To his credit, Jack waited three hours after the time reset and their check-in at St. David's before he went to Ianto's room.

He'd told himself he wasn't going to go, that Ianto needed time and space to process the fact that he was back, that he wasn't going to push.

Then he laid down in bed, closed his eyes and saw identical visions of the master and John, woke himself and realized he was going another damn night without Ianto in his arms.

So he told himself to stop being a little girl and went to Ianto's room.

He knocked once before Ianto opened the door, dressed in a hotel robe. "Three hours, I'm impressed."

Jack blinked "You were expecting me. If you don't want me here I can leave?"

"No, come in, please. I made coffee."

Jack smiled in spite of himself. Same old Ianto.

Ianto sat himself on the edge of his bed, clutching his paper cup of coffee. His hair was curling at the edges, indicating he was fresh out of the shower. Jack sat awkwardly at the desk chair after getting himself one of the coffees. They sat in silence for a little while.

Finally, Jack set down his cup of coffee and folded his hands in his lap, studying his cuticles. "So are you going to ask?"

"Ask what?" Ianto said, looking up at him. Jack swallowed. "Where I was."

Ianto sighed and leaned back to set his cup on the nightstand, giving Jack a flash of bare ass before he sat up again.

"I'm not Gwen, Jack." Ianto said "I know that pushing and shoving and forcing answers out of someone isn't always the best way to get said answers."

"Blunt tool, sharp instrument." Jack said, smiling gently at him.

"I'm not going to cut them out if you either." Ianto said, rolling his eyes. "If you want to tell me, you'll tell me. Your an adult, Jack, I'm not going to force your hand. I couldn't even if I wanted to."

"Thanks," Jack said. Then his smile fell a little. "I… I want to tell you. I do. But I'm also… I'm not ready yet, does that make sense? It-"

"Jack," Ianto sighed, "will you just take your shoes off and come over here. You look like you're about to implode."

Jack's face crumpled, and he untied his shoes before kicking them off and climbing on the bed. He didn't touch Ianto, hesitant until Ianto reached out to him and tugged him closer. Then, and only then, did Jack wrap his arms around Ianto and bury his face in his neck. Ianto ran his fingers through his hair, gently soothing.

"You don't have to tell me," Ianto said softly, "really, you don't."

"But I want to," Jack replied, "I want things to be different, I want us to be different."

Ianto hummed- noncommittal, appeasing. But his fingers skip a beat and pressed up against him Jack can feel his breath hitch.

Jack's good at reading people, and Ianto was nothing if not a product of his century. Ianto wanted that too. Ianto, sweet, gentle, unassuming Ianto who never asked for much, just wanted dates and nights spent together and maybe monagamy.

"We're not like that, though." Ianto said as if reading Jack's mind- or maybe Jack's speaking aloud. "And I don't- I don't need it."

Jack pulled back enough to look at him, and Ianto's eyes were dark and almost desperate. "Jack, I'm enough of a self destructive bastard to take whatever crumbs you give."

This was what he liked about Ianto. Ianto never bothered with beating around the bush.

"But we can be like that," Jack pressed. "I can be like that. I can do dates and flowers and kisses and marriage and I love-"

"Stop," Ianto said, voice pleading, "or at least- slow down, Jesus, Jack no matter what exactly happened that made you decide you wanted to go serious on me, marriage is a pretty big leap from a bit of fun after work."

"You were never a bit of fun after work," Jack corrected, kissing Ianto's nose. "And stuff happened, but more than anything I missed you."

(He also watched Ianto get shot in the head, but he's not going to say that.)

"I missed you too," Ianto sighed, "but really, we're not like that, and it's okay."

He stops any further conversation with a kiss. But Jack managed to stop them from having sex that night, determined to do this right.

And more than that, determined to make Ianto believe he could.

Jack didn't get the time to go out on his own to the store until the next day, but two mornings after his return, Jack watched the CCTV with satisfaction as Ianto gaped at the large bouquet of flowers left on the tourist office.

Ianto dragged them down, and Tosh was the first one to smile and say "oh those are lovely, who are they for?"

Jack loved it when Ianto blushed, because he went red all the way up to his ears. He did so then as he said "me."

Jack grinned and listened to Tosh's cooing with one ear, turning back to his paperwork.

"Are they from Jack?" Gwen asked immediately upon her arrival, and Ianto shouted his reply from the coffee machine Jack's hearing was just good enough that he heard Owen grumpily mumble, "I didn't get flowers."

Ianto made the coffee rounds, and Jack made his best, most innocent, "I've just been working up here all day" face as Ianto came in with the last two mugs.

"Really, Jack, that was completely unesessary." Ianto said, his cheeks still flushed. Jack couldn't stop the grin if he tried "you deserve them. Did you read the card?"

Ianto's lips twitched, a tell tale sign that he wasn't nearly as irritated as he was acting. "Yeah, I'm free tonight."

"Great! I'll make the reservation, we already have tickets."

Ianto's twitching lips stretched into a full out grin. "Sure of yourself, aren't you?"

"I may have peeked in your daytimer yesterday."

Ianto rolled his eyes and turned to leave, pausing at the door. "Carnations?" He asked softly over his shoulder.

Jack glanced up at him with a little smile "they're good apology flowers."

"They are, and… they're lovely." Ianto nodded once at him, "thank you."

Jack waited until the door closed before he did a triumphant little jig in his seat.

II. Harebells

Ianto had said, once, offhandedly, that his mother grew the prettiest blue harebells, and they were a favorite of his.

Jack made a game out of it when August rolled around. He left a harebell on the coffee machine on the first of the month, in the tourist office on the second, and so on and so forth, until Ianto's 25th birthday rolled around, and he had a bouquet of them waiting on Ianto's kitchen counter in the morning.

Waking up next to Ianto was one of Jack's simple pleasures, and on the 19th he woke up early enough to leave, run to the hub, get the flowers and place them strategically on the counter before waking Ianto up for birthday sex.

Afterwards they lazed around in bed, Jack insisting that ianto was taking a half day come hell or high water. When they finally wandered into the kitchen Jack got to see Ianto stop short and then turn pink.

He was really truly delighted to learn that Ianto's blushes went all the way down to his ass.

"Jack, what is that," Ianto said, turning around, and Jack beamed "it's your first birthday present! Well, second. Well, 4th if we count each individual orgasam since midnight-"

"Jack," Ianto interrupted, and Jack's eyes softened as he stepped forward to give him a gentle kiss.

"Happy birthday, Jones, Ianto Jones," Jack muttered, "I'm kinda in love with you."

Ianto's face went even redder, and he swallowed before muttering "what are you doing to me?"

Jack sighed, "I'm trying to be romantic. Is it too much?"

"I, well, I-" Ianto stuttered, looking away. "I- there should not be any other surprises today, or I won't let you sleep here anymore!"

Jack was surprised into a bark of laughter, and Ianto gave him a grin. "And I'll make you sleep on the couch! And I'll tan your behind and send you to bed without dinner!"

Jack howled with laughter, and Ianto smiles before pulling him into a kiss.

"You remembered what my favorite flower was, thank you." Ianto said softly. "I love you, too."

Jack dragged him back into the bedroom after that.

After Ianto got dressed and put the flowers on water, Jack picked the smallest one and threaded it through his buttonhole. As they got in the car, Ianto said "seriously, no more birthday gifts, Jack. I never liked them much."

Jack carefully did not mention the surprise party waiting for him at the hub.

III. Roses (With Chocolate)

It was Valentine's Day, what else was he supposed to do, really?

The dozen roses were left in a coffee cup vase filled with Hershey kisses and flanked by a bag of fancy coffee beans. Jack watched from his the door to hisoffice as Ianto walked in, saw them, and whirled around to glare at Jack.

"Roses and chocolate? Really!?"

"It's Valentine's Day!"

"It's cliche! And I didn't get you anything!"

Jack grinned and ran down the stairs to kiss him and placate him. "You get to take me to dinner tonight."

Ianto muttered a curse. "You and your flowers, Jack, really, I don't need them."

"But I like buying you flowers!" Jack's eyes went sad, "and I heard you talking to Owen a few weeks ago, Yan. Why do you keep pretending like we're not… serious?"

Ianto looked at him for a long moment, then sighed and ducked his head. "Owen teases me enough as it is. And I just… I still can't believe this is real, y'know? Sometimes I think Lisa put me in a coma, or I was converted at canary wharf and this is all some big dream to keep me docile."

Jack kissed him, hard. He pressed him up against the countertop and gave ianto proof of life with his tongue and teeth.

"This isn't a dream," he said afterwards, "I'm right here, and I love you. Owen can deal with it."

"Do I really have to though?" Said a voice from behind them, and they jumped apart to see the three other members of their team standing there, watching them. Tosh looked like she was about to start crying over a particularly cute puppy, and Gwen was flushed like she'd just run a mile. Owen just looked mildly annoyed.

"Really you two," he said, "I'm dead, I don't need to see that."

Ianto pushed out from behind Jack, fleeing the room and leaving his flowers. Jack sighed and gave them some water, heading up to his office.

Ianto emailed him later, telling him to be ready at 7 and he'd get his Valentine's Day present.

The date was expected. The key to Ianto's- to their flat was not.

IV. Gerbera Daisies

Jack hadn't even known that day was special until he heard it on the radio while driving back to the hub from a weevil sighting on April 22nd.

The moment he heard the radio speaker talk about it, he immediately gritted his teeth and swerved the car around, hoping to god the weevil would stay out long enough for him to go to the florist.

He didn't really have the time to personalize a bouquet like he normally did, so he picked the first one he saw and got a silly card and went to the hub.

He unloaded the weevil first, with Gwen's help. Ianto had broken his wrist three days ago and he was on hub duty, leaving them with only two people in the field. Ianto had been in a dark mood ever since, as if finally processing the grief from the bombings and Owen and Tosh.

Jack wasn't sure flowers would be enough to bring him out of it, but he was sure as hell going to try. So after the weevil was secured, Jack got the bouquet, marched into the hub, and placed the flowers and card on Ianto's keyboard like they were a hard won trophy.

Ianto blinked at him, then looked at the card. Then he went pink, and Jack knew his plan had worked.

"Happy national secretary's day?" Ianto asked, voice teetering on the edge of laughter, and Jack grinned triumphantly. "I checked, they didn't have, personal assistant, administrative assistant, or Butler slash janitor slash archivist slash guard dog."

And that set off a snort, which turned into full blown laughter. Gwen started giggling too, and for the first time since the death of their two treasured teammates, Jack thought that everything would be alright.

V. Lilies

The florist Jack always went to was a small, family owned business that had originally been started by a young gentleman Jack had dated in the 60s.

The descendants who worked their now had no idea who Jack was, but Jack liked to keep giving them business. Today's visit was his first in six months. The last time he'd been there, he'd bought Ianto a bunch of tulips, just because he could. That had been a good day.

The next week was the worst one in a long time.

The same man was always at the counter when Jack went there, and as Jack came up to him with his purchase, he grinned jovially at him and said "well aren't you a sight for sore eyes! You were our best customer for a while there, and then you just disappeared- what happened, girlfriend dump you?"

Jack blinked at him, then felt a spike of anger go through him at the man's flippant tone. "Actually he," he stressed the pronoun, which was enough to send the man back a few steps, "died. In the thing with the kids."

The cashier blanched, and quickly tried to apologize in the usual way- "shit, I'm so sorry, mate, I had no idea-"

"Yeah yeah," Jack said viciously, tossing enough money on the counter and grabbing his flowers as he left. "Everyone's sorry."

Jack walked through the streets of Cardiff for the first time in six months, feeling ill. This city had been his prison, then his home, and then his grave, and then his home again. Now the dust of Cardiff was ingrained in his bones and it was making him physically ill to have it there.

The past six months had been like the year that never was, only worse in a way- because he wouldn't get to reach the end of the pain and go home to Ianto's arms. Ianto was gone and Jack didn't realize he could have lived so long and lost so many people and still miss someone this much.

It had been a long time since he'd had anyone like Ianto, Jack reasoned. It had been a long time since someone had known and accepted his immortality. It had been a long time since he'd had someone he wanted to buy flowers for and he monogamous with.

It's been a long time since I've been in love, Jack decided, and shuddered with the truth of the statement.

Yes, he'd loved Ianto. Hadn't been able to say it when it counted, but he did.

He stopped in front of the cemetery gates, clutching his flowers tighter. He swallowed the painful lump in his throat and told himself to stop being a girl.

Ha. Irony was a bitch.

He walked through the graveyard silently, hating the fact that Ianto was amongst uneven lines- he would've hated it.

He stopped in front of Ianto's grave- an empty one, just a marker for the sake of Rhiannon and Gwen. It was solid grey stone, and clearly hadn't been cleaned in a while.

Jack scoffed at that, quickly crouching to brush leaves and dead flowers to the side. "There," he muttered, "That's better. Would've driven you crazy. Rhiannon let it go, how dare she right?"

Jack couldn't even manage a bitter laugh at his joke, running his fingers over Ianto's name. He sighed.

"I'm sorry I haven't visited," he grunted as he sat down fully, pulling the bouquet of lilies out from behind his back. "Got you these. Sorry they aren't carnations, lilies are in season apparently."

(And they were the funeral flower, but Jack figured Ianto knew that.)

Jack laid the flowers down, sighing. "This isn't as fun without the blushing and the token protests and the kisses. I liked giving you flowers, you know. And chocolates, especially dark."

Jack sighed, shaking his head. "You know, I'm actually offended that you thought I'd just… forget you. Yeah, faces fade, but I don't forget anyone, Ianto. Especially the important ones." Jack tried valiantly for a brave smile "and you, Mister Jones, made the short list."

The smile fell, and Jack swiped at his eyes.

The dust was making him tear up.

"Shit Ianto," Jack mumbled, "how do you not get how important you are to me? I mean, god, I don't buy flowers for just anyone. I don't… I don't tell people stuff, not nearly as much stuff as I told you, and it isn't fair that you had to take those secrets to the grave-"

Jack's voice cracked, and he buried his face in his hands with a sob. He wondered how he had tears left, sometimes, after so many deaths and so much crying. How did he have tears to spare and what happened when he ran out.

"The sick part," Jack cried, "was that you didn't need to be there. I could've bluffed on my own, you could've been safe in the warehouse, you would've held me after Stephen and we would've gotten married and-" Jack sobbed again. "And you would've lived to a hundred and eight by sheer welsh stubbornness. And we would've had kids and a house and a dog and oh god, Ianto-"

Jack leaned forward to press his forehead against the cool granite, blubbering like a child. "Oh god, oh god I miss you. I miss you so much. I forgot that it was possible to miss someone. I miss your coffee and your smile and your suits and your blush and-"

Jack cut himself off with a sob, wishing Ianto was there to give him a hug. It had been six months, and Ianto had disappeared into the rift at the house of the dead and Jack was never going to see him again.

"Why'd you have to leave me," Jack cried, "why'd you have to die on me so soon Ianto?"

The lilies caught Jack's tears, they formed little pools.

Finally, Jack sniffed and picked up his head. "I can't stay here," he croaked. "I'm sure you get it. This whole planet is… yours. It hurts. I wish I was taking you with me."

He left without a goodbye to go tell Gwen he was leaving. He left the liles behind.

+I

It was during their stint in LA, right smack dab in the middle of the miracle, that Gwen got the call.

Jack hated the miracle. He hated how weak he felt, he hated the looks Gwen had been giving him, he hated Rex Matherson and the fact that this asshole was alive while so many good people were dead.

Anyway.

The call came one day, right at the same time that Jack's wrist strap beeped. They answered their devices and then turned to eachother with looks of horror and said, in sync, "the rift's just opened up."

They sprang into action, shoving stuff away while Jack asked aloud "how can this happen? I watched the rift close myself- and how do you know about it?"

"I claimed some rift monitoring tech from the wreckage of the hub, I would've told you about it but you left."

"For the last time Gwen-"

"Hey!" Rex boomed, interrupting their back and forth "care to explain what the rift is?"

"We will on the plane," Jack bit out, "I have an American friend who owes me a favor, I was saving it for a rainy day, I guess it's today."

Sure enough, Oliver managed to hop them right across the pond while Jack tried to explain the rift and all its intricacies to Esther and Rex.

"So this rift- you closed it, right? How'd you do that?" Esther asked, and Jack felt his throat close up as he said "I didn't. I was just there."

He didn't explain further.

They landed on an empty air strip, the same one the sky gypsy used, and Rhys was waiting there with Anwen in his arms and wide eyes as they clambered off the plane. He rushed over to them, mouth open when…

"Jack!"

Jack froze midstep, whirling around.

Ianto stood to his left, suit pristine, alive, so very very alive.

The rift opened.

Jack, in that moment, made several intuative leaps.

Jack must've let out a cry or something because Ianto was suddenly in motion, charging full tilt at him and throwing himself in Jack's waiting arms.

Jack clutched him tightly, running his hands over every inch of him he could reach and making sure he was all there. Ianto collided with him at such an angle that his hands were clenched in Jack's collar and his feet dangled off the ground. Then he shifted his weight, and Jack put him down just enough for Ianto to support himself and grab Jack's face and kiss him.

(That kiss shot right to the top of Jack's lifetime long best kisses list, and it stayed there until he died. )

They pulled apart only for air, keeping themselves pressed together from hair to toes, oblivious to anyone around them.

"How-" Jack finally managed, "how-"

"I don't know," Ianto replied, "I don't know, Jack, god-"

"I love you," Jack said suddenly, needing Ianto to know that. "I love you, I love you so much, oh god, Ianto, I love you-"

"I love you too, Jack, oh Christ-" Ianto kissed him again, and Jack's hands wandered down towards his ass-

"Okay, okay! Don't make me get the hose!" Rex shouted, finally breaking through their bubble. Ianto shot him a glare, and Jack suddenly burst out laughing.

Ianto gave him a weird look, and Jack beamed at him "you come back the one time I don't have easy access to flowers-"

Ianto went pink, just as Jack intended, and it was like a missing puzzle piece had been snapped back into place across Jack's life.

Two months later, Ianto helped them stop the miracle.

A day after that, Ianto was shot, and then came back to life after a massive blood transfusion from Jack.

The day after that, Jack went out and bought a mixed bouquet along with a ring.

(But that's another story.)