Summary: Shiro makes the -worst- puns. - humor, oneshot.

Written for Puppetmaster55, originally posted on Tumblr.

Do You Need a Hand?

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Two days ago, Pidge disappeared into the Castle's R&D labs, giddy and babbling about alien tech and highly advanced prosthetics. Shiro's metal arm was laid out on a workbench inside, awaiting repairs and enhancements. Predictably, no one had seen Pidge since.

"I'm getting worried." Shiro admitted, casting a glance at the locked lab door. "Is everything ok in there? How long will this take?"

"Pidge is fine," Lance reassured. "Hunk and I have been enforcing a schedule. Two square meals and six vargas of sleep per quintaint."

"…Good," Shiro said, moderately relieved. He shifted a bit, concern still on his face. "Honestly though, I… I feel a bit exposed without my prosthetic," he admitted, sending Lance a shaky smile. "I hope Pidge finishes soon, before the Galra attack again. I'm unarmed."

(Warning sign #1, Lance would later note. Slipped right past him.)

"What? You'll be fine," Lance said, leading Shiro away. "Why don't you go do something? Keep your mind busy?"

"…I guess Coran did need a second pair of hands in the lab," Shiro said, straight-faced.

(Warning sign #2 and Lance was blind. Blind, I tell you.)

"Sounds like a plan," Lance nodded, smiling. They reached the elevator and Lance tapped the call button. Then, with poor word choice, he sealed his fate. "You might have trouble moving those boxes with just one arm though. Do you need a hand?"

A pause. Lance stared at Shiro, blood draining from his face.

"I thought Hunk said you didn't like puns!" Shiro said, ecstatic.

"It was an accident!" Lance threw his hands out, frantic. "It was an accidental pun and no one can say otherwise–"

"But you're right, I could use a hand," Shiro chirped, looking unfortunately pleased at Lance's contribution. "Sadly, you can't really find Galra prosthetics just lion around…"

Oh no. Lance stared with dawning horror at his leader, his hero, as pun #1 and pun #2 retroactively clicked. The elevator chose that moment to appear with a Ping! like a cheerful, mocking soundtrack to Lance's misery. Arm puns. I'm doomed.

Shiro stepped into the elevator, motioning at the buttons. "Could you operate the controls?" he asked politely. "I'm not sure I can handle it right now."

Lance groaned and stepped into the elevator, wordlessly clicking the button that led to Coran's workstation.

"I just have one question," Lance said as the doors slid shut behind them. "Did Hunk corrupt you with his own puns? Or have you always been this way?"

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