Sunbeams speckled through the study's window in beautiful golden rays, the faint chirping of birdsong rang like chimes, and the panicked, ear splitting screams of training were over for at least the moment.

With his boots propped up on a coffee table where they had that nice dented spot from him exclusively loafing in this exact position in the study, Magna flipped the page of some chapter book he'd gotten very invested in.

It bears mention that he'd actually bothered with reading because Luck was out for the weekend, and therefore 'fighting for absolutely no reason' wasn't a choice of leisure.

Okay, so maybe he wouldn't admit it out loud, but a good book was kinda kickass to relax with after training was over with, and the childrens' tome in his hands was no exception. He rolled his left shoulder, trying to shake the soreness out of it while he readjusted his back.

Now, the reason for reading a children's book in the first place was because Gordon had hoarded all the base's dictionaries into his creepy alcove in the library. Not even Magna had the gall to intrude on a man who was so desperate for privacy, so it was simpler reading for the Yankee at the moment. And despite how far below his typical reading level this little novel was (it almost wasn't) Magna found himself hunching forward, and squeezing the covers of his enrapturing read.

Flipping the page to discover how Akiko was going to liberate herself from the empress's prison on the planet Smoo, the 'manly man' heard some loud crashing sounds approaching his comfy spot— and fast. This racket was the most normal thing conceivable in the base, so he ignored it even when the cacophony was upon him.

It was more like an explosion than not, the bang the study's door made when it a hole was punched clean through it. The young knight still barely reacted.

"Hey Magna, I have some hilarious news!" Yami guffawed through the door's new aperture before smashing the plank off its hinges to barge into the room properly. Kicking the splintered hardwood into the hall for Asta to tidy up later, the enormous man began his 'funny story'.

"Okay, so hear this: Some loser noble is being sent out of the Clover Kingdom as an ambassador." Yami said, holding back chuckles in much the same way a colander holds water, "It's a diplomatic mission to some enemy nation, rife with dangers like flaky biscuits, and being bored to death."

Magna chuckled aloud at the news, setting his book down to greet the captain with a smile. "Hahaha! That mission sounds awful, boss! Must suck to be that guy!"

"Yeah! It really sucks to be you! Ahahaha!" Yami replied through tears, no longer able to hold back his fits of laughter.

"Yeah boss, my life kinda suc— Wait, WHAT!?"

The fire mage chucked his reading at the ceiling, bolting upright in indignation. "You mean Me!? But I'm not one of those stuck-up jerks from the castle town! What the Hell?!"

"You sure aren't, but the nobles are all too scared, busy, or important to take this mission on." Yami said, wiping the tears from his eyes as he explained, "You're the least important, busy or scared chump out there, so it's up to you to be the snotty loser who vouches for us."

Magna's novel smacked him in the noggin like a falling meteorite, but the fire mage didn't react to the welt it left— too absorbed in the ridiculous news to pay it any mind. Adjusting back his bent sunglasses while going into full 'don't make me do this' mode, Magna said, "Not to be rude, but I'm not exactly a 'snotty loser', Captain. There's no way I'm qualified for this!"

"Oh? Huh, I hadn't noticed." Yami said, as if he actually meant it. "Well, in that case you've got to become a snotty loser. Y'know, sipping tea, writing calligraphy, ballroom dancing, talking all 'proper', dressing like a buffoon… stupid fancy shit like that."

Only remembering this last detail in the moment, the Black Bulls' captain amended, "You have two weeks."

The punk's eyes nearly busted through his shades, and his jaw slacked open, "T-two weeks?! Calligraphy!? Dancing? You mean like learning that crap? But that's hardly any time at all!"

"It isn't, but the nation's monarch demanded an envoy within the month." Yami said, as if it really weren't imperative, "The other captains say it could 'destabilize our political situation', or 'escalate into rampant bloodshed' if we don't meet their demands." He took a theatrical draw from the cigarette hanging between his teeth.

"The month ends in thirteen days, and you'll be starting from square one… so I suppose you'll just have to—"

"—Surpass my limits?" Magna ventured.

"Interrupt me again and you're dead." His captain snapped back with murderous intensity.

Brushing back his messy hair to calm himself, Yami planted a hand onto the shorter knight's shoulder and conceded. "But, uh, yeah, the fate of the Clover Kingdom lies with you becoming the picture of a fancy-pants gentleman. You have two weeks to become our ambassador so… do it."

"I, I won't let you down boss!" The street punk said, saluting with his usual undue vigor.

"You Goddamn won't, or you're dead meat! Your training starts now—" the Captain plucked Magna off the ground and tucked the boy under his arm like a stuffed animal. "—and it's gonna be pure Hell."

As the fire mage was spirited away from his leisurely peaceful spot, he mourned how much further his book was getting from him. When his head got banged on the doorframe on the way out, the only thing on Magna's mind was a simple question:

Why me?