A Mobile Suit Gundam: Iron-Blooded Orphans Fanfiction—Until the End of Line

Disclaimer: Usual disclaimer applies.

Character(s): Mikazuki Augus

Genre(s): Angst/Tragedy, Hurt/Comfort

A/N: Please note that English is not my native language, so please pardon me for any possible grammar & vocabulary mistakes. I might be continuing this for a two-shot, somehow I wanted to give a proper closure... remembering the way how I was very, very upset that Mika died – in such unfair way, too.

It was only a mere of few, quick split minutes; but it was enough to relive all the moments of his life back in his mind.

Barbatos.

Barbatos, his Gundam; that one machine that had denied him the remaining of his freedoms – no matter how very few – he could privilege. Or did it? The White Devil, as many called it – also the one that allowed him to salvage little of his body functions. It was so complicated, contradictory; he didn't quite understand. Well, he never had given much thought to it – or to anything else that mattered, honestly.

He was close to the end, he could feel it. So close. The sharp, pungent smell of his own blood around him; reeked of metallic tang added from the surrounding cockpit, collapsed on him. He could no longer see, or hear, or move; but the beast machine refused to stop. His body had failed him access to reality anymore, but he could feel it. He just knew it. Barbatos was still fighting, refusing to surrender. Their defeat was guaranteed, Tekkadan had lost, but Barbatos…

It was truly the most real manifestation of the devil itself.

He had come a long way to this far. The struggles were gruelling, the process was arduous, but he didn't give up. He wouldn't, as long as Orga was there to pick up his pieces and tell him what to do. He had decided, from that day, that he would follow Orga until the end of the world. He trusted Orga. He needed Orga, as much as Orga needed him. He would not fail, until they reached their final destination.

But Orga had died. Orga had left him. So why the resistance? Why the fights?

But there wasn't only Orga. There were others, so many others – Old Man, Biscuit, Eugene, Akihiro, Takaki, Yamagi, Danji, Ride, Shino... and many others whose name he couldn't remember.

And then there was also Atra, and Kudelia…

What should I do? What do you want me to do? I had failed them, hadn't I, Orga? I failed...

Just like Orga had failed his promise. Or had he? I'll take you there, Mika. I'll take all of you. To the place where we belong.

Yeah... you already took me there a long time ago, Orga... to that place where we belong to...

Tekkadan. His family. Our family.

He didn't fear death. Or anything, really. He had learned in the most hazardous way to survive; and in the process somehow, he had lost his ability to feel. Rule number one: kill before you get killed. He couldn't really remember the first time he took his first killing, all he could remember just how relieved he was. The relief that he was still alive, that he had survived another day, no matter how grave the injuries he might sustain. All he knew he was just so relieved that he had made it through the other day. To live, keep living.

Though, everything slowly changed the day he and Orga joined the CGS. The beginning wasn't particularly good for them, but they had a place to sleep and get food, not having to worry anymore about being bullied in the street. He met other children his age, even the younger ones; and he felt... a sense of belonging. That he belonged there. He didn't feel any strong attachment, but Orga helped him to understand. He woke up every day, looking forward to what other adventures the day might be offering him... along with his friends.

The others had become friends and family.

He never could really understand all the unfamiliar feelings he experienced during his time in the CGS, but as it didn't contribute any significant effect to his work, then he never bothered to try to fathom them. Orga had scolded him in few occasions, when Orga would say he didn't understand why he was so reckless and had burst out in certain events, the same question, over and over again, 'Why do you regard your life so little?! Don't you value your life?! Why the danger? Are you trying to kill yourself?! You fool! Don't ever do that again!'

He couldn't comprehend why Orga would ask him such questions then. Why the anger? What importance of his life would do Orga good? Why was it relevant?

But he had caught the message. Orga showed him; the value of his life. And the others, too. He would keep on living to protect his family. He felt that he had a purpose; that his life wasn't cheap. That there were people who would mourn him if he died.

Fine. If his ways could make Orga angry, unpleased, then he wouldn't do it again.

So he returned to the way it was, before all the confusions: Hey, Orga. What should I do next? How long until you'll take me there?

The usual questions; the usual detached tone.

So why now everything felt so hurt? Why was it so hurt?

He didn't want to die... he wanted to come back home. The place where he belonged. Home, where there was food, where it was warm, where there was laughter, where he could feel again...

To his family... Tekkadan.

Ah… I see, Barbatos. I understand. That's what are you doing now, right? You're trying to bring me back home. To everyone. I understand… then let's do this. I'll follow you. You'll take me there. To Orga… and everyone.

The last moments had been quick.

Somehow, he could see again. Through the ripped open cockpit of Barbatos, he saw the Reginlaze hovering over his dying mobile suit. The Reginlaze suit raised its Large Blade, ready for a killing blow. Through his blurry vision, he could hear Barbatos echoed in his mind: Evade. Opening by the right side of the torso… hover over it. The tail blade. In 34 seconds.

Now.

Barbatos groaned in protest to raise on its feet, but the movement still unbelievably fluid and fast. The data feedback from the Gundam was even more fierce and massive than he ever experienced before; providing him with the battle situation as clear as a pikestaff – before, everything had never felt so clear like now. The Gundam's remaining functional metal joints rattled loudly, and Barbatos ducked swiftly when the Reginlaze's Large Blade swung over, and he could feel hesitation coming from the Reginlaze – and that one precious second was more than enough for him. With a speed that almost impossible to see, the Barbatos' Tail Blade made its way to the Reginlaze's torso, not enough to kill, but enough to deny the mobile suit of its main weapon and the Barbatos countered with its remaining hand – the Gundam lunged back and smacked away the Reginlaze's Large Blade. The Reginlaze lost its balance and before it could regain composure, the Rex Nail had made its way through, clawing away the Reginlaze's legs and arms with terrifying accuracy and power, denying the green mobile suit of its standard manipulators and leg claws – thus its remaining movement support.

The Reginlaze collapsed to the ground with a hazardous crash and everything became silent.

Julieta could only look in shock as she processed what was happening. It was impossible. She saw it with her own eyes – that pilot was already dead. How could the beast move with such speed and power? What was left of the suit to fight? It was impossible. She couldn't believe her eyes. Just why? How he did do it?

But when the Gundam crashed on her Reginlaze, giving Julieta clear view to the cockpit of her enemy, she couldn't muster her senses to react. Something clicked in her mind and all of her fighting volitions vanished, thus giving the beast the chance it needed to claim victory. In that only split second, Julieta finally saw what she had failed to until now: he was no devil, they were no devil, but the most human of them all.[1] They simply couldn't belong anywhere but on the battlefield. All these children knew was only fighting; to stand their ground, to protect their family. To continue living, to become human...

Her heart clutched painfully as tears subconsciously running down her cheeks and she gave a sign to all forces to halt.

Look what this distorted world made these children into. They were denied their own life, but they were still fighting. So ferociously. And what for? For those foolish sovereignties? Unacceptable!

Julieta made up her mind. This wasn't fair. She opened her communication and started talking to the open channel.

In front of her, the Gundam's glowing red eyes finally shut down as its head hung limply; unmoving.

Not if I could help to!

330 P.D.

The gentle breeze rustled through the open windows of the modest house, fluttering the white curtains back and forth. A wheelchair rested by the window, and Mikazuki was sitting on it. His head was slack against the headrest, eyes closed as he enjoyed the cool wind. It felt good. A blanket was over his legs; his body was wrapped in a thick jumper. His both hands sprawled lifelessly over the blanket.

Atra emerged from the door, bringing a silver tray with plates of food and a few small plastic bottles. A toddler followed behind, an exact replica of Mikazuki, except for his hair colour which matched Atra's.

"Time for lunch," Atra said softly, earning a small 'yeah' from the young man on the wheelchair. "Long wait?"

Mikazuki opened his eyes; the dysfunctional one was of a darker colour than the other. He nodded slightly, eyes focused on the plate: "Looks good."

Atra laughed at this. Ah, how endearing of him, it was all the food that could really attract his sole attention.

It reminded her a lot of happy times in the past.

"Tried my best," Atra smiled, and took the plate from the tray. The toddler stood by the wheelchair, an expectant look directed to Atra. The young woman stared at both of them, and let out a burst of laughter.

"You already hungry? It's been only ten minutes ago you had your lunch, Akatsuki," Atra raised an eyebrow and ignored the pleading look on the toddler's bright blue eyes. Akatsuki sighed at this, and climbed up to the wheelchair instead, settling himself carefully on his father's lap.

"Okay," the toddler agreed. "But it's okay if I sit here, right?"

"No problem," Atra assured, bringing the plate closer and began to feed the man. Mikazuki accepted the gesture, calmly and slowly chewing the food.

"Just slowly, okay," Atra said quietly. "Not wanting you to choke on your food, right? Oh, your hands are cold…" Atra mused. "You must keep it warm. Move a little bit, please, Akatsuki."

"I'll do it," Akatsuki offered, and he descended his father's lap. Carefully, the little boy covered the lifeless hands under the blanket, too.

"Ah. Thanks," Mikazuki said slowly, nodding at his son. "I'm sorry for all the trouble, Atra."

"Don't start," Atra said warningly, but gently. She continued her task feeding Mikazuki, and there was no further talk until the food was all gone. She then reached for the bottles on the tray, taking out one pill from each bottle. With little effort, she quenched the prescriptions to her husband, and finished in two minutes.

"There, all set," Atra announced, scooping Akatsuki to her own lap. "Let's get you back to bed, alright? You look tired."

"I'm okay," Mikazuki assured. "I want to be here for a little longer."

"Enjoying the view?'

"Yeah." Mikazuki averted his gaze outside the window, eyes began drooping as drowsiness swept over him. Atra noticed this and a painful prickle crept up her entire senses at the discernible body weakness. He's getting worse. "I like the farm you and Kudelia have built. It's beautiful. I'm sorry I couldn't be much of a help, Atra."

"We," Atra corrected, brushing away the thoughts off her mind. She squeezed a hand tenderly on Mikazuki's shoulder. "We built this together. And no, Mikazuki, honestly. You're the one who built this, all of this... this peaceful world, this peaceful life we're leading on... you've done so much. So much, for all of us. You've done your part... it's our turn now to continue to build this peaceful world and protect it."

Mikazuki stared at Atra, his expression was unreadable, but he nodded approvingly. "Okay."

There was a knock on the front door.

"I'll get it," Atra stood up from her chair. "You wait here with your father, Akatsuki."

"'Kay." Akatsuki nodded obediently, and climbed back up to Mikazuki's lap.

As Atra passed the small and short hallway to the front door, she took a quick glance to few photographs laced on the wall. Their family…

She opened the door and smiled when she saw their guest.

"Ah, hello, Miss Juris. Please do come in."

Julieta walked in and smiled back. "Miss Atra. How are you doing?"

"Oh, good!" Atra gestured the blonde woman to follow her. "We're good, thank you very much. He is inside, just finished lunch. Do you want to eat something? Have you had your lunch?"

"It's fine, please, don't make such a fuss over me," Julieta shook her head. "How is Mikazuki doing?"

"Yeah, um... he's holding on just good." the smile on Atra's face faded a little. "Miss Julieta… I could never thank you enough for saving him."

"Please, don't." Julieta shook her head and stared at the shorter young woman firmly, putting her hands over Atra's shoulder. "That was the right thing to do. I could never forgive myself… if I didn't do the right thing."

"Thank you for understanding us," Atra said sincerely. "Thank you… for seeing through us. Mr Bauduin is not coming today?"

"Oh, he said that he's sorry he couldn't make it today," Julieta informed her. "He will make it up next."

"I'm looking forward!" Atra nodded, and they made their way into the inner rooms, to where Mikazuki was sitting on his wheelchair.

Julieta had decided to give him the chance. She quickly made the arrangement that the young child soldier pilot was to be treated. He did already die the time they extracted him out from the damaged Gundam's cockpit; but somehow, he came back. However thin the possibility, Julieta would not let the chance slip away. If he came back, then there was a chance for him to keep living, and Julieta would make sure of it.

The recovery process was both gruelling and laborious. They couldn't bring back his four limbs functionalities – the doctors were surprised when they found out that his whole right side was already out of commission. They couldn't save his remaining limbs; the pressure from the ferocious fight was too much to take for the body and he would become paralysed for the rest of his life.

That wasn't all. There were also complications from the fatal injuries he had sustained during that decisive final battle. When he made it through, there would be permanent health authenticities of his vital organs and would give him an extremely weak constitution. But Julieta would see it through that he would live. She would see that he got anything he needed – that all their sacrifices would not be in vain.

When Julieta found out that he actually was expecting a son, Julieta became more even determined. She spent hours pacing back and forth in front of his hospital room, anxious and restless, refusing to give herself comfort. Gaelio was confused at her unusual behaviour, and in that time, Julieta finally let her defences broke down as she cried, telling Gaelio all that she saw during her last battle: that he was no devil, they were no devil, but the most human of them all. And he was going to have a son.

Julieta cried even harder when Gaelio took her into his embrace, and she understood that Gaelio had seen it through, too. They reached a mutual understanding.

It took almost full 8 months before he regained back his consciousness. It took another few long weeks before he could stay conscious through the day. Kudelia Aina Bernstein and his wife, Atra, had been always by his side during those toughest times, especially Atra. She never once left him; because Kudelia had works to do. Julieta and Gaelio had seen his son, Akatsuki, still an infant, watching his father curiously. What a joy it was for her that the little boy would not be another fatherless child, and that he would be coming back to his family.

Mikazuki had his own way of showing his gratitude. When finally he could speak again, he had asked casually that she was welcome for lunch together with them and pointed out that Atra's cook was the best in the world. Julieta accepted the offer silently, and she stayed true to her words. Later, it became somehow a routine for her, and in the process, Gaelio also became an addition to their regular visit. Often times, Kudelia would join them.

So when Atra turned the wheelchair around to face her, Julieta couldn't hold back a smile creeping up her face as she greeted, "Hello, Mikazuki."

"Ah." Mikazuki nodded slowly, and his lips retracted to the side, forming a little smile, too. "Welcome back, Julieta."

And Julieta replied back, in so much contentment, "I'm home."

Because it was what exactly Julieta honestly feel when she was here; with them. Watching this little family warmed her heart; and she promised that she would protect this peace with all her might, especially for Mikazuki.

They were finally home.

[1] As stated on Julieta Juris' page on the Gundam Wiki.