Hello, lovely readers! Strap in and get ready because this is going to be a wild ride!

Welcome to chapter 1 of my ideal season 4 for Miraculous Ladybug. While we will see hints of other ships in this, it is primarily a love-square fic. I am writing this to heal my heart after the season 3 finale.

I hope you enjoy!

Comments and kudos are always appreciated. They fuel my need to keep writing about these wonderful, lovesick dorks.

I cross-post on AO3 and on Tumblr.

Tumblr: gryffindorcls (I will be posting my fics to the "Princess In Training" blog. Also, come talk to me over there! I would love to discuss my stories and the Miraculous fandom with y'all!)

AO3: clslovegood47

I own nothing but the plot.

Marinette sat on her bed and stared at the pile of pictures she'd just ripped off her wall. As she carefully removed the images, she placed each one upside down. As much as she still loved Adrien, she didn't want to look at his face...besides, it was already burned into her mind. The pain was still fresh, and she was doing her best to not make it hurt any more than it already did.

She sniffled and Tikki landed on her shoulder.

"Are you okay?" the tiny red being asked with sympathetic eyes.

"No," she sighed, hanging her head.

"It's okay. You don't have to be. A lot of things happened really fast."

The teen choked back a sob. "No, Tikki. Everything changed. EVERYTHING! I keep going between moments where things feel okay and then they're suddenly not again. I love being Ladybug, but it's still a lot. We lost Master Fu...I...I don't know if I'm ready to be the Guardian. I still have to go to school. I still have to help in the bakery. I still have to fight Akumas. I still...I can't just be a normal kid, can I?"

Tikki hugged her holder's cheek. "Oh, Marinette...I hate to tell you this, but you were never destined to be 'normal'. You were chosen for this, and you are one of the strongest wielders I've ever had. You are incredible, and now you're the Guardian."

"It's too much. It's all too much. I need time, but I feel like I don't have any...and now I'm all alone. I have no one to go to for guidance."

"I will always be here for you, Marinette, and you can always talk to Chat Noir."

"But Chat isn't the Guardian, and I can't really talk to him about all of this without giving away too much about my identity."

"I've been meaning to talk to you about that."

Marinette cocked her head to the side. "What do you mean?"

Tikki paused before continuing. "The whole secret identities thing. You weren't wrong when you said that everything changed. It was never a rule for the Ladybug and Black Cat Miraculous wielders to stay hidden from each other forever. That was the doing of a man who was afraid of his past coming back to haunt him. You and Chat are meant to be equal partners, and as the Guardian, it would be beneficial for you to know who he is if there was ever an emergency. This Miracle Box is in your care now. You get to set the rules."

Something seized inside of Marinette. "Trust me when I say that I've thought about it, but I don't think I can do that right now. I need something to stay the same for a while."

"I understand. It probably doesn't help that...well...you know." Tikki gestured towards the pictures on Marinette's bed.

"I really don't want to talk about that right now."

"I just want you to be happy."

"I think I will be, but I need to figure things out first.

"It will all make sense soon."

Before Marinette could respond, her phone chimed. She looked down at the name attached to the message and smiled.

Luka: You still seemed a little stressed earlier today when we got ice cream. Are you feeling any better?

Marinette: I'm fine. Thank you for asking.

Luka: I'm always here if you need to talk.

Marinette: I know...thank you again. Goodnight!

Luka: Goodnight, Marinette. May you fall asleep to the sweetest melodies in your head.

Marinette sighed and slipped her phone into her pocket. She picked up the photos and walked down the ladder. When her feet landed on the floor, she padded over to her desk, opened a drawer, and buried the pictures beneath several used sketchbooks.

"Are you really sure that you want to do this?" Tikki asked with a worried glance.

Tears began to reform in the corners of Marinette's eyes. "Yes, Tikki. I need to try and move on. Adrien is with Kagami now, and I don't want to lose either of them as friends."

"But you still love him."

"I know, and I think I always will...but I just want him to be happy. And he was so happy with Kagami. I can't take that away from him."

"Are they actually dating each other? I don't recall hearing anyone say that they were officially a couple."

Tears began to flow freely down Marinette's cheeks. "It doesn't matter! If they're not dating yet, they will be soon. Did you see how he looked at her? I can't get in the way of that...I can't…"

Marinette sunk to the floor and held herself. While sobs racked her body, Tikki nuzzled the top of her holder's head and hummed.

"I don't want you to get Akumatized," Tikki whispered in her ear.

"I hate this! I hate all of this! I can't even feel sad when I'm upset. I hate Hawkmoth, I hate the Akumas, I hate not being able to be myself! I have to lie to everyone! I'm all alone. I can't tell anyone about this...I even have Luka telling me that I can talk to him at any time, and I can't even do that!"

"You should really consider talking to Chat Noir."

"I TOLD YOU I CAN'T!"

"Yes, you can! He's your partner. You don't have to tell him everything...just talk to him about your fears and your feelings. He's a good person, and he cares about you. If you ask to talk, he will listen."

"I don't think I can."

"I think you'll find that you can talk to him. You have patrol later...speak with Chat Noir then. You two must be there for each other from now on. You need to be each other's support systems. It was different when Master Fu was here, but he's no anymore."

Marinette's voice dropped to a whisper. "I know."

Tikki offered her holder a small smile. "What can I do to help you feel better until you have to go on patrol?"

"I...ummm...actually...I-I need some time to think," she said, tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear, "I'm...uh...sorry for yelling. Thank you for talking with me. I will...umm...take your suggestion into consideration. I'll be up on my balcony if you need me."

The tiny red being nodded and zipped away to her cozy nest of soft fabric scraps and polyfill while her holder climbed out the hatch leading to the balcony. Once there, Marinette wrapped herself in a blanket and sad huddled on a lawn chair. Silent tears continued to streak her face while she stared off into the distance.

A soft breeze gently caressed her face while Marinette took a deep breath and embraced the stillness of the evening. She did her best to put herself into a bubble-to shut out the world around her and focus exclusively on her thoughts and feelings. The world may count on Ladybug to save the day, but Marinette was desperate to find her own safety and security. She'd been thrown into a world of uncertainty, and she was terrified.

With the failing light of day came a sense of closure. The sun was setting on one chapter of her life, and the break of dawn would force her to turn to the next page of her story.

A throbbing fear pulsed through her veins like a dull ache as she gripped the blanket closer to her body. She was responsible for so much now...and she didn't know if she was ready for all that was to come. The departure of Master Fu ushered in a new reality where Marinette would be looked to for guidance and instruction.

She squeezed her eyes shut and allowed herself to feel. It was a luxury that she was not often given due to the nature of Hawkmoth's Akumas. In her attempt to control the trepidation that had settled in her gut, she was struck with a sense of familiarity.

A breathy laugh sounded through her next sob as she recalled the day she'd received her Miraculous and thought she was a failure after forgetting to cleanse Stoneheart's Akuma. The emotions swirling inside her now mirrored the doubt that she felt when her adventure as Ladybug began.

A pair of bright green eyes filled with compassion and understanding flooded her mind as she recalled how she overcame her first hurdle as one of Paris' beloved superheroes. Her partner's encouraging words on that day resonated throughout her being and began to fill her with hope for the future.

Marinette let her mind wander. "Maybe Tikki is right...Chat has always been there for me. He was there for me in the beginning, and he was there for me today...every time...I can always count on him...I can…"

"Princess?" a voice questioned, breaking her out of her reverie.

"Chat Noir," she whispered while seeking solace in his gaze.

"Are you okay?"

Marinette turned her face away from Chat and hastily wiped away her tears with the back of her hand.

"I'm fine," she croaked.

He took a step closer to her. "No, you're not."

"What are you doing here? Doesn't Chat Noir have something better to do than sit here and talk to someone like me?"

"Well, I have patrol with Ladybug soon, and your house is on the way to our meeting place. That...and it's my job to make sure that the people of Paris are safe from Akumas...and I think that includes working to prevent citizens from getting Akumatized, as well."

"I guess...yeah."

Chat knelt down next to her and placed a comforting hand on her arm. "I'm not leaving until I know that you're going to be okay. No one cries like that and is happy. I may not be the best at reading people, but you're making it pretty obvious how you're feeling right now."

"But you don't even know me," she replied with a trembling lip.

"Oh, contraire, Princess. I think I do. I saw your bravery the day you helped me with the Evillustrator. You extended the hand of friendship to me after your dad was Akumatized. You even tried to cheer me up when I was heartbroken."

"Okay...I suppose we're not complete strangers."

"No, we're not, and I for one wouldn't mind getting to know you better. I can always use a friend...well, I have friends, but I don't really feel like I can tell them everything. Does that make sense?"

Marinette scoffed. "More than you know."

Chat backed away and leaned against the railing. "So...would you like to tell me what's wrong? I have two ears that are willing to listen if it'll make you feel better."

Thoughts raced through Marinette's mind as she basked in the sincerity behind Chat Noir's expression. "He can't know yet...I'm not ready...I just need more time. Don't give anything away, but you need to say something. Just...just tell him…"

"There's so much...I-I don't really know where to start," she said with a shrug.

He nodded. "Okay, I get that. Trust me. I've been there, and it's okay to feel overwhelmed. Maybe...try to pick one thing. What was it that broke the camel's back? What upset you to the point that you felt like you had to come outside?"

"The thought of talking to you...wait, you can't tell Chat that. Try something else...I don't want to lie...SAY SOMETHING, MARINETTE."

"A boy," she finally mumbled.

"Oh." Chat turned his head away. "Is it the same boy as last time?"

Memories of Adrien flooded her mind and a new wave of pain filled her gut. She'd been so careful all day. She'd removed his pictures from her wall in an attempt to erase the need to dwell on what she'd seen. Until this moment, she'd been trying to ignore the ache that came with the sudden loss of Adrien as an available love interest. She'd been using the sadness from saying goodbye to Master Fu to keep her heart from completely shattering, but now that she'd started talking about her crush, her heart was falling to pieces.

"Yes." Her lip trembled as she tried to hold back tears.

Without warning, the floodgates opened once again, and Marinette was reduced to a puddle of heartache. She curled up on the lawn chair and smashed her face into the blanket. Each sob felt like a knife in her chest, and soon it became hard to breathe.

Just as she began gasping for air, two strong arms wrapped around her and held her tight. The warmth coming from Chat's body and the steady beating of his heart alleviated the pressure on her chest. As her breathing returned to normal, she melted into his embrace.

"It's just like the hug from before...when I was sad during the Akuma battle."

"You give magic hugs," she mumbled into his suit.

He chuckled. "I'm glad I could do something. Princess, I don't ever want to see you cry like that again."

"I can't promise that I won't...Chat...I...he…" Marinette could feel a fresh batch of tears brimming along her eyelid.

Chat squeezed her tighter against his chest. "Shhhh...no, it's okay. It'll all be okay. Please don't cry again. You don't have to talk about him if you don't want to."

"It's all so new...he loves someone else, and I let him go. The worst part is...I still have to see him all the time. He doesn't even know that I am...was...am? I don't know...AM...I don't think it'll ever go away. He doesn't know how I feel. I love him with everything inside of me, and I have to figure out how to move on. I just want him to be happy."

"Wow." Chat released Marinette and shook his head. "I guess we're both trying that whole 'moving on' thing, huh?"

Marinette wiped her face with the back of her hand and furrowed her brow. "What are you talking about?"

"No, Princess. I don't want to talk about my own love problems. This is about you, not me."

"Chat...I think I could use a distraction from my own problems."

"Are you sure?"

"I'm positive."

He took a deep breath and ran his fingers through his hair. "Umm...Ladybug has made it abundantly clear that she doesn't want to be with me...romantically. Another girl tried to kiss me today, and I kind of freaked out...but I don't know...maybe I'll try dating her?"

Marinette suddenly felt funny hearing Chat talk about another girl, but she quickly pushed the sensation away. "Is there a reason why you freaked out?"

"I don't think I'm ready yet."

"You seemed to be ready to have a relationship with Ladybug."

"That's different...Ladybug is...different. When I'm with her, I feel complete. A life without her is like a life without oxygen, but this other girl told me that she loved me...and it's kind of nice to feel loved. I don't get a lot of that...and she's nice, and I'm trying. However, I can't help but feel like something is missing when I'm with her. It's as if I can't be myself."

"Can I be honest?"

"I would love it if you were honest."

Marinette smiled. "Chat, you deserve to be with someone who loves you for all that you are. You might be goofy and reckless sometimes, but there is never a moment that you are not brave, kind, or loyal."

He smirked. "And how would you know that I'm brave, kind, and loyal?"

"Because I've seen you in action. Not just on the Ladyblog, but in person...remember?"

"Yeah...I guess so. Thanks. I just don't know what to do right now. I want to be happy, but I just don't know if this is the way to make it happen."

"Ummm...maybe try a date or two with this girl? See how it goes? Maybe it'll help you move on."

"There's a part of me...well, a large part of me...that doesn't want to move on. Is it really fair to this other girl to be with her when I'm hopelessly in love with Ladybug?"

"Maybe it's not hopeless," Marinette mumbled.

"Woah...where did that come from? Don't give him false hope." She quickly brushed the thought away.

He scrunched his face. "Huh?"

"Uh...what I meant was...try things out with the other girl, and umm...try to find happiness?"

"But what if things don't work out?" He hung his head.

Seeing the pained expression on her partner's face tugged hard at her heartstrings. Marinette hated seeing Chat with a frown on his face because he seemed like the kind of person who should be happy all the time. She knew that he deserved happiness.

The more that she got to know Chat, the more she started to understand what his civilian life might be like. There were more than enough occasions that he'd said something concerning, but today she saw just how lonely he must be.

If anything, he kind of reminded her of Adrien...a person who chose to be kind despite terrible circumstances. If she couldn't make Adrien happy, then maybe she could focus her energy on helping Chat Noir.

Marinette got up, walked over to Chat, and placed a gentle hand on his arm. "Well, if it doesn't work out, you're always welcome to come here and eat cookies with me."

He perked up. "Wait...do you really mean that?"

"I do. I could always use another friend, too. Why not get to know one of the heroes of Paris a little bit better?"

"Has anyone ever told you that you're amazing, Marinette?"

"Adrien did."

She sighed. "Yes, but it's still nice hearing it from you."

They stood in silence until Chat jumped, grabbed his baton, and looked at the screen. "Oh, no...I'm...uh...I have to go. A lot happened today, and I have patrol soon. I can't be late. I...umm...are you okay?"

Marinette wrapped her arms around him and gave him the warmest embrace she could muster. "Yes, I'm going to be just fine...thanks to you."

"Are you sure?"

"I'm positive."

"So...is the invitation to come back and talk only there if my love life crashes and burns or…"

"Chat Noir, you are welcome to come here whenever you want so long as it is a decent hour."

He smiled. "Alright...I'll keep that in mind. Thank you, Princess. Have a wonderful night. I'll see you around."

"I'll see you soon." She waved as he bounded off across the rooftops.

Within seconds of his departure, Marinette climbed back into her bedroom and called for her Kwami.

"Well, that sure was a surprise!" the tiny red being said enthusiastically.

"Yeah...maybe this will be a good thing. He can get to know me before I reveal myself to him."

"So you've decided to tell him! I'm so proud of you, Marinette!"

"Not just yet...I still need…time. But now that I've talked to Chat Noir, I think I'm ready to go talk to him again...as Ladybug. I think it's time to start being honest with my partner. It's the only way we're going to get through all of this."

"I'm so happy to hear you say that! I'm ready to go whenever you are."

For the first time all day, Marinette felt a wave of confidence surge through her body. "TIKKI, SPOTS ON!"