From Chapter 10: When Charles returned, Elsie had him open the package, explaining to his astounded eyes, "I ordered these from that shop in Argyll I am on the mailing list for. I couldn't resist." She was nibbling that lip again.
'These' were a pair of Tartan print shorts that delivered the style and show that Charles Carson always insisted upon, and celebrated his devotion to his Scottish lass.
"Now, what say we figure out a pose for you, Mr. Carson?"
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Whilst Elsie made a salad and reheated leftovers for their supper, Charles cleaned up his bicycle so that it gleamed and sparkled. Over their simple yet tasty meal later, the Carsons discussed Charles' options. Only, afterward - once the dishes were washed and put away - none of those options worked well enough in Elsie's opinion as they all had in theory. She suggested he change into the new shorts so she'd know for certain. He thought she was kidding; in fact she was quite serious. Reluctantly, Charles went inside, changed and returned to the garden wearing only his new Tartan print shorts. Elsie had used the time to pour two glasses of sherry for them.
Again, she studied her handsome husband from all different angles standing beside or sitting upon his bicycle. "Charlie, it's just not working," she sighed.
"Well what do we do?" he was clearly nervous as he rubbed his hands together.
"We'll get there in the end. I think the problem is the bicycle and maybe we need to abandon that idea altogether. How about posing with that silly stuffed trout of yours instead? The one that's been around as long as I've known you."
"Funny, no. Another reason I didn't particularly like the bicycle - and it's true for the trout as well - neither says 'us.' Ultimately, I'm doing this for you, and I'd like to pose with something that is synonymous with us."
He could be so thoughtful, her man. Elsie picked up her sherry glass and leaned back in her chair, considering other options for him. "Well, how about a sherry glass?"
Disappointedly, his first reaction was that she was teasing him. But as he looked over at his wife, she was holding her sherry glass out to him in a toast; she was being genuine.
Clinking their glasses, Charles cleared his throat and mumbled, "Definitely not enough for me to hide behind. A wine bottle, perhaps?"
By her silence, it appeared that Elsie was considering that option. "Maybe if it's a magnum." When he caught onto what she was implying, Charles' chin dropped and Elsie burst into laughter, with her husband quickly following suit. Oh, Elsie!
Suddenly, Charles began waving his hands crazily around his head and brushing his arms, "Elsie, the mosquitos are coming. I need to go inside."
The Carsons hustled into their cottage, shut the kitchen door and shortly thereafter made their way into the parlour with Charles heading over to the staircase to slip into his pyjamas upstairs. He was on about the fourth step when Elsie shouted for him to stop. He did so. When she asked him to turn around and head back down, he started to do that as well, though he he wasn't following why exactly. Only she commanded that he stop again, ever before he'd descended one step. Elsie gestured for him to raise his knee that was closest to her. "Charlie, I think we've got it. You want modesty and something that says us." She pointed at her confused husband, "There, you have both."
On Friday morning at the Abbey, with his loving wife nearby lending her emotional support, Charles Carson described to the art director, Lady Rose and the photographer what they'd concluded last night at home. Charles would be photographed heading "down" the Servants' stairs, his left foot solidly on a tread, his right leg closest to the camera raised so that his thigh shielded "Elsie's treasures" behind it. It was one of the creative team's favourite shots.
Later that morning, Charles gathered with more than a dozen men of Downton, all in conventional plain white boxers or briefs for the group shot on Downton's cricket pitch. The best shot of the lot was deemed to be the one where Charles, like a few of the others, held a strategically placed bat up - to hide Lord Grantham's shorts.
The End
But wait, here's the calendar lineup:
January - Atticus Aldridge: The Big Apple
February - Bertie Pelham: Flirty Bertie
March - Sergeant Willis and Timothy Drew: First Responders
April - Andrew Parker and Albert Mason: Salt of the Earth
May - Robert Crawley: The Grantham Arms
June - Thomas Barrow and James Kent: Pride
July - John Bates, Joseph Molesley and Sepitmus Spratt: Loyalty
August - Charles Carson: Don't Stare Downstairs
September - Tom Branson and Henry Talbot: Gearheads
October - The Men of Downton
November - Anthony Strallan, Evelyn Napier, Charles Blake and Tony Gillingham: The Suitors
December - Dr. Clarkson and Reverend Travis: Body and Soul
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A/N: Hope you enjoyed this little fic and know I welcome your reviews including thoughts on what poses/ props were used for each of the shots! Above all, who wants to place an order?! Regrets that such a calendar is not part of the upcoming movie promotions - that I am aware of!