Chapter one: Beginning is nigh and the end has come.

"MURPHY!" I'm startled awake, an old man who I don't know the name of shouts at me. "Murphy we need your useless ass out here NOW!" I'm surprised that someone old is still alive, while the world is slowly ending.

"Whats going on?" I ask

"The damn Zs are attacking again! Its a Zhorde!"

Everyone is out blasting Zs so I run to hide behind a streetlamp, Zs can't smell or hear after all. I'm not sure I can hear either, the sound of gunfire is not only constant but deafening. "Ow!" I shout. Because Zs can't hear or so I thought, a Z starts stumbling towards me. I may be immune to the zvirus, which is given by hidden, snake like fangs. The zvenom must contaminate the bloodstream in order to infect someone. But bites hurt like hell, my best bet is to run away. While I'm running for my life I notice the town we're in, is getting less invaded by Zs the farther out I am. While I'm wonder if everyone else in the group is dead by now, I notice a Rain Forest cafe?! How odd, I'm going to investigate. I open the door, the place is packed with bodies, I freeze not wanting to get mauled by Zs a second time. But they aren't Zs they're just dead people. I inspect one, she smells like vomit and sweat. "Oh dear lord! She died of food poisoning!" In fact everyone in the building even the cooks had died from food poisoning. Suddenly I hear someone crying, it sounds young! I look around to see a small, little, girly, girl.

"What are you doing here? Alone? Little angel?"

"I told them not eat the food! But they did anyway!"

"Food poisoning?"

She nodded. "I don't know what to do, I've been here for five weeks!"

Not caring how she had survived five weeks alone in a Rain Forest cafe. I asked "How do you feel about underage sex?"

"What?"

"I mean take off your clothes!" I say awkwardly, it was weird back then and its still weird.

She looks at me quizzically. I don't think her parents were around long enough to give her 'the talk'. She looks about seven, perfect!

"Okay, sure, I'll just explain it to you first." I need to hurry, I have no idea how long I'll to rape this child before the others find me.

"When a man and a woman, like you and me, love each other very much, like you and me. Like your dead parents probably did. They would-"

A Z bursts through the door, the young child screams! "Aaaaah a zombie!" A knife comes out of the Z's chest! The old man's face show's aggressively from the door. "YOUNG CHILD! THEY ARE NOT ZOMBIE THEY ARE Zs! YOU DESERVE TO BE MURPHIED IF YOU THINK DIFFERENT!" The old man shouts. I nod my head in agreement. Finally someone understands me!

Sadly its short lived when Goody Mick Leadership shows up. "Shut up old man! What's your name sweetheart?"

"Sarah, who are you?" She asks politely.

"That's not important right now! A Zhorde is closing in on this Rain forest cafe, we need to hold out here." He said in a hurried tone. He then handed Sarah a shotgun, "you know how to use this right? Its only got four shots so be careful what you use it on!"

"You press this trigger to fire right-!" The shotgun whizzes an inch from my leg.

"Shit!" I defiantly can't rape her now, damn it!

"Congrats kid, you almost got rid of Murphy for me!" The old man practically falls over in excitement.

"No time for this old man!" The leadership guy shouts. "Fire at the Zs!"

Zs start to swarm in through the windows and doors. We would have been overwhelmed much faster if the Zs weren't contentiously tripping on the bodies of Rain Forest cafe victims a fate much worse then turning.

"No I'm the leader Jackass!" Roberta shouts at leadership.

"Then what am I suppose to do? Have an annoying moral compose?" He response

"Not my problem! Just stop telling people your name is Leadership!" A Z tries to snag a bite of Roberta's flesh while she's screaming at Leadership. Blam! A shotgun blasts through that Z the smoking barrel is held by no over then Sarah. Then two more take its place.

"We are being overwhelmed! We have to leave now!" I shout.

"Fuck you Murhy!" The old man shouts back at me. "We can do this all night!"

"Fine!" I shout back. I start to run to the kitchen maybe the Zs haven't invested there yet? The floor of the kitchen is filled to the brim with Zs eating the dead people. "I hate it when I have to do this." I gradually start to walk through the pool of Zs. "My feet are going to be bones before I reach the other side." I mutter. I can feel Zs nibbling on my feet. Disgusting! I crawl through the kitchen window and fall into a rosebush. "OW! Oh fuck!" My shoes have been eaten off my feet so I walk bare foot away from the Rain Forest cafe, I never want to go into another Rain forest cafe as long as I lived. Since I've escaped the group for a while I decided to try and find an another group or something.

I found another group, that's the good news, the bad news is its a retired jazz band. "Shit!"

"What's wrong Murphy man? Actually never mind, I know what cheers people right up! Hours and hours of a saxophone playing!" The bus continued forward forever, and so would the music. "Gaaaahhh! I should have never left the last group!" I scream. But its drowned out by a never ending saxophone.

Chapter 2

It started as a dull ache inside my brain, an infection that never truly goes away once you get it. After all I've been through, after all I've seen, the only thing the only thing worst, is death. On second thought maybe death is a sweet release of soul, only my soul won't go to heaven, I've raped to many children for that to happen. I've been mutilated by zombies multiple times, I've seen masses of bodies littering the streets, the Rain Forest cafes, I've seen Zs get shot out of oil pipes. I've lived in fear of Zs my entire adult life so far. This life is hell, if I die it will change nothing! But nothing could have prepared me for 8 hours! 8 hours of none stop jazz! I want to die, but hell!

"Please for the love of god stop, stop playing the saxophone!" I beg.

"Man Alvin, the love of god is music. Music is how we know god loves us. You should be grateful man, god really loves you." The saxophone player says.

The driver who has also been playing a saxophone, suddenly screams! The bus collides into a bridge.

"Ohhhhhhhhh damn," The first saxophone player says. "This is baaaad!"

"You think?" I deadpan.

"No man you don't understand music attracts Zs, like craaazzzy man. With the constant jazz music we attract a lot of Zs so we always need to keep moving. But now," He trailed off gesturing to the panicked and frantic saxophone players, squealing on their instruments.

"Oh fuck!"

"yeaaaah man, fuck indeed." Then the saxophone player took out his saxophone and began to play as he did he began to transform.

"What's happening!" I shout at him.

"What was always meant to happen! I am the dark lord Saxophronez!" Saxophronez bellowed. Then the other saxophone player all stopped playing.

"Murphy, I am a god. These" He said gesturing to the other player. "These are my followers, we seek peace and love and music most of all. You shall join us Murphy disregard this silly idea to go to California and stop the apocalypses. Here no one can judge us, no one calls us Jazz asses when all we love is music of jazz. Join us Murphy or be forced to, the choice is your."

At the moment I'm deeply regretting leaving the first group.

"I uhhh… well I suppose? ye-"

The Zhorde of Zs finally catches up with Saxophronez. "Oh shoot, minions, retreat!" Saxophronez and his minions bolt away from the Zhorde, Saxophronez shouting one last thing to me. "You may have gotten away this time Murphy but I'll stop you!" And with that Saxophronez was chased off by the Zs, only the song of slowly fading jazz music remained.

"Well that was a close call… oh fuck." I stand there wondering what to do next. "Maybe I should try to find the others I am humanities last hope and the world would be a better off without jazz players. I walk down the road Zslush dampens my bare feet, there is no I'm not going to get a feet fungus. "Zfuck," Wait… what did I just say? Its almost like I'm part Z, a Zhuman? "Ah whatever its probably nothing." I'll steal shoes off the next dead body I see. Walking to California is no easy task I need to find a new group and fast.

Chapter 3 ZRelations.

I can't believe how quickly the my old group found me, I had barely gotten three miles. As I searched the dead bodies for shoes, the only pare I could find were plastic cowboy boots. I heard a car slowly slur to a halt behind me.

"Murphy buddy! Glad to see ya!" The old man shouts. I should probably learn his name sometime.

"Murphy your looking surprisingly good. Nice boots." Warren said with an annoying chuckle.

"Shut up." I say. My ears are still ringing, I don't think I'll ever stop hearing the sounds of jazz. Damn you Saxophronez!

"Get in Murphy!" Roberta shouts from the truck. "We have gas to collect!"

I get in the back of the truck its always hot and bumpy in the back. I look to my side to see Sarah! How is she still not a Z? This group is awful at keeping you people from being Zifided. How fresh and youthful her sleeping expression is. Maybe being stuck in back of the truck has its perks. I scoot closer to her resting figure. I may never hear again, but at she's not alone.

Hours had passed without interruption, the biggest star in the sky had slowly drifted into night. The old man, a kid, Sarah and myself were sitting in the back of the truck at this point.

"Gaaah!" Sarah shouted as she woke up. Lifting her head from my lap. "How long was I asleep there?"

"Just like five hours," I responded. Best damn five hours!

"I would have done something about that girly, but I'm still mad that you called Zs zombies!" The old man exclaimed. "Isn't that right 10k!?" The kid shifted uncomfortably and looked down. "Plus me and Murphy are like best buds!" The old man continued. "Ain't that right Alvin?!"

It surprises me he learned my first name, and that he's being so nice usually he hates me. Oh well we did play cards for five hours, I thought he'd be upset still since I was cheating. "Yeah, what he said." I respond lamely.

Sarah just scoots away from us and curls in on herself, making small whimpering noises. What's she upset about?! Her parents dying? Sleeping on a scary persons lap for hours? Nah!

"I mean I can't blame Murphy here for being a pedophile, I was a pedophile in my younger years! Its not as bad as its made out to be!" The old man says. 10K who had been sitting next to him moves away. "What!? Why am I always judged when ever I say that?! And I like you kiddo!" The kid looks more uncomfortable, and Sarah is full on crying now.

"Does Sarah know what pedophilia means?" I ask.

"He told her after you left," The kid says finally speaking up, gesturing to the old man.

"Hey, don't blame everything on me, blame it all on Murphy he tried to rape her!"

"Maybe Sarah should sit with Roberta and Warren," 10k quietly suggested.

Sarah nodded and climbed through the truck's broken window. And yes, I did check out her butt while she did it.

"Hey, old man? Can you ask Roberta were we are going to stop for the night. Its getting stupidly dark!" I ask.

"HEY ROBERTA WHEN ARE WE GOING TO STOP!?" The old man yells kindly.

Roberta said something I didn't hear. "We aren't going to stop!"

"WHAT!?" The old man says.

"I said. WE ARE NOT GOING TO STOP!" She yells back.

"Zs are always angrier at night," 10k says quietly. Looking ever his shoulder at the Zs trailing after them.

If I squint he's almost a child, eh its a stretch. I can't believe I'm going to be stuck with these guys all night! Wait a minute! What if I switch to the other car? "Hey I forgot something in the other car,"

"Well Murphy friend. JUMP INTO THE OTHER ZFEAKING CAR AND GET IT!" The old man said.

After some hassling I'm in the other car. Three people are in this car, I don't know any of them! There is a redhead and her boyfriend, her name is Addy, and a black haired chick, who's seems to be having a slow psychotic breakdown. I can relate.

After hour one, I think I made a mistake. Addy and her boyfriend have been flirting back and forth for hours and Blackie (the black haired girl) is quietly shaking with a distant look in her eye. Almost like she was recovering from mind control, eh? Then the car falls into silence, I wonder why the quiet has consumed the car after Addy had been flirting so loudly. Oh Addy's asleep, her boyfriend gives me the eyes. I translate that into quiet don't wake her up! With the added new relief of quiet tranquility, I reflect on my life so far. I stalked the comments of child youtubers, I got arrested, I got turned into a Zman, I've gotten dragged half way across the world, I was almost recruited into a music cult. Saxophronez? His last words to me echo in my aching head. He is coming after me, unless he and his cult were destroyed by Zs. I wonder what he's doing right now?

Chapter 4 Lost and Found.

I, Saxophronez, was completely dominated by the music loving or hating Zscum, of our fallen Znation. Zeeps! The m#therf#kers! My cult of wonderful musician had been destroyed, I was lost and alone. For the first time in my life since I'd first crawled out of underwater volcano. I was alone. No one was there to listen to me, no one was there to compliment me, feed my ego. I'd have to rebuild, nothing in this life or time can put Saxophronez down! With that I throw my black cape over my back and start walking. First things first I need transportation!

One of the many things I hate about this century is the lack of gasoline and cars! How hard is it to find a damned car?! Maybe I got lucky last time? My cult was strong back then. I had so many great minions, all of them lost. What a shame. I see a massive Zhorde heading in an unknown direction. Hmm my curiosity is getting the better of me, Yolo!

Zeeps! Zeeps are everywhere! Literally everywhere! At the very least. I spot a shiny car down below, why were there where so many Zeeps? Maybe it was the noise that got my cult killed. It was a factory of some kind, so I would imagine there would be gas. I guess I'm not alone, I see two cars pull up, Murphy is in one of them! Its time for revenge! I wait for an opportune moment to strike. The little peeps run about killing Zeeps, its hard to tell what they are doing from a distance. I need to get closer!

I creep under the machinery and stuff looking for a chance to attack Murphy and maybe I could recruit some of these guys for my cult? I'd be nice to have them as minions. The urge to boss someone around is getting herd to bare. When all of the peeps suddenly run away for the thumping machinery, what?

A deafening sound rings my heavily pierced ears and knocks me back. I lay looking up at explosions, gasoline fire? Smells like it-a peculiarly large pipe fills my vision and everything goes black.

Slowly feeling returns, the gritty soil in between my fingers, wind whistling past my head. Gentle grunting, the sudden pressure of being nuzzled, and I'm fully consciousness with a headache.

"Ugh I feel worse then the-!?" I don't know! I can't remember anything! I open my eyes, I stare right into the eyes of a horse? This horse has rotting, grotesque skin. I hear dripping, murky sludge drizzles off the creatures body. The horse doesn't seem to care. "Where am I this doesn't look like the 1870s I remember?" I ask the horse.

Metal is scattered across the dusty ground, and fire is everywhere! The horse leans over to try and take of bite of my arm, I slap her away. "Fuck off Bitey! Huh, that's actually a pretty good name for you. Bitey!"

Its obvious to me now no one has taught this horse to respect her master. "Ain't that right Bitey? You don't have a rider." She neighs annoyidly. I grip the back of her neck and prepare to mount. "Go girl! GO!" Bitey respowns well she takes off in a direction. Not having full control over her doesn't bother me. Does it matter which direction she chooses if I don't know which way I'm going? Or where I am? I am Saxophronez a god above men, the inventor of the saxophone, a procter of man. I'm used to weird things. But something is wrong with this world and I need to know what.

And get myself some cult members to play cowboy music!

Chapter 5 A Change of Pace

I always thought riding a horse was second nature to me, an unchanging truth, I Saxophronez could ride like the wind. Maybe nothing is true, for I Saxophronez can not except that I am no longer the lone ranger I remember, it feels like centuries have past. I'm so goddamn rusty!

I hurry on Bitey who is the most unruly lesser being I have ever come across. The pure and raw insanity I feel when riding her is enough to revil my birth over a hundred years ago. Its also highly time consuming to stop and kill peeps to feed to Bitey. I urge Bitey onward, I don't know what I'm looking for maybe peeps with potential to join my cult or maybe just one person who can tell what the hell is going on!

I hear the all to familiar sound of Zeeps making loud groaning noises. Then gunfire, sparks light up the evening sky. When I'd normally keep my distance I feel FUCK it lets just join the fight! I charge my Zorse into battle and pull out my twin guns. The Zorse slows down to a sluggish pase