Old summary: Being a Jedi is one thing and so is being a Sith. Jedi are good and Sith are evil. There's no in between or compromise. But then a very special Jedi apprentice meets an unique Sith.
A/N: This is a WIP and it's not beta read.
Forewarning, this is like a side project that I've been (what's the writing form of doodle?) messing around with for fun. I have had drafts of the first couple of chapters on my computer for like two years now. I will finish this... at some point... in the future... a far, far away future... I'm a slow writer okay. But posting unfinished things usually, not always, gets me to finish them slightly faster.
Also English ain't my first language and I'm alone, got no beta, or anyone.
(I might finish this quickly. Or not. I really don't know. Sometimes it can take me month to write a couple hundred words then only an hour to write a couple of thousand. I am incredibly inconsistent. The only thing I'm consistent in is in my inconsistency. ;n;)
Keeping close to the wall Deadpool sneakily tiptoes in pace with his humming. "Dah dah dah dum da da dum da da..."
-Pssshhew-
Hearing the familiar noise of lightsaber igniting behind him, Deadpool stops dead in his tracks.
A second later a voice joins the electrical hum behind him. "Tip: If you're trying to sneak don't hum the Imperial march."
"What?" Frowning it takes a moment before he fully register the significant of what he's just been told. Back stiffening, his eyes widens. "Wait!" Whirling around he meets the startled eyes of an apprentice. "That's an actually thing? It's not only the movie's soundtrack playing in my head?"
"What? I, no?.. I, I mean yes?" Taken aback the young apprentice don't really know how to react and defaults with nonsensical rambling. "You guys like play it constantly. Way to catchy by the way. I keep humming it to myself. The other apprentices think I'm a Sith. Jameson won't shut up about it."
Yellow eyes shining with excitement the Sith ignores the lightsaber pointed at him and steps closer. "It's played constantly? Like when? Parades? Are there balloons? Is Snoopy one of them?"
Readjusting the grip on his lightsaber Peter resists the urge to back away from the odd Sith. "Ehhh. Sorry, no balloons."
Shoulders drooping the Sith looks up at him with large questioning eyes. "No, Big Bird?"
"Uh-uh." Shaking his head Peter wonders if the Sith is all as he should in the head.
Looking away in disappointment the Sith pouts and whines. "Aww, shoot. "
Sighing he glances at the kid. "Well, then." Suddenly the solemn look is replaced by a bordering manic smile and he quickly grabs his katana style lightsabers and hits the kid's hand with the butt of the handle. First we make him drop his lightsaber and then to... Wait a second? "Huh?" Mouth gaping he watches the kid flip the lightsaber back into his hand and point it back at him.
Eyes sparkling with amusement, the apprentice smirks and winks at him. "I have a lanyard."
"Clever boy." Eyes narrowed he inspect the kid's face. More of a young adult really. With really nice eyes and smile. Eyes wandering down he glimpses the lean outline of the apprentice body under the oversized robes. Not to mention... Shaking his head to stop that trail of thought, he instead lets his eyes drop down to the handles of the lightkatanas in his hands.
Smiling ruefully Deadpool meets Peter's eyes. "I'd hope I wouldn't need to do this to you, baby-Jedi. You seem fun." Dropping down on a knee he quickly crosses his katana style lightsabers and swiftly swipes them outwards to cut the ki-, Young adult's, hand off, only for the plasma to snuff out.
Huh? Stunned Deadpool stares down in disbelief at his weapons.
Confused he looks between the apprentice and his lightkatanas. "How did you do that?"
Keeping his lightsaber pointed at the Sith, Peter looks down at him, a self-satisfied smile playing on his lips. "Cortosis covered wrist cuffs. Never leave home without them."
Eyes flickering to the apprentice wrists then back up to his face, Deadpool tilts his head, managing to look even more confused.
Smiling widely Peter is more than happy to talk about one of his designs with someone. "When the lightsaber's plasma comes in contact with the cortosis a feedback is caused which runs through the system and shuts the whole thing down."
Staring up at Peter, Deadpool smiles dopeyidly. "He's got beauty and brains."
Brow furrowing Peter looks at the Sith in confusion. "What?"
Shaking his head Deadpool gives him a wide innocent smile. "Nothing."
Trying to look nonchalant, Deadpool casually looks between the apprentice and their lightsaber. "So what you gonna do with me?"
Unsure Peter in his turn looks between his lightsaber and the Sith. "Ehh?"
Grinning widely Deadpool waggles his eyebrows. "Want some suggestions?"
Frowning, heat rises to Peter cheeks and he looks away in annoyance. "Just be quiet."
Out of the corner of his eye Peter sees the Sith open his mouth and he quickly adds a pleading, "Please?" to his request.
Snapping his mouth shut Deadpool presses his lips tightly shut. He has manners after all.
But when his eyes once more drop down to the young man's wrist he just can't resist asking, "Where did you get the idea of the lanyard?"
"Huh?" Snapping out of his reverie Peter looks down at his wrist too. "Oh, everyone keeps getting their lightsabers struck out of their hands in training. So I put a lanyard on mine."
Opening his mouth Deadpool is just about to ask an other question but Peter interrupts him. "Also before you ask. I came up with the wrist cuffs because you Sith seem overly found of cutting peoples hands off."
Pouting Deadpool seems somewhat disappointed at the answer. "So you just have common sense?"
Shrugging Peter nods. "Basically."
"So..." Looking down at the floor a slow smile spreads across Deadpool's face before he looks back up with a grin. "Do I make your common sense tingle?"
"Not really."
With a grin showing too much teeth the Sith's eyes turn dark."It should."
Frowning Peter opens his mouth to ask,"Why-" but gets the air knocked out of him as the Sith tackles him.
Springing up from his kneeling position Deadpool knocks the lightsaber out of Peter's hand as he tackles him. Quickly spinning them around the Sith grabs Peter's wrists pining them against the wall.
Pressed up closed to each other Deadpool grins and leans in even closer. "Is your common sense tingling now?"
Staring into the Sith's eyes they seem to glow yellow trough the mask. Mouth dry Peter, swallows heavily, failing to come up with something to say, but is saved when the sound of footsteps reaches them.
Pouting in mock disappointment Deadpool pushes his body even closer. "Seems like we need to cut this short."
Adjusts his grip on the apprentice wrists he transfers both of them into one of his hands, letting the other one trail down Peter's side, stopping at his hip.
Breath hitching Peter can't take his eyes of the Sith's.
Leaning in Deadpool stops a hair's breath from Peter's mouth before smirking. "Bye, bye, baby-Jedi." Hand quickly sliding from Peter's hip to his own belt Deadpool disappears.
Blinking in confusion Peter stares at the empty space in front of him.
What do you think?
By the way I was horrified to see that I couldn't find any Spideypool/Star Wars crossovers. Really hope this puny WIP might inspire others.
If anyone is interested my name on tumblr is Seth-Figment.
If you've got though this far, why not drop a comment/review?