Please note that I have nothing against the characters, pairings, or kinks stated in this chapter. If that's your thing, you do your thing!

Except Erica. She's mine and I hate her, so feel free to hate her too.

Chapter 10

[ADRIEN]

Adrien was not pouting, thank you very much.

After all, how could he be? Here he was, with the girl of his dreams and the boy who'd made him question his sexuality, eating thick, hot soup after a day filled with fantastic sex. He was certainly not panicking internally on all the many ways he could've screwed this up already, or mentally listing all the things he could buy to make them let him stay for just one more day, or—

"How long are we gonna play the silent game?" Marinette asked. Adrien's eyes flew to her face to see her smirking at him as she tore her bread in two.

"I—uh… was too busy eating!" he said quickly, digging into his soup for another bite. "It's really good!"

The look she and Luka gave him told him he still wasn't fooling anyone.

"I… um… what do you wanna talk about?" he asked timidly.

"Hmm…." Marinette tapped her lips with her spoon as she pondered. Her eyes lit up. "Celebrity fantasy hook-ups! Who would you want if you could have anyone?"

Are you kidding? I'm kinda living it right now, Adrien thought silently. Out loud he answered, "You guys know I'm a celebrity, right? And that I've actually had celebrity hook-ups?"

"Yeah, but not fantasy celebrity hook-ups," Marinette teased.

"This isn't fair," Luka complained. "You already know mine!"

"Huh?" Adrien raised an eyebrow at him questioningly. Luka grinned and pointed at him, then Marinette, and then raised his fingers to his eyes in a blatant imitation of a mask.

"Oh," Adrien said, ducking his head so they couldn't see him blush. He had a feeling he'd be donning some sort of Chat Noir costume in the very near future, and honestly, he wasn't against it. It would certainly be nice to Mari in her spots again….

"Oh, come on," Marinette pouted. "You're telling me neither of you have even entertained thoughts of a Jagged Stone/Clara Nightingale threesome?!"

Both boys thought about it and shook their heads.

"Clara's too perky," Adrien said, "don't get me wrong, her flexibility is… amazing. But no, she'd probably try to sing to me while—yeah." He shook his head again.

Luka snickered. "Note to self, don't try to sing to Adrien while fucking him," he said, pretending to write on his hand. Adrien made a face and chucked a piece of bread at him, pleased when his lover caught it in his mouth.

"As for me," Luka said, swallowing, "Jagged Stone is no-go territory, babe."

"You were happy enough to meet him," Marinette said, scowling.

"True. True," Luka nodded. "He's been my idol for as long as I can remember. But…," he winced a bit. "When I was little, my mom… hinted heavily that he was my dad."

"WHAT?!" Marinette and Adrien both stood up, shocked. Luka held up his hands.

"She wouldn't confirm anything. And she left that part of my damn birth certificate blank, so there's no way to know unless I ask him for a paternity test—which I am NOT gonna do," he added quickly, shaking a finger in Marinette's direction. She puffed her cheeks at him angrily.

"But—"

"Babe, I am all grown up," he said, grabbing her hand and rubbing it soothingly. "If I ask him now, the press will catch it, and they'll make it look like the band is trying to land some sort of favoritism angle. I'm not doing that to them. Especially not now."

"But, Luka—" Marinette tried again.

"Besides, the test could always come up negative," he pointed out. "Just let me dream."

She still looked upset.

"Ugh, now I'm not gonna be able to fantasize about him either," she pouted, sinking back into her chair.

"Are we doing something wrong, to make you want to fantasize about other guys?!" Adrien exclaimed, also sitting.

"He's too old for you anyway," Luka added, winking. "Unless you've got a daddy kink you haven't told me about."

"Ewww, gross!"

"NOPE!" Adrien said, loudly enough to make them both pause. He held up his hands in surrender. "Sorry, guys, but that's a hard no from me. If you guys are gonna be doing any 'daddy' roleplays, I can't be a part of it. Just—no." He shuddered.

Marinette wrinkled her nose. "Ugh, I can see why," she said. Adrien's hopes rose a little. If anyone could understand just how deep this 'squick' went, it would be her.

"Don't worry, Adrien," Luka said, nodding at him. "It's a hard no from me too."

"No daddy kinks all around," Marinette agreed, raising her glass high. They sealed the agreement with a toast, clinking their glasses together.

"So, Adrien," Luka said, looking thoughtful. Adrien's pulse spiked. "If you wanna—"

"What's that sound?" Marinette interrupted, looking around.

Adrien and Luka also fell silent, listening. Adrien felt himself flush when he realized his phone was buzzing. He dug it out of the pants Marinette had forced him and Luka to put on after they'd tried to jump her while she was cutting vegetables. (He was personally glad Ladybug's Lucky Charms had all been innocuous objects. Mari with a weapon was scary!)

The caller ID had him groaning, though.

Erica.

How dare she call him after ghosting him last night and leaving with another man?

"Your girlfriend?" Luka guessed.

"Ex," Adrien corrected, growling. "I don't deal with cheaters and she knew it. We were over the moment she left the club without me." He moved to put the phone back in his pocket.

"Answer it," Marinette said, exchanging a wicked smirk with Luka. "Put it on speaker." Adrien blinked at her, then obeyed, feeling a little thrill go through him when they both abandoned their seats to come stand behind him.

"Adrien?!" Erica's shrill voice filled the air. "Oh my God, why haven't you been answering your phone?!"

"Because I didn't notice you called," he said. It was a lie, he'd seen it when he'd checked his messages earlier, he just hadn't cared enough to call her back. He gasped. Marinette had just run her fingers through his hair, with extra emphasis on the nails against his scalp.

Oh sweet Jesu! If it had been a hard no from him with those other kinks, THIS was an exultant YES!

"Sorry, sweetie!" Marinette called, to his delight. "We've kinda been keeping him busy!" She scratched him again, and Adrien couldn't hold back his moan.

"Who the hell—"

"Very busy," Luka added on his other side, deepening his voice a bit and giving Adrien's earlobe a quick nip. Both those actions sent a jolt right down the pit of his stomach. "We'd like to thank you for letting go of someone with such stamina! We've had quite the day!"

On the other end, Erica had gone conspicuously silent. Adrien pulled the phone closer to himself.

"So, uh, yeah," he said softly, "as I'm sure you already know, we're through."

"How dare you!" she shrieked. "After everything I've done for you!" Marinette snorted in derision and started massaging his shoulders.

"What?" Adrien laughed, leaning back in his chair to relax against her ministrations. Oh, this was priceless. "What exactly have you 'done for me?'"

"I—I—"

"Besides leaving me on my own so you can fuck another dude?"

"That's—We're just cousins!"

"Oh, kissing cousins?" Adrien laughed again. It would've actually been funny if he hadn't heard that same excuse a thousand times over from his other casual encounters. "You had your tongue pretty far down his throat before you left, babe. Try another one." Luka chuckled in approval and swirled his tongue around Adrien's ear.

"Like this?" He whispered. Adrien wanted to whimper.

"Fine," Erica seethed on the other end. "Fine! Be that way! Do your new partners realize how codependent you are?! How much you cling to whoever you're fucking?!"

Luka and Marinette's attentions stopped and Adrien felt his breath leave him. Oh God. Oh no. Please don't let them…. He looked up at Marinette and Luka. They both still looked amused.

"That's okay," Marinette called towards the phone. "I like to cuddle!" To emphasize this, she wrapped her arms around Adrien's shoulders. Relief and warmth flooded him. If he hadn't already been sitting, he would've fallen over.

"And there's two of us, so we should be able to handle it," Luka added, kissing the top of Adrien's head. He wanted to cry. It felt so good. He was safe, and happy, and loved—

"Oh, you are just sick!" his ex spat. "Boys and girls? It's—it's unnatural!"

Adrien stared at his phone in disbelief. She'd known he was bisexual from the start! She'd never seemed to have a problem with it before!

"Somebody sounds jealous," Marinette drawled.

"You're a freak!"

"And you're," Luka leaned over to tap on Adrien's phone, "cancelled." He hung up on her and grinned at Adrien. "And that, my friend, is how you take out the trash."

"Thanks, you guys," Adrien said, letting out a shaky breath. "Usually my break-ups require a few more shouting matches and bottles of wine."

And more of me sobbing into my pillow, he added silently.

"Aww," Marinette cooed, holding him tighter, "poor Adrikins."

Adrien gave a weak laugh. "Please don't ever call me that again."

"Only for Chloé, huh?" she pouted, pulling away.

He shot her a wry grin. "It just sounds weird when you say it." To his surprise, her face softened.

"All right then, kitty," she said softly. Adrien felt his heart leap, especially when she let him go and stroked his hair again. Yes! Yes, that one will do quite nicely, thank you! "Let's get supper cleaned up and then we can go cuddle, okay?"

"Okay," he whispered, leaning into her touch desperately.

"Why don't you two go ahead," Luka suggested. "I'll clean up." He started clearing the table.

"You sure?" Marinette asked, giving him a quick peck as he passed by.

"Yeah. You can," he gave Adrien a suggestive smirk, "get him ready." Adrien gulped, wondering just what they might have planned for him—

"No sex tonight," Marinette suddenly declared.

"What?! Aww…" He and Luka made disappointed sounds.

"Nope," she said firmly. "If we're going to try for a real relationship here, we have to have more than just the physical. And since you two have already jumped the gun today—"

"I already apologized for that!" Luka protested.

"—then we need to have a session where everyone feels loved and accepted," she finished, glaring at her blue-haired boyfriend. "So," she turned on Adrien, "tonight we are going to cuddle your 'codependent' ass until you get some much-needed sleep."

Adrien opened his mouth to retort, but then he closed it again. Who could argue with something like that?

A/N: And now, we're all caught up with what I had on Tumblr, so the updating schedule is going to be much more sporadic from here on out. I haven't abandoned it, I promise! I just have a lot to catch up with.

And yes, I did write this chapter before Desperada came out, so yes, I was laughing VERY hard when we found out about Anarka's past.