Olivia knew she had made the right choice in telling the truth that day. She knew it. But that didn't help her feel any better once she stepped out of the courtroom. Annabeth had been the one person that Olivia had come across who deserved to be able to live her life, despite committing murder. At least, Olivia felt that way at the start of the day because she could see the victim inside the woman. Now, she wasn't too sure. Rollins had been right- Annabeth hadn't been held hostage and her dead husband wasn't William Lewis. Sure, there were similarities, but Olivia hadn't killed her abuser, even though there had been plenty of chances. She had beaten him to within an inch of his life, but she had stopped short of murder. She had admitted her actions the moment Nick and Fin had told her how Lewis was when she had been rescued. She had admitted in court that she had wanted to kill him. Annabeth had admitted to the murder of her husband and had said she was glad. She certainly hadn't been remorseful.
"Benson! What the hell were you going to do in that courtroom?" demanded an angry voice from behind her.
"What do you want, Stone? I told the truth and you won. Shouldn't you be out celebrating or something?" Olivia snarled, anger radiating off of her.
"You were willing to perjure yourself. What kind of cop are you?!"
"The kind that believes in people. Which is something you clearly don't!"
"She killed a cop."
"So? Being a cop doesn't mean you get away with things! Cops uphold the law and do the right thing."
"Would you have lied?"
"I don't know what I would have done."
"What were you thinking?"
"None of your business!"
"You were thinking about William Lewis. Yes, that's right," said Stone when Olivia's head quickly lifted in his direction. "I did my homework. I know what Lewis did to you. You were thinking that her husband was exactly like Lewis, weren't you?"
"Get. Out." Olivia's tone had turned icy and her eyes burned with uncontrolled anger as tears stung and threatened to spill over.
"You must have enjoyed being tortured by Lewis if it took you four days to decide that you would beat him to death with an iron bed post..."
"I said GET OUT!" Olivia finally shouted, the last of her control evaporating with Stone's words.
"What's going on in here?" Fin asked as he stepped into Olivia's office. "I've never heard you scream like that, Liv."
"Get him out of here, now, before I call security," Olivia said angrily.
Fin obeyed the order immediately. Something told him that after he got rid of Stone, Olivia would need a friend. Hurriedly, Fin took Stone by the arm and dragged him out of the office.
"Carisi, can you make sure he leaves the building?" asked Fin.
"Where are you going?" Carisi replied.
"Check on Liv, probably do some damage control. I don't know what he's said to her, but she's damn pissed and looks like she's going to cry."
Rollins looked up from where she was filing paperwork. "I bet I know," she said, glaring at Stone. "Let me check on her before you go in, Fin."
"Okay." Fin nodded and returned to his desk, leveling a glare at Stone as Carisi passed by on the way to the door.
Olivia waited for Fin to leave her office and then sat on the couch in her office. She tried to take a deep breath, knowing Fin would be back in no time at all, and she wanted to be calm before he returned. However, as the anger disappeared and memories resurfaced, Olivia felt the tears fall.
"Liv? Are you okay?" asked a quiet, calm voice from the open door.
Olivia just looked up. As soon as she had heard Rollins' voice, she knew that the detective would have figured out what Stone had said. There was no point in hiding the tears and pain.
Closing the door behind her, Rollins took a seat on the couch next to Olivia. "I'm sorry, Liv. I know that it can't have been easy."
"You were right, Amanda," said Olivia after a moment. "Annabeth wasn't a hostage, and Tommy wasn't Lewis. I knew that, but there were so many similarities, I couldn't stop myself from thinking about it."
"Nobody can blame you for thinking it, Liv. We weren't there with you, but we know that it was hell with him. All we needed to be able to tell that was to see you after we found you."
"Stone..."
"Had no right bringing it up with you. He had absolutely no right."
"How did you know...?"
"I didn't, but when Fin said you were upset, I had a feeling that Stone had brought up something."
Olivia sighed. "I almost lied on the stand. I almost said that Annabeth had remorse. She was looking at me like she was pleading with me."
"Why did you say the truth then? You were pretty set on helping her."
"I don't know. Maybe it was the look she was giving me? I didn't want her to get away with murder. I guess that I realised what she had done in that moment."
"If you don't mind me asking, Liv, what did Stone say to you? Fin said you were pretty pissed."
For a moment, Olivia didn't answer. She wasn't sure how to answer without more memories surfacing.
"You don't have to answer if you don't want to."
"He said I liked what Lewis did to me," whispered Olivia finally. "That I enjoyed the four days of torture because I had time to contemplate killing him by beating him up." Olivia looked at Rollins, tears pouring down her cheeks now. "You know, I did contemplate how I would kill him. I didn't want to, but I still thought about it. Maybe Stone was..."
"If you say that he was right, I'll slap you," interrupted Rollins, earning a shocked look from Olivia. "He was not right. He doesn't know what you went through, doesn't know how much Lewis tortured you even after you were away from him. Stone doesn't know anything. You need to stop blaming yourself for this trial, because it isn't your fault that Annabeth went to prison. It her own fault, and nothing can change that, not even Stone's words."
Rollins stood up and walked to the door. "Don't let this one be the reason we lose the best lieutenant we ever had."
As the door closed, Olivia sighed. She knew Rollins was right, again. Taking a deep breath, Olivia stood up and grabbed some tissues, vowing that she wouldn't let Annabeth's situation haunt her any longer.