The street lights on campus had just turned on as Midoriya and Mineta shambled their way back into the dormitories. Sam & Max had driven them home and as per the usual response whenever someone sets foot into their high speed hellwagon they were left wobbly wrecks upon peeling themselves off the leather upholstery. It was a miracle they didn't lose their lunch during the trip, though they left a few shades greener than when they got in.

Regardless, their return was heralded by stares of pity and mild amusement.

"Wow, you two look like crap," Sero commented nearby, smirking as he lowers his magazine.

"Stow it, sticky," Mineta grumbled bitterly. "What the hell, guys! None of you even noticed I got abducted!" he loudly accused.

"Oh, we noticed," Mina quipped nonchalantly. "But did you honestly expect us to get involved with the Freelance police?"

"How cruel!?" he cried, tears streaming down his face. "I was a true blue hero today, dammit! Where's my respect!"

"You'll get your respect when you stop trying to spy on us every time in the locker rooms!" Kyouka snapped.

Midoriya sighed heavily, feeling a migraine come on. "Guys, can we not do this now. It's been a long day."

"I'll say," Kirishima whistled. "What happened to you guys?"

"What? You're telling me you didn't watch the news?" asked Mineta.

"Whoa, that was you guys?" Kaminari poked his head out from the kitchen. "Holy crap! You guys tore up like half the friggin city! Made Kamino Ward look like Sunday at the beach. Insurance agencies have been going bonkers calculating all that damage. You guys tryna bankrupt em' or something?"

"I-it wasn't our fault though!" Midoriya defended. "Sam & Max did most of it!"

"Yeah, we just stuck around for the butt kicking and mental trauma," said Mineta.

Kaminari shook his head. "Sheesh, those guys are insane."

"That's an understatement." Midoriya rubbed the bridge of his nose. "Look, we'll tell you all about it later. I just really need to decompress right now."

"You do whatever you want, I'm going to bed." Mineta grumbled something unintelligible beneath his breath as he ascended to the boy's hall.

"Man, I need a hot bath," Midoriya sighed and casually removed his gun harness. He then absently tossed it onto the coffee table, where the revolver that had been holstered suddenly discharged with a thundering crack, causing damn near everyone in the room to nearly jump out of their skin in fright and leaving a gaping hole in the drywall.

"Aaaaaaaah!" A scream rang from above. Satou came rushing down from the stairway like a man possessed, eyes stained with flowing tears of utter sorrow. In his hands was a cake that had a massive exit wound in it, courtesy of a stray .357 magnum bullet. "Whyyyyyy?!" He grieved.

Every pair of eyes in the room, each one as wide as saucers, turned to face Midoriya with a look of utter flabbergast plastered on their face.

Midoriya was justifiably red as a tomato as he chuckled nervously, scratching the back of his neck. "Heh heh, I, er... Guess I forgot to set the safety on my gun."

"Why do you have a gun!?" Iida screamed, still clutching his chair in fright.

"Hatsume made it for me!" Midoriya cried back.

"Why did she make you a gun!?"

"WHO THE FUCK IS SCREAMING AT NIGHT!? AND WHY IS THERE A FUCKING HOLE IN MY ROOM!"

It took some time to calm everyone down.

Thankfully no one had been seriously injured because of Midoriya's negligent discharge (unless you count Satou's cake, then yes, it was a terrible casualty). Cementoss would fix the drywall in the morning, so all was well and good (for My Hero Academia standards are least).

Meanwhile, Midoriya finally got that bath he wanted.

The hot water felt like heaven upon his aching muscles, and when he finally got out he took no time in throwing himself onto his officially licensed All Might brand bed, snuggling in his officially licensed All Might brand blanket and pillow set while wearing his officially licensed All Might brand pajamas.

Letting out a content breath, he began reflecting on his wild day.

The events of the day kept replaying in his head, and even in a world of superheroes and supervillains it was hard to believe that all of the insanity he'd experienced had happened in less than the span of six hours. Twelve if he counted the school day.

Americans were so different from what he had been told. He silently wondered if Pony from class 1-B knew about them, then gulped at the thought that she might also like him the same way every other girl he knew did.

The thought of North America being a hostile land of insane gun toting psychopaths hopped up on cheeseburgers and twinkies mixed with the thought of his disproportionately large polyamorous relationship was starting to make his brain cells short circuit.

Luckily he was jolted from his thoughts by the familiar ringing of his cellphone.

According to the caller id his mother was calling him.

"Hmm?" Midoriya sat up, his eyebrow raised. He picked up the phone and answered the call. "Hello? Mom?"

Almost instantly he was assaulted with near incoherent babbling as the poor woman on the other end of the line went off on him, sounding like a sobbing wreck that could barely string together a simple sentence.

"Wah! Wah, wah, waaaaaaaaaaah! Wah, wah, wah!"

"Mom! Calm down!" Midoriya shouted. "What's wrong? Why are you crying?"

"Wah? Wah, wah, wah!"

"What? N-no! Wait, how did you learn about that?!"

"Wah, wah, wah. Wah, wah, wah."

"Nejire called you earlier today?... She called you mom? She said she can't wait to give you grandchildren? Well, that does sound like her... Wait! It's not what you thi- Hold on... Yaoyorozu also called you? She called you mother-in-law?... She said she wouldn't mind if she took my last name instead of the other way around? Well, that's really sweet- T-that's not the point! Look, mom. It's just a vision of the future. I mean, I-I... Look, I'll call you back. I promise. Good night."

"Wa-"

Midoriya instantly hung up on his mom before the waterworks started again. Good god, he's going to have one hell of a time trying to properly explain all of this to his mom. He wouldn't be surprised if he started crying too.

Feeling the last of his energy leaving his body he quickly slid back into his bed, turned the lights off and shut his eyes, patiently awaiting for the gentle hands of sleep to take him for the night. He barely got in two breaths before he snapped his eyes open again, greeting the darkness with a nagging sensation in his head.

"I should probably unload the revolver before sleeping..."

Sitting up he turned over to his nightstand and turned the lights back on, only to be taken aback by what, or rather who, had suddenly shown up in his room.

To his bewilderment, Uraraka, Tsuyu, Kyouka, Tooru, Yaoyorozu, Ashido, Nejire, Itsuka, Hatsume and Pony (well, that answers one question) were all in his room. Ibara was the only one absent, possibly because she wouldn't dare debase herself with such debauchery. They were all dressed in their nightwear, and he could feel his cheeks flare up at sight of them all.

The girls all audibly gulped, exchanging nervous glances with each other as they all stood stock still as a statue. They remained that way for a moment, blushing uncontrollably as they came to realize they'd become entangled with a blatant multileveled plot to snuggle with the object of their affection, only to run into the competition at the worst of times. Fortunately for them, Midoriya had chosen to believe he was hallucinating the whole thing.

"I must be more tired than I thought. I'm starting to see things..." He turned off the lights and was basked in darkness once more. "When I turn on the lights, they'll be gone." With a flick of a switch the light came on once more and he breathed a sigh of relief as he was greeted with an empty room. "Phew, I thought I was going crazy for a moment there."

He turned the lights off for good, passing out the instant his head hit the pillow and forgetting all about the revolver. He'll deal with it tomorrow, hopefully when reality reorients itself for him after having to put up with Sam & Max.

He slept soundly that night, unaware of the fact that his adventure has only just begun...

Meanwhile...

The girls all clung to the outside of the dormitory wall that was Midoriya's room, letting out a collective sigh of relief as they narrowly escaped having to explain their dubious presence to the boy of their dreams. The embarrassment of it all would've been enough to kill these hardened heroines.

Ashido had melted a set of holes onto the building and was using it as a makeshift ladder to hang onto.

Tsuyu was stuck to the wall, having secreted a unique viscous mucus from her skin to stick herself to it.

Uraraka had used her quirk to float nearby. The sensation was starting to make her sick but her endurance training had made her a bit more resilient to the nature of her own abilities.

Hatsume was floating next to Nejire, both of whom were lifted off the ground by support tech and quirk respectively.

Yaoyorozu had quickly formed an extra strength rope ladder and was now hanging off the edge of Midoriya's room window along with Kyoka, Tooru, Itsuka and Pony.

Together they made for an odd sight.

"Sooooo..." Ashido began awkwardly. "Wonderful night we're having."

Everyone nodded along.

"...I had dibs, kero," Tsuyu croaked.

"You most certainly did not!" Kyouka rebuked.

"Oh, like you could say the same," Uraraka huffed.

"Well, so much for snuggle time..." Nejire mumbled wistfully.

"Still, what are the odds that we'd all try to sneak into his room in the same night," said Hatsume.

"I didn't even know you liked him!" replied Tooru.

"Course I do. He's a gentleman. A real charmer. He Makes me feel special, wanted." Hatsume then smiled mischievously. "And you can practically grind meat on those abs..."

"I still can't believe we all like him," said Itsuka, sounding rather sheepish.

"I can!" Pony replied optimistically in broken japanese.

"I mean, it's like Hatsume says..." Yaoyorozu blushed deeply, breaking out into a cold sweat. "He's sweet on us. A-and I like him for more than his body, of course. But you can't deny he's very... *gulp* statuesque."

"Yeah. Makes you wonder if anyone else likes him..." Kyouka thought aloud. As if on cue, the sound of someone loudly clearing their throat turned their attention to the rather irate individual below them.

"AHEM!" Ibara harrumphed. She looked crossed. Though her features were usually sharp and resolute it was clear as day from her twitching brow and violently convulsing vines that she could barely contain her anger at her future sister-wives (not that she had already accepted such an inevitability. No sirree). "Just what in the name of all that is holy do you think you're doing?!"

"Er... You know, we're just hanging around. Kero," said Tsuyu. All eyes turned to her in an instant. The girls just couldn't believe that she cracked the easiest joke in all of existence with such leisure. Then, someone like Tsuyu could say it unironically.

Ibara was shaking with fury. "How dare you harlots seek to defile innocent Midoriya's chastity!"

"Oh come on, we weren't going to do anything that bad. Some skin to skin contact here, maybe a peck on the cheek there while he's asleep. Nothing too serious. I mean, maybe Yaoyorozu wanted to do something to him but hey, that's on her," Hatsume replied flippantly. "You know how rich folks are."

"I beg your pardon?!" Yaoyorozu snapped indignantly.

The resulting conversation was tragically cut short as Ibara unleashed the might of God and nature by dragging them all down with her vines and giving them a long zealous lecture about chaste conduct.

Some bible throwing may have been involved.

Those things hurt.

...A lot

Aizawa's morning routine started out like anyone else's.

He woke up, yawned, smacked his lips, scratched himself, walked over to the window and proceeded to scream at the top of his lungs when he saw the massive concrete monstrosity that had shown up overnight outside the dormitories.

"WHAT THE F-" He cut his curse short and darted out onto the campus with blazing speeds, becoming absolutely speechless at what he was witnessing with his groggy eyes.

It was Sam & Max's half condemned poorly maintained office building, and it looked like it had been ripped straight out from its very foundations and messily planted onto Yuuei's campus grounds like an infant had tried and failed to squeeze a square peg into a round hole.

"Howdy doo, Aizawa!" Sam called from the window, tuning a banjo in his hands. "Told ya we'd be back. We just had to bring the office with us. It'll be easier to help with the investigation without having to drive across the pacific ocean every time. Guess we'll be neighbors for a while,eh? Say, how about a song to celebrate the occasion?" Sam opened his mouth and began to sing a little ditty as he played his banjo.

"Ooooooooooh!~"

Aizawa collapsed onto his knees and began staring unblinkingly into the face of cruel eternity as he bemoaned his life. It was as if he was living out an episode of the Twilight Zone.

"Noooooooooo!" He cried out in despair. "Nooooooooooo! Noooooooooo!" He began breaking down into sobs, keeling over onto the ground and curling into fetal position as he wept for mercy.

"Nooooooooooo!"

"Nooooooooooo!"

He cried to whatever God would listen, but all he received in return...

...was silence.

Sam & Max: Mayhem in Musutafu City!

Season 1 End

A/N: Alright y'all. That's the end of the season 1. But stick around, this story ain't over yet.