[A/N: An AU version intertwining the events of 6x12 and 6x15. The only thing I have to say is, if only... Another one-shot for those of you who've missed them. Hope you enjoy reading this story as much as I enjoyed writing it. Thanks so much for all of your continued support, the Upstead fandom has been awesome recently!... Let's keep it up ;) ]

Jay was sitting at the bar with Hailey reflecting on the completely awful week he had; talk about the past getting brought back to the surface and trying to suffocate you. He always knew in his heart he'd never find closure to Lauren's murder, but the fact that he had Matthew Garrett in arm's reach again and still couldn't find it broke his heart all over again. At least that scum was finally rotting where he deserved. It had been another close one though, appearing to most that Jay in fact finally sought out revenge and killed him. Not only did Homicide seem to think he was involved, he wondered if his team had their suspicions as well.

Then there was Hailey… He was so nervous she would think the worst of him too. He had to tell her the whole truth, even though Voight had advised him to keep his mouth shut. After their conversation in the IT room, he realized how foolish he had been for even thinking for a second Hailey would consider the possibility he could kill Garrett in cold blood. She always saw and thought the very best of him… and it broke him to see her so concerned that he could get in trouble. Luckily, it all worked out again… but he'll still never be able to give answers to Lauren's mother. As if sensing his thoughts, Hailey finally breaks their amicable silence of just enjoying the other's presence.

"Long week…" she smiles at him sadly.

"Yea…"

"You alright?"

"I just keep thinking about Lauren's mom. She'll never have closure…" Jay shakes his head at her sadly.

"I get it, but you can't right every wrong Jay. There's just some things, some people… ya just gotta let it go." They realize the irony of this statement as she says it.

Jay looks at her questioningly. "How are you supposed to be a good cop and let things go? That's the point of the job."

"Point of the job is to do the best that you can. Then you go home, pretend like the bad stuff never happened." Jay knowingly watches her take a gulp of beer after she says it and she feels his eyes burning into her.

"Is that what you do?" He can't help but smirk at her.

"No…" She laughs, knowing only Jay knows her enough to not only disbelieve her, but has the balls to call her out on it.

"Yea, I didn't think so…" he chuckles along with her.

It's a nice moment, a very them moment, and for a minute Jay feels completely at ease again, like he always does with her. It's short-lived of course, because right after it her phone buzzes. He watches her quickly flip it over and his heart instantly drops because he knows whose calling.

"Is that Adam?" he works up the courage to ask, knowing his time with her will be cut short if he does.

He stares on as she drops her head down, avoiding eye contact with him, but hearing her sadly whisper out, "Yea…"

As much as it pains him to say what he's about to, he knows he has to. Adam was smart enough to make a move first, as jealous and sad as it makes him, and Hailey deserves whatever happiness she can find… even if it's apparently not with him. She shouldn't be subjected to glumly drink with him all night because of some misguided partner guilt she feels towards him. No, she's made him a better man and he's going to act it…

"You should go…" he manages to get out as confidently as possible, so she knows there's no room for debate.

She stares into his eyes and nods slowly. He stares right back. He almost feels like she's waiting for him to tell her to stay, but he figures it's wishful thinking and stays silent. Hailey gives him one more look, a last chance for him to speak up, their eyes pleading, but he just smirks at her. She resigns and grabs her coat.

"I'll see ya later..." She says indifferently as she starts to walk away.

He still says nothing… maybe he's not a better man, maybe he's still just a coward. He slumps his shoulders and depressingly stares off at his beer. There's a part of him that wants to run after her, but he knows he shouldn't. She's with Adam now and he has to accept that. Maybe this is what he deserves after all, paying for his past transgressions, losing the only person he's ever been truly able to open up to. What he doesn't realize is Hailey turned back around to watch him before she left, and her heart breaks when she sees how sad he still is. She didn't want to leave him… but he practically forced her to go…

A couple of hours later, Hailey finds herself in front of Jay's door. She has yet to knock or alert him that she's there, still reflecting on all of the day's events. For starts, what a parallel she's had the past few weeks of worrying about the two guys in her life possibly going to jail. She was surprised at how much she cared about what happened to Adam as up until that point she had tried to keep things strictly casual. Her feelings for him snuck up on her a little, but they were pretty short-lived because that was also the day Jay discovered their secret fling. That threw her in for a whammy emotional-wise. She's not stupid, she knows how long she'd been burying her feelings for Jay… and it pained her that she didn't tell him about Adam all along, and he found out the way he did. It pained her that she even let things go further than a one-night stand with Adam… it made her feel like she was betraying all three of them at once.

And as if her feelings weren't confusing enough as is, then this week came along… And she realized if she was scared for Adam getting in trouble, it didn't compare to the dread she felt when she thought Jay was. When he told her his side of the story about finding Garrett dying, then Homicide calling him wanting to chat right after, the sinking feeling she had in her chest was indescribable. The thought of something bad happening to Jay was ten times worse than the Adam situation. And that's when she knew. She knew it wasn't healthy the way she was running from her feelings for Jay… maybe she wasn't fully ready to admit them yet, especially to him, but she knew she had to make a start to fix things. She was a little upset that Jay wouldn't let them finish their bar outing together, practically forcing her to Adam, but she realized it was the perfect excuse to end things civilly while she still could. And that's exactly what she did. When she got to Adam's house, she explained as much as she could without giving too much away about her secret feelings for Jay, and they decided mutually to part ways as friends. It had been fun, and they did care about the other… but neither in the same way as they did two other certain people in their unit. So now here she is, nervously about to knock on Jay's door.

"Hailey! What are you doing here?" she feels the familiar butterflies start to form when he opens the door and asks her in slight shock, but looking pleasantly relieved to see her.

She holds up the six-pack she brought as she walks past him inside. "Well, our thing was cut short, so I just figured I'd bring it to you…"

"Yea, but, I thought you were with Adam?" he says as they make their way into his living room to sit.

She cracks one of her beers before she responds. "I was… but I felt like you needed me more."

"Hailey, I'm fine. I don't want to be a burden, you shouldn't wreck your night for me!"

"Jay, you're never a burden to me, and hanging out with you certainly isn't a wreck to my night."

"Yea, but I don't want to cause problems between you and Adam. I get it… you guys are together now, we can't hang out every night, it's completely ok." She watches him sip his beer as he says it, either she's super hopeful, or she does sense slight disdain in his voice.

"Well, you won't have to worry about that anymore…" she responds cautiously.

"What do you mean?"

"Adam and I decided to call it quits tonight…" She watches his eyes go wide, about to speak, so she cuts him off, "And before you say anything, I'm fine! We both agreed that we're better as coworkers or friends anyway. It was fun while it lasted, but no harm, no foul…"

"Hailey, I'm sorry…" he says sincerely and she smiles at him.

"Don't be… besides, now you're stuck with me so I guess I should be the one to apologize."

"There are worse-looking things to be stuck with!" he gives her his best boyish-charm grin and she knows she's in trouble.

She blushes slightly and quickly tries to hide it, grabbing the TV remote. "Alright, enough of that, Halstead… And what is this!? Were you staring off into the dark? The Hawks are in the 3rd period!"

She switches the game on and they briefly take the opportunity to stare at the other seeing it's in commercial, small smiles forming on their face. Both realizing there's nowhere else they'd rather be then here with each other, but neither ready to admit it… just yet anyway…

A month has gone by since Hailey and Adam have broken up and Jay still hasn't worked up the courage to make a move. He doesn't know if he should, still unsure if she feels the same way, or even if they should cross that line… They have grown infinitely closer over these past few weeks though, if it was even possible. Their bond is tighter than ever and Jay is certain he'll never find anyone like Hailey again.

Today only exemplified it more on the case that they had. No one else would believe the confidence he had that Aidan was a good kid caught up in the wrong crowd. But Hailey did, simply because he did. She really had his back today, even though all signs pointed against his opinion. No matter what, she's always there for him. It's something that still surprises him and shakes him to his core. If he didn't already think he was in love with her before, he certainly knew he was after today.

As if on cue, Hailey walks into the Observation Room as Platt is leaving. He watches them pass and say hello, then instantly feels the awe he has for her as she walks over to stand next to him.

"Get anything yet?" she asks as they stare at the suspect.

"No, he knows better than to talk…"

She nods at him. "Ballistics came back on Aidan's gun, wasn't a match… you were right to trust your instincts!"

He watches her dimples form as she looks up at him proudly and he finally decides to ask what's been on his mind all day.

"Why'd you back me? You let me talk Aidan down, when probably, it didn't make sense to..."

She shrugs, as if it baffled as why he'd be confused that she did. "…You looked at me... with Aidan… You looked at me and I got it. I trusted you!"

Jay stares at her, even more stunned about how adamant she is about trusting him. Of course, he feels the same way about her, but his thoughts get interrupted as she actually continues to expand upon things.

"I've trusted you from the day I met you… And if I was gonna follow someone blind, I'd follow you!"

She looks at him, earnestly and vulnerably, and Jay almost can't handle it. He stares down at her, a mix of surprise and awe. He knows this revelation is something that Hailey would not reveal normally, nor lightly, and his heart constricts even more. He needs a second to gather his thoughts; he'd love to give her a response just as epic. He's a few seconds too long though, because as Hailey notices his reaction, she also realizes how much she just put out there between them.

She averts her eyes, gives one last small smile and nod, and with a quick, "I'll see ya later" swiftly walks out of the room.

He stands there staring after her with all the things he wants to say, and all the emotions he's feeling, and all he can muster out is, "Yeah…"

He continues to stare off into the now empty doorway, still trying to process everything; part of him realizing (or hoping for) the underlying meaning of Hailey's words, but completely befuddled. He wonders if he's over-thinking things… maybe she's just being a good partner like always? He can't help but feel there's more to it though… especially with how much closer they've become in the last few months especially. He keeps weighing the pros and cons in his head as he finally racks up the nerve to follow after her.

When he finally makes it back into the bullpen, there's no sight of her, and a quick glance at her desk reveals her jacket isn't draped over the chair anymore. In fact, the only sign of life at the moment is Kevin, who looks to be writing up reports… something he sadly has to do as well.

"Hey Kev, you see Hailey?"

"Yea, you just missed her by a couple minutes… grabbed her coat, said goodnight, and left. Did you need her? She may still be warming her car."

"Nah, it's ok, I'll talk to her later…" Jay says trailing off as he sits down at his desk, wanting to get his work done as fast as possible. He knows exactly where he's headed once he's done.

Hailey's finished the final touches of her pasta and breathes a sigh of relief as she can finally relax after this strange day. She walks over to her couch, bowl in hand, wine already on the coffee table, and settles in to watch her favorite reruns. She's still kind of cursing herself with how much she revealed to Jay a couple hours ago. Sure, she didn't say she was in love with him, but she may as well have! What in the world possessed her to tell him she'd follow him blind!? Of course it was the truth, but she could have stopped after the first confession, Jay had already looked surprised enough. Maybe it's all for the best, her brothers are always telling her she shouldn't keep things bottled up... and at least she booked it out of there before Jay could question her further.

In the middle of her fifth bite, she hears the familiar knock on her door and her eyes go wide. She doesn't even have to look to know it's him. She's so nervous she can feel her palms start to sweat… it's like she's resorted back to teenage girl status trying to ask her crush to the dance. She's probably over-reacting though, this is normal for them, he always comes by… but not normally completely unannounced. She puts her bowl on the table and makes her way over, trying to keep her emotions in check.

She opens the door to find Jay standing there smirking with her favorite bottle of wine. She doesn't realize how long she's staring at him until he makes a joke.

"So you gonna let me in, or am I gonna have to jimmy-rig open this bottle on your curb?"

"Sorry, yea, come in, I'm just surprised to see you…"

"Well, I was going to ask if you wanted to grab a drink tonight, but you took off so fast…" he says looking at her curiously.

"Yea, y'know how it is, figured I'd escape while I still could… Been a while since I had a home-cooked meal."

Jay makes his way over to her stove and dips his head over the pots and pan. "Wow, smells delicious! What is it?"

"It's Pastitsio, a Greek pasta bake my mom always made."

Jay looks impressed. "I didn't know you made Greek dishes! What else aren't you telling me, Upton?"

She smiles, chuckling softly. "I don't… this is the only one I've managed to perfect."

"Well, it looks amazing!" he says as he grabs a plate and helps himself to some as Hailey opens the wine. He takes a bite and softly moans. "Mmm, it tastes amazing too! You can cook for me anytime!" he says smirking.

"Yea, don't get too used to it buddy."

They walk back over to her couch once she pours him some wine and manage to sit quietly for a while as they finish their dinner. They know they're avoiding the topic on their minds, but are enjoying the distraction before breaching it.

After a while, at least a full sitcom later, Hailey senses Jay staring at her. She turns her head to look back at him and shivers slightly from the goose bumps she gets.

Softly, he finally speaks. "So why'd you run before, Hailey?" his eyes soften as they narrow at her, shimmering slightly with traces of affection… and love? She thinks the wine must be getting to her.

"I don't know what you mean?" she quietly fibs.

"You tell me that if there's anyone you'd follow blind, it's me… and before I can even formulate a response, you bolt!"

She shrugs at him, giving her best innocent/confused look. "I didn't know the conversation needed to be continued…"

"So you weren't curious at all to see what I had to say? Wondering if I felt the same way?"

Hailey knows this conversation is going into unchartered waters… the only question remaining, is she ready to steer it? After the past couple years and all they've been through together, maybe she owed it to both of them.

"Jay, everything I said to you was true… you needed to know that I have your back, today and always. And there's no one else I'd trust more to have mine…"

Jay nods slowly, pursing his lips. "And that's all you meant by it?"

"No…" she manages to whisper out shakily.

Jay takes that opportunity to grab her hand and shimmy closer to her. "Hailey…" he says then closes his mouth, looking deeply into her eyes, as if debating what to say.

After a deep breath he continues as she holds hers. "Hailey, I never want to make you do or say anything you don't want to… and I'm not going to force you to admit anything right now, but it's time for me to… I'd follow you blind as well, hell, I'd follow you to the end of the Earth if you'll let me. You're the only person I can truly be myself around, the only one I'm comfortable enough to open up to, and I'm forever grateful to you for that. You were my light in a sea of darkness. I love you as my partner, I love you as my friend, and I just love you…" he trails off as tears well in her eyes.

She feels everything all at once… emotions so strong she never thought she'd feel again, if ever, a humongous weight being lifted off her shoulders, a feeling so freeing that she never experienced, and pure unadulterated love. She doesn't know what to say for a second, but she knows how to act.

She releases her hand from his only so she can softly put both on his cheeks, and pleasantly surprises both of them when she leans in and kisses him. She feels him pull her closer, and untainted happiness is added to her list of emotions.

When they finally break apart they can't contain the smiles that unfold. Once she catches her breath, she speaks again at last. "Jay, you are the only person I'd follow blind, because you're the only one I trust and love enough to…"

He gives her his flirtatious grin. "I knew it!"

She laughs whole-heartedly. "No, you didn't!"

"Yea, you're right… but I suspected today for sure!"

She kisses him quickly again, knowing the light in his eyes is mirroring her own. "Hmm, is that why you showed up with my favorite bottle of wine?"

"Well I know wine loosens you up, so I figured it couldn't hurt!" They laugh as she starts hitting him, while he tries to block.

"What am I gonna do with you, Jay Halstead?"

She squeals as he quickly picks her up and starts carrying her in the direction of her bedroom. "Let's discuss that elsewhere, shall we?"

She wraps her arms around his neck, unable to wipe off the grin from her face. "Fine, but you're making the coffee!"

And then she kissed him again, like she'd been wanting to do for entirely too long, and still unwilling to admit just how. What started off as an incredibly awkward couple months, turned out to be the best in her life. She just hoped Jay could blindly find his way down her hall because she had no intention of releasing his lips…

[Disclaimer: It pains me that I have to do this because I sadly still have hope in humanity and morals, but alas... It's been brought to my attention that some people have been stealing my stories. I ONLY post on FanFiction and ArchiveofourOwn... so if you come across anything of mine on Wattpad or any of the socials, please report it. Thank you! And to the offenders, be better people!]