Hi,I'm 4everynaya and I want to get back into writing. I starting writing Fanfiction when I was 13 years old and I am currently 18 in college and want to start over. What better way then to write on a site where people share their opinion if you want to hear it or not right?

The story starts in new moon during Bella's "depressed" period.

Enjoy.

P.S I own nothing but the characters I make up.

Chapter 1: Discovering myself

Bella Pov

Why? After everything we've been through? I was accepting. I never judged him, even when most people would. I mean vampires? COME ON. I literally gave him everything. I DID everything to be with him. I gave up my friends. I don't spend time with charlie because he wanted all of my time. I'm just so angry. Who does that to someone? That's so sadistic. To make someone love you for fun. As a charade, a joke. That's funny to people? Gosh I HATE VAMPIRES.

Here I sit staring out the window in this depressed state. I don't know how to get out of this funk. It wasn't just him leaving that hurt. My entire family left me. Carlisle and Esme they were my parents. Not the kind that were forced to have you because of unprotected sex, but the kind that chooses you because they see you as family. Being an only child I always craved having a big family-NO I will not sit here in wallow in self pity like a loser. If you want change make it.

I made my way to the closet to start my road to self-love or at least that's what some girl called it in a video I seen a couple days ago. I went through everything from bras to pants and threw out anything Alice bought or Edward seen worthy of complimenting me in. I wanted a fresh start away from the cullens. They didn't deserve to have me that way.

Damn I really have no clothes now. Whatever I'll get more later.

As I stared at the clothes that were now being thrown away I shed a tear. Not because I was sad, but because I was happy. I want to be strong. I want to make Charlie proud. I'm more like my dad then I realize. When swans love they love for life. He still isn't completely over mom.

As I walked over to my computer I did what that women on youtube said, write it out. I want this to be public I want people to hear it and know that love hurts. Yes, I'm bitter. So what? I googled how to create a blog and found this website where I can create my own blog and have it published for all to see.

Dear Dreamers,

Hi, my name is Marie and I'm here to talk about love. Yes, it's very cliche, but actually I'm here to talk about why love sucks. Let me start from the beginning. My story starts like every other heartbreak and that's falling in love. Only this wasn't just love it was dangerous, exciting, but in all the wrong ways. I was beaten and broken but not from HIM. I was told that I was inferior and childish, but HE didn't say it. I was the caterpillar while he was the eternal butterfly and I felt that. I was torn apart, but HE did that. I guess the break-up was my fault because I didn't love myself.

Love,

Marie

For those of you who are new here hi, my name is Isabella Swan. I am 18 years old and I recently moved to Forks, Washington to live with my father Charles Swan. I used to live in Arizona with my mom Renee, but she wanted to travel around the world with her boyfriend Phil and his very minor baseball league. I was 17 at the time of my move so it wasn't that heartbreaking that she didn't want to "babysit" me anymore. I mean I'm your daughter it's not babysitting its parenting. Whatever. Anyway long story short I was dumped. Everyone seems to know the story of poor Isabella Swan getting dumped in the woods like it was in a damn book or something.

Honestly, I can act as tough as I wasn't but breakups are hard and love sucks. It's getting better though I can finally breathe after 3 months. I'm starting this blog only no one is going to know it's me. I figured I can't tell anyone I dated a vampire and everything I've been through or I would literally end up in the crazy house; however, online is where I can say anything and people think it's fiction because people put anything on the internet. I mean

yesterday I seen a mix between a cat and a fox on some ad.

"Bella can you come down here?" Charlie said. Well there goes my peaceful time I thought as I crawled out the bed moving my laptop out of the way and made my way downstairs.

"Yea?" I said as I made my way into the kitchen where Charlie was attempting to make something the smelled god awful.

"Are you hungry?" he said looking sheepishly while looking at the burned breakfast hash.

"I think I'll pass. I'm to tired. Sorry dad." I said. Then I walked up stairs to sleep away the heartbreak. As I closed my eyes and everything went black a single tear ran down my cheek