Chapter 9

"Bellamy," Clarke whispered. Suddenly he was gone. Again. She wondered if they would ever be together. It seemed like the universe was determined to not let that happen. Like when Poseidon wouldn't let Odysseus return home to Penelope.

"Bellamy would love that," she thought. "He would love to think of himself as a Greek hero."
Perhaps it wasn't as far as a leap as either of them thought.

She picked herself up from the floor. Why was she still in her mindspace? Why didn't she go home?

There was a red door at the end of the hallway. She ran to it. It wouldn't unlock. Why wouldn't it unlock?

Clarke fell to the floor defeated. Her blonde hair fell into her ocean eyes. A single tear pricked her cheek as it fell to the floor. "Boohoo." Josephine appeared suddenly. Apparently, they weren't finished yet. "Isn't that what you said to me? Boohoo?"

"I can't let you live Clarke. I'm too awesome. I've survived centuries. I can survive this."

Josephine bent down to the floor caressed Clarke's face, as is for a moment she cared about the girl she shared a body with. She rested her cheek to Clarke's face and said in a soft voice, "Besides, I'm not sure you deserve to live Clarke. But why let me judge? Why don't we ask them."

Suddenly all the ghosts from Clarke's past lined up to haunt her. Like a living nightmare.

Maya stepped forward first, surrounded by the people from Mount Weather. "Come on Wanheda. Let's see the girl who bore it all. Was it worth it? Was my life worth it?"

Clarke got up to plead with her but Maya stepped back as the next person stepped forward.

Lexa.

Clarke couldn't contain her tears. "You were my weakness Clarke. You made me weak. You killed me."

"Lexa I didn't…" Clarke trailed off as the ghosts backed her into a corner. Then everyone was there. Wells, Charlotte, Finn, Jaha, grounders, her father.

Their words filled the air making it feel heavy. Sucking the oxygen right out of the sky. Clarke struggled to breathe with the weight of your choices coming down around her.

She was suffocating. She was dying. But, this wasn't a new feeling really. Didn't she feel she was suffocating every day since she left for the ground. Ever since they took her childhood. Ever since they made her make the impossible choices. Ever since they gave her the burden of caring for an entire people at only 17.

"No," she said quietly at first. Suddenly everything she had been holding came flying out. Like a tidal wave flooding the shore. There was no turning back now. "NO," she screamed standing.

"I will not be drowned be the likes of you. I survived. I am a survivor. Priamfaya runs through my veins and I will not allowed myself to be burned any longer."

"I did what I had to do to survive. I have regrets. I made mistakes. But I don't deserve death. I deserve life. Life with Madi and with…"

Simply stating it out loud, that she deserved to live, set a fire in her heart. She ran to the door, ignoring the ghosts, and pulled the red handle.

The door opened and she looked out to her future… and walked forward.

End of Chapter 9