The weight of Samehada on his back feels at once like both a dream and a curse.

Looking down at the body of his mentor, Kisame finds himself void of the hatred and vicious delight that had fuelled his actions just moments ago. In its stead is a dull ache burning behind his ribs, a faint echo of the stabbing guilt that had once overtaken him the first time he'd killed his fellow shinobi. He can't bring himself to feel anything for Fuguki's death, can't even sort out any rational thought now that the feelings of betrayal and duty warring within his mind had been quieted, and he isn't sure if the silence is a blessing or an omen of the storm that is to come.

There's a sharp sting on his wrist. The sensation forces his eyes to dart away from the corpse of the man he once called 'teacher', instead fixing his gaze on his right hand. The arm guards he wears covers his skin, but he doesn't need to see what lies underneath the fabric to know what's there.

The compass on his wrist throbs, its needle spinning without end as it seeks the mirror of his soul. He can count on one hand the number of times that he's felt it ache like this over the years, and it's shocking enough to ground his mind back in the present.

He's killed his master. He's taken the legendary blade. Where can he go? What is there left for him to do?

Why is his soulmate hurt?

Before he can think twice, Kisame finds himself running, away from that hideout in the sewers where his former master had hidden himself from the eyes of the village. Away from where his body lies dead for the rats, or maybe to be found by some poor fool. He doesn't know- and he doesn't care. His soulmate has been hurt, and it gives him a sense of focus that he hadn't expected. Kisame doesn't allow himself a moment to think about what he's doing until he's perched upon one of the many stone buildings of Kiri, staring down at the village while Samehada stirs against his back in response to his agitation.

It's surreal, to finally hold the legendary sword and to know it is now his. He'd trained for years under Fuguki- he'd killed for him, never asking questions and never doubting his mentor- all for this moment, and yet he still feels nothing. He has nothing left.

He should have known better than to just do as he'd been told, blindly believing it would make sense along the way.

Another ache on his wrist, much less intense than the pain from earlier draws his attention back to his soul mark. This time, he reaches for his arm guard and pulls it off, reaffirming- with a slight sense of relief- that his compass is still outlined in black. A part of him always worries that it would someday fade to grey after one of these spikes of pain, try as he might to ignore the fear at the back of his mind.

His soul mark had always earned him a fair share of disdain from his peers and superiors, the compass being viewed as nothing more than a distraction and an unnecessary burden. Be it the physical or emotional distraction attached to it, soulmates were considered a weakness amongst shinobi- and yet, try as he might, Kisame could never truly come to hate the compass on his wrist. Be it during the war, or on his worst missions, and especially after he'd lost his family, he'd found an odd sense of comfort in watching the ever-spinning needle. The promise of someone out there bearing the mirror image of his mark had kept him grounded in a way he couldn't quite explain, and though he'd once been upset that his soulmate wasn't someone from his village, he eventually came to be grateful that they aren't. He's killed too many comrades to be anything but.

The moonlight barely shines through the perpetual mist enshrouding the village, but Kisame has never had problems seeing in the dark. This time, his gaze lingers on his wrist, once again finding the tension in his muscles easing somewhat as his thumb brushes along the delicate swirls of the compass. Amidst the chaos and turmoil of his mind, this tiny, insignificant thing somehow quells the cacophony of his thoughts long enough to give him a brief sense of peace. Long enough to make him think about where he has left to go from here.

The world is one of cruelty- deceit and betrayal litters its paths with almost no end in sight, and it robs him of every hope he's ever held close. This mark, however- this is the one thing that no one could take from him. This is something, someone, he has no reason to doubt. The one constant that is destined for him, and him alone.

They'd told him there was no need for things like emotion in this world. Seeking things like attachments, friendships- they were mere hindrances in the life of a Kirigakure shinobi. Mere obstacles to be removed for the sake of the village when commanded to. But as Kisame rises to his feet, still staring at the ever-spinning compass on his wrist, he begins to wonder if maybe there is more to that cold objective 'truth' than what he has been made to believe- just another lie the village invented to twist and control its shinobi like puppets on strings.

After all, what else are compasses made for, but to find?

With the blood of his teacher on his hands and the moon hanging over his head, Kisame slowly comes to a decision. Only the night sky and the shrouding mists serve as witness to his resolve- and with it, the tides of fate begin to shift.

rewind

To say that it is difficult to grow up knowing what the future holds would be a grand understatement. To know all of this because it had been recorded in the pages of a comic book from a past life, even more so.

With foresight comes perpetual fear, as well as a certain confidence and power that is difficult to relinquish once it has been grasped. Doing anything that would alter the course that has already been set is to give up control, and the difficulty of such actions are only made more complicated by a guilt that cannot be shaken. Seeing others afflicted by suffering and tragedy is one thing, but to have known it was coming and to do nothing about it for the sake of the greater good is a special suffering that no one else can sympathise with. To have only yourself to judge for every action and inaction, to know that even one good deed could end up damning the world- it's a war between morality and logic, one that never really ends.

It is a lonely burden, to know the fate of the world- and as luck would have it, that is exactly the life she has to lead. Because of course she wasn't allowed to even die peacefully.

Natsuki Hagiwara was born in the Land of Waves, the only child of its second leader and Ōnami, Ayano Hagiwara and her wife, Kaoru. In a neutral nation, miles away from any Hidden Villages and shielded from the worst of the wars across the ocean, it had taken her much longer than it should have to realise just what world she'd been born into. To acknowledge her rebirth that somehow kept her memories of her past life intact had already been hard enough- desolate wailing and utter frustration with her lot in life had been exhausting, and she'd made her new family's lives as miserable as she could during her first few months of existence. It had taken more time than she's proud to admit for her to realise it wasn't their fault she was like this, and to allow herself the energy to care for these people as her own blood, however different they may have been. Once she did, she had found them almost too easy to love, and she'd thought that she could perhaps learn to move on from the past.

Then she turned two, and she'd heard the word 'shinobi' whispered on the streets. When her mom points out a man wearing a headband with a stylised leaf to her in the marketplace, Natsuki is hit with the force of a hundred different memories crashing into her and demanding to be heard- blonde hair blue eyes whiskers demons ninja conspiracies death tragedy- resulting in her completely blacking out and fainting from the stress.

Her mom never really got over the shock of that incident, and Natsuki never saw that shinobi ever again- though she would later learn he'd been part of a team, hired to help escort some merchants into the Land of Fire from their port. It was a whole month before her family brought her out of the house again, and even then, Natsuki could no longer view her world with the same innocent eyes as she did before.

Whether she likes it or not, time waits for no one, even the people they've forced into living beyond their intended demise. And as with all things, Natsuki was forced to live with the facts presented to her. Getting over the loss of her previous life and loved ones had been hard- she will never be over that, not truly- but she took what she had known from her past life and put it to good use. She had to, if she wanted to survive- and by god, the craziest part is that she still did. Even after everything, she wanted to live.

So, she did what she did best. She listened, and she learned.

From how her parents talked about the ongoing situation with the major countries and the newspapers she'd slowly learned to read, she managed to learn she'd been born sometime during the Second War. Rumours of its end were being whispered among the civilians as the state of unrest slowly retreats from the Elemental Nations- only to be cast over them again in due time- and Natsuki can't help but feel relieved that she hadn't been born to one of the Hidden Villages. Though it made her stomach twist with guilt, she was decidedly content to merely stand aside and watch as the world went by on its messy, tragic, and yet ultimately happy course.

All things considered, she believed she'd gotten the better end of this reincarnation ordeal. A loving family, a home that's uninvolved in the war, nigh impossible odds of interfering with the preordained story- everything is as it should be.

There is one thing Natsuki hadn't accounted for, however. The story she knew had never once mentioned anything about compasses of fate and intertwined souls.

"Okaa-chan." Her mother, Ayano turns towards her at her call, her face softening as she meets her gaze over the papers she's been sorting through at her desk all day. The bored toddler sits innocuously on the floor of her play mat, her hands absently fiddling with wooden horse toy that one of her parents' friends had made for her. With a tilt of her head, she asks, "Why won't my compass stop spinning?"

Ayano hums thoughtfully for a moment, pushing aside a stray strand of hair that had somehow escaped the bun she'd tied at the base of her neck. Natsuki watches as the woman rises from her seat to make her way towards her, deep brown eyes reflecting her contemplation. The lack of surprise she displays is likely attributed to her having expected the inquiry, which in turn had been encouraged by Natsuki's own progress and understanding of the world around her.

Despite her youth, Natsuki had regained just about most, if not all of the cognitive abilities of her previous life sometime after her first year in this life. The bits and pieces that had made up the incomprehensible mess of her mind had slowly acclimatised to her new form, and with that came the incessant need to regain control and autonomy of her body. It was matter of pride, really, since it was indescribably embarrassing to be so dependent on others for the most basic of needs- and so, Natsuki had all but thrown herself into relearning the basics.

If her parents or grandfather ever noticed how quickly she'd learned to grasp words and stand on her feet compared to the others of her age, they simply attributed it to her being a fast learner. They were absolute champs like that, taking her progress in stride and answering any of her queries with minimal babying- though considering the league of actual prodigies in this universe, she shouldn't have been surprised.

"That just means that your soulmate is someplace very far from here, Nacchan." As her mother seats herself down on the mat, Natsuki willingly crawls over into her lap, earning a soft laugh from Ayano as she scoops her up with ease. Grown in mind though she may be, Natsuki had always been a bit of a cuddler, and there's something about her new mother's warmth that brings out the child in her. "The further away they are, the faster it spins. When they get closer, the needle will slow- until someday, if you're lucky, it will point the way to them."

A slight frown pulls at Natsuki's lips. She wants to formulate the right sentence to express herself, but she falls short, settling instead for, "But Tatsumi-kun doesn't have one."

It's one of the first things Natsuki had noticed about her closest playmate. Tatsumi Arikawa is the grandson of her mother's closest political aide, a five year-old equipped with all the brutish confidence childhood entails and a distinct lack of any compass on his wrist, spinning or otherwise. Besides his stupidly pretty green eyes, the latter had been the very first thing Natsuki had noticed the first time she'd met him before he'd tried to pull her hair and she returned in kind with a jab at his eye. She still didn't understand how they'd made up after that- one of the many mysteries of childhood innocence.

"Not everyone is born with a soul mark, Nacchan. That isn't a bad thing- it just means they might have different experiences than you will." There's a note of contemplation to Ayano's voice- it seems that she's trying to word this in a way she can understand. "Soulmates are a rare and precious thing, but we don't need them to live. Do you understand?"

"They're..." Ah, what's the word for 'luxuries' here? She'll just settle on a something a little easier. "Special?"

"Yes, they are." Her mother chuckles, the warm, rumbling sound resounding deep in her chest. Natsuki closes her eyes as she leans into the gentle vibrations- a part of her still aches for the family she's lost from before, but she cannot simply brush aside the love and warmth that radiates from this woman. "Somewhere out there, someone else has the same compass that you do. They're probably wondering about you right now, too."

Natsuki hums, silencing the cynic in her that wants to scoff. She'd done that the first time her grandfather told her what the compass on her wrist meant, and the frown on his face had made her feel horrible afterward. She still doesn't really buy into the whole idea of having a soulmate- it's a cute, fluffy concept, but in her mind that's still all it is. A concept. She entertains the notion anyway, though. "Did you ever dream about meeting Kaa-san?"

"When I was a girl, yes." Another laugh, this one tinged with a hint of embarrassment that makes even Natsuki smile. "I could never have expected someone like her, though."

Soulmates, as her Okaa-chan goes on to explain to her, aren't always meant to be your 'one true love'. They're supposed to be the complement to your soul, one who understands you so completely and utterly that there is simply no one else who can come close. Some people are born without a compass, and some have more than one, but ultimately the implication is the same. There will never be anyone else like the person that a soul compass leads you to.

"And that's how you met Kaa-san?"

"Yes." Ayano's fingers card through Natsuki's curls, the familiar sensation almost lulling her back into slumber. "I remember dropping all of my things and running straight to the eastern docks when my compass started pointing the way."

"Was she looking for you, too?" Natsuki asks, genuinely curious. She's never heard about how her parents met and she does want to know- but there's something else that's been bothering her. From the little hints she's managed to pick up- the timeline of things, her distinctly vibrant red locks, her grandfather and mom's intricate calligraphy scrolls- Natsuki can't help but feel a vague worry settle in the pits of her stomach. If she's right about this...

"Not at first." The snort that leaves Ayano's lips is without venom, but there's something distantly sad in her eyes. Her voice is quieter when she says, "You see Nacchan, your Kaa-san had to leave her home during the war. She was... very hurt when she first arrived here with your Jii-chan all those years ago. Her compass was the last thing on her mind back then."

"Oh." Natsuki feels her hands fisting slightly into the collar of Ayano's yukata, unable to hold back her curiosity. "Where was her old home?"

This time, her mother hesitates to reply. "I'm not sure if..."

"We came from Uzushiogakure, shōko*." A low, gravelly voice chimes in from the doorway, and Natsuki flinches- more out of instinct than genuine surprise- as she turns towards the new arrival. She hadn't heard anyone enter, and from the way her mother tenses up, she hadn't, either. The two of them relax almost immediately however, upon recognising the familiar face of her grandfather, who smiles at them with a twinkle in his eye that carries just a hint of mischief.

Natsuki ignores the way her stomach sinks at the confirmation of her theory. She's kind of known for a while now, anyway.

"Jii-chan, welcome home!" Natsuki pipes up, beaming up at her grandfather as her mother stands to welcome her father-in-law home from his work. The old man plants a kiss on Natsuki's forehead, making her giggle in delight- her grandfather's stubble always tickled incessantly, but she'd be lying if she says she doesn't love the attention. Being a cute baby has its perks.

"Hiroki-san, are you sure about this?" Ayano voices her question once the greetings are out of the way, her expression one of mild concern. Natsuki glances between the two adults from where she's held against her mother's hip, a tendril of worry snaking its way into her heart. Had she done something she shouldn't have by asking that question?

"She is one of us. She will have to know someday, for her own safety." Despite his solemn voice, there's something knowing in the depths of her grandfather's violet eyes that immediately has Natsuki feeling like she's been caught with her hand in the cookie jar. The corner of his lips quirks up slightly, and he brushes a finger against her cheek. "Besides, our Natsuki is smarter than she looks. I'm sure she understands how important it is that she keeps this a secret- don't you, shōko?"

Puffing up her cheeks, Natsuki wordlessly nods as she shoves her undoubtedly guilty-looking face into the crook of her mother's neck. All the while, her grandfather merely laughs pleasantly, as if he hasn't completely ousted her for poking dangerously close to what seems to be a taboo topic. Thankfully, she could merely play it off as her being a cheeky, if curious kid who just happened to ask whatever came to mind, instead of an impatient adult trying to pick at secrets before the right time.

For now, she'll just have to live with the embarrassment all of that entails until she's figured out just what she ought to do with this strange shot at life.

There's always been something different about her mom compared to Ayano. Where her mother's warmth is akin to a small, steady flame in the fireplace, her mom's aura reminds her of the cool touch of rain against her skin. When Kaoru holds her, Natsuki remembers arcs of light shining brightly through a sea of grey clouds, the scent of ozone on the horizon, the low rumble of rolling thunder. Her mom doesn't feel as warm as Ayano or Hiroki, but she feels just as safe in her arms- if not more so. If Ayano is a fire- feelings of home, love, laughter- Kaoru is the eye of a storm, a sanctuary of safety and control in the midst of uncertainty.

Natsuki is almost four years old when she realises that this feeling isn't just her waxing poetic. When her mom storms into her room, fingers moving through a series of seals before chains erupt from her back, she feels the explosion of lightning chakra like a spark in the air and thinks- oh .

She doesn't get to think much else when the chains spear through the rogue shinobi that had tried to steal her from her crib, only to end up activating the immobilising seals engraved into the woodwork- Natsuki hadn't even known they were there. It's hard to come up with any thought, really, when she hears the crunch of the bladed chains cutting clean through bone, the gurgled final breaths of the man wearing a hitai-ate bearing Kiri's symbol, and she can only stare as the life leaves his eyes.

It's only when her mother gathers her into her arms and pulls her far away from the bedroom, where her mom glares at the dead shinobi with a raw hatred she's never seen on her face before, that Natsuki finally passes out again.

Hiroki's chakra has been unusually calm compared to that of her parents'. Two weeks have passed since the trio from Kirigakure had tried to abduct her- apparently there were others with him that she hadn't seen, but they had been taken care of quickly by her mom and grandfather. From the hushed murmurs that her parents have tried to keep her from hearing, they speculated that it had been a last ditch attempt at getting their hands on more Uzumaki blood to help sustain their troops in the fight against Konoha, and the implications of their words are enough to plant a shard of ice within her heart. She'd known that other villages had destroyed Konoha's sister village out of fear of Her might, but she hadn't once considered the possibility of their villagers being taken prisoner to supplement the war effort. The memory of another Uzumaki who had been trained under Orochimaru comes to mind- a woman whose chakra had healing powers on par with or even beyond that of the great Tsunade- and the idea of others like her having been drained of their life force against their will is enough to make her ill.

Her parents do their best to act like everything's normal, carefully watching for any changes in her own behaviour to evaluate just how badly this incident has affected her. Their attempts at keeping her in the dark might have worked, were she a normal child- but she's not, and her sudden discovery of her ability to sense chakra has made it impossible not to notice changes in others' moods when she focuses. It reflects in the strength of their chakra, with sudden spikes that indicate agitation, worry or other distressing emotions. There has been a lot of that from her family as a whole, especially when they notice her moments of despondency, but ever since Hiroki had been tasked with watching over her after both her parents had to go back to their work, Natsuki has noticed just how little his chakra gives away with regards to his moods and thoughts.

Even now, as she toddles back towards him after playing on the swings- the playground is a good place to distract her from the quiet of her thoughts, what with the unrestrained surges of chakra from the other children and their constant chatter- she tries to focus on her grandfather's signature and finds it the same as always. His chakra feels like that of Ayano's, a warm hearth that burns steady and strong. His nature is fire, she's able to deduce, and like Kaoru, he has far greater reserves than her civilian mother.

"Jii-chan." Hiroki looks at Natsuki over the pages of the newspaper he's reading on the park bench- Natsuki wonders if he's a sensor as well, seeing as he isn't surprised by her approach nor has he really had to actively look for her while he does his daily reading. Hands balling up in the fabric of her shirt, she asks hesitantly, "Don't you have to go to work?"

"Not today, shōko." He raises an eyebrow at her- the same way her mom did that time when she'd caught Natsuki climbing the kitchen counter to get her own milk when she'd thought everyone else was asleep, amusement bubbling beneath the surface of those eyes as they watch her scramble to explain herself. "Already trying to chase me away? I thought you missed spending time with your grandpa."

"Of course I did!" Despite seeing the obvious bait, Natsuki finds herself retorting before she can think twice. Blushing, she twists her shirt even more between her hands and murmurs, "I just thought..."

"I know." Hiroki reaches for her hands, gently coaxing her to release her hold on the abused fabric. His palms are calloused and wrinkled with age, lined with faint scars that speak of age and battle beyond her understanding. As he carries her into his lap, newspaper pushed to the side and forgotten, he says, "You haven't been sleeping well, have you Natsuki?"

At his words, Natsuki flinches- but she doesn't answer. She's tried to be a good kid since she'd gotten old enough to walk, so that her guardians would never have to worry about their little girl who's too old for her body and bears memories of a family that no longer exist. She's always felt like she'd stolen something from these wonderful, kind people by being born the way she did, robbed them of a happy child with eyes that would gaze at the world in wonder and innocence and not- not like her. Not someone who has nightmares about demons and ancient gods with an eye in the sky and the deaths of people she's never met. To that end she'd done her best to play the part, laughing at the silly things they do and doing her best to make them smile and muffling her tears when she dreams of a world that already slipped through her fingers.

And if she now dreams of lifeless grey eyes and blood seeping into the floorboards while hands reach into her crib to drag her out- then that's no one's business but her own. She's tried doubly hard to keep them from worrying about her since the incident, especially when they now had to look into security measures despite the dwindling war. In hindsight, she should have guessed that her grandfather- wise beyond even her years, trained to notice even the slightest detail- would be the first to notice her restlessness.

"It's okay to tell me, shōko. I'm just worried about you- we all are." There's an edge of genuine softness to his voice now, and it only makes Natsuki feel worse. She hates that she's the reason for his concern- she doesn't deserve it- and so she takes a deep breath and dodges the question with a query of her own.

"Why were those men here?"

As she'd expected, Hiroki falls completely silent, but his arm tightens around her slightly in a protective reflex that makes her guilt weight heavily on her mind. There are a number of reasons why that shinobi had reached for her in that crib- blackmail, murder, kidnapping- and there's no way to tell which it is, because dead men cannot confess, and Kiri will never admit they had any part in trying to steal a child in their desperation to win this war. There's no way for Hiroki to tell her any of this when he's above lying to her just to put her at ease, and so the two of them merely sit there in silence, the afternoon sun hanging high in the sky and the air filled with the squeals and laughter of children running across the playground. Natsuki doesn't look at her grandfather, fixating instead on the swing set where two kids are now arguing over who gets to go next, and wishes she could have been more like them.

When her grandfather rises to his feet and bounces her on his arm, he says something that manages to catch her off-guard.

"Let's go a little off the usual track today, what do you say?" With a wink, he adds conspiratorially, "It'll be our secret, okay?"

He's trying to distract her, she knows, but Natsuki nods anyway. She may be mature beyond her years, but that doesn't stop her from being curious about this new world, filled with countless mysteries and new facets she has yet to uncover. Hands curling around her grandfather's neck, Natsuki watches in silence as her grandfather takes a different path from the one he normally uses to go back home. Instead of being greeted with more buildings, his feet carry him in the opposite direction of the residential area, leading them both out towards the farmlands further into the island.

Waves is much bigger than Natsuki remembers the anime making it out to be- besides the ports along their shores and the main town district, much of the island is comprised of both cultivated land and untouched forests. The island is segregated into several different sectors for easier management and reference, though she still isn't sure of the specifics. Besides the sprawling plains and hillsides that they've used to grow crops and breed livestock, she knows there are industrial sectors for managing the fisheries and forestry products, though she's never seen those areas on the other side of the island, or the south-eastern port either. It sometimes amazes her just how big this country is, when it's barely a speck on the map compared to the Elemental Nations- and yet, just how tightly interconnected their society is as a whole.

As Hiroki walks the paths running past the seemingly endless paddy field plains, countless people greet both him and Natsuki with a smile when they pass by. At one point a rickshaw driver on his bike even offers to give them a lift for free- a man whose son Hiroki had treated about a year ago, her grandfather explains. Even complete strangers she's never met in her life take a moment to say hello as she rides atop her grandfather's shoulders, to which she shyly waves back at them in return. Natsuki is positive just about everyone knows her for who she is as the Ōnami's daughter, but she doesn't miss the rare sneer or frown that a select few people throw her way. Waves may be a peaceful community, but even small societies aren't immune to the disease of discrimination- and the fact that Kaoru is a fairly recent immigrant to the country during a time of conflict doesn't exactly win the favour of every person here.

Try as she might to ignore the sting of hurt and anger that leaves... it's not something she intends to let slide forever.

Natsuki and her grandfather continue like that for a long time, venturing deeper inland past the farmlands as the number of people grow fewer and fewer, and she begins to wonder just where her grandfather is taking her.

"Jii-chan, aren't you tired from all the walking?"

"Not at all." Hiroki replies easily, before he slowly comes to a stop in the middle of an empty road. Natsuki looks around, only to be struck with more confusion as she takes note of where they are. There are a few stray chickens wandering around, but besides that there's nothing of note besides the trees of the forest beyond.

Natsuki glances at her grandfather, who cranes his head back to look at her with that familiar twinkle in his eye. As he slowly pries her off his shoulders and shifts her back into his arms, he says, "Don't worry, we're almost there."

And then, just before Natsuki can ask where he's going, he leaps high off the ground and right into the treeline. Natsuki clutches at his neck with all her might, shrieking in fear and unexpected delight whilst the world rushes by. For a moment, she's weightless with nothing but the firm grip her grandfather has on her keeping her grounded, the wind rushing through her hair and only the sky and empty space around her.

Then her grandfather lands solidly on a tree branch that barely quivers under his weight, and the world is suddenly stable again.

"Sorry. Did I scare you, shōko?" Despite the question, there's obvious amusement in his voice, and Natsuki levels a half-hearted glare at her grandfather. The attempt only lasts a second, however, before she cracks a small smile, betraying the exhilaration that sets her heart fluttering in her chest

"It was like flying." Her words come out in a nearly breathless murmur, an almost anxious anticipation flooding her voice as she says, "Are we doing it again?"

"Well, good to see someone's enjoying herself." Hiroki laughs, his chakra circling pleasantly within his core and conveying his genuine joy. It's the closest thing Natsuki has felt to a genuine betrayal of his emotion from his aura, sans the barest flicker of fire that had quickly been squashed down to almost nothing on the day he'd come back after her attempted kidnapping. As he steadies his grip on her again, he says, "Come on, I've a few more tricks to show you."

As her grandfather hops from tree to tree, Natsuki keeps her head low and peers over his shoulder, quietly in awe of just how quickly everything flies by. The rainforests of Waves are densely packed with all sorts of hardwood trees, supplying more than enough footholds for Hiroki to navigate through the treeline. There's a decent amount of sunlight filtering through the leaves, the shadows of the trees making them look almost like stars in daylight through the dense canopy as they travel past, and Natsuki finds herself staring in fascination at just how beautiful all of it looks from here. She'd never been an avid camper or outdoors sort of person in her previous life, but seeing nature like this- untouched and reaching for the sky with towering branches and lofty evergreens- leaves her a little star-struck by the magnificence of it all.

Her grandfather's display of shinobi navigation skills is almost dull in comparison. Just almost.

When they finally begin to slow down and descend the branches, they're standing in a small clearing next to a wide riverbank, surrounded by trees on all sides. Natsuki glances around, intrigued- she isn't sure which of Waves' countless rivers this is, but the water runs almost crystal clear and she swears she can see the shadows of fish swimming through the currents. She isn't sure how her grandfather managed to find such a picturesque location so deep into the forest, but when he lowers her to the ground, Natsuki looks up and sees an unexpectedly serious look on his face.

"Do you remember when I explained to you what chakra is, Natsuki?" Eyes widening slightly at the question, Natsuki quickly bobs her head in affirmation. "Good. Today, I'm going to teach you how to use it."

"Really?" Her incredulous question comes out as a whisper, and Hiroki's lips momentarily twitch in amusement before his expression grows solemn once more.

"The shinobi arts are not something to be taken lightly, shōko. What I am about to teach you could be dangerous if you attempt it without supervision. You must never experiment with your chakra on your own- and above all, you must not tell anyone that you are practising with it. Are we clear?"

Natsuki swallows lightly at the gravity in her grandfather's usually cheerful voice. Were she a regular child, this might have flown over her head- but she isn't, and from the way her grandfather looks at her expectantly with those deep mauve eyes, she knows that heknows she's quicker on the uptake than she sometimes pretends to be. "I understand, Jii-chan."

"Pinky promise?" His voice suddenly lightens again, and he extends his pinky finger towards her meaningfully. Natsuki holds back a giggle as she hooks her own finger over his, shaking it with a firm grasp.

"I promise." With that affirmation, Hiroki fondly ruffles her hair and draws out yet another peal of laughter from her, before he makes his way towards the trees. Trailing behind him, Natsuki watches as he picks up several fallen leaves from the ground- a memory comes to mind, one of a blonde child wearing a severe look of concentration on his face as he sticks a leaf to his forehead- and begins to put the pieces together.

She hadn't planned on becoming a ninja, or anything of the sort- but it wouldn't hurt to learn a few neat tricks, right?

"Now, then." Hiroki settles on the forest floor and she follows suit, before he presses several of the leaves he'd gathered into her hands. When he lifts his hand from hers, one of the leaves is sticking effortlessly to the centre of his palm. "Here's what I want you to do. First, concentrate on feeling your chakra gathering in your stomach…"

Natsuki peers out from behind the big rock she's hidden behind, heart pounding in anticipation as her eyes rove over the seemingly empty beach between her and her target. Crouching down until the shallow waters of the receding tide brush against her knees, she's careful not to make any splashes before she reaches the drier sandbank and makes a break for the next rock formation. Diving behind it, she cushions her landing with her hands and pauses, her breaths slow and shallow while she listens for any sign of movement nearby. Reaching out with her chakra, she detects only the single bright glow of her target in her mind's eye, staunchly ignoring the significantly smaller signatures at her feet and all over the beach. She's looking for something else, something bigger and more dangerous and it's right behind her.

" Got you ."

Natsuki squeaks and scrambles to her feet, a last-ditch attempt at losing her chaser that is ultimately for naught, as Kaoru sweeps her into her arms and her fingers immediately dig into her sides.

"Alas, I have captured the great sea monster! Now I shall save my crew from her treacherous claws!" Kaoru declares with all the melodrama she can muster, Natsuki squirming in her tickling hands to no avail. Squealing with laughter, Natsuki struggles to escape her mom's dastardly attacks as she flails her arms and legs helplessly.

"Lemme go!"

"Never!" Kaoru declares, before she leans in and blows a raspberry against her neck. Natsuki's laughter grows even louder, squirming and thrashing as she tries to free herself from the onslaught.

"Stop, stop!"

"Alright, you two. That's enough." Natsuki startles at the sudden interruption, both her and Kaoru pausing to look up at Ayano, who had left her spot on the beach and was now standing in front of them. With a fond smile, she says, "You both fought valiantly- the battle was hard-won indeed. Now, let's return to shore for a well-deserved break."

Neither Natsuki nor her mom protest against that, and so they all make their way back to where they'd laid out their little picnic mat. This side of the island is rather quiet compared to the main beach closer to town- a nice secluded area where her parents have made it a habit to hold their semi-annual beach picnics. They'd long since finished the contents of the lunch they'd packed for this little beach day, and so Natsuki plops herself down on her corner of the mat to dry herself off. Kaoru takes the liberty of helping her comb out her hair, taking extra care to untangle out the loose curls before the salt water dries and leaves the strands stiff and matted.

Once they'd gotten that sorted out, Natsuki finds herself wrapped in a towel and curled up against Kaoru's chest, unconsciously reaching out to sense the gentle thrum of her mom's lightning chakra. It's a low, pleasant buzz that reflects her relaxed mood, and Ayano's smaller, flickering chakra is similarly flowing through her coils at a slow pace. Her mother is pressed up against Kaoru's side, and between both of her parents, Natsuki feels safe and at ease.

Amidst the peaceful silence, Natsuki doesn't expect to hear the words that leave her mom's lips.

"I was a shinobi once, a long time ago."

Natsuki had almost fallen asleep, lulled to slumber by the sound of her mom's steady heartbeat, before her quiet admittance quickly rouses her once again. Her mom's eyes are clouded as she gazes out at the ocean, her thumb absently rubbing circles against Natsuki's arm as she cradles her close. Her voice is soft, bearing a distinct undercurrent of melancholy as she asks, "Your grandfather told you where we came from, do you remember?"

"He said you lived in Uzushiogakure."

"Yes." A sad smile picks at the corner of her lip momentarily before it falls short. "It was a beautiful place. Smaller than Waves, but everyone there was always good to each other. We all treated our friends and neighbours as if we were one big family." Her voice catches slightly towards the end of her sentence, but her brief lapse in control is amended as quickly as it happened. "You would have loved it, Natsuki- the ocean was so blue and clear that you could see almost everything beneath you as you swam."

"Were there crabs?" Natsuki asks immediately. Most of Waves' coastlines consisted of silt and mud instead of sand, and with that territory came plenty of the annoying crustaceans. This remote little cove they're at is one of the rare exceptions to the norm, and it's the only place besides the main beach that Natsuki's willing to swim in.

"Plenty of them- but just as many fish." Both Kaoru and Ayano sound like they're barely holding back their laughter after the face Natsuki pulls at the former's initial answer. The amusement in her mom's tone belies an undertone of wistfulness as she combs her fingers through Natsuki's hair, sighing. "I wish you could have seen it. I could have shown you all the secret places on the island where my Onii-chan and I would play."

A million questions come to mind as silence fills the air once again- her mom's never been a woman of many words, but there's something particularly solemn about this quietude. Natsuki hesitates to give voice to any of her inquiries, knowing that they will open a dam of hurt and painful memories that she has no right to pry at, but a part of her demands that she has the right to know. She cannot keep making guesses at things- not if her life is on the line, and not if she wants to know just how much is the same and what's different about the world she lives in compared to what she remembers.

"Why can't I tell anyone where we came from?" Natsuki asks, pulling her towel tighter around her shoulders. "Is it the same reason why those men tried to take me?"

"Oh, Natsuki." The way Kaoru's voice breaks as she murmurs her name strikes her like a knife to the chest. As her mom gathers her in her arms and hugs her close, Natsuki feels almost unworthy of the love and concern this woman has for her- not after she'd said these words knowing what they'd do. "I'm so, so sorry."

"It's not Kaa-san's fault," Natsuki protests, but her voice is weak. Even Ayano is silent as she puts an arm around Kaoru, her expression grave. It takes a moment for Kaoru to pull herself together long enough to look Natsuki in the eye- and when she does, Natsuki is startled to see the determination on her face

"Natsuki, you must listen to me very closely." Kaoru's voice is soft, nearly a whisper, but is in no way lacking urgency. Her eyes flit around the area, as if she's afraid someone will overhear, and Natsuki suddenly realises just how big a deal all of this truly is. "Your Jii-chan and I, we left to protect ourselves when enemies came to destroy our village. We had to go into hiding, and... we lost many of our friends and family when that happened."

Kaoru's violet eyes are hard as she meets Natsuki's gaze, and she says, "But there are people who are still doing everything they can to hurt us if they find us. Those nuke-nin who broke into our home, they were the same."

"But... why?" And how did he know to seek her out, if their status is supposed to be a secret? Something about this doesn't add up, and Natsuki feels ill as her mind conjures up an image of a man with bandages covering half his body and an arm implanted with stolen eyes.

"We were part of a very special clan, Natsuki. The biggest in all of Uzushio." Her mom gently grasps a lock of Natsuki's hair between her fingers, her eyes distant as she gazes upon the vibrant crimson that is familiar to her in a way Natsuki can't begin to understand. "They're afraid of what we can do- and some of them want our power for themselves. That is why your Jii-chan and I can never openly expose ourselves as shinobi, do you understand?"

"But Jii-chan works at the hospital. And you work with the police force."

"There are things we can do without using ninjutsu, you know." Kaoru's lips curve into a small smile. "The people here are good to us. Some of them are... wary, but they won't sell us out to the enemy. Not now that we've proven our loyalty to them."

"That's not very nice." Natsuki frowns, remembering the dirty looks some people had thrown her way whenever she went out with her grandfather or mom. One lifetime of seeing discrimination rear its ugly head had made her opinions on such things rather firm. "You shouldn't have to prove anything. Everyone here came from elsewhere, too."

"Someone's been paying attention to her history books, I see." Kaoru comments lightly, before she gives a small sigh. "It's complicated, Natsuki. I'm sure you understand, but there are some things that are difficult to change. People's perceptions are just one of them."

"It's not fair."

"It seldom is." Here, Kaoru frees one hand to entwine it with Ayano's, and the look she gives her is at once soft and filled with pride. "But that's what your Okaa-san is fighting so hard to do- to make this place better, and the people with it. It's hard work, and not everyone agrees with what she does, but someday things will be better- for everyone here today, and the future to come."

The future, huh? Images of a slimy, cruel businessman who had robbed Waves blind and killed countless innocents in his quest for wealth came to mind, and Natsuki clenches her hands tighter in the folds of her towel. The fictional story from the past had never mentioned anything about the governing system of Waves, but for the country to have been completely taken over and thrust into decline, something must have happened to the leaders of the country as well. Whether they were killed or simply forced into silence- she doesn't know. And that uncertainty makes her uneasy, because who is to say things will even go the same way as the 'canon' she once knew, if the role of Ōnami didn't exist then?

Natsuki looks at the spinning compass on her wrist, and then at her parents' intertwined hands, where their compasses point right at each other without even the slightest sway. If it weren't for these soul marks, would her parents have ever met at all?

What if, in that original timeline, the only reason there had been no mention of Natsuki Hagiwara was because she had never existed?

"Kaa-san." Natsuki determinedly chases away the noisy thoughts that come unbidden into her head, starting a new topic to break the silence. When Kaoru looks down at her, she asks, "What was it like when you met Okaa-chan?"

At first, her mom blinks, clearly having not expected the question. And then a smile breaks out across her face, violet eyes suddenly filled with such genuine warmth as she looks at her wife that even Natsuki finds herself stunned. Thumb brushing over Ayano's hand, she says, "Well, it was really quite unexpected. She was more beautiful than I dared to dream of- I was rendered quite speechless when I first saw her."

Ayano rolls her eyes, even as a pretty blush creeps along her cheekbones and up along her ears. Swatting Kaoru's shoulder with her free hand, she mutters, "Oh, please. I was knee deep in paperwork at the time and hadn't washed my hair in days."

"I meant what I said," Kaoru retorts easily, a cheeky smile on her face that is nearly identical to that of Hiroki's. Ayano's blush grows even darker, but she affectionately bumps her arm against Kaoru's shoulder nonetheless. Natsuki watches the interaction and can almost feel her heart melting in her chest, a small smile lingering on her face.

"Did you know that you know that you would love Okaa-chan when you saw her?" She asks, a tinge of genuine curiosity in her voice. She still wonders just how this soulmate thing works- if there's just that instant spark of chemistry between complementary souls, or a deep-rooted recognition and draw to one another that just feels right when they finally meet. Kaoru seems to think over the question for a moment before she speaks up.

"I think a part of me always did. It was how that love grew that surprised me."

"Was I a surprise, too?"

A startled laugh escapes Ayano's throat, whereas Kaoru's face turns a bright red while she makes a strange, spluttering sound that's caught between amusement and embarrassment. It takes a lot for Natsuki to keep a straight face- she could always count on unexpected adult humour to make her parents crack up.

"A bit, perhaps." Ayano chimes in, saving Kaoru the embarrassment of trying to sort out her words. Pulling Natsuki into a hug, her mother nuzzles her face against her head and says, "But we always knew we would love you- and we were right. Neither of us would trade what we have for the world.

Natsuki doesn't have the words to respond to that- she merely wraps her own arms around her mother and holds her close, feeling a swell of affection in her chest for this family that she never thought she could even begin to muster. Kaoru joins in the hug not long after, and Natsuki allows herself a moment to just forget about the worries of the future and the world around her. In that moment, she's content with this life that she has, and she can almost believe that everything will be okay.

"Did your Okaa-chan tell you how she scolded me for almost missing her, and then demanded that I take a bath before I could reply?" Kaoru suddenly says.

"Really? Did you stink?"

"Like a heap of old fish," Ayano affirms.

"Eww." Natsuki wrinkles her nose, and both her parents laugh quietly as they huddle together in their little corner of the world and watch the sun set.

Though she doesn't know exactly how and when, Natsuki remembers dying fairly young. While old enough to have been an adult, her life experiences had still been lacking in most areas. She doesn't know what it was like to love someone the way Kaoru and Ayano love each other- in their tender gazes, the brushing of hands, the soft kisses they shared when they thought she wasn't looking. She doesn't understand the mixture of melancholy and joy in her grandfather's eyes whenever he sees his daughter and her wife together, his fingers brushing against the grey outline of his own compass, frozen in time and a needle forever pointing northwards. There's a connection between the souls linked by the compasses of fate, but she can't even begin to imagine knowing what that feels like.

Natsuki glances again at the soul compass on her wrist, the needle spinning on its eternally unbalanced axis, and she wonders if she ever will.

* shoko: little tiger

AN: yes this was cross posted from ao3 i recognise the irony in this. If yall are followers of mine from way back when i started on here, what is UP i am not dead i'm just acclimatising to ao3, and i have not abandoned anything else I've left up here

In regards to this story, well. This is extremely self-indulgent. That's really the only excuse I have. "Why a soulmate au" you may ask, and the only answer is because I am hungry and I make my own content. The premise of the soulmate compass AU is inspired greatly by the work 'Cynically Yours' by MM_Mendell, which is where I first discovered this particular concept and decided to look more into it. Do check them out, I absolutely adore their take on the concept!

Story-wise, this fic dabbles in some worldbuilding and politics, and I'll dedicate a couple of chapters to laying the premise before we leap into the driving plot of the story. Besides that, I'm really all here for some good ol fashioned shameless fluff because I miss kisame and the sharkman deserves smooches.