After the War

The wind is calm as the waves hit the sand. The moon is at its highest point and the stars light up the sky. Ember Island always has the best views. Katara hates admitting this though. For so long she saw the Fire Nation as the root of all evil. But the past few months have changed a lot. Three months ago she arrived in the the Fire Nation and within those three months, she had an epiphany—the Fire Nation was no different than any of the other nations. A nation itself is not inherently evil, she realized, only the people and their actions can determine the outcome of a nation.

In three months Katara learned the bending practices of her tribe at the price of learning bloodbending. But she also saved many Fire Nation villages. And as a result she learned about the people and that they aren't so different from her after all. She had an enemy who became her teammate. That teammate took her on a life changing journey, and then that teammate became her friend. They now take residence in the very home of the man who they are meant to defeat in the upcoming month. And the irony doesn't stop there. You see, while people see her and the Fire Lord's son as friends, they are only seeing half of the picture. Because only a week after their newfound friendship, it turned into something more.

After Yon Rha

Katara spent the first week after the confrontation of Yon Rha wrapped up in Zuko's arms crying her eyes out from flashbacks she thought she buried over years of self determination and distraction. Zuko thought it would be a good idea to wait a few days before sending word to the rest of the gaang where they were so that Katara could have the time she needed to breathe.

The first night after the confrontation, she and Zuko found shelter in a dam cave looking over the bluffs of Whale tale Island. Aside from the howling winds and drops of rain, it was otherwise quiet. Night came and so did the memories.

Katara started hyperventilating and crying hysterically. She was having a flashback. And it scared her. She never felt so much in such a short amount of time. It was like a dam broke and all the emotions she locked away for years came flooding out of her mind. She couldn't breathe. The whole room was spinning. A minute later Zuko entered the room and gave her a look that said more than any words ever could. He understood. And with that look, she knew she could breathe.

It was the first time she had gotten to mourn Kya's death. As a child, there had been no time; After Kya's death she didn't have time to mourn, the war was in full swing and the tribe was panicked and shocked at the news of their chief being slaughtered. The people were told a different story from the truth. The people were told that Kya's death was planned from the beginning to wreak havoc amongst her people and create unrest. They never learned the truth. They never learned the real target was Kya's daughter for being born a crime.

Katara didn't have time to ponder that or take in the lie she would have to continue to feed her people over the years. She didn't even flinch when her father left. She understood. If Katara had been old enough she would've joined him and taken out all her anger on the nation that took her mother from her.

But her father was gone, the new chief was leading their tribe's army to protect their land. So there wasn't time to grieve over her slaughtered mother and neglectful father—all she could do was get to work and help lead her people. She grew up too fast and she knew that. But she didn't realize just how much of a toll this would take on her. And she never imagined she would be feeling all of these emotions while splayed in the arms of the man whose father took both their mothers from them.

She could hear the steady heartbeat rumbling in Zuko's chest. It comforts her. Like a lullaby telling her it was all going to be okay. This lullaby helps abate her tears. It soothes her and makes her feel at home… Who would've thought she would find a home in the arms of the enemy, in the heart of the enemy? Whoa. easy there Katara. You're entering enemy territory…

She woke up with her head on his chest and to the sight of a peaceful firebender holding her in a manner so gentle, she could break it with a whisper.

It doesn't take long after her subtle movement, for his eyes to open. And when they do, Katara swears she feels fire being bent up her spine to her cheeks. Have his eyes always been this gold?

The second night they arrive at Zuko's old family vacation home in Ember island. The air was stale from lack of use over the years and doors were closed to rooms Katara could only assume held bad memories from a tortured past. One room called out to her. It turned out to be Azula's room as a child. Strange how so much could be said about a person through the possessions they held as a child. The room was decorated modestly. What stood out was the headless doll which Zuko said was given to her from their Uncle. The more she analyzed the room, the more stifling it felt and anger took the place of curiosity. Azula had a childhood. She did not.

After what felt like hours of contemplation, Katara decided this room was too much for her to handle, and sought out the comfort she was given yesterday. She felt a pull in her chest she dare not name, and found Zuko in his room doing the same thing she was... Remembering. He didn't hear her come in. He was too transfixed on the small dagger he always kept with him. The look in his eyes was glassy. A look she knew all too well from looking at her mothers necklace. The room was dark by choice, she knew the feeling, this old room must hold too much pain for him. Where the pain came from was unclear. Was it from good memories that went sour over time? Or was it bad memories that festered as he got older?

As soon as she exhales in solidarity with his pain, he turns to her, and the emotions explode like a boiling volcano waiting to erupt from the pressure, building inside.

That night was a repeat of the first. With one key difference. This time when she cries into his chest, Zuko doesn't stay still. This time she can feel his hands in her hair. Caressing each strand as if it were mere strands of gold. It's soothing? Soothing is not a word she would've ever associated with a firebender. But that's what this is, and Katara is not one to lie. So she admits it to herself. Zuko is soothing her. Zuko is… soothing.

Morning comes and the sun casts a light into Zuko's childhood room. It's a strange feeling, waking up at dawn. But she finds she kind of likes it. She likes feeling the calm that comes with the light of the sun rising and the knowledge of the moon setting. Her pillow is also quite comfortable; its constant rhythm is a melody she's coming to memorize. Katara knows this could be potentially dangerous. Using her former enemy's chest as a pillow, and the melody of his heart as her song. But feeling his arms wrapped protectively around her and a gentle hand cradling her head to his heart. She can't find it in herself to care. In fact… She revels in it.

The third night is not like the first two. Zuko is there holding her again. It's become a silent understanding between the two. They keep their distance in the sun, they come together in the night. Tonight is different. Because while Zuko holds her to his chest as gently as he has before, she does not cry... And as she feels sleep taking over her, she hears something other than their joined heartbeats. One word spoken before sleep takes her. One word whispered as if the wind itself was sending it to her ears.

"Beautiful."

This is bad. This is dangerous. Katara knows she's in trouble. Last night's word could've been from a dream, a thought, or even wishful thinking. There was no way Zuko would ever think of her in such a way. She is a peasant, she is a waterbender, she is- '"beautiful."

No! I am not-

"-Beautiful."

She's in trouble…

The fourth night is tense. The message has been sent with Appa to meet them at Zuko's old family vacation home on Ember Island. The peace of the past three nights is gone. In its place is a tension with questions and the knowledge that their sense of privacy and peace will soon end. Zuko is still holding her close. Only this time, Katara can swear he is holding her to his chest for not only her comfort, but his own. There is a new sense of intimacy tonight. She can't stop thinking about how Zuko called her pretty. What did this mean? This unspoken agreement between them was becoming more and more complicated. And the silence was starting to get stifling rather than comforting.

What if I made the wrong decision? I bloodbent again. Am I a monster?… I'm a monster-

"You're not a monster, Katara."

She stills. How long was she talking out loud? How much did he hear? But these thoughts come to a close as she realizes Zuk isn't done talking.

"You're beautiful." He says these words as if they're indisputable facts. His voice is groggy. It's past midnight. He must not even know what he's saying.

At least that's what she tells herself to excuse what she did next. It was quick but no less meaningful.

Katara gently removes herself from Zuko's broad chest to look at his face. His eyes are open, but they're clearly clouded with exhaustion. His eyes widen as he sees her looking at him with such softness. She reaches her hand slowly to cup his face. He stays still, unmoving, his eyes still wide with questions she herself didn't know the answers to. So she doesn't try. Instead, she lets her actions speak for her her as she presses a gentle kiss to his scarred cheek.

It's quick. Lasts no more than two- maybe three seconds. But it's enough for both of their body temperatures to heat up. More Zuko than her, obviously. His body suddenly feels like an inferno, but she doesn't move away. She's too shocked at what she's just done to move.

"Katara, I-"

"Don't." She quickly removes her eyes from his face and prepares to flee from the situation she just thrust herself into. He stops her before she can.

Morning comes, and so does the memories of last night. Last night wasn't the same as before. This time there was a bed and they were actually cuddling. No more hardwood floors. No more using cloaks as blankets. Instead they were in an actual bed with silk sheets and feathered comforters. Instead of gripping onto Zuko's tunic for purchase as the tears rolled down her face, he's holding her from behind with his arms gently encircling her exposed stomach.

It got too hot in the middle of the night so they both decided it was best to shed some clothing. Katara lays in only her wrappings, while Zuko wears only his pants. She hates to admit it, but she's never felt more comfortable in her life. She feels safe. She feels warm. She feels… like home. Very dangerous indeed.

The evening breeze is warm, but chilling at the same time. They decided to get dinner in town tonight. They walk in silence, side by side. So close to touching but not quite. They spent the day away from each other trying to gather their thoughts. It was Katara who broke the silence and suggested eating out. Stupid decision, really. It's one thing to spend time alone in a house together but- okay, yeah. She can admit it doesn't get much more intimate than that. Except you let him sleep with you last night… In a bed… Okay, that was a good point. You also cuddled him, too. Don't act like you didn't sniff his hair and touch his abs when he was asleep. Okay, her brain really needed to stop calling her out. It's not fair.

Dinner was served and Katara was surprised to find out that ocean kumquats were very similar to sea prunes and that Zuko seemed to enjoy them. Apparently being banished for three years leads people into trying new things. But that's not what's important. They had to talk. It seems Zuko knew that better than her and decided to break the silence.

"The rest of team will be arriving in two days…"

"I know." Katara sighs in defeat. She did know. But she didn't want to think about that. Things were too complicated now. She wishes she could go back to hating Zuko. That was simple. Back then, there was no gray area. Now, all there ever seems to be is gray. But not between good and evil. Not between love and hate- she doesn't think hating him would even be possible at this point. But maybe… Maybe she never did. Questions like this only make things harder…

"I'm sorry for last night."

That got her attention. Apparently the shock on her face was evident enough for him to continue, "I mean. I'm sorry for everything. I'm sorry for betraying you back in the caves. I'm sorry for hunting down your friends—I never wanted anyone to get hurt—I still don't. I never meant for anything to happen-"

Katara could tell he was just saying whatever words he could get out of his mouth. It was kind of adorable actually... A lot of things have been adorable about Zuko lately… "I'm not."

Those words shut him up. "What? What do you-"

Katara reaches across their table and grabs his hands.

"I'm not sorry for last night. I wanted it. Nothing happened, but…" a blush started heating her face. "I know what you're feeling."

Zuko gulps. "You do?"

"I think so… I hope so." She whispers the last sentence to herself. She needs to be more upfront. They're too similar. She knows he's not going to make the first move because she won't either. But someone has to. Someone has to start talking and stop avoiding things. She knows where their avoidance comes from. Fear.

Fear of losing someone. They both lost someone. Their mothers. Their homes. Themselves… The idea of talking about something that could change everything they've both worked so hard to create is what stops her—what stops them. Zuko's never backed down from a challenge before. She knows that because she's seen it with her own eyes. Watching his undying determination to get what he wanted was really inspiring. Even while they were on opposite sides, she could always admire his strength. He never gave up and neither did she. They never backed down from a fight. But emotions… That's a different story. They both lost so much. They only just found each other. She knows how he's feeling.

He's feeling like he's finally found a piece of himself he didn't even know was missing. Someone who understands him, through and through. Someone who can see what he's thinking before he does. Katara knows this because she feels the same way. She wants to tell him she understands. Tell him that she knows the fear in his eyes because they match her own. But one of them has to make the first move… So, she goes first.

"Zuko, I-" The words die on her lips because another pair are very much in the way at the moment. And she has no desire to stop them. Everything around her stills as she finally gives in to what she's been holding back inside her for so long.

Kissing Zuko was not like kissing anyone else. Kissing Jet was rough and passionate, but that's all it was. He was her first kiss and she'll always cherish that first experience. Kissing Aang was… well, it wasn't really anything. The first time they kissed was a do or die situation. She didn't really think much of it. It just was. Never in a million years would she think he actually felt something for her. She thought he understood where they stood. She was his guide, he was her responsibility. To say him kissing her at the invasion was a shock, would be an understatement. It was surprising but also very abrupt. She didn't really have enough time to react. All she knew was that when it was over, it wasn't what she wanted. But Zuko…

Kissing Zuko was like swimming in a hot spring slowly boiling over. It felt hot and cold at the same time. Push and pull, water and fire… Balance. It felt like two puzzle pieces finally coming together to make something amazing. It was soft and gentle. Yet strong and intense all the same. Passion was there. But not overwhelmingly so. It was perfect. You will marry a powerful bender.

Both she and Zuko pull back at the same time as soon those words flew through her mind. Did he hear it, too?

Little did Katara know that Zuko was hearing something similar in his brain as well Destiny is a funny thing, Prince Zuko.

That night they don't leave each other's side. They spend the rest of the evening watching the stars on the beach and when Zuko gives her a shell saying it reminded him of her, she kissed his burnt cheek and rested her head on his shoulder with his arms around her keeping her close to his chest.