My fake girlfriend

Chapter one

All the wrong places

Raining. It was raining. But that was okay. Her face was already wet.

Anna stepped out of her car on shaky legs and began the slow walk towards her front door. She stumbled and tried to regain her balance, but her ridiculous high heels were no help, and she fell to her knees.

Fuck it.

She pulled off the heels and threw them into the car. She grabbed onto the handle and slowly pulled herself to her feet, then slammed the door shut. Now her nice black socks were soaked. Like it mattered.

What's wrong with me? she asked herself again. This was supposed to be the good one. He was nice, humble, respectful of me – everything the first one wasn't. So why did this still happen?

Her feet splashed through the puddles on the walkway. The rain tamped down her hair, and she felt it coming loose from the bun she had wrangled it into. She was sure her makeup was a mess, too.

If He was here, He'd laugh and say I told you so.

She took a deep, shuddering breath, and looked at her house. Well, He wasn't here. Nobody was. Mom and Dad were overseas, her sister was at college, and she was here, at this big, empty house.

She shakily pulled out her keys, unlocked the door, and stepped inside.

I thought I turned the lights off, was her first thought. And…the TV?...

"Anna?"

Anna froze. No, it couldn't be…

A young woman rose from the couch and turned to face her. Her platinum-blonde braid whipped around as she turned to face her, and her bright blue eyes went wide.

In spite of everything, Anna smiled. "Elsa," she croaked.

Elsa dashed toward her sister. She bumped her shin on the end table, but it didn't seem to slow her down. She closed the distance and threw her arms around her sister. Anna returned the embrace, squeezing just as hard. "Oh, Anna, it's so good to see you again," she said.

"You too, sis," Anna said.

For a moment, neither one said anything. Then Anna broke the hug. "So what are you doing here?" she asked. "You said you wouldn't be able to visit for another couple of weeks."

"Ah, do I need a reason to visit my favorite baby sister?" Elsa said.

Anna raised an eyebrow. "Did Tiana kick you out again?"

"Big time," Elsa said with a half smile. "So, what are you doing here? You said you'd be out tonight."

Anna's smile started to fade. The memories of that night, which had been momentarily crowded out by surprise, now rushed back.

"Yeah, you said you'd be out on a…" Elsa trailed off. She looked Anna up and down, and her face fell. "Oh," she said. She took Anna's hands in hers. "Poor baby."

Anna sniffled. Tears began to pool in her eyes.

"What's his name?" Elsa asked, voice suddenly sharp.

"No, Elsa, don't-"

"Give me his name and his address," Elsa said anger rising in her voice. "I'll kick his fucking teeth in."

"It wasn't his fault," Anna said.

"I don't care. Another asshole has made my baby sister cry, so I'm gonna do to him what I should've done to-"

"I broke up with him!" Anna shouted.

Elsa blinked. "What?"

The shout had sapped what was left of Anna's strength. "I did it," she said weakly. She lowered her head, and her knees buckled. "So I'm…I'm the asshole…"

Elsa rushed forward and caught her before she fell. She hugged her, and hugged her tight.

xxxxxxx

Anna lay on the couch in the fetal position. Elsa had wrapped her in every blanket she could find, but she was still shivering. She had gotten her out of her soaking clothes quickly and efficiently, and she'd run upstairs to grab Anna's silk pajamas as soon as Anna was stable enough to be left alone for those few seconds. It had taken a good ten minutes for her to even get to that point.

The older girl ran around the kitchen, trying to assemble the ingredients for hot chocolate as quickly as possible. She'd been loath to leave her sister's side again, but eventually she had decided that mere proximity wouldn't be enough, and she'd rushed to prepare Anna's favorite drink. Even then, she'd frequently run back to the living room to squeeze her hand every chance she could.

It broke her heart to see her sister like this. Elsa had been in some bad breakups, too, but she'd taken them in stride. Anna, though, had always been more sensitive. To have not one, but two breakups so close together must be devastating.

Plus, none of Elsa's girlfriends had been half as bad as Anna's first boyfriend. Elsa still saw red every time she thought about that piece of shit. To think that anyone could be so…

She shook her head. That was for another time. Right now Anna needed compassion, not revenge.

After what seemed like an eternity, the drink reached an acceptable temperature. Elsa hurried to apply the finishing touches. "Almost ready!" she shouted. "I just need to add the secret ingredient!"

Anna poked her head over the couch. "Is it love?" she managed weakly.

Elsa grinned. "No, that's not a secret ingredient at all," she replied. She reached into the cupboard above the microwave and pulled out a clear bottle. "This is."

"Elsa, you know I'm not old enough," Anna said.

"Nonsense," Elsa said, pouring the liquor in generously. "This is vodka. The drinking age in Russia is 18, so you're all good." She stirred the drink vigorously, then topped it with a quick spray of whipped cream before handing it to her sister.

Anna managed a chuckle. "I don't think that's how it works, Elsa," she said. Nevertheless, she took the cup and began to sip.

They were both silent for a while. Anna's hands stopped shaking as she drank more. Eventually, Elsa spoke up. "So, want to talk about it?"

Anna said nothing at first, simply taking another sip. She took a deep, long breath, then a second. Then she lifted her head. "So, this was our third date, right?" she said. "So when we first met up in the parking lot, he gave me a kiss."

Elsa's eyes narrowed.

"Which was fine," Anna said hurriedly. "He wasn't overstepping his boundaries or anything, I was okay with him doing it. But when he kissed me, I just felt…nothing."

"Nothing at all?" Elsa asked.

Anna shook her head.

"And this was your first kiss with Kristoff?"

Anna fidgeted. "Well, sort of. He kissed me on the cheek, after the movie, on the last date, and that one was also pretty underwhelming."

Elsa nodded her head. "That's definitely not a good sign."

"So then, while we were eating, we talked – a little. But I felt like we had already said everything there was to say to each other, you know?"

Elsa kept nodding, a picture beginning to form in her mind.

"Of course, back when I was dating H- the other guy, that didn't really happen. We both had a lot to talk about in the first few dates, and later on, even when I stopped talking, he'd still talk on and on."

Anna's hands started to tremble again. Elsa hastily steered the conversation back on track. "So, that didn't happen with Kristoff?"

"No. We just talked less and less," Anna said. "I started feeling guilty, like I was just wasting his time." Her voice was getting shakier, more emotional now. "Eventually, he just asked me if anything was wrong. I told him it was nothing, but he insisted, and eventually I just told him…I just told him…"

Elsa took her hand. "You told him that you didn't feel attracted to him."

Anna winced. "I was a bit gentler than that," she said. She lowered her head shamefully. "But not much."

She pulled her hand out of Elsa's and buried her head in her hands. Elsa scooted closer and draped her arm around Anna's shoulders. "How did he take it?" she asked softly.

"P-pretty well, I guess," she said. "H-he just kind of sighed and said, 'That's okay, I…I knew you were out of my league, anyway.'"

Elsa winced. Such a nice guy.

"I…I felt like the biggest piece of shit in the world," Anna said.

Elsa drew her in for a hug. Anna wrapped her arms around her sister and squeezed her tight, as tears streaked down her face.

"It's okay," the older woman said, stroking Anna's hair. "You don't have to feel bad about this. You didn't owe him anything, you aren't obligated to have feelings for him just because you went on a few dates with him."

"But it's not just him!" Anna wailed. "On the drive home, I tried thinking of other guys I might want to date instead. I couldn't think of anyone! There was nobody else I even wanted to be with. But I don't want to be alone either!" She clutched her head. "So what the fuck is wrong with me? Am I just…broken forever now?"

"Of course not," Elsa soothed, gripping Anna harder. "You just haven't found the right person yet. It doesn't mean anything's wrong with you."

"But-"

"Shh," Elsa commanded. Anna obliged, and her protestations faded to whimpers.

My poor baby sister. At least after my first breakup, Mom and Dad were here for me. But now they're 5,000 miles away.

Not that she could throw stones in that department. She only took the 30-minute bus ride back home once a month or so. Even after Anna's first breakup, she only visited a couple times afterwards, which now felt horribly inadequate.

And I've got a 7:30 class tomorrow. I won't even be here when she wakes up. Fuck.

For a time, there was silence except for Anna's shuddering breaths. Elsa rewound their conversation, trying to think of something to say, something that would help. One line stuck out in her mind.

"You said you tried thinking of other guys you'd want to go out with," she said, gingerly pulling away from her sister.

Anna sniffed. "Yeah," she said.

"Just guys? No girls?"

"Of course…" Anna said, trailing off.

"Any particular reason for that?" Elsa asked.

"No, I…I guess not. Only guys have ever asked me out to begin with, so I guess I just went with that." She had stopped crying now, and Elsa could almost heart the gears in her head turning. "Are you suggesting…"

"Anna Arendelle, perhaps you've been playing the wrong game this whole time," Elsa said with a grin. "Or at least, playing for the wrong team."

"Gee, I…wow." Anna ran her hand through her hair. "Do you really think so? That I might actually be a…a lesbian?"

"You tell me," Elsa answered. "It's your libido."

Anna's brow furrowed. "I…I…I don't really know," she confessed. "I've never thought about it that much. I only started thinking about dating last year."

"Okay, let's just think about it logically," Elsa said patiently. "What kind of porn do you watch?"

Anna's face turned bright red. "Jesus, Elsa!"

"Sorry," Elsa said.

The irony was pretty funny. There was a time when she would have been far more uncomfortable than Anna at talking about this kind of thing. But a lot of her barriers had been obliterated in the last three years, thanks to Belle. And Esmerelda. And Jasmine. And Esmerelda again.

Anna buried her face in her blankets. "I don't…really…watch much…porn," she mumbled.

Elsa nodded understandingly. "I get it," she said. "You're pretty inexperienced with all of this."

Anna nodded.

"So, the answer's simple. You need experience. Try dating a couple girls, see if you like it."

Anna shook her head. "Elsa, I don't know any lesbians at school. I'm sure there are some, but I don't know who. And even if I did, what am I supposed to say? 'Hi, I'm Anna, and I think I might be gay, but I'm not sure, so do you mind if I date you for a bit, just to figure it out?'"

"It's not as bad as that," Elsa said. "Once you get some experience, you'll figure out how it works."

"But how do I get practice if I don't have any practice to begin with?" she pointed out. "Besides, I'm not even that good at regular dating. Just ask Kristoff…" With that, her shoulders dropped again.

Elsa stroked her chin. She had a point – it wasn't exactly easy to get into the same-sex dating scene, especially in the smallish town they lived in. She herself had been very lucky – Belle had asked her out, and she'd later admitted that taking that leap of faith had been terrifying. And Anna wasn't exactly in a confident mood at the moment. So what to do?

The solution hit her like a brick.

She needs practice dating. And I need to spend more time with her. Two birds, one stone.

"Don't worry, I'll help you practice," Elsa said.

Anna looked up. "Practice?"

"Yeah. We'll have a pretend date!" she declared.

Anna's eyes widened. "Now, when you say 'pretend date…'"

"Tomorrow, after school. I don't have any evening classes, so we can go on a dinner date, at…Vito's, maybe? I'll show you the ropes on dating another girl – what to say, what to do, how to figure out if she's into you, the whole thing. What do you think?"

Anna thought for a moment. "I don't know, Elsa. It seems kind of…weird. I mean, we're sisters, for god's sake! What if someone sees us?"

"It'll be fine," Elsa said. "It's just a dinner date. It's not like we'll be making out or anything."

"Yeah, you're right," Anna said.

Elsa grinned. "Not on the first date, anyway. I'm not a slut."

Anna chuckled nervously. Obviously, she'd gotten the joke, but the implications seemed to discomfort her.

"And, besides," Elsa said, hurriedly changing the subject. "I've barely gone out in this town in three years. Nobody would recognize me, anyway."

"That's true," Anna admitted.

Elsa placed her hands on Anna's. "It's up to you," she said. "If you think it'd be too uncomfortable, we don't have to do it. Your choice."

Anna looked at their hands, then at Elsa. Within her eyes, Elsa saw nothing but trust and love.

"You know what?" Anna said. "Let's do it."

Elsa let go of a breath she hadn't realized she was holding. "All right, it's a date!" she said. "I'll see you at Vito's tomorrow at 5:30."

"Count on it!" Anna said. She looked at the clock. "I should really get to bed," she said.

"Yeah, me too, if I want to catch the 6:00 bus tomorrow morning," Elsa said.

Anna bounded up the stairs. "In that case, good night, fake girlfriend!" she said, going into her room.

"Don't call me a fake girlfriend before the first fake date!" Elsa reprimanded. "I might think you're too fake clingy!"

Anna laughed as she closed the door – her first genuine laugh of the night. It warmed Elsa's heart to hear it.

After all, that's what I'm doing this for. To make her happy.