
So he started a chant in his head, hoping somehow it might reach her telepathically.
You can't drink that. I'm not worth it. Save yourself.
But it seemed to have the opposite effect, as Sailor Moon removed the cork from the top of the vial and raised it to her lips.
"SAILOR MOON!" Mars called out again. "Stop! You can't be serious!"
Sailor Moon paused and turned to face her friend, something on her face causing Mars to stop dead in her tracks.
"It's ok. I trust her," he heard Sailor Moon say, before she raised the vial back to her lips and began to drink.
oOo
Usagi was making herself comfortable amongst his sheets and pillows when he finally got up the courage to emerge from the bathroom.
She looked far too comfortable dressed in one of his t-shirts that reached past her knees while she snuggled into what was normally the side of the bed he slept on.
He'd chosen a pair of sweatpants and a sweatshirt to wear to bed, covering every possible inch of skin he could, even if it meant he'd be a furnace all night long.
He met her eyes, trying to keep his panic from showing, and she patted the space next to her.
"Come on, Mamo-chan, I don't bite."
He laughed nervously, and scratched the back of your head. "I'm not exactly afraid of that, Odango."
Her nose wrinkled at the name. "Why are you calling me that? I liked Usako better."
His eyes widened. Had he called her that before? He'd only allowed that name to circle in his head for the past two years. Never once uttering it out loud.
Figures he would slip up within half an hour of her infiltrating his apartment.
"Mamo-chan, what's wrong? You're standing there like you've seen a ghost or something."
He realized then he was still rooted to the same spot near the door, and his feet felt like lead when he began to move slowly towards the bed.
He climbed slowly up, staying above the covers and as far away from Usagi as the bed would allow.
Laying down, he mirrored her position, facing her with one hand up under the pillow as he cautiously place his head down, still trying to keep as much space between them as he could.
She looked at him quizzically. "What are you doing? Why are you so far away?"
Her hand came up to brush hair from his eyes, and the gesture was so sweet, he had to bite his lip from the rush of tears that threatened to spill over.
God, he was exhausted, and the last of his nerves were wearing thin. Being in a bed, his bed, with Usagi of all people certainly wasn't helping him hang on to the last bits of his sanity.
Usagi's hand was still moving gently across his forehead. "It's ok, Mamo-chan. You can come closer."
But he shook his head, a deep pool of sadness settling in his chest. "I can't, Usako. I just can't."
"Why?" she asked, her brows knit.
"Because you don't really want this. You'll wake up tomorrow, and regret everything, and I can't do that to you," he said, closing his eyes against the hurt reflected in hers.
He couldn't do it to himself either. Her regret would surely be the end of him.
"But I do want this," she said, and he opened his eyes and mouth to protest.
"You don't. I promise you. You hate me. You always have."
To Mamoru's surprise, she smiled then, and scooted closer to him, so close that he could feel her breath on his face.
"Oh, Mamo-chan. Who could ever hate you?" she said, and his heart nearly shattered.
He let out a soft, humorless laugh. "Someone whom I was terrible to. Calling her Odango Atama and making fun of her grades and unladylike attitude."
Usagi just smiled brighter. "You know, I secretly always loved it when you called me Odango Atama."
Mamoru laughed louder this time, it came out as a bark of disbelief. "Geez, Usako. Now I know you're delirious."
"I mean it!" she refuted, sitting up slightly so that she was leaning over him. "It made me feel special. You never had a nickname for anyone else…"
He did smile a little then. "No, I definitely didn't. You're the only one."
She blushed so prettily at that, and he fought down the overwhelming urge to kiss her. It would have been so easy to reach up and place his hand behind her head, guiding her down to him and giving in to one of the greatest desires he'd ever known.
He wasn't the only one who had the idea it seemed, as he noticed her head lean slowly towards his, her eyes moving slowly from his down to his lips.
She was so close. It would be so easy. He wanted this more than anything he'd ever wanted.
But it was the look of utter and complete trust in her eyes as they fluttered shut that stopped him.
He sat up, breathing harshly, and his sudden movement caused Usagi to lose her balance and fall down to the bed.
His vision was soon filled with her when she recovered, scrambling around to sit right in front of him.
Her face carried an expression of hurt that he seemed rather adept at placing there. "Mamo-chan, why won't you kiss me? You said you loved me, I-"
"You're drugged, Usa."
"But Mamo-chan, I want this! You love me-"
Something broke in him. It was too much. This was all just too much.
"I do love you!" he cried at her too loudly, but to Usagi's credit she didn't flinch or move away. "I've loved you since the day I met you, Usako, but it scared me so badly I lashed out and ruined everything, and now you're here, in my apartment, in my bed, asking me to do things I've dreamed of for so long, but I can't."
He thread his hands through his hair, pulling so hard, he was sure some strands had come loose, and looking down at the bed and away from her, unable to meet her eyes any longer.
Usagi's small hands grabbed at his wrists, trying to get him to look at her. "But you can! I love you, too! I'm asking you-"
His head whipped up, and he knew he must have been a strange sight to see with mussed hair and wild eyes. "But I can't, don't you see?! This isn't you, Usako! It's that stupid potion you drank. Why did you drink it?!"
She was crying now, and he immediately regretted his words and raised voice. Why did it seem like every time he opened his mouth he upset her?
"What was I supposed to do, let you die?" she asked on a hiccup, and his heart twisted painfully.
He let out a defeated sigh. "Usako, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you cry, I-"
His sentence wasn't finished before she launched herself at him with such a force he was knocked down onto the pillows behind them.
She was sobbing harder now, and he did his best to comfort her, stroking her back and whispering soft sounds in her ears, all while wishing he could regret her being here in his arms.
"I couldn't let you die," she cried into his neck.
Mamoru wasn't sure how he could possibly respond to such a declaration, and all that came out was a lame, "I know."
He rocked her back and forth until her cries calmed to sniffles, and he mustered the courage to speak again.
"We should get some sleep, Usa. This'll all be over in the morning."
"What if I don't want it to be over?" she asked, looking up at him with tear stained cheeks.
Smiling softly at her, he allowed himself a soft and chaste kiss to her forehead. "We'll talk more in the morning."
He felt her head nod against his chest in agreement, and he rolled them onto their sides, keeping her pressed against his form, only letting go to settle them under the blankets, both of them this time.
When he reached over her to turn off the lamp, he heard a quiet, "Mamo-chan, will you hold me?"
His response came immediately. "Of course."
oOo
She couldn't help the smile that raised her lips when her eyes opened to find two ocean blue eyes staring back at her.
Mamoru. This crazy irritating, ridiculously beautiful and kind man she'd been in love with since she was sixteen was in the same bed as her.
His hair was adorably ruffled, and eyes still slightly clouded with sleep, and Usagi felt that familiar surge of butterflies she still got every time she looked at him, only magnified tenfold by his proximity.
"How do you feel?" he asked slowly, his voice even deeper than normal from sleep and lack of use.
She paused to think if there could possibly be a word for what she felt in that moment? Elated. Content. Happy. Loved.
She eventually settled on the much more reasonable. "Normal."
Mamoru nodded, and didn't say anything else, his face serious and unreadable.
They lay in silence, neither making a move to change their positions or speak, and Usagi was content to take in his presence as long as he would let her.
But their quiet, peaceful space was soon interrupted by the shrill ring of Mamoru's phone.
He moved quickly out of the bed with a sigh, and Usagi took the opportunity to roll into the space he'd just vacated, inhaling his scent on the pillow like the creep she was.
His absence allowed her mind to wander over what had happened the day before, and she was surprised she could remember everything so clearly considering the obvious effects the potion had had on her.
It had turned her into a love struck fool completely incapable of being separated from the man she'd been head over heels for for nearly two years.
And he'd confessed his feelings to her too! Told her he'd loved her from day one, had held her the whole night and all she'd had to do was ask.
But did he mean it? her stupid brain chimed in, voice unfortunately louder than the screaming happiness of her heart.
Usagi knew Mamoru was an unfailingly kind man. Even to her the past year or so he'd been sweet and had helped her pass more than one English test.
So, probably...probably he'd only said those things to placate her? She had been completely ridiculous after all. And what was a poor guy to do when they had a love-struck eighteen year old who refused to be separated from them?
Or even worse, what if it had all been just to mess with her? Get her to admit her feelings so he'd finally have something else to tease her about?
Mamoru wouldn't do that she repeated over and over again in her head, but the doubt wouldn't go away.
She hated it so much, finally having everything she ever wanted, but their past interactions refused to be pushed down and let her have this.
At least he believed she'd only said those things under the influence of some crazy drug. She could always blame her confessions on that if he insisted on throwing them in her face.
She was trying to decide between staying put and transforming and flying out the window when she heard his throat clear.
Usagi sat up, her head whipped towards the door, to see him leaning against the frame, naturally looking like nothing in the world could possibly bother him.
They stared at each other for a few long moments, before she decided the silence was just too much. She'd never done well with silence.
"Mamoru, I-"
"Why did you drink that potion, Usagi?"
They spoke at the same time, but his voice overpowered hers for once, whatever she was going to say dying in her throat at the way his eyes bored into hers.
"W-what do you mean?" she sputtered out.
"Why did you drink that potion?" he asked again, voice unwavering.
She looked around hoping some brilliant means of escape might come to her, but when none did, she faced him again, mouth open and eyes confused.
"Because I couldn't let you die, I told you that, I-"
"Why, Usagi?" he asked, more forcefully than he previously had. He was so annoying when he wanted to be.
"Because I love you, you idiot!" she yelled without thinking, and immediately clapped her hand over her mouth when she realized the giant mistake she'd just made.
She watched in horror as a bright, brilliant smile spread over his features, wondering if she could convince Zoicite to do her a solid and just end it all right then and there.
"That was Ami," he said, the smile still firmly planted on his face. "She ran extensive tests on whatever it was you drank, and found some interesting things?"
Usagi was having to remind herself to breathe. "Am I going to die?" she rushed out.
Mamoru had the gall to laugh, and shrugged his shoulders, all while that infuriating smile was still being sent her way. "Not for a long while, hopefully."
She blushed, still incredibly confused. "What did she say, then?"
He took his time in answering, walking towards the bed to sit down on the edge of to face her, his thigh inadvertently brushing against hers.
"Well, as it turns out, that wasn't a love potion you drank," he said.
"It...wasn't?"
Mamoru shook his head. "No, it wasn't. It was a mood enhancer."
She sucked in a breath. "A what?"
He reached out and took her hand, gently threading his fingers through hers, and she could have sworn her heart was going to just jump out of her body into a puddle at his feet.
"A mood enhancer. A truth serum of sorts, if you will."
Her excitement deflated. He knew every word she said was true. Every. Stupid. Word.
"Mamoru, listen, please-"
"I'm kind of glad actually," he interrupted her, a lopsided grin on his lips.
Her breath caught. "Y-you are?"
He nodded, and looked down at their still joined hands. "It's a relief to know this ridiculous, clingy, loud, exhausting woman loves me back," he said, and she nearly died again. "Even if she is an Odango Atama."
He always had to ruin things with that big mouth of his. And god, she loved him.
"Oh, Mamo-chan," she said, squeezing his hand, the same bright smile finally echoed on her own mouth. "You giant jerk."
She threw herself into his arms, knocking them both to the floor of his room, as he twisted their bodies expertly to absorb the impact.
She giggled at his rumpled appearance, and he was soon laughing along with her.
"You're going to be the death of me, woman, you know that right?" he asked, all smiles and perfect teeth and hair and face and mouth.
She nodded, leaning forward so their noses touched, "I'll make sure you die happy."
And she kissed him then, long and hard and deep, because he loved her and she loved him and they both wanted this. But mostly just because she finally could, of course.
oOo
"Was all of that really necessary, Puu?" Princess Usagi Small Lady Serenity asked her friend, resisting the urge to roll her eyes at the ridiculous display that was the past selves of her parents.
"Quite," Pluto replied. "The Silence is looming, and they wouldn't have been able to beat it without each other."
The princess sighed, and shrugged her shoulders. "Are they always like this?" she asked, pointing to the images before them of her parents passionately kissing on her father's apartment floor.
"Unfortunately, yes," the Senshi of Time said. "There is no middle ground with your parents. They either fall into bed immediately, or yell at each other it seems."
"Sounds about right."
Pluto looked at the princess from the corner of her eye. "And besides, this isn't even close to the worst I've done to them."
Small Lady giggled, and turned to walk back towards the palace. "I'm getting out of here before I have the misfortune of seeing my own existence come to pass."
Pluto rolled her eyes and smiled.