author's notes: There is no money being made off of this. No infringement is intended. I only wanted to play in the playground that was created for us all by Bellisario and Company. All recognizable characters belong to them anyway. The songs used in this story are Gone by N'SYNC and One Year of Love by QUEEN. Thanks to everyone if you review this, they really make this all worth while. I appreciate them whether they are good or bad, but the flames really hurt. Luckily since I started writing JAG fics there haven't been any flames. I guess that means JAG fans tend to be a nicer bunch of people.
This is a DEFINITE AU fic. This is my idea of what could have happened if Mic and Mac had married,, don't hate me just PLEASE read and review...
As always, please enjoy this as much as I have, and don't forget to read and review.
Always,
CapriceAnn Hedican-Kocur
0800 ZULU
Royal Suites Hotel
Sydney, Australia
There's a thousand words that I could say
To make you come home yeah
Oh, seems so long ago you walked away and left me alone
and I remember what you said to me
You were acting so strange (mmmm)
and maybe I was too blind to see
That you needed a change
Was it something I said
To make you turn away?
To make you walk out and leave me cold (ooooh)
If I could just find a way
To make it so that you were right here
Right now..
I turned the radio on, and it all came flooding back to me; all the pain of the last two years. The fact that I had royally screwed up, and had let my love walk away and marry another. All because of my misguided attempt to make her happy.
I've been sitting here
Can't get you off my mind
(Can't get you off my mind)
I've tried my best to be a man and be strong
I've drove myself insane
Wishing I could touch your face
(touch your face)
But the truth remains..
You're gone..
You're gone.. (baby you're gone)
Baby you're gone
Girl you're gone, baby girl, you're gone..
You're gone..
You're...
Now I don't wanna make excuses, baby
Won't change the fact that you're gone, no, no
But if there's something that I could do
Won't you please let me know?
The time is passing so slowly now
Guess that's my life without you
(guess that's my life without you)
and maybe I could change my every day (yeah)
But baby I don't want to
But, of course, why wouldn't this song remind me of her? Why wouldn't every little thing surrounding me right now remind me of her? I was here in Australia where she had moved to be with her husband. Of course, I was thinking of her. Her and our final night together were on my mind. The night that no one knew anything about or even had any suspicions had finally happened. That long ago night after her engagement party will always haunt me, and remind me of what I gave up and let walk out of my life for good.
So I'll just hang around
and find some things to do
To take my mind off missing you
(take my mind off missing you)
and I know in my heart
You can't say that you don't love me too
Please say you do
Yeeaah....
I've been sitting here
(sitting here)
Can't get you off my mind
(get you off of my mind)
I've tried my best to be a man and be strong
(My best to be a man and be strong)
I drove myself insane
Wishing I could touch your face
(wishing I could touch your face)
But the truth remains
(but the truth your)
You're gone..
You're gone..
You're gone
You're gone...you're gone.. you're....
Gone
Ohhh...
What will I do
If I can't be with you
Tell me where will I turn to
Baby who will I be
Now that we are apart
Am I still in your heart?
Baby why don't you see?
That I need you here with me
Oohhh...
I've been sitting here (sittin' here)
Can't get you off my mind (can't get you off of my mind)
I've tried my best to be a man and be strong
I've drove myself insane
Wishing I could touch your face
But the truth remains
(the truth remains you're gone)
I been sitting here (sittin' here)
Can't get you off my mind (can't get you off of my mind)
I've tried my best to be a man and be strong
(my best to be a man)
I drove myself insane
Wishing I could touch your face
But the truth remains
You're gone..
You're gone..
You're gone You're gone
Gone
You're gone..
But the truth remains
You're....
0830 ZULU
Royal Suites Hotel
Sydney, Australia
By now I was dressed and heading out to meet my Australian counterpart to go over the details for the next round of the Officer Exchange Program. A driver was waiting for me to take me to the base where out meeting was to take place. But even in this car it seems that the radio gods were against me.
Just one year of love
Is better than a lifetime alone,
One sentimental moment in your arms
Is like a shooting star right through my heart.
It's always a rainy day without you,
I'm a prisoner of love inside you,
I'm falling apart all around you - yeah.
My heart cries out to your heart,
I'm lonely but you can save me, My hand reaches out for your hand,
I'm cold but you light the fire in me,
My lips search for your lips,
I'm hungry for your touch,
There's so much left unspoken
And all I can do is surrender
To the moment just surrender.
And no one ever told me that love would hurt so much,
Oooh yes it hurts,
And pain is so close to pleasure,
And all I can do is surrender to your love,
Just surrender to your love.
Just one year of love,
Is better than a lifetime alone,
One sentimental moment in your arms,
Is like a shooting star right through my heart,
It's always a rainy day without you,
I'm a prisoner of love inside you,
I'm falling apart all around you,
And all I can do is surrender.
0850 ZULU
RAN Offices
Sydney, Australia
In the twenty minutes it took us to wind our way through the city streets to get to the base no less than three more songs reminded me of her. And even now, as I am waiting in my counterpart's office waiting for him, I am wondering if I will see her sometime soon. That is when I heard a voice I hadn't thought I would hear ever again.
"Rabb! I didn't think it would be you they would send to these meetings." Mic Brumby exclaimed.
Bugme, I mumble under my breath, but to him I say, "Mic! I too can say I sure wasn't expecting to see you either. How are you doing?"
"Fine, I'm fine. And you? I see you have been promoted to captain. How's Renee?" Mic asked politely.
"I'm fine, and Renee and I broke up not long after you moved back to Australia. She's married now and expecting her first child. How's Sarah?" There I had finally said her name.
"Sarah's doing just fine. But I recently filed for divorce and moved out of our house, so I haven't seen her in a few days." I was floored by his statement.
"Divorce Mic? I am truly sorry, I know how much she loved you. What happened if you don't mind me asking?" I cautiously asked.
"To be quite honest, Rabb, I fell in love with my secretary right after Sarah and I moved here. And we have been having an affair ever since. I am giving Sarah just about everything she wants in our divorce, except one thing, so she is not even contesting it or trying to fight it." He callously remarked, and it was all I could do to keep myself for launching across the desk and pummeling him.
So instead I quietly directed the conversation back to the task at hand, and we quickly finished our meeting. After the meeting I left the office, and directed the driver to take me to the nearest car rental agency. I didn't want him reporting back to anyone where I was going.
1000 ZULU
Brumby Residence
Sydney, Australia
Once in the rental car I again turned on the radio, but it seems this time the radio gods were smiling on me. There was nothing on besides a couple of news programs and a couple of sports programs. It took me almost an hour to find the house I was looking for. And when I did find it, I waited outside for several minutes, just trying to screw my courage up enough to go for it. Rabb, kick your six into gear, and get up to that door. Sarah needs you now more than ever. With that last thought I got out of my car and walked the short distance to her door and knocked. She answered the door looking every bit as beautiful as I remember her being.
"Harm? Is it really you?" She asked as she opened the screen door to let me in. "Mic had said you didn't care anymore. Why are you here?"
"Sarah, it's me. It really is, I promise. You are my best friend, so why would I quit caring for you? I'm sorry about how everything has turned out. And I am sorry I wasn't there for the wedding. If I had been I probably would have stopped it." I slowly told her how I was feeling.
"I wish you would have, stopped me, I mean. Everything would be so different now. I wouldn't be getting a divorce, and I wouldn't be being forced to stay in a country that is not my own because of a lie I told my husband almost two years ago." Sarah stated.
"Mic told me about the divorce, and I am sorry, truly sorry. But what lie could I have prevented?" I asked her.
"The one about my little boy being his." I sat there stunned because I knew what the implication was. Sarah continued, "I knew when I said 'I do' that I was pregnant, and it wasn't Mic's baby. Before you say anything, yes he is your son, but Mic doesn't know. Which is why I have agreed, so far at least, to stay in Australia, until I can figure out a way to tell Mic, without it endangering my custody case. I have nothing on him to prove to the courts that he was the one who cheated. Mic was gone on a Training Mission when the baby was born, so he doesn't really know that his name is not even on the birth certificate."
"I have a son? Can I see him?" I barely manage to whisper.
"He should be awake now." Sarah states. And as if on cue I hear a baby crying. I get up and follow the sound down the hall. I get to the room, and carefully walk up to the baby bed. It is then I hear the most perfect voice in the world.
"Dada." He says standing up in his bed reaching for me.
I pick him up and hug him to me. "I love you." I whisper to him."I love you and your mother more than anything, and I am not leaving here without both of you."
"I didn't think you would." Sarah says from behind us. "But don't you think I should introduce you first before we sneak back to the States."
I nod and give her my patented flyboy smile. "I think that would be best too."
Sarah walks up to the two of us and puts her arms around both of us. "Harmon David Rabb Jr I would like to introduce you to our son, Harmon David Rabb III, or as Mic knows him, little David. Like I said, Mic doesn't know what is on his birth certificate, and you were the only one I had made love to in the months before my wedding, and Mic was never any good at math. I think he might suspect, but he hasn't said anything so far. When is your flight back home?"
"It's the day after tomorrow. Will you be able to be ready to leave by then?" I just took it to be a matter of fact that she would be leaving with me.
"I am ready to leave now. I have both of our passports, and since Mic moved out, I was able to pack up things that I really wanted to take with me and little Hammer, as I call him, without him noticing. Would it be possible to leave now?" She asked only half joking.
"It would be better if we did wait. And I think I know how you can get Mic to relent on his requirement that you stay here with little Hammer after your divorce. He gave me a little scoop while I was at his office earlier." I said.
"Really? What did he tell you?" Sarah asked me.
"Quite frankly, he told me that he has been having an affair with his secretary since shortly after you two moved here." As I said it I realized that Mic really was too arrogant for his own good. Did he really think I wouldn't have gone running straight to Sarah and given her the means to leave for home with our son. And then I realized, that it was exactly what he had intended to do. "It just occurred to me that maybe this is his way of giving you an out. A way home without a fight. I think he told me about the affair so you would find out and confront him."
"You may be right Harm. I have always suspected something was going on between them. Let's get my stuff sent home, and then we can go confront Mic." With that Sarah and I packed the last few things she wanted, and then we called a moving company to come and get the stuff to ship it back to the States tomorrow.
1530 ZULU
RAN Offices
Sydney, Australia
After the call was finished we went to see Mic, and let him know about everything. He took it better than I had expected.
"I always knew David, I guess his real name is Harm, wasn't mine. I knew about the night after the engagement party. I saw you two together. But when Sarah married me and you didn't stop it I thought everything would be fine. However, when Sarah tuned up pregnant, and I just knew he wasn't mine, I lost all hope in our marriage. And when Cynthia, my secretary, started showing an interest in me, I went for it and her. I guess, the rest you could say, is history." Mic stated calmly, and then turned to Sarah. "I know you want to leave tomorrow with Rabb. Please go, and take little Harm with you. I won't fight you on this one." With that he got up from his desk and left the room. When he didn't immediately come back, we left as well.
So should I continue? PLEASE let me know. Just click go on that little box on the lower left hand corner that says submit review, and do just that....THANKS!
CapriceAnn Hedican-Kocur