✥ Hiraeth ➾ the concept of longing for home or a particular time, era, or person of significance

SUMMARY

It was a terrible idea to date someone who'd been in love with someone else for years, even if it was fake...

Carina Lennox was a great friend- it was something she prided herself on. She'd miraculously managed to become the only girl to closely befriend all the Marauders, and somehow still retained her title 'Gryffindor Angel'. Everyone loved her- at least everyone worth while. But what was she supposed to say when one of her closest friends asked her to be his fake girlfriend in order to catch the eye of the girl he's been in love with for years?

It all started as a harmless last-ditch scheme to get Lily's attention, but he never anticipated there was more to Carina than he'd ever tried to understand...

James Potter was desperate. It was already their seventh year, and he still couldn't get Lily to give him the time of day. Carina was his last hope to catch her attention, and she also happened to be one of his closest and dearest friends. If she simply agreed to help him out, what's the worst that could happen?

CHAPTER ONE: RISKY PROPOSALS

"Oh come on, you bores! It's a Saturday morning, you can't possibly be working!"

"Unlike some people, Remus and I actually care about finishing our assignments," Carina rolled her eyes at Sirius.

To be fair, they weren't actually doing schoolwork; they were discussing the theory of time travel and the idea of a multiverse. It was quite fascinating, and Remus was one of the few people with whom she could have random intellectual conversations. She'd come to breakfast early as always, and the Great Hall was only ever sparsely occupied this early on the weekends. Luckily Remus had been there to keep her company.

"Why are you up this early anyway, Sirius?" Remus asked, genuinely baffled. "You're never out of bed before 10 o'clock on the weekends!"

"I know," he grumbled, as if a dark cloud had settled itself over his head. "Prongs was practically leaping around the dorms this morning, talking about how he wanted to get a glimpse of Lily at the lake."

Carina couldn't help the chuckle that escaped her lips. "Oh you poor baby," she teased. "Did someone not get his beauty sleep?"

"Oye," Sirius defensively brandished a banana at her. "I'll have you know it takes a routine to look as good as I do."

"Oh really, and that's why you're all out gallivanting around the castle most nights?" Carina raised an eyebrow knowingly.

"Erm... about that," Remus said sheepishly.

"Oh please, Remus. I know you're out there right alongside them."

"You've known and you haven't told anyone?" Sirius asked, taking a seat across from her, a newfound respect shining in his eyes.

"I've known you boys for 7 years, you're not nearly as discreet as you like to think."

"But you're a prefect," Remus pointed out.

"So were you," she countered. "Besides, James is head boy and that hardly stops him from participating in your shenanigans."

"Hey, their shenanigans," Remus argued. "I only show up to make sure no one dies."

"See, that's precisely why I don't tell anyone. You're hardly harming someone, they're just pranks," she shrugged.

"Merlin," Sirius whispered looking at her in awe. "To think, all these years we could've had a prefect safeguard our get aways."

"I wouldn't go that far," Carina chuckled

Their light laughs faded as they heard stomping footsteps headed towards the Great Hall, which reverberated in the uncommonly quiet room this morning.

"For Merlin's sake, Potter! Leave me alone," Lily fumed, marching straight down the Gryffindor table.

"Evans I'm telling you, us meeting out there was simply coincidence! Call it fate, if you will!" James called out cockily after her.

Lily slowed as she came upon Carina, giving her a regretful smile when she noticed she was sitting with Remus and Sirius. Lily kept walking further down the table until she dropped herself into a seat next to Alice. Carina didn't blame her. James would come sit with them since Remus and Sirius were already there, and Lily did not have the patience for one more second of the Potter show right now.

"She hates me," James groaned quietly, dropping into the empty seat beside Sirius once Lily was out of earshot.

No one bothered to try and tell him otherwise, knowing false hope would not help him now. After all, it had been seven bloody years of his pining after the vibrant redhead. And even their year of collaborating as Heads had not warmed her up to the outgoing Marauder.

"Rough morning?" Carina asked sympathetically, sliding a plate of treacle tarts his way.

"I just wanted to catch a glimpse of her!" He grumbled. "It's not my fault the twerp she was meeting spotted me and bolted." He bit into a tart angrily only to moan in joy. "Argh, Carina you're a godsend."

"Maybe loosen up on the early morning stalking, yeah mate?" Remus suggested with a grin.

"I wasn't stalking!" James insisted indignantly. "This castle's only so big, and it's not like she reserved the lakeside!"

"Prongs, you were talking about looking for her all morning." Sirius said dryly, still bitter about being woken.

"Alright, fine!" He huffed petulantly. "But come on guys, I've tried everything," he groaned desperately.

"Did you try giving her some space?" Carina suggesting with twinkling eyes. "Distance makes the heart grow fonder."

"Are you sure you don't belong in Ravenclaw?" Sirius eyed her up and down.

"And where would you lot be if I was?"

"Probably the bottom of the Black Lake," Remus reminded them pointedly.

Carina had been there for the boys a time or two over the years. It all started on one fateful morning back in second year when she'd woken much earlier than usual, sneaking down to the common room before the sun could even rise. She was simply reading at the time and before she knew it, the sun had broken free over the horizon. It was around then that James, Sirius, and Peter came stumbling down the stairs.

"We need to go now!" Sirius insisted.

"But we'll get caught for sure," Peter said anxiously.

The boys argued between themselves, completely missing Carina who was still curled up in a sofa by the fireplace.

"Where exactly do you need to go so early, and will it be losing us house points?" She asked from her perch.

They boys' eyes flew to her, all of them freezing. They'd been caught in the act. She was surprised to see Remus missing from their group; they were nearly always together. Except for when he was studying, usually with Carina herself or Lily. They'd become friends early on in first year, recognizing the academic in each other. She knew Peter distantly from the few times he'd simply tagged along with his friend on their study sessions. But James and Sirius were practically strangers to her; she definitely knew of them, but they never ran in the same circles and she couldn't remember a single time that they'd actually had a conversation.

"Look Lennox," Sirius whispered urgently. "You can't try and tell on us, we need to go see Remus."

"Remus?" Her ears perked up. "What's wrong with Remus?"

"He's in the hospital wing," James said, his eyes flickering between the boys hesitantly. "He got really sick last night."

"Oh no!" She cried, genuinely concerned. "Why can't you go see him?"

"Because second years are not supposed to be roaming the castle this early, Madam Pomfrey would have our heads," Sirius gritted his teeth in annoyance.

Carina chewed on her bottom lip for a minute, considering the concerned and antsy boys in front of her.

"How important is it that you see him immediately? Can't it wait a few hours? He might be asleep anyway."

They boys shared a knowing look once again, and Carina had the distinct feeling that she was missing something. "We need to go now," Sirius insisted.

"Look Lennox, you don't have to do anything but pretend you didn't see us, and we'll be on our way." James flashed her a pleading look.

"Now hold on," Carina stopped them, finally rising out of her chair. "Which one of you is best at defense?"

James and Sirius glanced at each other before James nodded to Sirius. "I guess that'd be me," Sirius said stepping forward.

"Okay," she said, pushing her wand into his hand. "Hex me."

"What?" He balked. "Are you mad?"

"Keep up, Black. We learned the hex that makes your opponent sick this week. You cast it on me, and voila! You three have an excuse to escort me down to the hospital wing."

"That's brilliant," Sirius praised in shock.

"Yeah, but we can cast it on one of us," James insisted. "Seriously, Lennox, we're not about to hurt you."

"No," she insisted. "Everyone knows you four are attached at the hip, if you show up with one of you sick, they'll assume you did it to each other to see Remus and check your wands."

"Is that why you trusted me with your wand?" Sirius asked slowly.

Letting someone else use your wand in the wizarding world was a deep sign of trust, and it was not commonly done. It amazed Sirius even more that he hadn't felt any resistance from her wand when he'd closed his fingers around it. It was quite rare for magic to be as compatible among two people.

"Yes," she waved her hand to gesture them to get on with it. "Now if you want to get to Remus, I suggest you hex me."

The boys all hesitantly glanced at each other. Sirius looked at her apologetically as he held up her wand to her stomach. "Sorry about this, Lennox."

The swell of pain in her abdomen was almost unbearable for her. In that moment Carina wondered if she should've asked for the worst Defense student because Sirius' hex was definitely potent. But she was scared that they'd bollix the spell and do something much worse than what it was intended for. When she managed to collect herself, taking deep breaths against gritted teeth, she looked up to see all three boys studying her in concern.

"Come on then," James said regretfully, kneeling in front of her, wordlessly telling her to get on his back.

She climbed on haphazardly and they rushed to the Hospital Wing, no longer faking the concern they felt for the girl. By the time they got there, Carina was pretty out of it, sweating from the pain. They dropped her in Madam Pomfrey's diligent hands, using the excuse to stay and visit Remus, who was in fact awake.

When she woke up a few hours later, the three were gathered at her bedside once again. She saw Remus a few beds away, and he looked very rough for wear. His healing wounds and pale face told her a very different story from what the boys had indicated, but she didn't ask. They would tell her if they wanted to. They merely thanked her for what she'd done.

But ever since then, she found all four boys inadvertently infiltrating her life. She'd always been friends with Remus, but now Peter felt more comfortable asking for her help or talking to her about his insecurities. Sirius was always a cocky boy, but even he seemed to view Carina as his personal moral compass. She was relaxed enough that she didn't get on their case, and respected their privacy and even some of their shenanigans, but she was genuine and kind enough that Sirius felt he could trust her advice. And let's face it, every boy needed that one girl friend who could give him a rational insiders perspective on women. James was an interesting one. He wasn't like Remus, he was too cocky and flirtatious for that. He wasn't quite like Sirius either, as he trusted his own moral compass and was completely head over heels for Lily. If Carina had to put a label on it, he almost felt like a brother. Always protective, always teasing her, but appreciative just the same.

"Carina!" Lily's voice snapped the young woman out of her memories. "You want to join us by the lake?"

"Sure," she smiled, collecting her stuff and heading over to join Lily and Alice. "See you boys later," she said affectionately.

"We see how it is, you little traitor," James scowled. "You better have a scoop for me when you get back."

"You wish, Potter," she called out, laughing as she walked away.

~o~o~o~

"Good lord, Carina!" Lily exclaimed, dropping to the soft grass at the lakeside. "What in the world do you see in that boy?"

"James?" Carina asked in amusement.

"Yeah! He's an arrogant, cocky, annoying little toe-rag!"

"Not so little anymore," Alice reminded her with a smirk.

"He's really not that bad once you really get to know him," Carina defended fondly. "The arrogance and jokester part of him are just a way to make his friends laugh."

"He's so immature! He just had to go ruin my morning!" Lily whined.

"Oh yeah, what happened with that anyway?" Carina asked. "James said a boy you were meeting ran off when he saw him. Not going to lie though, Lily- If any boy runs at the sight of James, you deserve much better than him."

"She was trying to get with Diggory," Alice said with a shit-eating smirk.

"Diggory ran off at the sight of James?" Carina almost spewed out the water she'd just drank from her bottle. She had a hard time believing that; Diggory was almost as prideful as any of the Marauders, if not more so.

"Of course not!" Lily crossed her arms in annoyance at the memory. "I was meeting Davies to see if he knew anything about Diggory's interest, with them being close friends and all."

"And...?" Alice prompted.

"And nothing!" Lily threw her hands up in frustration. "Potter got in the way!"

Carina and Alice chuckled lightly at Lily's frustration. She'd tried to date a few boys over the last few years, but none of them seem to meet her incredibly high expectations. Though Carina could see Diggory being her type; smooth, polished, suave.

"I swear," Lily continued angrily. "Sometimes I wish I'd been sorted into a different house so that he wouldn't have noticed me."

"You don't mean that," Alice said hesitantly.

"I do!" She insisted. "I've simply had enough of his constant attention, I can't even recall how much time I've wasted simply telling him off!"

Carina grimaced for her friend. Poor James.

"I know you think he's just being arrogant, Lils. But the boy really does like you quite a lot."

"Unlikely," she scoffed. "It's probably just his ego because I keep saying no."

"I can see why you would think that, I do," Carina insisted, demanding Lily's attention. "But I've known that boy for years, like really known him. He cares about you so incredibly much."

"Come on Carina, you're supposed to be on my side here," Lily deflated at her words.

"I am," she assured. "You know I support your decisions. If you choose not to date him, I'll back you up- it's your choice. But he's also not the complete jerk you're painting him to be and I can't just sit by and watch you say that about my friend."

Lily's anger seeped out of her at Carina's rational words. She knew she was right, after all Lily herself was juggling the precarious job of defending Severus Snape to all her other friends for years. Carina didn't enjoy being in the middle of all her friends, but she was always that person who could never fully take someone's side because she always knew the other side of the story. Perks of being approachable, she guessed, but it was a right pain in the arse sometimes.

"Are you sure a part of you isn't endeared by James?" Alice asked shyly.

"How do you figure?" Lily asked dryly.

"I mean he has girls always chasing him, but the only one he's ever bothered to chase is you. You've got to admit, it's a little romantic," Alice pointed out.

"No," Lily said carefully, her voice devoid of anger or frustration. "I think we're growing at different paces, and I just think I need to find myself before I try and commit myself to another person. James Potter at that! We're hardly alike."

"Opposites attract!" Alice pointed out.

"Are you sure part of you wouldn't be put off if James just woke up one day and all his interest in you was gone? And he just stopped with everything he'd been doing? All the attention? All the cute stunts?" Carina asked pointedly.

Lily hesitated for a brief second, but that moment sent a quirk to Carina's lips. She had her there.

"No, I wouldn't," Lily insisted stubbornly. "I would be relieved if anything."

They decided to drop the matter, since it seemed like they were talking in circles anyway. There was a soft shift in the leaves in the tree behind them and Carina glanced over to see one of the branches swaying lightly. Strange... there's no breeze.

~o~o~o~

It was almost noon when Carina left the girls to head back up to Gryffindor tower. They wanted to relax in the early spring sun for a little longer, but Carina wanted to delve back into a book she'd been reading all week but hadn't had enough time for. She was passing through the courtyard, her eyes closing in contentment at the cool breeze that'd picked up through the Scottish mountains. She was entirely caught off guard when a firm grip took a hold of her arm and snatched her into an empty corridor.

A sharp gasp escaped her lips when she was pulled over to face the floating head of the one and only James Potter.

"Holy mother of Merlin, James!" She whisper-yelled, shoving him in the chest. Or she hoped it was his chest, but she couldn't quite tell since he was bloody invisible! "I swear you and that bloody cloak are going to give me a heart attack one day."

"Sorry," he grinned sheepishly, running his hand through his hair in what she'd learned was not a cocky move but in fact, a nervous habit.

"Is there a reason you're accosting me in abandoned corridors instead of waiting until I returned to the common room?" She asked teasingly, crossing her arms.

"I heard what Lily said," James said seriously, his expression looking as dim as she'd ever seen it.

"You were hiding behind the tree." Carina realized, the puzzle pieces finally falling into place.

James nodded wordlessly. He looked up at her, studying her critically for a moment, before he pulled her over to sit on one of the open window sills.

"Carina, my shining star!"

"James, my trusty steed," Carina replied, smiling at his theatrics.

Her response gave him pause though. Steed? Stag? Close enough, except for the slight matter that the Marauders had never told Carina about Moony and his Animagi. It wasn't that they didn't trust her, but they'd all just assumed it was a matter that would stay between them; after all it was mainly Moony's secret.

"How much do you love me?" James asked with a puppy-like grin.

"Depends on what you want from me," she said cautiously. "But I have a feeling not at all today."

"Be my fake girlfriend," James blurted out ineloquently.

Carina merely raised an eyebrow. "Oh sure and maybe let's get fake married while we're at it, that'll solve so many life issues."

"I'm serious." James insisted.

"Why on earth would you want a fake girlfriend? Me at that?" Carina asked, completely baffled.

"Look it's been seven years, and Lily still can't see past the arrogant prat she envisions whenever she looks at me," James said, genuinely hurt. "And I heard you all by the lake. You and Alice seem to think if I suddenly stop liking her, she'd miss me."

"So pretend like you've stopped," Carina said. "There's no need to fake date someone, that's just incredibly messy!"

"We only have like 3 months left until we graduate, Carina! We don't have enough time for Lily to realize I've stopped pursuing her, and then realize she doesn't like that, and then work up the guts to do something about it!"

"Whereas your plan...?"

"Okay," he said excitedly, turning to face her completely. "We fake date, and I focus all my cuter attentions on you. Hopefully Lily gets jealous. And on the side, I have the excuse to talk to her normally and show her the real me because it's not as if I'd be trying to get over her since I already have you! Then hopefully getting to know the real me, which let's admit it- I'm great, on top of seeing me with another girl will push her to react sooner!"

Carina studied James, half expecting him to jump up and shout 'jokes on you!'

"Alright, I see your point," she admitted. "So find another girl. Why me? I'm one of Lily's closest friends!"

"That's precisely why!" James insisted. "One, I don't trust any other girl with something this important. You're the only one I would ask for something as crazy as this."

"Well thanks," she huffed, not knowing whether she should feel insulted or flattered.

"But also," he plowed on. "Me dating any other girl after years of chasing Lily just isn't believable! But you're one of my best friends, and the only girl one at that! It makes much more sense that'd I'd fall for you despite Lily!"

Carina continued to stare at James incredulously. "You realize this plan is absolutely mad, right?"

"Please!" James pleaded desperately, coming around and dropping to his knees in front of her. "Please, Carina! This is my last hope to change Lily's mind!"

"I don't want to accidentally hurt Lily," Carina said hesitantly.

Understanding filled James eyes, and he rose to his feet, towering over her suddenly. He gently grasped her hands, his large ones completely engulfing hers in warmth. "I don't either." He insisted. "We'll never let it get that far. And besides, if you help her realize she's wanted to be with me all along, won't you be helping your friend in the end?"

"I don't know," she said edgily.

"Please."

She melted at the sight of James' genuinely desperate gaze. She'd never heard him say 'please' this many times in her life; James Potter was not one to beg- ever. There was very little she wouldn't do to help her friends. And he was right. If Lily didn't like him, she wouldn't get hurt from their little plan. If she did, then maybe she'd manage to help her friend overcome her own stubbornness. Either way, she could help James get some closure.

Carina sighed helplessly.

"Alright, count me in."

~o~o~o~

I really enjoyed writing this ^_^ It has a slightly different tone from Promise to the Past (Marauders) and Perfectly Matched (Dramione), both of which are a bit more serious and intense. This one is meant to be more playful and less centered around the war (at least for now)

Let me know what you all think, I'd love some feedback.

~Mischief Managed