Hi, I'm genuinely so sorry that I've been gone so long and I utterly despise doing this as I really want to fix and carry on with my stories but unfortunately life has other plans. my father is dying and it really fucking sucks, he's been in and out of hospital these past few months and recently we got a diagnosis he's had a recent AKI, (Acute Kidney Injury) which has lead into CKD (Chronic Kidney Disease) it's at stage four and yea, there's really nothing to be done but to manage the condition for as long as I can.

I'm not one to bitch or moan about my life or to beg, I've led a unique life that's caused a lot of trauma and for death to become a...constant companion, I've lost a lot of family members, my mother included and I don't want to lose my dad but that's not how any of this works is it? I try to remind myself that so many people have it so much worse and that I'm lucky I can wake up and my dad's still there but one day- and I don't know how soon that won't be the case, Christmas is coming up and I'm just hoping he'll make it till then, of course, I want years still left with my dad, but I've found life doesn't particularly care for your wants.

I've been my father's carer since I left university due to my own mental health issues from a life of struggles: homelessness, bankruptcy, bullying, starvation, abuse, death...I get a carer's stipend but it's not all that much but we struggle along and find happiness wherever we can. writing is that happiness for me, I adore and revere it. when I had nothing and nobody to turn to or rely upon books and writing were always there for me and I'd lose myself in these fantasies because that escape from reality kept me from tilting over oblivion, however, I find myself adrift, lost and without focus and it's awful, writing is everything to me and yet whenever I start to write a new chapter for these stories and my own which I hope to one day publish, I just find myself lacking. My confidence with my writing has always been such a massive struggle for me, ironically enough I simply cannot put into words how much writing means to me, every fibre of my being and my soul itself, it's my own salvation but I always manage to find myself...lacking in such a beautiful art and I falter.

I want to get back to writing but right now... I'm unsure when I'll publish a new chapter and it's completely unfair to all of you, to ask to hold out hope but I will, I know I'll get back to writing because it's something I hold dear and I'm utterly devoted too, it's my wildest dreams to become a writer to publish my books and poetry and to give something to the world that is a slice of my soul.

it might be a while, it might not, I honestly don't know but I do know that I will come back to all of these stories and produce more along with hopefully establishing myself as a writer- I have a wattpad user/SMLincoln

if anyone is interested, it'll be where I'll post my original work when I get round to it I just wanted to thank everyone for even bothering to read these stories I know there are so many stories out there and you chose to read and review mine, I'm not accustomed to much happiness but that fact truly sends warmth through me and chases away the chill.

Thank you,

GameOfSuperWhoLockAtHogwarts