Rey POV. Takes place right after Babywearing when Rey walks off with Finn to train.

*Most of this is a flashback that takes place after the line break.*

"Rey?" Finn asks as they walk through the flagship's maze-like corridors.

"Hmm?"

"Kylo. He's into it - really into it. Being a dad, I mean."

"He is." Rey feels herself smile, "Can you believe how much has changed?"

"No. I still remember," he pauses as they enter the turbolift and the doors slide shut, "when you told me. Do you remember that day?"

"How could I forget?" She asks as they descend to the floor where the fight simulator is located. There is a gnawing question in Rey's mind, one that has been there for quite some time. She turns to Finn.

"Did you know? Even though I didn't specify it was him, did you know he was the father?"

"Rey. Please. Of course I did."

"Oh. Well."

"I'm just glad you're not sick anymore."

Rey laughs.

"Me too. I am glad for so many things."

And she is. For her friendship with Finn, for her daughter, for Kylo.

The terror she once felt feels far away.

The scalding hot water feels soothing on Rey's skin. The heat is restorative to her muscles, it replenishes her energy, it refreshes her mind. Showers are the only source of comfort she has had these past few mornings. She takes a moment to rest her head against the cool tile wall and inhales a deep breath while exhaling slowly.

The constant nausea and new aches in her body are driving her crazy. Sleeping is near impossible and she is stressed to the point of madness.

The droid at medbay told her in its matter-of-fact way that nausea did not typically peak until 8 weeks into gestation.

Kriffing bullshit.

Rey blanches at the oncoming wave of nausea, her body shivering as she tries to fight it down. Blindly, she reaches for a towel.

Rey. You're up early again. Everything okay?

Oh no.

No no no.

She needs to remember to keep her wall up. Specifically, the wall she creates to keep certain bits of information from making their way through the Force to Kylo.

I'm fine. Preparing for the summit means early mornings.

She senses him forming a response.

I understand. We'll meet later. Take care of yourself. If I were there I would…

Thank you, Kylo. I will.

Rey cuts off the Force before he can continue the conversation.

Kylo doesn't know about the pregnancy. And yet, he grows more attentive and affectionate each time they meet. He doesn't hide anything from her. He is transparent, and the Force reveals what he wants - and it isn't endless sex sessions.

Not that either of them particularly mind what goes on during their negotiations, but she sees his deepest desires clear as day: he wants to be with her outside of confined walls, outside of secret spaces. He thinks the alliance between the Order and Resistance is stable enough for them to come out as a couple.

He thinks of them as a couple.

Rey disagrees - about the coming out bit - and she lets him know it.

Gently, and through the Force, of course.

Kylo seems to be making up for all the years he spent isolated and without human touch. He finds ways to hold her longer, to kiss her just for the sake of kissing her, he tries to make her laugh and…oh kriff.

Rey quickly kneels on the floor, one hand holding back her hair as she vomits into the toilet.

Not good. Nope. The opposite of good.

She needs to appear presentable and composed when the First Order arrives for the summit. Or is it the Order? She frowns. Hux is the only one who still refers to the organization as the First Order and that seems out of habit more than anything.

She needs to finish her paperwork, she has meetings to attend, she needs to ask her droid to help her finish off the dress for the banquet. At the top of her list is a private briefing with Leia to discuss...Rey stops.

Leia.

This - this whole thing Rey realizes, will make Leia a grandmother.

Why is her vision suddenly blurry? Rey palms her eyes, trying not to cry. She simply doesn't have time to deal with this right now.

Time, it seems, has always been a theme for Rey.

Rey is a numbers person. She pays a lot of attention to dates, to time.

For too long on Jakku she lived life on a timeline, measuring experiences, successes, failures. She gave herself credit for all the times she survived. She kept track of the days she spent waiting for her family to rescue her.

She's come a long way since then.

She holds a reputable position that acknowledges her strength and years of hard work. She found her family within the Resistance. For a long time she stopped counting.

But now, she finds herself counting again. It started with one.

She was one day late.

Twenty four hours late.

86,4000 seconds late.

It should have been insignificant.

On Jakku she was hardly regular. Rey chalked it up to a poor diet and perhaps genetics. The reality was that on Jakku she was not having sex and a missed cycle was a blessing. It meant one less thing she had to deal with on the dusty, hellish desert landscape.

But now her cycle runs like clockwork. It has been predictable since she joined the Resistance.

Convinced the contraceptive shot was imbalancing her hormones, Rey consulted with a medical droid. After a series of non-invasive tests it diagnosed her as pregnant.

The droid continued on as if the news wasn't world shattering, rattling off numbers and statistics of how rare this was, but not impossible. When it gave her an approximate due date she broke out into a cold sweat.

Rey flatly responded that she couldn't be pregnant and left.

After waiting a short time to gather her wits, she returned to medbay. Surely the droid would assess her correctly this time?

No luck. Three weeks pregnant.

Three weeks.

That's barely pregnant, isn't it?

Rey tries to find a reason not to take the results seriously and fails. Reality crashes through the mental defense she is so effective at creating.

Her mind is an overwhelmed blur and she churns with more emotions than she can make sense of, but one still dominates them all: shock.

Against all odds she and Kylo manage to create a baby. Rey thinks the term against all odds is starting to become a defining term for them. Against all odds they find their way back to each other, and against all odds Kylo decides to change.

He is more tender and gentle than she ever thought possible. She assumed becoming Supreme Leader would harden him, push him into an abyss of darkness that he would never emerge from.

He is still unflappable, powerful, dangerous - but not with her. Never with her.

She flushes as she recalls the expressions on his face, each one seared into her memory: his vulnerability, his honesty, his lust, his love.

The way she threads her hands through his beautiful dark hair as he moves inside her. The way his fingers stroke the warm wetness between her legs, his thumb slowly circling her clit. The way he sends her into a soaring state of euphoria. She cries out his name under the intensity of his dark gaze, not wanting any of it to end.

There is something nice about surrendering to him when they are together. She knows she is his equal in power and ability - they both know it. But for once, she likes letting down her guard with him. She likes telling him how she wants it, she likes giving him permission to take control.

And Force help her, it is exactly that - those blissful unions when everything feels right - that have gotten her into this situation.

Three weeks.

She really should wait. She should see if it sticks before telling him.

It's still early. What did the droid tell her? That if she makes it to twelve or thirteen weeks the fetus would have a good chance of growing to full term?

Right.

Thirteen weeks. She can wait that long. No matter that that beginning of the summit is today. He's going to want to see her as soon as possible, and if he doesn't keep the mask on everyone will know how he feels. Everyone will see the way he looks at her.

A sharp rapping noise on her door jolts Rey from her sitting position.

"Rey?" Finn's muffled voice floats into her apartment, "You up?"

Rey slaps an open hand to her forehead. How had she forgotten their early morning briefing?

"A minute!" She calls, hurrying to put on her clothes with more effort than is necessary.

"Reeeeeey," Finn groans, "It's 7am. Can I come in for some caf? Please?"

Rey stares at herself in the mirror and she looks...well. She looks awful.

"Sorry about that," the door swings open and Finn gives her a hug.

Rey can imagine how she appears to him: eyes red around the edges, slightly puffy from crying with dark half circles beneath them. But she blinks away her exhaustion—she is used to it by now—and looks him up and down silently. Finn stares at her, a curious expression on his features.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to rush you. I'm running on 3 hours of - you okay? You look a little pale," he explains.

"Oh, I'm fine. So caf, is that right?"

"That would be great," Finn says and strides across her apartment to the bathroom.

Rey thinks about how nice it is to have Finn here, how normal it feels. She prepares a cup of tea for herself as the coffee brews. She takes out her datapad and logs in.

Rey finds herself buried in outlines and summaries when Finn comes out of the bathroom with a confused expression.

"Rey are you - are you sick? The toilet and uh - the floor - it's pretty messy in there." He cocks his head back towards the bathroom.

Shit.

Rey's pale face grows even more pallid.

Idiot, idiot, forgetful idiot, she chastises herself.

Finn sits down next to her.

"You know you can be honest with me, right?"

The sincerity in his voice breaks her heart.

"I do."

"And you would tell me if something was going on. If," he swallows thickly, "If Kylo Ren was hurting you? Because if he is Rey, if this summit is making you so nervous you're sick - then we've got to tell Leia. You can't suffer in silence."

Finn has every right to his reservations about Kylo. He objected to Kylo being in a room alone with Rey. His concern touches her, and Rey's jaw clenches to stop from crying.

She knows this isn't going to be easy. The Resistance will need to know eventually. The revelation paralyzes her with fear. When they learn who the father is - and they will- Rey shakes like a leaf.

It's not like her to shrink in the face of a challenge, but there is someone else to think about now. She is not the only one who will bear the consequences of all this, and there will be consequences. Serious ones. She needs to protect her baby. Their baby.

Kylo will want to protect them, won't he? He won't reject her, he won't deny the baby.

Right?

Kylo deserves to hear this news first. He does. But Rey could use a little tenderness right now. That's all she needs. Just a little support.

Rey closes her eyes, exhales, and decides to just come out with it.

"I'm pregnant, Finn."

Finn's eyes widen and scrutinize her face. There are no other outward signs of how he is taking the news.

Finally, he clears his throat, "I didn't know you were seeing anyone. Is this good news or-"

"It wasn't planned. And I don't want to talk about the father. He doesn't know yet."

Finn runs a hand over his short hair, "Oh, wow. Okay. Wow. Rey. Can I ask one question? Did the father hurt you? Will he hurt you if you tell him?"

"That's two questions."

Finn shrugs. Rey sighs.

"No. He would never hurt me. He wants me, but I don't know if he wants…" Rey bites her tongue, afraid she's given too much away, "I don't know what to do Finn."

"What do you want Rey?"

"I want..." she looks down at her feet, then up again, "I want to have this baby."

"Do you love the father?"

"Yes," she whispers.

"Does he love you? And I mean love. Not obsession, not infatuation. But real love."

Rey nods, afraid to talk for fear of breaking down completely.

Maker, she's a mess.

Finn is so kind, so free of judgement. In the face of unexpected news he keeps a calm resolve.

"Then you should tell him. If things don't go right, I'll be here. I'll be here for both of you, Rey."

Finn hugs her, oblivious to her tears and runny nose. After a long moment they separate and she offers a watery smile.

"Thank you Finn. I can't tell you how much that means to me."

"Hey," he squeezes her hand, "what good is friendship is we aren't there for each other during the hard times? You accepted me even after I lied about being a Resistance member. After I violated your trust."

"Ah," Rey waves that memory away, "that was different. This is...well...not everyone is going to be happy, Finn."

"Because of who the father is."

It's a statement, not a question.

"Yes," Rey says, annoyed that there's still a quiver in her voice.

A moment of silence.

"Eh. They'll get over it." Finn says, trying to make his tone casual. She has a feeling that Finn knows exactly who the father is.

It makes his acceptance all the more meaningful. That he is willing to look past it and act as a pillar of support. Because Force help her, she is going to need someone besides Kylo to help her through the beginning stages of this.

She is grateful it is someone she loves dearly.

Friendship is a form of love and Finn loves in full measure - he always has.

Rey knows this baby will be lucky to have Finn in his or her life. No matter what happens.