Summon All The Courage You Require
(A/N): BEFORE YOU READ THIS: just wanted to say thanks for reading this far and giving my wild fic a shot. i guess i can only hope you enjoyed it as much as i did *blows kisses*
but without further ado, enjoy the finale!
It was so quiet.
The sun had barely risen, the morning light and cool breeze moving through the trees. The sky was a beautiful blue. Birds were chirping back and forth. The river bubbled happily behind us. And I sat in the middle of it, Krel's head on my shoulder and his legs over my lap as I held him.
Why did it have to be quiet?
Why couldn't the world be as loud as I wanted to scream?
The minutes went by at an agonizing pace. I tried to will it faster, but the sun continued to slowly inch up the summer sky. So I continued smoothing Krel's hair over the way Mama used to, staring blankly into the mountain ahead of us. Krel didn't have much time left, but there was nothing to do but wait.
And I've always hated waiting.
I still had one hand clenched around the button. It took me until I looked down at it to realize I was trembling.
Footsteps crunched in the grass behind me, so far away they almost sounded like a hum. I heard deep, adult voices chattering over things I didn't care about. I heard someone coming closer and my grip on Krel tightened. Suddenly, I didn't feel scared or anxious or even desperate.
I felt angry.
But the second I saw Zadra's face, it all melted away.
Guarded horror filled her eyes when they landed on us, as though she had prepared herself for what she might see, but was still undone by it. The two of us covered in dirt and blood, Krel shivering and gasping as I held him in a vomit stained blanket.
She lowered herself onto her knees beside me. She reached for my shoulder, but I flinched away.
"Please," Fresh tears spilled down my raw cheeks. "Help him. Please."
Her face fell, anguished. "Oh, Aja -"
"I'll go with you," I pleaded. "I'll do what you want - I'll do what they want. Whatever it is, I'll do it. Please," A sob burst from my throat. "Please just help him."
Zadra had to swallow before speaking. "Can you stand?"
It wasn't easy. My legs were aching and tired. My whole body felt like it was underwater. But I shifted and I grunted and I raised myself to my feet, still holding Krel.
Zadra lead me around the boulders, the three SUVs surrounding us coming into view - and all the people coming out of them. The second I saw them I started backing up, clutching Krel protectively against my chest.
My back hit Zadra's front, her hands coming onto my shoulders to hold me in place. "Aja," She whispered to me. "You need to let go now."
But I couldn't. They had to pry him out of my arms.
I tried to go after him, my arms reaching out to hold him again as they whisked him away. But then Zadra was holding my waist - holding me back. And I cried. I begged and pleaded for her to let me go. But she held me tight, so much it was suffocating.
"It's going to be alright," She said. "Krel is going to be alright. You are safe now, I promise."
I only cried harder. Harder than I had in a long time. I screamed and I struggled, kicking madly against the hands that pulled me forward. This was a mistake. A horrible, horrible mistake. I never should've called them. I never should've let anyone take me away again.
A terrible noise filled the air, but I didn't realize it was my own screaming until Zadra put her hand over my mouth. Her arms were twisted around me, one around my waist, pinning my elbows to my sides, and the other keeping my mouth shut.
"Please calm down," Her voice said. "You need to calm down. Everything's okay. I'm not going to let anyone hurt you. I'm right here."
But I didn't want her to be here. I wanted my Mama and Papa to be here. I wanted my brother. I wanted my family. I wanted to go back to when I was innocent and untouched and go home.
And I didn't want to be touched.
So I bucked and I writhed and I bit into her hand to get it off me. It all became a blur until I felt the leather of car seats press against my cheek. The feeling of going limp. The feeling of cushions beneath me. Then everything was warm and dark - and someone's hand was rubbing my back. And sobs, racking me so hard it hurt. And then -
And then -
I woke up. Slow as always. But still up.
I was in a bed. Wrapped in a fluffy blanket. Warm and safe. Someone's hand was over mine, their promises in my ear. I could almost make out the words through the fog.
My eyelids finally began to flutter, and I felt the hand pull away. The gentle voice disappeared. But I wanted it back. I wanted to know what words demanded that level of reverence.
My head was still full of fog, my body so heavy as I pried myself up. The room blurred around me, making me blink to force it into focus. Then the face before me came into focus.
The tears came almost instantly. Like a knee-jerk reaction.
"Varvatos?" I choked.
His old smile was so gentle, so familiar it wrenched at my heart. "My princess."
For a moment, all I could do was stare, seeing all the changes the years had brought to his face. His wrinkles carved deeper. His hands all the more calloused and rough. And the guarded look that always loomed over his eyes peeled back as the tears appeared.
He stared at me too, his old, grey eyes scanning over all the changes to my face. All the changes he hadn't been there to see.
Varvatos's hands reached for me, but he hesitated. I hesitated too. It was strange, as much warmth was bursting in us, we didn't know what to do with ourselves. Or each other. We didn't know what boundaries should be between us.
But in the end, my heart won out and I threw my arms around his neck. And he held me.
"I missed you," I cried, the tears making my eyes ache. "I missed you so much it hurt."
He cradled me closer, the way he had the day half the girls on my basketball team died. The way he had when we managed to escape being caught by trolls. Like no time had passed at all.
"Varvatos missed you as well," He said. I'd almost forgotten what his voice sounded like. "More than he thought he ever could."
"I'm sorry," A sob hiccuped in my chest. "I'm so sorry -"
"Varvatos is sorry too," He whispered. "This is Varvatos's fault. It is a debt he can never repay. Varvatos has not had a moment's rest since."
I sniffled, burying myself in his collar. His aftershave smelled just as strong, filling me with the scent of home. "I don't see it like that anymore."
His grip on me loosened, his face pulling back to see mine again. As though he thought he'd heard me wrong. "Yes, you do," He muttered in disbelief. One of his hands ran over my hair. "After all Varvatos has done, you must."
I shook my head, pulling him close again. But he was too shocked to hug back. "I don't," I said. "I just love you."
And the great Varvatos Vex, Commander and veteran, war hero and marine legend, trembled as he held me.
I didn't notice the door to the room had been opened until he leaned back, looking over at Zadra's form. There was another girl coming in after her, no older than I was. I had to blink a few times, pushing past the overwhelming feeling in my chest to see where I was.
The room was like a bedroom. Pale purple wallpaper. Thick curtains over the window. Bright white dressers. And a mirror on the wall, letting me see my reflection as I sat up. I wasn't covered in dirt or blood anymore. My clothes had been changed. My hair had been combed.
Varvatos was sitting in an armchair he'd pushed closer to the bed, still leaning over to hold my hands. And I didn't want to let go.
"Where am I?" I asked.
"You are stationed in a safehouse," Zadra answered. "In Maryland."
The girl beside her had dark hair pulled back into a ponytail and a deep cut across her nose. When she saw the tears on my face, she scoffed, rolling her eyes into the ceiling. I felt mine narrow.
"Where have you been?" Varvatos asked, his voice so soft he was almost whispering. "My princess, where did you go?"
The girl gagged. My glare intensified. "Who the hell are you?" I snapped.
"This is Lena," Zadra said. "She's the only other Orange with the League."
"I'm also in charge of training for the teams," She sneered. "So you answer to me now."
I sat up taller, using Mama's voice when I replied. "I answer to no one."
She scoffed again, like I was nothing but a lost, little child.
"Aja, we need to know where you have been," Zadra came closer to the bed. Suddenly, I couldn't look away from her face. It had been so long since I'd seen her - even if it really hadn't.
"I've been at Trollmarket." What was the point of keeping that a secret now?
Both Zadra and Varvatos got guarded looks on their faces, a strange sympathy in their eyes. So they had heard what happened. Does that mean they knew how it ended?
How it ended for Steve?
"Good to know," The girl sneered. "You've been sitting on your ass doing nothing while we've been wasting all our time tracking you down. Pathetic."
Zadra's eyes flared. "Lena -"
"What?" She rounded the bed. I didn't break my eyes away, daring her closer. "Am I wrong? God, people like you aren't worth the shit you give the world. Walking around thinking you can get whatever you want 'cause Mommy and Daddy are famous enough -"
I reached out and put two fingers on the back of her hand, seeping into her mind. I saw the harsh walls of the bases. The screaming instructors. The bombs she was tasked with carrying inside buildings, getting into peoples heads to make them think, oh yes, I did order a package, didn't I?
The sad part was she actually thought she knew what power was. She thought she knew what it was to be in control. She honestly thought she was stronger than me.
"What's your name?" I asked.
The scowl from her face fell. Her eyes darted back and forth as she went pallid. "Uh-h -"
"Where are you from?"
She stumbled back, her breath suddenly coming in rapid gasps. She looked wildly between Varvatos and Zadra, as if they could give her some kind of clue.
"Do you know where you are now?"
I almost felt guilty when I saw the moisture gather in her eyes. Almost.
"Then maybe," I hissed, glaring through her. "You should leave."
She scrambled for the door, hiccuping as she cried. I glowered at the closed door in her wake, feeling the way Zadra and Varvatos were looking at me. The way you look at a bear you've stumbled upon in the woods.
And I didn't care.
I wasn't the little girl they had pulled out of Thurmond all those months ago. The one who had cried and pleaded not to be left in a dark box. I was something very different now.
They'd do well to remember it.
"Impressive," Varvatos murmured.
"What happened to Krel?" I looked back at Zadra. "How is he?"
"We managed to flush the toxins out of his system," She replied, nodding slowly. "You called us just in time."
I swallowed the lump in my throat. "Will he be okay?"
"Yes," Varvatos said, still unable to raise his voice to the volume I remembered. "Krel will alright."
I let the walls around me crack, tears falling. He would be okay. This wasn't for nothing. He would be okay.
The bed sunk a little as Zadra came to sit beside me, her eyes full of quiet concern. "How did those toxins get into his system in the first place?"
"Goblins," I growled under my breath. I didn't need to say any more.
"He is here in the building," Varvatos reached for my hands again. "Do you wish to see him?"
"How long have I been out?" I asked.
"A few days," Zadra replied. "You needed the rest."
If Krel was here, and I could get to him, and we could get away together. Just like we had at the gas station. It wouldn't be hard. Anyone gets in our way, all it would take was a finger on their hand and -
"I wouldn't try running if I were you," Zadra gave me a pointed look, as if reading my mind.
"You couldn't stop me when I was nine," I shot back. "What makes you so bold now?"
She pulled a small silver, device from her pocket. It took me a moment, but I saw the speaker on the end of it. A Calm Control device.
White Noise.
"Every agent downstairs has one of these on hand," She said. "Not to mention if they even suspect you'll try something, they will shoot Krel for your insubordination."
Icy horror took over my body, freezing in my veins. I didn't want to believe it was true, I wanted to call her bluff. I wanted there to be a chance. But I saw the truth her eyes - saw the two kids Zeron had shot point blank for no other reason than being alive.
The League had spent countless resources tracking me down. They would do anything to control me now.
"I guess we'll be spending lots of time together now," I kept my glare on the ground. "Won't we?"
Neither one of them denied it. We were trapped here.
"It was inevitable from the beginning, wasn't it?" I said. "Eventually, you would have to bring me in."
"You're a valuable asset to the resistance," Her voice was flat. No emotion. I began to wonder why she had joined the League in the first place.
"What about Krel?"
"He is a security risk," Varvatos said. "For all that he knows, and the fact that he has tried to defect."
"He is safer with us," Zadra said.
I balled the pale sheets into my palms. "No, he is not."
None of us said anything for a moment, letting the words sink in.
"He told you," Varvatos said.
"He's my brother, he'll tell me anything."
Zadra took a measured breath. "Aja, you must understand -"
"You knew," I spat. "Both of you did. And you just let them hurt him."
"There is more to what happened than that." But Varvatos still hung his head in shame.
"I don't care what more there is," I steeled my voice again. "If you want me to cooperate - if you want me to use my abilities, or do testing on me, or whatever it is, I have one condition. You let Krel go."
Zadra stiffened. "Aja, he knows too much. We cannot -"
"Yes, you can," I snapped. "You owe it to him. Both of you do."
Zadra and Varvatos locked eyes, the stiffness going between them. The calculating. The indecision. They'd thought about this before.
"If you do not meet my condition," My voice was raw and clear. "Then I will refuse to cooperate. I will not move from this spot until you drag me. I will not speak a single word to any member of the League."
"Aja, please -"
"I do not care," I hissed. "How much White Noise you play in my ear, I will attack the mind of every agent that dares to touch me. I will make this place hell for everyone who sets foot in it, and I will drag everyone down with me. I can do so much more than you've seen from that brat - things you couldn't even imagine. But you won't see another stitch of it until Krel walks free."
Varvatos lifted an eyebrow, a hint of pride in his eyes. He looked up at Zadra and I saw the same look in her face. But then it deflated.
"Aja, even if we did this," Zadra rested a hand on my shoulder. "Krel joined the League to find you. He won't leave if you stay. He won't let you make that trade."
"You have been inseparable for as long as Varvatos can remember," Varvatos said. "Perhaps it is best you stay that way."
"No," I threw the word in his face, tears in my eyes. "I'm not letting anyone hurt him again."
"What about you?" Zadra asked. "Krel will refuse to leave, you know that. He won't abandon you, Aja."
I swallowed. "I can fix that."
The room Krel was in had blue walls, robin egg blue. It was a bedroom not unlike the one I was in, just basic furniture and a curtained window.
A doctor was exiting the room when we arrived, pulling Zadra aside to discuss something about Krel's IV. She waved me forward mid-conversation, giving me the green light to open the door.
Krel was sitting cross legged on the bed, beside an IV bag hanging from a pole, picking at the scabs on his hands. He wasn't covered in dirt or blood. He wasn't drenched in sweat. His breathing didn't sound like sandpaper. He wasn't twitching or jolting or choking on his own saliva.
He was okay. A little flushed, but okay.
I almost couldn't believe it.
When he looked up at me, he smiled. Hopping off the edge of the bed, he rose to his feet and held out his arms.
"What are you waiting for?"
A smile broke out onto my face as I walked into his arms, hugging him tight. "I'm glad you're okay," I whispered.
He gripped me tighter.
"How are you feeling?"
He sighed. "Tired, I guess."
"Here," I lowered myself onto the edge of the bed, pulling him down to sit beside me. "Has the doctor cleared you?"
He held out his arm, showing me the bruised hole in his elbow. "He just took out my IV."
I grimaced at the mark, holding up the edge of his elbow. But then my eyes fell to the red 'X's carved into his palms and I lowered his arm. "Do you remember what happened?"
"Yes," He nodded slowly. "I mean, it's gets a little fuzzy after . . ." He fingered the syringe mark on his neck and tried for a nervous laugh, but I didn't laugh with him. It was a few beats of silence until I could find my voice again.
"Thanks for the password, by the way."
A hint of a smile crossed his face, the hurt hiding in his eyes. I rested a comforting hand on his shoulder.
"How did you get Seamus to tell you his password?"
"He didn't," Krel said to the floor. "I guessed it. Emma was his mother's name."
"Oh."
"What happened to him?" He risked a glance up at me. "What happened to all of them?"
I exhaled, thinking back to when Blinky and Toby had gone to 'detain' Seamus. I hadn't seen him after that, I didn't even know where he was. I didn't know where any of them were. I rattled off the attack to the best of my ability anyway. Krel deserved to know what he had prevented. The lives he had saved.
"We never would've gotten them out in time without you," I told him.
"And," He almost began to grin. "They never would've gotten Morgana out of Claire without you."
I brushed a piece of hair behind my ear, shrugging.
He pushed his fist against my shoulder. "Knew you could do it."
A knock sounded on the door behind us. My stomach was very suddenly tied in knots, so tight I felt nauseous. I only had a few minutes left to do this. I had to do this. But when I looked back at Krel, a part of me doubted that I even could.
"I'm sorry," He whispered, bowing his head. "I - I'm so sorry, I -"
"What are you talking about?" I shifted towards him, ducking my head to see his eyes. They were full of tears. "Krel, what could you possibly be sorry for?"
"For getting sick again," He looked up at me miserably. "For making you risk your life to save me again."
"No," I shook my head at him. "No, this isn't your fault, Krel. It's Seamus's."
A wave of hurt appeared in Krel's eyes, his head dropping into his hands. I wrapped an arm around his shoulders. "I'm so sorry, little brother."
He shook his head at the sheets. "It doesn't matter."
"Of course it does," I rubbed his arm. "I - I know you kissed him."
Krel's head shot up, eyes wide and face bright red. "Wha - how -?"
"Seamus told me."
He looked even more betrayed. "Why?"
"As a taunt," I said. "He was going to get rid of me too."
Krel looked away again, a tear sliding down his cheek. I wiped it away.
"He never cared about me," He muttered.
"I don't know," I replied. "Maybe he did, he just . . . didn't understand it."
Krel shrugged, still glaring at the floor. I hugged him tighter.
"I care about you," I said. "You know that, right?"
He gave me a sarcastic smile: duh.
Another knock. It nearly took the breath right out of my lungs. Zadra was getting impatient. I was running out of time. I could do this. I could do this for Krel.
This is worth my brother's life.
"They probably want us out soon - hey," Krel reached for my trembling hands. "What's wrong?"
I bit my lip, shaking my head as I desperately kept the tears at bay. "Nothing."
"We're going to be okay here, Aja," He promised. "We'll protect each other. Just like we always have."
I couldn't look at him. If I looked at him for another second the secret threatened to come tumbling right out of my mouth. The deal. The real reason I was in this room. Why did I want to tell him so badly?
Because you're his sister and you'll tell him anything.
"It's going to be okay," He pulled me forward into a hug, my shoulders shaking against his. "Zadra and Varvatos are here, and I'm here, we're all here. We'll be okay as long as we're together."
I bit my lips together to keep in the sob.
"Krel?" I forced my voice to be clear. "Do you - do you ever think about what our lives would be like if Psi never happened?"
He let out a dry chuckle. "All the time."
"We'd be back with Mama and Papa."
"Back on the base."
I leaned back. "We'd be in high school."
"Teetering on the edge of expulsion as always."
I giggled. "We could finally try that water fountain prank."
"The one where you make it explode?"
"It's quality humor."
"Yes, besides that," Krel laughed with me. "You'd be known as the star athlete for every sport event the academy offers."
"And you'd be graduating early," I replied. "With your associates and a full ride to MIT."
"And we'd go see the stars every weekend."
I nodded, smiling as the pain in my chest grew. That life - that perfect life. The one that had disappeared the morning I banished myself from my parents memories.
"We'll never get that life back," Krel said. "Will we?"
"Maybe not," I replied. "But we have this one."
He scoffed.
"I mean it, Krel," I put my hand on his shoulder again. "We'll get through this. And twenty years from now, we'll be with Mama and Papa again, and we'll be back on the base, and you'll be getting the Nobel prize for one of your crazy inventions and I'll be in the back messing with the water fountains."
"And this will all be behind us," He said. I could almost see the hope in his eyes. "Do you really think it could happen?"
"I believe it can," I said. "We'll all be together - and we'll all go home, one day."
One day. One day I'll come back for you. This isn't goodbye.
He just nodded, looking away again. I pulled him back into my arms, hugging him as tight as I could.
"I love you," I whispered. "No matter what happens, don't forget that."
He let out a small laugh. "Of course I wouldn't forget that. After all, I love you too."
I gripped him tighter, holding on to those words for the split second that I could. Then I leaned back, moved my hands to either sides of his face, and pulled his forehead against mine, right over my scar.
His mind was more guarded than most, I'd always known that. It was like breaking through glass. Not as easy as you would like it to be, but still doable. All it required was some pressure and -
"Aja," I heard him say. "What are you -"
I felt his hands on my arms, trying to shove me back. Trying to twist away from me.
Stop stop stopstopstop, his mind screamed. What are you doing? What are you doing? Aja, STOP.
But I held him fast. The glass around his mind shattered. And he stopped struggling.
The first memory he had of me was when we were barely toddlers.
It was the image of two year-old me climbing up his crib, leaning over the top of it and making faces at him. I pulled it out of the filing cabinet that was my little brother's mind, holding in my hands to savor it. How innocent and untouched we were then.
But not anymore.
One by one, I rifled through each drawer in Krel's filing cabinet, plucking away every memory of me riddled between them. Day by day. Piece by piece. Until there was nothing left of me to weigh him down or bind him to my side. It was a strange, unwinding sensation - something I'd never felt before. Like I was untangling us.
Krel never had an older sister. He was born and raised an only child. But all the fun he'd had, all the adventures, all the trouble he'd gotten in and out of, was with a friend. A neighbor. Someone he'd cared about as a child, but could only vaguely recall now.
Someone that didn't matter.
He'd joined the League to look for his parents, and he'd had the courage to run from them on his own. He'd found Steve and Eli by chance. He'd found Trollmarket with them. And his friends were still out there, should he ever need them.
I gathered the memories of me into a neat pile, holding them inside me for a moment. This was the last thing left of my broken family. It belonged someplace close to my brother's heart. So I sealed them in a box, and left it on top of his filing cabinet, where he would never find them, but always feel them.
It was a little part of me that he would carry with him, wherever he went, even if he didn't realize it. Reminding him that his curiosity was a gift. That he could do anything he put his mind to. That he was strong enough - brave enough - to chase the light.
The last piece I left was a piece from my mind. A simple truth for him to hold on to: he was loved. Wherever he went. Whatever he did. He was unconditionally, unapologetically loved.
Don't forget that.
When I pulled back, Krel's eyes were staring blankly forward, in a kind of daze. His hands were still stiffly latched onto my arms. I had to pry them off.
My knees shook as I stood up from the bed, my footsteps heavy and loud in the silent room. I watched my hand turn the doorknob, but I barely felt it.
Zadra was waiting for me in the empty hall, arms crossed and face guarded. I closed the door behind me, pressing my back against it. I couldn't look at her. "It's done."
She didn't say anything back, she just took my arm, gently leading me downstairs to the front room with an open window overlooking the early morning roads. When we got there, she handed me a backpack.
"What will I need this for?" I asked.
"It is not for you," She replied.
Several minutes later, Krel entered the room behind Varvatos. His face was stern, somewhere between irritated, angry, and guarded. When his eyes landed on me, not a single hint of recognition appeared. He scrutinized me up and down instead. He'd never looked at me like that before.
It hurt so much worse than I thought it would.
"What am I doing here?" He spat to Zadra. "What even happened?"
Zadra took a measured breath. "You were abducted by goblins -"
"Yes, yes," He waved his hand. "That I remember. How did I get here?"
"The goblins gave you a lethal injection," Varvatos kept his voice perfectly even. "And then left you to drown in the river. You were lucky this young woman happened to find you before you could."
He squinted at me, folding his arms as he looked me up and down yet again. "Who are you?"
Varvatos came to stand behind me. "She is a valuable ally of ours. And now, yours."
"But why is she here?"
"Because she saved your life," Zadra snapped.
"And to give you this," I watched my arm hold out the backpack, questioning if it was even mine for a moment. "You're going to need it."
"What would I need that?" He looked between Zadra and Varvatos. "What is going on?"
"You're leaving," Zadra said.
"Leaving where?" He asked. "They haven't even put me back on a team."
"Leaving the League, my prince," Varvatos said. "Today."
The anger in his face melted away, blinking in shock back at them. ". . . What are you talking about?"
"We're getting you out of here," Zadra said simply. Even though it was anything but simple.
Krel glanced at the front door. "Now? Just like that?"
"Just like that."
He swallowed, still unable to believe it. I watched tears fill his eyes. "I don't -" He shook his head. "Why?"
Varvatos exhaled softly. "Because we owe you that much."
Krel looked completely floored. It was too good to be true. To be real. But it was. His eyes darted between them, something between gratitude and disbelief across his face. As if he was trying to say 'thank you' without words. When he looked at me, the look vanished.
I swallowed the lump in my throat and held out the backpack again.
"No thanks," He pushed my arm away. "Not interested."
He turned towards the door, but I caught his arm, returning his stern glare. He was leaving with this backpack one way or another, damn his stubbornness.
For a moment, I almost saw something flicker in his eyes. Something familiar. But he shook it off before it could become real.
"Who are you really?" He hissed under his breath. "Are you really one of them? You seem to have a lot more sense than that."
"It doesn't matter who I am," I shoved the backpack against his chest. "Just get out the hell of here while you still can."
Something more flashed in his eyes. Sympathy. A kind of compassion I'd seen a million times. A softness that Krel had always had inside him.
Please, God, protect that, I prayed, digging my fingernails into my palms. Protect my little brother with everything you have.
He turned away from me, looking between Zadra and Varvatos as if that counted for a proper goodbye. Zadra nodded gently in reply. Varvatos gave him a soft smile. And Krel turned towards the door.
I felt the skin on my hands break open under my fingernails, watching him walk away. Out into a world that was so eager to tear him apart.
"Wait," My mouth said the word without my permission, my legs jogging over to the open door. Krel was standing on the front porch, glancing back to look at me.
"Good luck."
He looked at me for a moment, a flash of amusement in his eyes - as if some part of him still remembered the joke. But then they landed on the ridge between my brows and all amusement faded.
"You too."
Then he turned and made his way across the lawn, pulling the hood of his jacket up as he crossed the street. And disappeared into the distance.
I closed the door, hollow and empty. A part of me was gone. So many parts of me were gone. Following my little brother wherever he decided to run now.
I thought back to the prayer my parents had said over me all those years ago. The last thing they ever really said to me: Let her know her family will never forget her.
But they had. All of them had now. I wasn't Aja Tarron anymore. I wasn't a sister, or a daughter. I didn't know what I was anymore.
"The League is not Thurmond," Zadra said behind me. "You can be happy here."
"We will take care of you, my princess."
I could fall apart, I realized, staring into the grains of the wooden door. Here and now I could drop to my knees and scream and cry myself silly. I could lose my mind over how unfair it was. I could lose myself in the pain. And a part of me wanted to.
My eyes drifted to the open window, watching the sky blush with light. Mama and Papa's words rang in my ear as I took in the view, from my very first day at Thurmond. The sun is rising, Aja.
But not today.
Instead, I stepped back from the door and turned around to face Zadra and Varvatos. I straightened my spine. I lifted my chin. And I borrowed Mama's voice one last time.
"I'm ready."
And I was.
(A/N): YES THERE IS A PART 2
AM I GONNA POST IT SOON? HELL YEAH (believe it or not, it's actually all done and ready to go, so yeah im just gonna start doin daily updates ;))
but i can tell you guys that this story has been my pride and joy and i'm over the moon to share just a fraction of that with you guys!
Thank you all so much for joining me on this journey, it has been a pleasure *takes a bow*
Until next time, loves! *blows kisses*