Xena and her two companions had spent the last four days traveling up the western coast of Euboea. For once, the warrior was glad that she and Gabrielle had a tag along traveling with them. Aleta had kept the bard engaged in friendly conversation while Xena had passed the days in brooding silence. Xena could tell that Gabrielle enjoyed having someone new to try her stories out on too. It wasn't that Xena didn't recognize her friend's bardic talents, it was just that Xena didn't like hearing herself immortalized in verse and she'd heard the age-old stories of the gods and heroes enough times that they were emblazoned in her brain. Each night as they made camp, Xena laid her bed roll a little farther away from the other two women. While Gabrielle pointed out constellations and told Aleta a related story, Xena tried to think about anything but the gods the other two women chattered about.

No matter how hard Xena tried to relieve her crowded mind, no matter how open the sky, no matter how calm the river they slept beside, Xena's thoughts always meandered their way back to Ares and his latest transgression, killing Ander. When Xena had revealed the news to the two women, Aleta cried in relief, feeling that justice had been served, that her sister's murder had been avenged. Gabrielle had the tact not to voice her opinion on the matter, but Xena could see the disapproval in the blonde's scowl. Xena was still trying to sort out how she felt about the whole matter. She worried that Ares' violence was escalating. It wasn't like him to take matters into his own hands and yet in the space of a month, he'd killed both Arkadios and Ander. Was she having this effect on him? Was the push and pull of their relationship weighing as heavily on him as it did her? Did she make him as murderous as he made her?

Xena brought Argo to a halt and swung her legs over the mare's back. The sun was moving lower on the western horizon. They needed to make camp soon. Xena had hoped that they'd make Chalcis by nightfall but she could tell that wasn't going to happen. They'd lost time at lunch when she and Gabrielle had bickered childishly over who'd misplaced the frying pan. In the end, they had to manufacture makeshift spits to cook their fish. Xena hadn't meant to go off on her friend but ever since the fight with Ares, she'd been on edge. Things felt so unsettled. To his credit, he hadn't shown up again, after he'd murdered Ander. Their day to meet had come and gone and she hadn't seen hide nor curly black hair of him. She'd cried that night. She wasn't proud of it, but she'd let it loose. Thankfully, her bedroll had been far enough away from the other women that they hadn't noticed her choking back her loneliness. How had everything gone so impossibly wrong?

"I'll hunt us up some grub if you can manage to get a fire going." Xena snarked as she grabbed a sling from her saddle bag. She hadn't meant it to sound as biting as it did, but somehow everything just came out bitchy, lately. She knew it was because she had gotten used to working out certain frustrations on a weekly basis. Xena didn't realize how much she'd needed that type of release until she'd started getting it on a regular basis.

Gabrielle took a deep breath! She wasn't about to have a repeat of breakfast so she bit her retort. What was she going to do with Xena? That whole mess with Ares and Ander had really done a number on the warrior. She'd been cranky and overly emotional since she'd come back from Styra with the news. Gabrielle wasn't exactly sure why Ares' actions had had such a devastating effect on her friend. It wasn't as if Xena thought he were incapable of murder! It was Ares, after all. No, something else was going on. Gabrielle looked back at Xena who was checking the latch that held her chakram. A horrific thought crossed Gabrielle's mind. What if it was something like what had happened with Ming T'ien? What if Xena had killed Ander and she'd lied to Gabrielle? Hadn't they come too far for that? Surely, Xena hadn't killed the man! And, if she had, she would tell Gabrielle the truth, wouldn't she? But Ares had certainly shown that held sway over Xena of late. What if he had prodded her she'd killed Ander? Xena had returned to his bed, what if Ander was the baptism back into his way of blood? Gabrielle didn't like that she was doubting her friend, but she didn't know what to make of Xena's current attitude problem, either. "We'll get the firewood and start making spits. Good luck with the hunt."

"Hunting is not about luck, Gabrielle." Xena barked and marched off into the woods.

Xena listened to the woods around her. She welcomed the distraction of the hunt. A task to keep her mind occupied if only for half an hour. The cooing of quail offered promise. Xena scanned the forest floor for small pebbles. The ground here, however, was soft and covered in brown pine needles. Xena reached out with her ears, closing her eyes. Running water nearby. Xena walked toward the sound. As she neared the water, dirt packed ground gave way to gravelly river rock. A clear brook hurried along slicking over slate grey rock. Xena followed the stream's gentle incline. She knew she'd find the waterfall before she turned the last corner of the canyon. It wasn't as high as she'd anticipated but it was fairly wide and created a broad pool of cool fresh water. Xena checked the position of the sun again. She wished she had the power to make Helios stop in his track around the world. But alas, she only held influence over Ares. The birds would be nesting soon. Xena examined the creek bed and picked up a handful of rocks that had been rounded into smooth balls. With a regretful look back at the darkening pool, Xena headed off after her prey. She returned to camp with three fat quail, just as Helios' chariot retired for the evening. Xena was pleased to see that not only had Gabrielle built a serviceable fire but she'd also found time to forage for some fresh greens to go with the poultry. She knew she owed her friend an apology. Maybe after dinner, she and Gabrielle could have a heart to heart.

AXAXAXAXAXAXAXAX

The fire burned low. Xena used the dying light to sharpen the edges of her sword. Gabrielle plopped down next to Xena and rested her head against her friend's strong bicep."You've been working that for an hour. You keep it up, you'll whittle it away." Gabrielle teased. Xena lifted the blade and looked down its length. Without a word, she tossed the sword onto her bedroll. "Wanna talk about it?" Gabrielle asked. Xena cut her eyes toward their young companion. "Ah, I see," Gabrielle said, "let's go for a walk, then, How's that?"

Xena nodded.

"Aleta, Xena and I will be back in a bit, just going for a little stroll. You'll be okay, won't you?" Gabrielle asked.

"Sure," the girl answered though it sounded a little uncertain to Xena.

Gabrielle set the pace as they walked leisurely down the cart path. "What's going on with you?"

"I'm sorry, I know I've been a bitch."

"Well, I wouldn't have said bitch," Gabrielle hedged.

Xena cocked her eyebrow.

"Okay, so you've been a bit bitchy. So, what gives?"

"I didn't do anything, Gabrielle. I just stood there and watched. I could've stopped him with a word. He killed Ander for me, because he thought it was what I wanted."

"Was it?" Gabrielle asked relieved that Xena hadn't done the deed herself.

"No. Yes. Maybe. That's just it, I don't know. I considered doing it myself. How can I be so pissed at him for doing something I contemplated?"

At least Xena still had a harness on her baser instincts. That truth gave Gabrielle hope. "Because you didn't do it! Xena, don't you see? That's the difference. Sure, you had the urge, but ultimately you knew it would have been murder and so you didn't do it."

"Then why did I let him do it?"

"I can't answer that for you, Xena."

The two walked along in companionable silence for a bit. The crescent moon offered scant light on the trail before them.

Finally, Gabrielle broke the calm. "You miss him."

"Yes. I don't want to, but I do."

"He didn't show up for his weekly visit this week. Does that bother you?"

"Yes. I don't know where we go from here. I don't know if there is anywhere to go. I feel like we are on the battlefield and we've reached a stalemate. I can't go back to where I was before and his contempt for humanity keeps him from growing in the way I need him to."

"I see. If he comes back are you going to keep sleeping with him?"

"My mind says no, my body says yes."

"Your heart?"

"I think my heart is already with him."

It stung but Gabrielle tried not to wince. But as any real friend would, Gabrielle championed Xena on. "Why don't you call him? Talk it out? Like you're talking to me? I hate to see you hurting. I hate that he does this to you. And, above all, I wish I could make you forget him but we both know that that is not going to happen. But Xena, if you don't talk to him, things are never going to get better."

"Talking doesn't help with him, Gabrielle. It's not like with you and me. We can agree to disagree. With me and Ares it's like as soon as I close my legs and open my mouth, all Tartarus breaks loose. Sex, we do that well. Talking, not so much."

"If you love him, you have to keep trying. What if I'd given up on you the first time we hit a roadblock?"

"I'd be a murdering harpy again!" Xena sighed.

"Doesn't he deserve the same effort that I've put into you?"

"Fuck, maybe you should have a talk with him!"

"That's not gonna work. He doesn't want to be good for me, Xena. It's you he wants to please."

"And he thinks killing Ander is the kind of thing that pleases me?"

"Didn't it? You said you didn't stop him." Gabrielle wasn't judging but she wasn't letting Xena off the hook for her part in it either.

"Yes, okay, it pleased me and it sickened me at the same time! Maybe I'm the one that's screwed up and not him!"

"Xena, I didn't mean. . . ."

"I know. I'm gonna go for a run. I'll be back later. You can make it back safely, can't you?" And in breath all of the bitchiness that she'd felt earlier came rushing back.

"Tell him I said, hello," Gabrielle smirked and headed back to camp.

Xena shook her head. Despite what Gabrielle thought, she had no intention of calling Ares. She wasn't about to give him the satisfaction of calling his name. No. He was going to have to come to her, Xena thought as she picked up her pace and headed for the waterfall.

AXAXAXAXAXAXAX

Xena hadn't been in the pool long before she felt him move in behind her. His hard, naked thighs pressed hotly against the backs of her own as he wrapped his arms around her belly. She hadn't realized how cold the water had been until she felt the divine heat of him. "You look lonely, Xena," he whispered in her ear before he kissed along the side of her neck down to her shoulder.

"Areeesss,' Xena growled.

"Do you really want me to stop? You're all knotted up. I could help you release some of that tension."

"Areesss," she cried again but leaned back into him. She felt his hand move down into the water in front of her. Her body turned to clay in his masterful hands. Her thighs parted, letting him pet where he wanted.

"So slick for me, even in this water, I can feel your oily wetness, Xena."

"Areeees," she panted, it was the only word she knew.

"This one's for you, Baby, just for you." The water lapped at her breasts while he worked his hot fingers over her. He continued his lingual assault on her ear, neck, and shoulders while his left hand held her tenderly against him. Xena felt her knees start to buckle as she came undone in his arms. "I love you," he whispered with a parting kiss, leaving Xena breathless and boneless in the embrace of the water.

"I love you too," Xena muttered under her breath before she let herself sink fully into the dark water.