Ok.

I'm here, again. Whyyyy

At least those assholes are stuck on a goose chase for Infinity Stones that they'll never find. Especially since those stones are atoms now.

But first things first. Is there anything you forgot to tell me memories?

I get stabbed, cue the snap, the poof away and- oh you got to be fucking kidding me.

Good thing Thanos knew how to make booze. I'm going to need a lot of it.

Another good thing is that this Thanos actually came prepared.

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Two Days Later

Oh boy that is exactly what I needed. Dying three times sucks man. By bus, by Stormbraker, then by gang bang. I'm done, let those superheroes come and try.

So I spent the two days drunk and high. Considering the fact that Thanos' body was pretty durable I'm sure that it can handle the side effects.

But the main reason for this wasn't only the fact that I might die again. Oh no no because there were chances of escaping alive but now oh no.

BOOM

A powerful beam of energy burst through my hut sending 'Thanos' outside. When 'he' lands I find what normally would get the entire audience roaring.

The entire roster of the Avengers. Snapped, spared, or new. Minus Tony and Ant-Man

Now you can see why I had it give up pretty easily. There was no chance in hell that either I or it could possibly beat them all. But sometimes the best ideas you can get are from hitting that dank space kush. Simply put, bullshiting. Plus the remains of the Black Order.

Everyone in an instant starts to restrain it. Webs, magic or just plain old brute force. While Thanos could break out of their hold, don't bother. Way too many of them. And of course it loses an arm, I'm not really surprised. But luckily the LMD was effective.

Captain America walks up to my model with a determined aura, confidence and hope mixed in. Ready to ask that damn question.

"Where are th-"

"The stones aren't here, Starkfucker." But I don't feel like letting him finish. Then he throws that shield at my face. Vibranium may not cut his skin that shit still hurts.

"He's right. The stones are gone." Rocket says after checking the Gauntlet from my fallen hand.

Steve brings his attention back to 'me'. The aura is still there but now anger and confusion are added in.

"What did you-"

"They're gone Buckyblower. Just like your relationship with Sta-" This time 'I'm' interrupted by Bucky shooting "me" in the eye. Ouch.

"Where. Are. The. Stones!" Steve demands sick of my trolling.

Now is the time for bullshiting.

"The stones have served their purpose, now they are mere atoms. But do not worry, I'm sure you can find them soon, IN HELL! SELF DESTRUCT!!!" The android states before exploding.

Those who were holding the Android took the explosion face first as there was no time to escape. But the others were still affected.

"What the hell just happened?" Bucky asked unsure. Especially as he looked at the metallic remains of 'Thanos'.

But before he could get a response he was blitzed by Outriders.

"Bucky!! No!!" Steve cried out in horror as The Winter Soldier was being beaten to death. There were no last words for Bucky, only pain, tears, and unrequited love.

Everyone else was busy fending off the swarm of Thanos' forces. Unlike the Battle of Wakanda they had no back up. They were alone against an unforgiving force of death. Just like I was.

—————————————————————

To explain what's going on I'll make it quick. No one likes flashbacks after all.

So basically this version of Thanos wasn't an idiot and knew that with all of the Avengers alive that they'd come after him. And of course the Mad Titan he may be, he still wanted to live. So he kept a communication device to the remains of his forces just in case. I'm really glad that they are still devoted to me.

So I had them come and pick me up. Then I had them leave a Life Model Decoy of myself on Titan II. Apparently Thanos had this technology for infiltration missions.

Who am I to complain about convenient space technology.

After the ThAndroid self destruct I had my ground forces pull a Blitzkrieg. Now I will finally have my revenge for my deaths.

—————————————————————

And here I am now. Standing in Thanos' capital ship, the Sanctuary II. With said ship leading a fleet of the most cutting edge warships in the galaxy.

"Sire, your plan worked brilliantly. What is our next course of action?" Random Grunt #211211435 asked.

"Rain fire on those fuckers. I want every ship we have to bombard the planet. To the point that even the planet itself is nothing more than a wasteland. Afterwards send out 5 legions of our best troops to incinerate any remains." I order. The grunt looks at me confused but my glare forced him back to work.

Why go through all of that. Well simply put I wasn't taking any chances at all. All of them had to die for my survival and even one of them could be a problem. From Strange, Thor, or Karen to Peter, Rocket, or even Mantis.

After that I'll go conquer the Earth because I wanted to pour a bag of salt on the Avengers. Plus to take care of anyone who'd come for revenge like Stark or Scott.

"MUHAHAHAHA! ha." I'm not very good at evil laughter. But I'm broken from my thoughts by an alarm. Of course she's alive.

"Focus all of our firepower and shoot that bitch to hell!" I order quickly. Strong as Carol maybe she couldn't possibly survive a bombardment from all of my ships.

She puts a valiant effort but she falls in five minutes. Although she took out only a couple of ships. But the lives of grunts don't really matter.

Two Hours Later

"Sire, I am positive that all life on and in that planet is gone. No being could possibly survive that, if they did then they'd be dead soon." Higher ranked Grunt tells me.

So I agree to leave. But I had five ships stay behind to continue the orbital bombardment.

Now on to Earth.

—————————————————————

Earth. Home sweet home. Now granted this wasn't my Earth but it was close enough. Now to conquer it to fulfill my new role as an Avenger, avenging myself. I'm a salty guy don't judge me.

However I noticed something strange. What might that be? The entire cast of the Avengers except they're in the suits from the Endgame trailer. This time includes Ant-Man and Iron Man. Oh god oh fuck.

"AVENGERS! assemble." Why would you shout and then whisper. That's just weird. But I can just hear the theme playing as they all get ready to kick my ass.

Perhaps with an army at my side things might change. Perhaps I won't die at the hands of the Avengers for the third time. Fuck yeah let's do-Who am I kidding I'm gonna die.

A Desperate Struggle But This Time It Was Cooler Because Of The Theme Song

Again I lost both arms. Why is this so common? But this time I got Hawkeye, Rocket, Mantis, and Spider-Man. Better than last time that's for sure.

Out of everyone I notice something frightening. I can't see Ant-Man anywhere.

Oh No. As I really didn't want to die by meme I started screaming and thrashing about. I actually break free and start running to the nearest escape pod. That was pretty easy. Unfortunately I can see why.

The best way to describe what I felt would be akin to a poop that continues to grow inside of you. Except that it has a breaking point in which you pop. VERY PAINFUL.

But look at the bright side. I actually killed the Avengers. And then they cheated by using time travel and plot hax. But at least I killed some of them.

—————————————————————

—————————————————————

What I've found on the internet was...surprising. It was appreciated that there are those that can agree with my plan. Although that is muddled with people jokingly believing. Perhaps I could use that to complete my goal.

I had a few discussions online with other people about this. Most of these were 'memes' but there were serious ones. I explained my point of view in clear detail. Some came to share my view and some were assured in their own. Of course there were those who called me a madman.

However during my travels on the internet I've heard mention of 'Endgame', the sequel to 'Infinity War'. I had to know what happened. To see the effect I have brought upon my home universe. Unfortunately I fear that it will be reversed.

3 Hours Later

That was……an experience. I could come to terms with dying on Titan II. I expected that some who were upset would come for revenge.

And I remember myself from the past. Such a brash and arrogant one I was, it was only through my struggle to complete the Infinity Gauntlet did I become who I was. I couldn't blame him for his attitude as his future was confirmed, destiny was a fickle mistress

However what angered me was the fact that they made Gamora's death meaningless. Balance was distorted. All of my struggles was for not.

But no matter. Balance can always be restored. And I'll start with them, Marvel Studios.