I do not own NCIS only an over active imagination which I am trying to put to work on my other stories, but it is not wanting to comply. I was also going to make this a multi chapter story but decided to simply put it all in one.
I don't dance was inspired by the song with the same title, "I don't dance" sung by Lee Brice. As well as the song "Mine would be you" by Blake Shelton. Enjoy.
- I don't dance -
- Chapter 1 -
"You can't die on him," she whispered.
"On who?" the Director of NCIS asked in a whisper not bothering to try to turn to the woman who was talking to her.
"Leroy," the Director could not help but chuckled but as soon as she did, she regret it and stopped, the pain in her abdomen too strong.
"It's over Diane… let it go," the Director whispered. Diane shook her head.
"I saw you two tonight; I saw what I saw almost a decade ago." Diane fell silent hoping for the Director to become curious, but she stayed quiet. "You can't die," she shouted startling the Director, her eyes opening.
"Let me go, Diane," the Director whispered with pain and renounce faith, her eyes slowly drooping close once more.
"You can't die, Director, you'll kill him."
"He'll be fine, Diane, he's always fine." Diane shook her head.
"Je- ten years ago I saw Leroy asked you to dance," Diane whispered making the Director look up to her, her eyes half open, curious to what she was talking about.
"What?"
"I was dating Tobias and he invited me to the annual ball… I knew Leroy will be there, but I wasn't sure. I was hoping he would be there, hoping that he would see me moving on and regret letting me go but… but it was I who regretted going." The Director looked at her, but Diane's eyes were on her own dirty lap that had some blood stains.
"You were dancing with other men and were having fun. Even I knew by looking at you that you loved to dance. Leroy saw it too and even though he was seeing Stephanie but not with her, and you told me there was nothing between you two then… I saw the way he looked at you and I saw him do something he never did with me… I even asked Stephanie later if he ever dance with her and she said he never did." The Director was no longer looking at Diane, her focus on the opposite side of the wall, remembering.
"I enjoy dancing, but Leroy never asked something I appreciate from Tobias because he would give into my 'please'… Leroy never did. I asked Stephanie and she said he never dance either. Ten years ago, I saw the power you had over him and tonight I saw that again." Diane looked up to see the woman she hated because of the power she held over the famous Leroy Jethro Gibbs.
"You have him in the palm of your hands, Director," Diane told her.
"That ship sailed away years ago, Diane," the Director whispered.
"He asked you to dance tonight, Jennifer," Diane shouted at her.
"It has always been a fight for dominance and control for him and me, Diane. It has never been something genuine, only control." The Director said her head falling into her chest, her neck tired of holding it up.
"Don't you dare, give up now, Director. I hear them, closer than before," Diane said in a rush, wishing she could get up or crawl across the floor to the red head opposite of her. But a wooden beam that had fallen over her left leg after the explosion prevented her from moving. The Director herself could not move as there were two beams across her body and Diane feared something more that she couldn't see. The Director was sneaky at the beginning, but she had stopped caring a long time ago, as she wiped her mouth with her long sleeve blazer showing blood.
"You're hearing things," the Director whispered to her, her eyes close.
"You can't give up," Diane shouted at her trying to get her to continue to talk. "If you won't wait on Leroy wait until someone comes… I can't… I can't see you…"
"Then close your eyes," the Director told her but didn't open hers. Diane scoffed.
"It's so easy for you and him," she told her. "'Then close your eyes', 'then turn around', 'then walk away'. Did you learn that from him? When the getting gets hard, turn away from it, ignore it, it will eventually disappear." The Director said nothing, but Diane could still see her chest move up and down slowly.
"Help! Help the Director's hurt!" She started to shout, wanting someone to hear her, wanting someone to come and rescue them, rescue the Director. Rescue… it was hard to admit but rescue the woman who held Leroy Jethro Gibbs' heart in the palm of her hand. Because he didn't dance… yet he did it with her.
- I don't dance -
- Chapter 2 -
The past
"Leroy… would you dance with me," Diane asked with so much hope and fear in her voice. Her eyes showing what her mind already knew.
"I don't dance, Diane," he said to her getting up from his seat and making his way to the bar. But Diane wouldn't give up; she would get that dance from him one day.
The past
"Leroy, take me dancing," Diane asked months later after their wedding.
"Diane, I don't dance," he said after he had laughed at her. He didn't care to see the hurt in her eyes as he walked by her and towards the basement. She wondered letting him walk away if he would ever dance with her.
The past
"Leroy, there's nothing wrong in dancing," she told him one evening after dinner, months later.
"Diane, I don't dance," he told her simply.
"But I do… one dance, Leroy; one dance is all I'm asking for."
"Then you will forever ask because I don't dance." He told her, putting his plate on the sink and making his way to the basement.
The past
When she saw them across the room and in the middle of the dance floor... she wondered… She wondered if he had lied to her about dancing. She wondered if the reason he never danced with her was because he was already dancing with someone else.
She hated to say this, but his marine uniform looked great by her flowing white dress… and the way they moved with the music and with each other… she wouldn't be surprise if many of the on lookers thought they were more.
She came to the ball to get back at Leroy, but he didn't seem to care. She was startled by the hand on her back. She turned to see Tobias who gave her a smile.
"Do you want to dance?" He asked and she had to say yes… there was at least one man in this room who wanted to dance with her.
The past
"Stephanie, Leroy does this, let him go," Diane told her with sympathy but also a little harsh.
"Diane, I can't forget a year," she told her with shock and defiance. "He was my husband. How can he simply walk away from us?"
"Because it's not him who is doing the walking, Stephanie," Diane told her very sincerely. "It's us who are doing it; it's him who is letting us."
"Why? Why doesn't he come after me?"
"Because it isn't you, he wants," Diane told her. Stephanie looked at her perplex.
"What?" Diane bit her lip not knowing if telling Stephanie her beliefs was a good idea.
"Stephanie… did he ever dance with you?" Diane asked, changing the subject but then not completely.
"No," she whispered looking down at her hands in her lap. "I always asked him to… but he never did. He always said-"
"That he doesn't dance," Diane finished for her. Stephanie looked up at her confused. "There's only one woman whom I've ever seen Leroy dance with," she told Stephanie sitting in front of her.
"Wh- what?"
"There is only one woman I have ever seen Leroy Jethro Gibbs dance with… and that was his partner," she finished.
"But… they were never together," Stephanie explained confused in why Diane was bringing this up. Jethro had told her they were never together.
"But he danced with her," Diane told her. Stephanie looked at Diane and then out the window behind Diane.
"But… but she's gone," she told her looking into her eyes.
"She may be physically but is she emotionally?" Diane asked her, looking back into her eyes. Stephanie looked away breaking eye contact and Diane took this as a sign to back off and change the subject.
The past (The Ex-file)
"I saw it today," is the first thing Stephanie said when Diane opened her front door.
"Saw what?" Diane asked confused. Diane knew the case had been hard on Stephanie, having found out that her boyfriend was not only cheating on you but had also killed someone.
"I saw them dance," she said but Diane did not understand.
"Who?" Diane asked still confused.
"Jethro and the Director," Stephanie told her.
"What? Leroy is with the colonel," Diane exclaimed. Stephanie looked at her and realized that the woman in front of her didn't see it at all.
"You don't see it," Stephanie told her and Diane only stared at her confused. Stephanie realized that what Diane had told her so long ago was very true; Jethro did dance with the Director. But Diane seemed to have forgotten all about it, because Leroy Jethro Gibbs doesn't dance… except for one person. And Stephanie wondered if dancing was all they had done.
- I don't dance -
- Chapter 3 -
Earlier at the ball
"Are you enjoying yourself, Director?" The Director turned around to face him slowly, having felt him crossing the room towards her moments ago. The ball was one Capitol Hill had set up and Gibbs team had been called to work security along with other agents in their agencies.
"I am agent Gibbs," she told him with a sincere smile in her face and a spark in her eyes.
"Would you like to dance, Jenny?" He asked suddenly, but Jenny didn't show a hint of surprise.
"I would love to, Jethro," she answered putting her hand on his extended one. Neither paid attention to their surroundings as they danced together.
Thirty minutes later
"Thank you, Jethro," Jenny told him as she stood against his chest after being spin around and around in circles by him. Jethro smiled back at her, loving that it was him who had put that smile on her face and that shine in her eyes-him.
"You're welcome Jenny," he whispered. Moments later their dance came to an end and she was called by someone to do something or other. Jethro made his way to his secure post but kept his eyes on her, until he could no longer see her because of the surrounding people.
Fifteen minutes later
A loud sound of an explosion was heard, the house shook, and the lights turned off. Every security guard stood up from the places they had ducked down, their arms in their hands and their minds in high alert.
"DiNozzo, get the people out of here," he yelled over his radio. "McGee get the power up, David, find where the explosion came from, I'm finding the Director."
Ten minutes later
"Have you seen the Director?" Gibbs asked Fornell as he ran towards him.
"No, have you seen Diane?" Gibbs looked at him confuse. "She came with her husband but left about twenty minutes ago to the bathroom." Gibbs tried to remember any other red head he might have seen but his eyes had only been on one- Jenny, he shook his head. Both kept walking down the hallway when Fornell stopped.
"I hear something," Fornell said, "I think is Diane," he said making his way down the hallway where the explosion seemed to have come from. Moments later they saw Ziva moving wood from an entrance.
"Ziva," Gibbs shouted at her, he was confused by the state she seemed to be moving. Her hands were shaking, and her moves were frantic. When she turned around, he stopped, her eyes were red, tears behind them, and full of concern and fear. He didn't say anything as he made his way beside her instantly and started moving wood out of the way as well, Fornell right beside him. Neither said anything as they clearly heard Diane's voice, neither said anything at what she shouted either.
"Help! Help the Director is hurt!"
- I don't dance -
- Chapter 4 -
"We're getting you out, Diane," Fornell said after moments of digging and composing his voice.
"Thank god," he heard Diane said. "Get the paramedics, call Leroy, get in here already! She lost consciousness about two minutes ago, we both have wooden beams across us, preventing us from getting out."
"We're getting you as fast as we can, Diane," Fornell said after composing his voice once more. He had dropped the plank in his hands when he heard his ex-wife tell him about the woman she hated. Diane resented the Director of NCIS for having something she never did- Gibbs' heart.
"She doesn't have time, Tobias," he heard her shout. "She's… blood is coming out of her mouth, Tobias," she said in a voice full of fear and concern. "Tobias, hurry please," he heard her say and her movement as well as the others in the hallway became faster. Tony, Tim, the Director's three personal guards as well as a few FBI agents, Diane's husband and many others had joined the rescue.
"Is there another way into the bathroom?" Tobias asked behind him, hoping someone would answer him.
"No," someone did.
"We're getting an opening," Ziva said all sudden; they all heard Diane shout for joy. Two minutes later, the opening was large enough where Jethro went right through and Tobias followed right behind him. Both man towards the woman they once loved or may still love.
Ziva, Tony and two FBI agents followed, Tim going to get the paramedics to come towards the opening. Those left kept making the opening bigger.
"You're okay, Diane," Tobias told her as he briefly touched her shoulder and went to move the wooden beam from her lap, his two agents helping him. Across the room, Gibbs press one hand on the Director's neck as his other went to her cheek, her pale cheek.
"Her pulse is weak," he whispered to Ziva and Tony who let go of the breath they had been holding since they had discovered the Director had been hurt. Both slowly moved the wooden beams from the Director's body, Gibbs keeping Jenny in one position.
"Jenny," he shouted with fear when she started to cough blood when the beam was removed from over her. Ziva and Tony's hands were shaking and their eyes full of fear, but they needed to remove the other beam.
"Jen," Ziva and Tony heard their boss whispered full of pain but neither said anything. "Jen, you have to make it," Gibbs continued.
Five minutes later, Diane was being carried out in a stretcher. She had told the set of paramedics that were attending her to focus on the Director, but they hadn't listened. She had shouted until she was in the hallway and her husband put his hand on her arm and his eyes on her made it real. She had been in an explosion, she had been trapped in the bathroom, she had feared for her life but above all she had feared for the life of the woman right across from her. Diane started to cry and sobbed as they led her to the ambulance.
It was minutes later when the Director was pulled out of the bathroom as well; it had taken almost five minutes longer than Diane's rescue. Her wounds greater and those internal had caused the paramedics to treat her more carefully.
When she emerged from the bathroom, the whole hallway fell silent. None of them recognized the Director. She had dirt all over her. But that's not what caused the men and women in the hallway to stop, stare and pray. It was the amount of red they saw on that once white flowing dress. It was the paleness in her face; it was the lifeless body that passed by them. They couldn't see her chest move but they knew she was alive because of the air mask the paramedics had put over her mouth in. Because of the faces of the agents that most probably knew her the best. Those agents showed fear in their eyes, but they didn't hold catastrophe… yet.
- The hospital -
Doctor Mallard, 'Ducky', had arrived at Bethesda twenty minutes ago. His Director and once close friend had arrived not fifteen minutes ago. He hadn't dared look at neither Jethro's face, nor Ziva's nor Tony's. His mission was to be with the Director. It would not be till close to several hours later when he was able to deliver any news.
Meanwhile
"Gibbs," he heard someone called out to him, but he was not paying any attention. "My team is looking at who did this. We have McGee helping with the technology part; it seems the bomb was cell activated. I'll come by to give you updates as we find things." Gibbs said nothing as he kept his eyes on the floor. The man, who had spoken to him, showed him a coffee cup and then placed it in front of him on the floor. The man said nothing else, standing up and walking away.
"What can I help in?" Tony said standing up when Fornell had returned from delivering the coffee to Gibbs.
"I think you're better suited here," Fornell told him.
"Ziva will stay, I… I need to find these bastards." Tony told him and Fornell understood moving his hands towards the exit. Ziva watched them go but said nothing to stop them, she didn't dare move.
Hours later
"Any news?" Tony asked sitting down tired beside Ziva. She looked up at him and shook her head.
"Did you get them?" Ziva asked seeing the gleam in Tony's eyes and the accomplishment in Tim's.
"We did," Tony said looking past her and past Gibbs and to the doors where news would hopefully come through.
"Dead?" Ziva asked.
"One," Tim said, "the one that made the call. The rest are in custody." Ziva gave him a nod. At least one was dead… at least one was dead.
Hours later
The three agents stood up at the sound of their leader standing up. They all made their way to Ducky who didn't look well; he had aged decades.
"She… she's in a coma." He whispered to Gibbs whose face had lost the remaining color that it had. "They aren't… giving us hope," he finished as he tried to control his emotions and the tears in his eyes. The three agents felt their heart fall to the ground at the doctor's words and his actions. Gibbs stood looking at Ducky but then moved away, his head down and his eyes blinking rapidly, to prevent tears from falling.
"They've- She's in room 101-" Ducky started to say but Gibbs was already moving towards the room, not caring what else he had to say. He needed to get to Jenny.
- I don't dance -
- Chapter 5 -
"Jen," Gibbs whispered as he entered the room and saw the woman, he… he knew he had loved once, and he knew he loved now but how could he tell her. He sat on the chair beside her bed and took her hand between his.
"After Shannon, Jen… after Shannon I never thought I would ever be happy again. I found women but they were only replacements. But you…" He stopped speaking and placed his head on the bed by her side, her hand over his head, one of his hands still holding it as the other went over her legs.
"You have been the best thing that has ever happen to me since Shannon and Kelly. I never had to replace them with you, you understood without knowing." He stopped speaking as he let himself cry for someone else who wasn't his first wife and daughter.
"You've been one of the greatest chapters in my life, Jenny. And the parts in my life that I can't think about because it hurts too much, you let go. You didn't push, you didn't probe, you understood to let me be… but the time I needed to be pushed, the time I needed to understand and be pushed… you walked away. I let you walk away and that will always be a regret I will have… Jenny… I can't let you go; I can't let you die not when we are both here, ready for the next step. I'm ready, Jenny, I'm ready to dance with you for the rest of our lives, please don't go."
- Hospital hallway -
"She has to make it," Tony whispered out loud to no one in particular.
"Then we must pray with all our might," Ducky answered him.
"I don't know if Gibbs will be able to work through this," Tim whispered.
"If-" Ducky said clearing his throat, "he will, it will only take a long time, a very long time."
"She loved him," Ziva said suddenly after the hallway had fallen silent. "She didn't speak about her time before Mossad a lot, back then I thought it was a kidnapping that might have changed her or an explosion, something. I asked her once what made her change, what made her different because I could see it in her eyes. She would always shake her head but this one time… this one time she told me, and I told myself I would never do what she did."
"What did she do?" Tony asked after moments of silence had followed Ziva's words.
"She put her heart on the line and it was broken," she whispered. "She said he made it so easy to fall in love with him but so hard to love. He made her so happy but also hurt her deeply."
"He loved her too, Ziva" Ducky told her looking at her.
"And yet he let her go, over and over and over again." Ziva told him looking at him. "I remember the many times I saw them together, I saw her look at him or towards him, and I see now what I didn't see then. He was her one regret… but a regret she lived with and continued to live with, knowing she could never go back to what they were."
Ducky said nothing as he thought of the many times, he saw Jethro and Jennifer together. Jethro, he had no doubt, had loved Jennifer back in Paris. However, when Jennifer had returned to NCIS as their new director, Jethro had kept her at arm's length. He had seen Jennifer put herself in the line for Jethro many times, but Jethro had not. At one-point, Ducky thought Jennifer might still want to rekindle something with her once partner but maybe Ziva was right. The look he had seen in Jennifer's eyes was not one of longing but one of resignation and reality. She had left Jethro years ago, a regret she might have had, but one she accepted and moved forward with.
"Do you think Gibbs has regrets?" Tim asked to no one in particular. "I've seen them together as well, but boss always seemed to have his guard up."
"Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice shame on me," Tony told him. The group in the hallway fell silent at Tony's words. Do people not deserve a second chance, Tim thought to himself. Does love not deserve a possible second chance?
- The hospital room -
"Jenny," Gibbs woke up frightened when he heard the constant sound from the machine. "Jen!" he shouted as he was pushed back and away from the bed by nurses. A doctor stood on one side of the bed while three nurses surrounded the bed to help. Paddles were given to the doctor as Jenny was laid flat on her back and the paddles place over her chest.
"Clear," he shouted and then Jenny jumped by the voltage going through her body, trying to restart her heart. Gibbs heart broke as he saw this and saw it three more time before he saw the defeat look in the doctors and nurses' eyes. The doctor called out a number once more and when Jenny's heart was shock, but no heart beat was heard from it, the doctor shook his head. The doctor called time of death while a nurse took the paddles from his hands. Another nurse turned off the machine and the doctor slowly raised the white sheet over her face.
Gibbs shouted, moving forward and pushing the doctor away as he touched Jenny's neck and whispered to her not to go, not to leave him alone, not to die. He let tears fall down his face as he brought her to him and into his chest, hugging her and whispering to her to come back to him, that she couldn't die.
The doctor signaled the nurses to let him be while he informed the other part of the visitors the news. However, he didn't need to speak as he moved towards them, something in his face telling them what had happened.
- I don't dance -
- Chapter 6 -
NCIS was not the same after the death of their first woman director. NCIS might never be the same or even as it was before their first woman director. Jennifer Shepard had made a difference in politics, in the agency and in its agents lives.
Flags across Washington D.C. had been ordered at half-staff in remembrance of this woman and her work not only as the director of a federal agency but also as an agent, whose work had been to protect the United States from the evil inside its walls as well as the evil that tried to penetrate it.
The top MCR Team had been given a week off after the director's death, Sec Nav as well as the new director, Leon Vance, knowing of the relationship between the team and their formal director.
Hours after her death, the team; Tony, Ziva, Tim, Ducky and Abby had found Gibbs in his basement, under his half-built boat, drinking. Abby leaned against Tim on the stairs, Tony sat on the floor, his legs stretched out, near the boat, Ziva beside him and lastly Ducky sat on the only available chair in the basement. No one said anything as they let tears fall freely down their faces.
It was never my intention to kill Jenny. But I have other works still left unfinished and I do not think I have the long-term dedication to make this fiction into a 'happily ever after'. As both Jenny and Jethro have a lot of growing to do as characters who might want to make their relationship work. Maybe in the future someday I'll return to this story.