Hogwarts a History – Otters can't catch what?
Chapter 10 – You got wubbed

…

"He's not in the house!"

"Not in the garden!"

"Well, where is he?"

The various Weasley's stood assembled at the front stoop of the Burrow looking various levels of anxious. The cause, a lack of one house guest.

"You don't think he got lost in the woods, do you?"

Molly, like any good mother, knew the sort of trouble a young man could get into on his own. She'd raised enough of them, she ought to. "Did you check the garage?"

"He's not in there," said Arthur, "I put a perimeter ward around it after the boys, borrowed, the car."

Fred and George very conspicuously did not look at their father. It wasn't like they felt guilty or anything, they were just, keeping an eye out for Harry. Yeah, that's it.

"Perhaps we should check with the neighbors," Percy suggested.

"Good idea Percy. Luna was just here this morning," said Molly.

"Looney!" exclaimed Ron, who received a quick smack from his mother.

"Ya think she got him?" wondered Fred.

"Fed the poor bloke to the Woozle's," said George.

"The Woozle's aren't so bad."

"Harry!" the family exclaimed as the subject of their conversation strode up looking rather shell shocked.

"Mate, where ya been?"

Harry seemed confused by the question, "I fell down an otter hole," he said.

"Dear, are you alright? What happened?"

"I got wubbed."

The Weasley's stared, "Wubbed?" said Ron.

Harry nodded, "That's what he does."

"What who does Harry?" asked Arthur.

"The Wooby."

More staring, "The what?"

"The Wooby," he repeated, "he wub's you. That's what he does."

Fred and George snickered at a joke only they seemed to get but Ron was just confused, "What's a Wooby?"

"A greasy haired basement dwelling troll trying way too hard to be hip, and with it."

More stares, and snickering, "What the bloody hell does that mean?"

Harry shrugged, "That was the secret hidden by the Seven Secret Skulls. Although, they should be called the Six Secret Skulls, I don't care what Luna says. Her head cannot be a seventh skull, I don't care if it did work, it's just silly."

The mention of Luna melted the permeating anxiousness, various Weasley's nodding like it was all to be expected. "That girl and her imagination," said Molly.

"Looney," Ron mumbled under his breath.

"Well, we've found him, that's what matters," said Arthur. "Inside everyone. Time for dinner isn't it Molly wobbles?"

"Of course, of course, come along everyone."

The Weasley's filed into the house but Ron hung back a moment with Harry, "You okay mate?"

"Yeah, yeah I'm fine," said Harry, at last remembering how to blink again.

"She really is crazy ya know."

"Who?"

"Luna."

Harry shook his head, "She's not so bad," he said. "I'm actually curious to see where she gets sorted when we get to Hogwarts."

"I hope it's not Gryffindor."

"Boys! Come along!"

"Better get in there," said Ron.

Harry followed his friend into the house, putting all thoughts of otter's and Wooby's from his mind. Tomorrow it would be off to Hogwarts and a nice quiet year of magical education.

(You may feel free to laugh at the poor naïve protagonist now)