Chapter 5

Beth and Jerry pulled up their car into a parking space outside Harry Herpson High School.

"I'm really worried about Morty," Beth said, as they got out, "I always knew he had trouble at school, but I had no idea his marks were this bad. Is it possible that we're the ones to blame for this?"

"W-what?" exclaimed Jerry, from the other side of the car, "Honey, what are you saying? We don't have any control over Morty's school time."

"I just don't feel like we've been playing an active enough role in Morty's life," asserted Beth, as she and Jerry walked down the sidewalk, "Maybe there's something important that we've been missing. Like maybe he doesn't get enough encouragement from us."

"We give him plenty of encouragement, Beth!" Jerry said, as they opened the door and entered the school, "If Morty is getting bad grades, it's down to his lack of effort! You don't see any of the other kids here doing this badly!"

"Morty is autistic, though," Beth pointed out.

"That doesn't mean he doesn't have to work just as hard as the other kids!" Jerry asserted, as they walked down the corridor, "And it certainly doesn't help that your dad's always yanking him off into another dimension. We need to start taking this seriously!"

Beth sighed. "I know that," she said, "Let's just go to this meeting and see what we can do. I'm sure it won't be that bad."

"Mr. and Mrs. Smith, welcome," said Principal Vagina, approaching them, "Come along to my office so we can discuss your son's grades."

"Rick!"

Morty slammed open the front door, his face glowing with pride! He ran through the house as fast as his legs could carry him, calling Rick's name!

"Rick!" exclaimed Morty, hurling open the door to the garage with a loud SLAM!

"Aah!" Rick jumped! "Morty!" he exclaimed, "Dude, you gave me a fright!"

"Rick, look!" exclaimed Morty, stumbling over to him, dragging his schoolbag along with him, "Look! Just look at this!" He fumbled inside his schoolbag, whipped out his math test and shoved it in front of Rick's wide eyes! "Look!"

"Eighty-five percent!?" exclaimed Rick, looking at the score on the cover of the test. His face split into an instant grin! "Rikki-tikki-tavi! What did I tell you, Morty? You did it!"

"I couldn't'a done it without you, Rick!" Morty said, in delight, throwing his arms around his grandpa and hugging him tightly, "Thank you, thank you, thank you, THANK YOU! You're the best!"

"Ha ha ha!" Rick laughed, lugging Morty up into his arms and collapsing onto his workbench chair, both of them laughing! "Not even the terrors of teenage highschool can take down Rick and Morty, am I right!?" He wrapped Morty in a headlock and gave him a noogie on the head.

"I don't know what I'd do without you, Rick," Morty said, squeezing him tightly, "If you hadn't stepped in to help, I probably would have just given up!"

"Heh. Well, thank goodness for me, then, eh?" said Rick, affectionately, hugging his grandson back, "I'm proud'a you, Morty. Now!" He stood up abruptly, and Morty jumped off his lap. "What do you say we go on a classic Rick and Morty adventure to celebrate!?" he said, grabbing his portal gun. "Unless there's any—uurrp—bits of homework you need help with?"

"Nah! I didn't even get any homework today!" said Morty, looking chuffed with himself. "Although...we do have a science test coming up on Thursday, and I'm a little bit behind on study."

He bit his lip and looked up with hopeful eyes and a cheeky smile, making Rick smirk.

"Well," sighed Beth, as she and Jerry opened the doors and got out of the car, closing the doors behind them, "That could have gone better."

"Now do you see what I mean?" Jerry asserted, as they walked up the sidewalk.

"Yes," admitted Beth, "I do."

"Well then we need to take this a step forward!" said Jerry, "And that starts with no more sci-fi adventures until his grades improve!"

"Come on, Jerry, don't you think that's taking it a little too far?" Beth said, uncertainly.

"We haven't been taking it far enough!" exclaimed Jerry, "Our son already has a serious learning disability, and your father always pulling him out of school to go gallivanting off on space escapades is doing nothing to help him! Our number one priority has to be Morty's schoolwork!"

Beth sighed. "You're right," she said, defeated, "Come on. I think we need to have a chat with Morty and my dad about this."

"Yes!" exclaimed Jerry, enthusiastically, throwing both his fists up, "Brilliant idea!"

They reached the end of the driveway, and Beth turned the key in the lock, before pushing open the front door and stepping into the house, "Summer, Morty, we're ho—huh?"

Rick and Morty were sitting together at the kitchen table, with several books and assorted papers spread out across the surface.

"Alri—eeurgh—ght, Morty," Rick was saying, holding a bunch of flash cards in his hands, "What happens during the first stage of the cell cycle?"

"The cell makes a copy of each of its forty-six chromosomes and pulls one half to each side!"

"Nice! What's the difference between an animal cell and a plant cell?"

"Plant cells contain chloroplasts, vacuoles and cell walls, and animal cells don't."

"Correct! What's the equation for the size of a magnified object?"

"The size of the magnified image divided by the magnification of the lens!"

"What the hell?" Jerry said, incredulously, making Rick and Morty look over at the sound.

"What's going on in here?" said Beth, in astonishment, as she and Jerry entered the kitchen.

"Oh, hey, sweetie. I'm j—eeurgh—ust helping Morty with some study," Rick replied, "He's got a big test comin' up, and he's t—eeurgh—otally gonna ace it. Aren't you, you little smartass punk?" He ruffled Morty's hair affectionately.

"You bet!" said Morty, smiling.

"Awww," Beth said, tearfully, putting a hand on her heart, "Dad, that's so sweet!"

"Wait, what? Since when do you help Morty study for school?" said Jerry, suspiciously.

"Oh—oh, gee, Jerry, I don't—I don't know," said Rick, sarcastically, his unibrow raised, "M—eeurgh—aybe since I realized my grandson was getting shit support at both school and home for his bad grades and never actually gets a shred of help besides—eeurgh—discrimination for his ASD and threats of sueing NASA."

Beth clamped a hand to her mouth to suppress a giggle.

"Nice swing, Captain Obvious," said Jerry, scowling at Rick.

Rick took a swig of alcohol. "Th—eeurgh—ere're times when shooting straight comes in handy, Jerry," he said, coolly, putting his flask back in his pocket, "Now, if you'll excuse us, Morty and I have some w—eeurgh—k to do."

"Well, we certainly don't want to interrupt you," Beth said, smiling, "Come on, sweetie, let's leave them be."

"But, honey—" Jerry started.

"Now," Beth said pointedly to Jerry, taking his hand and pulling him out of the dining room.

"Oh, and for the record, Jerry," Rick said, idly, as they went, "I don't wanna be, you know, that guy, b—uurrp—ut you might wanna think about how you treat your kid. Cause your tactics are r—uurrp—eally not working."

Morty stifled a giggle.

"What was that, Beth?" exclaimed Jerry, when they were out of earshot, "What happened to talking about the meeting?"

"Sweetie, you saw what was happening in there," Beth said, with a wide smile, "My dad's really helping him. I don't think I've ever seen Morty so happy with himself." Then her smile vanished. "And have you been berating Morty about being autistic!?"

Jerry blanched.

"Alright, Morty, here's a tricky one," said Rick, looking at the next card in his hand, "Name all the sectors of the human heart, in the chronological order that the blood passes through them!"

"OK...uh..." Morty counted on his fingers, "Vena cava, right atria, right ventricle, pulmonary artery...uhhhh...capillaries...pulmonary vein, left atria, left ventricle, and...ummm...what's the last one? Uhhh..." His eyes wandered for a moment or two, before he remembered. "Aorta."

"Jesus Christ!" Rick said, with an amazed expression, "Where did you learn to be so good at this, Morty!?"

"Aw, geez, I think you already know that, Rick," said Morty, smiling.

Rick gave him a knock on the shoulder. "Well, either way, it looks like you're not such a bad student after all."

"Well, I-I had a good teacher!" Morty said, smiling and looking down at the biology book they were working from, "It—it just seems so much easier now! Things actually make sense! I could—I could never get my head round any of this stuff at school, but it's—but it's just so much better doing it like this!"

"Y—uurrp—ou've just got a different mind, Morty," said Rick, with an idle smile, "Kids like you don't learn well under pressure. And your school's a bad environment for that. I—uurrp—actually had a similar problem when I was around your age."

"Really?" said Morty, in surprise.

"Oh yeah, for sure," said Rick, "Except, you know," he added, quickly, "I'm a—I'm a—I'm a genius, so it wasn't—it wasn't that difficult. You wanna go over the cards one more time, or d—eeurgh—'you think you've got it all so far?"

"I think I'm good," said Morty, smiling.

"Well, then it looks like we're finished!" said Rick, plopping the cards down on the table with a satisfactory smile, "Nice job, Morty! You wanna start the next chapter?"

"Uh huh!" said Morty, smiling, "Totally!"

Rick turned the page of the biology book onto the next chapter, while Morty picked up a pen and a fresh card. "Hey, Rick?" he said, shyly.

Rick looked over at him. "Yeah?"

"This is really fun," said Morty, shyly, "Studying with you. Can we do this again? Like...all the time?"

"Sure thing, Morty," said Rick, affectionately tossing an arm round Morty's shouders and rubbing his head with his knuckles, making him laugh, "But we can't forget about our adventures, though! It's like I always say. Life isn't life unless you're living it shooting through a black hole at light speed with a dozen aliens on your tail!"

"Definitely not!" said Morty, smiling.

"And we've gotta leave some time for Interdimensional Cable, too, don't forget! You wanna grab some pizza and go for some Ball Fondlers after this?"

"Oh yeah! Ball Fondlers rule!"