Just a lil' one-shot I felt like doing. . . (NOTE: this fic is best read
ALOUD)
DISCLAIMER: I do not own YYH. I'm just borrowing the characters for a bit. ^.^
~*~*~*~*~*
Okay, so there was Hiei, standing stark naked in a vat of pudding . . .
Wait. Let me back up . . .
It all started three days ago. Why three days? I don't know. But anyway, it was three days ago when Kurama got an unexpected visit from everybody's favorite fire demon. The little guy (who I hope you all know is Hiei) said "Hn."
Kurama found this to be normal and took him out for dinner, and of course one thing led to another and eventually Yusuke, Kuwabara, Botan, Keiko, and some homeless guy were all going. For some reason, that tends to happen a lot in fics . . . two people decide to go out for dinner or something and BOOM!! The whole of Japan is going!
Anyway, there they were in the restaurant, but little did they know that they were being watched . . .
Well actually they weren't ALL being watched. It was mainly Hiei. Who was watching him, you ask? You DID ask, didn't you?
What?! You didn't?! Well then back up two paragraphs and start over.
NOW did you ask? Okay, if you MUST know, I was watching him. Name's BD, by the by. Why was I watching him? Because he's hot, duh! So there I was, watching him from a tree. Exactly three days ago. He ate a cheeseburger and had a coke. Mmm, burger. So while I stalk Hiei, a plan formulates. A plan, see? I'm going to get this vat of pudding, and. . .
~*~*~*~*
Two days later. I'm outside the kitsune's house, waiting. Waiting, waiting, waiting. . . aha! Here comes Hiei! I knew he'd come along, because I planned it that way. I told Botan to gather them up on a 'mission' for me. Ain't I clever? Soon Yusuke and Kuwabara should show up too. Then they'll all be in the house . . . exactly where I want them.
A few minutes pass . . . a few more minutes . . . and still no idiots. So I decide to see what Kurama and Hiei are up to. The blinds are closed in Kurama's window. That's odd, they were open before. Hmm.
GASP! They aren't . . . are they?! Could it be? Is it true?! Of course, I don't hesitate to smash the window and push away the blinds. Any normal person would have thought about it first, but my hentai mind won't allow it. Orders from up top, you know.
There are Hiei and Kurama, sitting on the floor eating potato chips and playing video games. Disappointed? I bet YOU are, but of course I'm not. I'm not a yaoi fan.
And then it hits me. My plan! They've seen me! And what's more, I've broken a window! Cool! Oh wait, that's bad . . . well now they've seen me. As quickly as possible, I leap out the window and fall with a loud 'thud' to the ground. Damn! The ground is a lot harder than I thought!
So I land on my back and look up, what do I see? Hiei and Kurama poking out the window, looking down at me. (Oh my! A rhyme! I think I shall do a poem!).
"I'M OKAY!" I shout, and then run for my life, managing to trip over a poodle. Don't ask me how it got there. But after I hit it, the damn thing was intent on chewing off my left foot.
They exchange a frightened glance and go back inside to play video games, shrugging it off as another insane fangirl.
Me?! Another insane fangirl?! How dare they! I am BD! BD-chan the MORE- insane-fangirl!!
Right on cue, about two hours late, Yusuke and Kuwabara come walking up the street. There I was, lying in a rosebush below Kurama's window, about to get caught . . .
"Shut UP, Kuwabara!" Yusuke was pleading. Kuwabara babbled on senselessly.
"But Urumeshi it was HUGE!" he wailed. "It chased her round and round and- ."
"SHUT UP!!"
I blinked and stared, and they rang Kurama's doorbell. That's when I realize that Kurama and Hiei have a sense of humor. They don't say anything as the doorbell is rung, which I find odd. Yusuke, being who he is, lets himself in. They walked in and I ran to a window to watch. They walk around a little, calling for Kurama. Eventually they realize that they should go UP the stairs to get to his room.
So naturally I need to investigate.
Climbing hastily up a tree, I hop un-gracefully and catch myself on Kurama's windowsill. Poking inside, I see Kurama and Hiei sitting down next to the door, which is locked. Yusuke knocks on the door. Kurama giggles cutely, and my eyes widen in shock. Yusuke knocks again.
"Kurama? Was that you?" he asks.
Kurama giggles again.
"K-Kurama?"
Kurama pokes Hiei, as if to say 'come on! Do something!'
Then Hiei scares us all, "Hn. More, fox."
I can barely control my laughter as Yusuke pauses for a moment. I hope he's not LISTENING. That would be screwed up . . .
Kurama seems inspired by Hiei's boldness, and thuds on the floor a rhythmically. Okay, now they've gone too far!!
Suddenly Kuwabara shrieks like a girl and runs out of the house, leaving Yusuke to deal with "it" by himself.
Yusuke pounds on the door in hysterics, "YOU GUYS! THAT'S SO GROSS!! QUIT IT!! DOWN BOY!! . . . or something. . . I think . . . EWW!!"
Hiei smiles, tossing his shirt across the room and motioning for Kurama to do the same, which not only scares ME, but Kurama as well.
Yusuke pounded relentlessly on the door, shouting at them to stop. Hiei rubbed his hands back and forth along his hair to mess it up a bit, as Kurama took off his shirt, getting the idea.
As soon as they were both shirtless and had messy hair, Kurama took a few deep breaths to get his breathing irregular. Hiei did this also, as I watched in fascination.
Kurama threw open the door, and there was Yusuke. He was pale and shivering in fear.
"Y-Y-You guys didn't . . ."
Hiei only nodded solemnly, feigning fatigue.
"Holy shit!!" Yusuke turned tail and ran, falling down the stairs and stumbling awkwardly to the door, not bothering to close it. He just ran. Ran far, far away.
Hiei and Kurama burst out laughing together, running to the window to watch him run. Shit! I'M in the window!! Hiei pulls back the blinds and we both yelp, him falling backwards on his ass and me falling backwards and falling . . . farther.
Kurama blinks. "Who are you, and- HEY! You're that girl who broke my window awhile ago!"
I nod. "Yeah, that's me."
Hiei pokes his head out also and stares at me. I stare back, and he walks away.
"So . . . Uhh . . . go away?" Kurama suggests.
I strike a nifty battle pose and run off down the street, still intent on fulfilling my plan.
~*~*~*~*~*
okay, so maybe not a one-shot. This idea smacked me in the face and I wrote it. I thought it was funny . . .
I guess you have to have a healthy sense of humor. ^.^;;
Flames and Torches,
~BD-chan~
DISCLAIMER: I do not own YYH. I'm just borrowing the characters for a bit. ^.^
~*~*~*~*~*
Okay, so there was Hiei, standing stark naked in a vat of pudding . . .
Wait. Let me back up . . .
It all started three days ago. Why three days? I don't know. But anyway, it was three days ago when Kurama got an unexpected visit from everybody's favorite fire demon. The little guy (who I hope you all know is Hiei) said "Hn."
Kurama found this to be normal and took him out for dinner, and of course one thing led to another and eventually Yusuke, Kuwabara, Botan, Keiko, and some homeless guy were all going. For some reason, that tends to happen a lot in fics . . . two people decide to go out for dinner or something and BOOM!! The whole of Japan is going!
Anyway, there they were in the restaurant, but little did they know that they were being watched . . .
Well actually they weren't ALL being watched. It was mainly Hiei. Who was watching him, you ask? You DID ask, didn't you?
What?! You didn't?! Well then back up two paragraphs and start over.
NOW did you ask? Okay, if you MUST know, I was watching him. Name's BD, by the by. Why was I watching him? Because he's hot, duh! So there I was, watching him from a tree. Exactly three days ago. He ate a cheeseburger and had a coke. Mmm, burger. So while I stalk Hiei, a plan formulates. A plan, see? I'm going to get this vat of pudding, and. . .
~*~*~*~*
Two days later. I'm outside the kitsune's house, waiting. Waiting, waiting, waiting. . . aha! Here comes Hiei! I knew he'd come along, because I planned it that way. I told Botan to gather them up on a 'mission' for me. Ain't I clever? Soon Yusuke and Kuwabara should show up too. Then they'll all be in the house . . . exactly where I want them.
A few minutes pass . . . a few more minutes . . . and still no idiots. So I decide to see what Kurama and Hiei are up to. The blinds are closed in Kurama's window. That's odd, they were open before. Hmm.
GASP! They aren't . . . are they?! Could it be? Is it true?! Of course, I don't hesitate to smash the window and push away the blinds. Any normal person would have thought about it first, but my hentai mind won't allow it. Orders from up top, you know.
There are Hiei and Kurama, sitting on the floor eating potato chips and playing video games. Disappointed? I bet YOU are, but of course I'm not. I'm not a yaoi fan.
And then it hits me. My plan! They've seen me! And what's more, I've broken a window! Cool! Oh wait, that's bad . . . well now they've seen me. As quickly as possible, I leap out the window and fall with a loud 'thud' to the ground. Damn! The ground is a lot harder than I thought!
So I land on my back and look up, what do I see? Hiei and Kurama poking out the window, looking down at me. (Oh my! A rhyme! I think I shall do a poem!).
"I'M OKAY!" I shout, and then run for my life, managing to trip over a poodle. Don't ask me how it got there. But after I hit it, the damn thing was intent on chewing off my left foot.
They exchange a frightened glance and go back inside to play video games, shrugging it off as another insane fangirl.
Me?! Another insane fangirl?! How dare they! I am BD! BD-chan the MORE- insane-fangirl!!
Right on cue, about two hours late, Yusuke and Kuwabara come walking up the street. There I was, lying in a rosebush below Kurama's window, about to get caught . . .
"Shut UP, Kuwabara!" Yusuke was pleading. Kuwabara babbled on senselessly.
"But Urumeshi it was HUGE!" he wailed. "It chased her round and round and- ."
"SHUT UP!!"
I blinked and stared, and they rang Kurama's doorbell. That's when I realize that Kurama and Hiei have a sense of humor. They don't say anything as the doorbell is rung, which I find odd. Yusuke, being who he is, lets himself in. They walked in and I ran to a window to watch. They walk around a little, calling for Kurama. Eventually they realize that they should go UP the stairs to get to his room.
So naturally I need to investigate.
Climbing hastily up a tree, I hop un-gracefully and catch myself on Kurama's windowsill. Poking inside, I see Kurama and Hiei sitting down next to the door, which is locked. Yusuke knocks on the door. Kurama giggles cutely, and my eyes widen in shock. Yusuke knocks again.
"Kurama? Was that you?" he asks.
Kurama giggles again.
"K-Kurama?"
Kurama pokes Hiei, as if to say 'come on! Do something!'
Then Hiei scares us all, "Hn. More, fox."
I can barely control my laughter as Yusuke pauses for a moment. I hope he's not LISTENING. That would be screwed up . . .
Kurama seems inspired by Hiei's boldness, and thuds on the floor a rhythmically. Okay, now they've gone too far!!
Suddenly Kuwabara shrieks like a girl and runs out of the house, leaving Yusuke to deal with "it" by himself.
Yusuke pounds on the door in hysterics, "YOU GUYS! THAT'S SO GROSS!! QUIT IT!! DOWN BOY!! . . . or something. . . I think . . . EWW!!"
Hiei smiles, tossing his shirt across the room and motioning for Kurama to do the same, which not only scares ME, but Kurama as well.
Yusuke pounded relentlessly on the door, shouting at them to stop. Hiei rubbed his hands back and forth along his hair to mess it up a bit, as Kurama took off his shirt, getting the idea.
As soon as they were both shirtless and had messy hair, Kurama took a few deep breaths to get his breathing irregular. Hiei did this also, as I watched in fascination.
Kurama threw open the door, and there was Yusuke. He was pale and shivering in fear.
"Y-Y-You guys didn't . . ."
Hiei only nodded solemnly, feigning fatigue.
"Holy shit!!" Yusuke turned tail and ran, falling down the stairs and stumbling awkwardly to the door, not bothering to close it. He just ran. Ran far, far away.
Hiei and Kurama burst out laughing together, running to the window to watch him run. Shit! I'M in the window!! Hiei pulls back the blinds and we both yelp, him falling backwards on his ass and me falling backwards and falling . . . farther.
Kurama blinks. "Who are you, and- HEY! You're that girl who broke my window awhile ago!"
I nod. "Yeah, that's me."
Hiei pokes his head out also and stares at me. I stare back, and he walks away.
"So . . . Uhh . . . go away?" Kurama suggests.
I strike a nifty battle pose and run off down the street, still intent on fulfilling my plan.
~*~*~*~*~*
okay, so maybe not a one-shot. This idea smacked me in the face and I wrote it. I thought it was funny . . .
I guess you have to have a healthy sense of humor. ^.^;;
Flames and Torches,
~BD-chan~