Author's Note: Additional tags include: Whump, Hurt No Comfort, War. Proceed with caution.

Roy trudges through the barren streets of Sunecu, the last city at the border between Amestris and Creta in the West Area. His arms aching from the lifeless body he carries, Roy finally spots his destination - roughly a mile away- but his legs tremble with every step and he can't breathe. His head throbs and he feels dizzy, but he resolutely ignores the uncomfortable sensations.

The Colonel pauses, closing his eyes and gasping for air. The sun beats down on his back. Even rid of his wool uniform jacket, which he had draped over the body in his arms, the heat sears through his clothes and drenches him in sweat.

Growling, he pushes on, walking stiffly and ignoring his burden. Sweat drips down his neck and face and his vision wavers. His stomach feels queasy, the muscles in his legs and arms cramped.

"I fucking hate border wars," he grouses aloud, voice cracking from dehydration. He approaches his destination - the hospital - seeing it only ten feet ahead but too exhausted to speed up. A few nurses, probably on their smoking break, come out of the doors and see him just as his legs gave out and he falls to his knees, eyelids sliding shut as he blacks out.

"-stang? Sir, are you alright?"

Roy groans, opening his eyes to find that he is still on his knees in the street. Dimly, he glances down at the weight on his legs and flinches, frozen in horror.

"Oh god," he rasps. "F-fuck, I'd forgotten..." he is interrupted by a dry coughing spell and watches as nurses began to heft the body onto a stretcher.

"Fullmetal," he whispers.

The nurse says something to him but he can't hear over the static in his ears. He feels numb, slow.

"I think I'm in shock," he mumbles as a nurse helps him onto another stretcher. They touch him, asking questions, but all he can see is- Ed's face, streaked with blood and dirt as his dull eyes locked with Roy's.

"Colonel...it's not your fault," he rasped. His body convulsed and he coughed harshly, blood spewing from his lips and splattering across his clothes.

"No! Fullmetal!" The teen's eyes slid shut and blood trickled from his lips, but Roy was powerless to do anything with medics over three hours away on foot.

"EDWARD!"

Roy startles awake again, lying on his back in a hospital cot. He sits up quickly, immediately regretting the action as his head spins and stomach flips.

Strong, cool hands push him back down against the scratchy pillow.

"Not so fast, Colonel. You've got pretty bad heatstroke, you need to rest."

"Where's Fullmetal?" Roy manages to whisper, wincing at the dryness of his throat. A small paper cup is thrust in his hands and he looks down at it, seeing the ice cubes it contains and taking one out. He sucks on it for a moment, feeling the cool water trickle down his throat as it melts. The doctor standing beside him sits down with a sigh.

"Major Elric has passed away," he says slowly. "He was already dead when you got here."

Roy's breath catches in his throat and his head swims.

"He...died? While I was walking?"

The doctor nods, grimly. "Roughly an hour and a half before you made it here. I'm sorry. He was a great kid."

Roy swallows, something inside of him shattering and piercing his heart with shards of white-hot agony. "No," he chokes, throat closing up painfully. "No..." The doctor frowns in sympathy as Roy turns away, jaw working as a single tear streaks down his face.

The doctor stands, squeezing his shoulder gently before leaving him to mourn alone. Roy is unable to shed any tears, his body depleted of any water to spare, so he turns on his side and wraps his arms around himself, crunching ice cubes between his teeth miserably.

A week passes before Roy is discharged from the hospital and sent back to Central to attend Edward's funeral.

He is given a month of stress leave for the death of a subordinate, but he wishes he didn't have all that time. Roy doesn't want time to reflect on what happened, he wants to shove it aside and keep pushing forward, to deal with his sticky messy emotions later.

The funeral passes in a blur, just as Hughes's had, except practically everyone in Amestris is there and Alphonse and Winry are crying silently in the front.

Roy feels Riza's hand press against his uniform-clad back several times throughout the event but he finds no solace in the touch. It does not fill the void in his chest as it had before.

He is empty.

Roy doesn't know how long he stands in front of Ed's headstone. Riza is behind him, as always. He has nothing to say - not like he did for Hughes. With Edward it does not feel like he is talking to the teen by speaking to his headstone. It merely feels as if he is talking to a slab of granite with the name of his son engraved into it.

Son.

He supposes Ed and Al have always seemed more important to him than anyone else in his life, including himself. He briefly entertains the idea of human transmutation before scoffing and turning to leave, waving halfheartedly.

"See you later, Fullmetal," he mumbles. Hawkeye falls into step behind him, still not speaking.

She drives him to his apartment while he stares out the window in gloomy silence. Nothing seems as colorful as it did before, and Roy wonders if that applies to anyone else in the world, or if it's just his emotions clouding his senses.

He's not sure when they arrive at his apartment, or how he makes it into his home, but he takes off his dress blues and hangs them neatly before flopping down on his bed, ignoring the rumbling of his stomach.

He doesn't get any sleep that night.