Sat outside my front window
This story's going somewhere
He's well hung and I am hanging on
There's a song on the radio that says:
"Let's get this party started"
So let's get this party started

I stared into the full length mirror, trying to decide on what to wear. The twin bed was littered with the remnants of my previous attempts: my black skinnies, my usual jeans, a pair of shorts, two deep scoop-neck shirts, and a black tank top. I was never any good at this sort of thing, but at least I had an endless supply of consultants living in my hall. I flipped my head over to pull my long hair into a ponytail, knowing that all the bodies crammed into the tiny house were going to make me sweaty, and I didn't enjoy feeling my hair sticking to the back of my neck. I looked back into the mirror and yanked the tie off again. This doesn't look right either.

"Leah!" I called.

My roommate emerged from the bathroom, mascara wand in hand, rolling her eyes at me. She really didn't need any makeup at all. As someone who saw what she looked like first thing in the morning, I could verify that she was naturally gorgeous. She could have been a model; she was tall, with high cheekbones and glowing copper skin, and her black hair fell down just past her shoulders. She was wearing skin-tight dark wash jeans, and a black tank top.

"Swan, I told you before, it looks just as good up."

"I'm still not sure." I frowned at my hair hanging down over my chest. I needed to just pick one and stick with it. Fine. Ponytail it is.

"You have to think strategically, here," she said, gesturing with the wand. "In addition to looking cute, you'll avoid overheating. And if you puke while I'm not around, you won't have to hold your own hair." Leah was always the pragmatist.

"I'm not going to puke this time. It's the first party of the year. I want to make a good impression."

She sighed and walked back into the bathroom we shared. I picked up various articles of clothing and held them against me in the mirror. Maybe if I gave them another chance, something would speak to me.

"Since when do you care about a bunch of freshies?"

"I don't," I called back. "But I care if I look like crap. I just want to start the year off right, you know?"

My method wasn't working. I huffed and grabbed my black jeans. They would just have to do. I stepped my feet through the holes and began that familiar hopping dance to get them fitted completely over my hips. I didn't used to wear jeans this tight. Everything I used to own was comfortable, if a little old. Leah put a stop to that during the summer by raiding my closet while I was out with Charlie. For someone stuck on a reservation with a bunch of boys for almost twenty years, she had a real aptitude for this sort of thing, something I definitely lacked.

I threw on the red shirt that I'd previously dumped on the floor, and crouched down to loosen the hips of my jeans enough that I'd be able to sit down later on. Upon a quick observation in the mirror, I decided that it was my best bet, and I joined Leah in front of the bathroom mirror.

"Just gimme a sec," she said, running a brush through her hair.

I was still a novice when it came to makeup. Renee tried, but there wasn't enough time before I left Arizona. I ran a light pink stain over my lips and dabbed powder onto my nose, knowing full well that I would just sweat it off in an hour, that is if some guy didn't eat it off my face.

"I don't know about you, but I'm mostly looking forward to all the fresh meat," she smirked. She never had any trouble with that, and I envied her.

"Don't be a creep. You remember what it was like back then, all those 'super friendly' upperclassmen offering us beer? It's a miracle we made it through the first semester without being drugged."

Leah rubbed the lipstick between her lips, opening them back up with a pop and smiling to herself in the mirror.

"Yeah, well, it still got us laid, didn't it? I don't think that bunk bed will ever be the same."

"I don't think it was made to have people banging on both beds at once. That thing could have collapsed at any moment. Just another example of how overly trusting we were."

I'd just barely finished with my own mascara when Leah ushered me out of the bathroom with a smack to the butt.

"Enough worrying. You need to move it, Swan, or the keg will already be empty when we get there."

I grabbed my keys and phone and shoved them into my pocket before stomping my feet into my ratty black converse, the only shoes I still had from high school. They were my big compromise with Leah: I could keep them as long as I wore other shoes too. Given the sludge that usually coated the floor at these things, good traction was top priority.

The party was in full swing when we arrived. There were some girls from our dorm milling about, but it was mostly awkward freshmen and the seniors who'd come to sleep with them. One of the fraternity brothers was manning the keg, taking singles from everyone in line. It was usually the cheapest beer they could find, but maybe they'd pick something nicer for the first party to keep the new additions coming back. Next to him was the "bar," also known as a folding table where another brother poured store-brand liquor into whatever mixers where left in their fridge. I pulled a few bills out of my phone case when Leah stopped me.

"Nope, tonight is on me. After my drunk-crying incident at your dad's house, I owe you a shitty drink." She kissed my cheek and turned to walked to the bar, leaving me against the wall of the basement. "Two tequilas, Jimmy! And it better not be fucking Sunny D this time or I'll tell your mom you suck dick for money."

She was pretty rough around the edges, but I could count on Leah for anything. She was a year ahead of me, and once she caught wind that I was going to Washington State in the fall, she started inviting me to go to Seattle and Port Angeles with her. She wanted to help me shop for dorm supplies and pass on as much of her wisdom as she could. "Remember Bella," she told me, "You can never have too many towels."

I'd never really had a girlfriend like this. Renee's hippie sensibilities and Charlie's…Charlie-ness were all I had to go on. Well, that wasn't entirely true. Edward's younger sister Alice loved clothes and makeup, but I was just a dress-up doll to her. I don't think she cared about me half as much as Leah, and all those designer "gifts" just made me uncomfortable.

I had barely been left alone for five minutes when one of the senior rugby players appeared next to me. The ruggers were built like football players, but no one had any trouble distinguishing them; like Crossfit junkies, they'll tell you. I could tell he was already a few drinks in, but that meant very little to a 200-pound meathead

"Hey, you look like you need a drink. The beer's pretty good tonight."

"I'm good, thanks," I replied. Usually, facing away from them and barely looking at them at all was enough to communicate disinterest, but these guys could be a little pushy.

"I'm Cody. I don't think I've seen you before. You're a freshman, right? If you need someone to show you the ropes, I-"

"She doesn't need to see your ropes, asshole," Leah interjected.

Her timing was impeccable. She pushed him out of the way with her shoulder and handed me a red cup filled with some mystery liquid.

"What's your problem? I'm just being friendly."

"Yeah, we remember how 'friendly' you were to our friend Mia, Cody. She's not interested. Go find some other girl to creep on."

He trudged away towards his friends at the beer pong table, muttering 'fucking bitch' under his breath. I breathed a heavy sigh of relief.

"You're my angel of mercy, Lee."

I took a sip from my cup, and swallowed hard as the harsh liquor burned my throat.

"What the hell is this?"

"Oh who knows. It's a tequila...something. Probably mixed with Minute Maid or some shit. It'll definitely do the trick, though."

I coughed and took another sip. It was disgusting, but it was strong at least. At this point, I was used to better quality stuff. One of the fraternities had a side business buying handles of liquor for underclassmen, so Leah and I had developed a taste for the finer things. Leah knew one of the brothers from the reservation, and together they convinced me to be their mule. In exchange for my own handle of cheap rum, I stuffed my backpack with towel-wrapped bottles and made deliveries to the dorms and sorority houses on my side of campus. Back then, I looked innocent and studious enough to fly under the radar of the campus police.

Together, we scanned the room looking for horny newbies and people we knew. A gaggle of overdressed girls were cackling in the corner, like a herd of antelope clustering together on the savannah. I remembered when I used to go everywhere with the girls on my floor. It was our security blanket while we learned how to navigate campus and all of its hazards. Other people were dancing to music that was almost nothing but a bassline that made the entire house vibrate, drunkenly grinding on each other and stumbling in their heels.

"There's a lot of virgins tonight," said Leah, licking her lips.

"Why do you always go after the virgins? Do you just crave disappointment?"

"What can I say? I like corrupting the innocent," she replied with a wicked grin. "They usually let me take the reins, so I make sure I'm never disappointed. Though I'll admit whiskey dick is a very real occupational hazard."

"They don't need to be virgins for that."

"True, but I'd rather have a virginal guy with whiskey dick than try to initiate some princess. That's where the real disappointment comes in."

Before I knew it, our cups were almost empty, and I could feel the buzz setting in. More people had come trickling into the basement, but there was nobody of interest among them. I couldn't believe I agonized over what to wear for this.

"This is pretty lame."

"Yeah, it's really too bad. People are too shy tonight." I eyed the pong table. "Or not shy enough."

I grabbed Leah's hand, dumping my cup in the trash.

"C'mon, let's hit up the smoke room."

"I thought you'd never ask."

We pushed through the group on the dance floor to the other end of the basement and squeezed through the door, which was partially obstructed by a couple furiously making out. A cloud of smoke drifted out that should have been enough to set off the fire alarm, and we planted ourselves on couch that was clearly no longer its original color. Bob Marley and Scarface posters lined the walls while a Sublime track played in the background. Now all we needed was some Christmas lights and a pile of rancid laundry to win Freshman Dorm Bingo.

They were passing around a glass pipe and coughing like coal miners with every pass.

"Jesus Christ, look at these infants," Leah muttered in my ear. "If they keep torching it like that it's going to be cashed before it even gets to us."

"Yeah well after those drinks, I want to make sure you get your money's worth. I promise: if it gets to us and they don't pack another, we can go back out and I will dance with you."

Leah's eyes lit up.

"Really?"

"Really."

"You've got yourself a deal, Swan."

Of all the things that changed since I left Forks, grace was not one of them, but I was less concerned about embarrassing myself and more so about causing permanent damage. We watched the boys fumble with the lighter for another ten minutes before giving up. There was no ventilation except for a crack in the window, so the secondhand smoke was probably more than we were ever going to get.

"Alright, time's up, bitch," Leah declared, picking me up off the couch and marching me back into the main room.

There had been a flood of new people since we left, and the floor was packed. She dragged me into the center to dance, and in my altered state, I was very grateful to be wearing my sneakers instead of the shoes Leah wanted me to wear. The music had improved, too. It sounded like someone had wrenched control of the music out of Kyle's hands, which was to everyone's benefit. The beat was good, and I was slowly coming around to dancing. It wasn't long before Leah stumbled, and I grabbed her by the waist to steady her. For a lame party, I was actually having a lot of fun, and Leah was too, though she was more far-gone than me.

"Lee, I'm going to go get a beer. You want anything?"

She shook her head, still too immersed in the music to care.

I barely made it back to the keg, which was nearly empty, shoving a dollar into the guy's hand before filling up with the dregs. I stayed on the edges of the floor for a bit observing Leah, who was now grinding on a wide-eyed kid that was probably barely eighteen. One day, I wanted to be on her level, able to just do whatever I wanted without being so goddamn self-conscious all the time. It was all part of the New Bella Swan Project. I was going to be more outgoing, take more risks, and be more up-front with people. I wasn't going to take any more shit from anyone. Leah was a good coach.

I scanned the crowd again, only finding my old roommate chatting with her sorority sisters. Gina was nice, but not someone you'd want to live with. When I looked to her left, I nearly choked on my beer. A tall, bulky figure was facing the wall, apparently making out with some girl whose leg was hitched up around him. He had long, thick black hair tied in a ponytail at the nape of his neck, with a circular tattoo on the russet skin of his shoulder, peeking out from under the sleeve of his shirt. There was no mistaking: It was him.

I was frozen in disbelief. What was he doing here? He couldn't be a student. I heard that he failed a semester and would have to repeat. Not that I cared. He'd made his bed. Jacob Black wasn't my concern anymore. But why did he have to show up after all this time?

I should have moved. I should have hidden behind a tall person or a wall or literally anything, but I didn't. I was too transfixed by the back of his head, praying that I had it all wrong and that it was just one of his stupid buddies from the rez. The girl he was with climbed down off of him and headed towards the bar, receiving a short smack on the ass from her partner as she departed. He turned around and leaned against the wall, shoving his hand into his pocket to retrieve his phone. I was right, and it wasn't until he looked up and noticed me staring at him that I realized just how badly I'd fucked up.

I made a beeline for Leah, sloshing beer onto the front of my shirt as I searched the crowd for her. She was making out with the guy from before.

"Lee!" I shouted over the music.

"Kinda busy here, Swan," she slurred, looking at me from the corner of her eyes.

"We need to go, Leah. Now."

She shoved the guy off of her and loudly whispered something lewd into his ear.

"What's your damage?" She saw my unusually pale face, and her expression changed from annoyance to concern. I grabbed her wrist and led her outside and into the street.

"Seriously, what's going on? Bella?"

I was still power-walking towards the dorm, which was thankfully just across the way from the house. She got tired of being dragged and finally yanked her arm away.

"Jacob Black was in there."