?, ?, Death's Offices, Destiny and Rebirth Division

The continuing, seemingly unending failures to avert the prophesied disaster in the mid-twenty-first century has led to an inordinate amount of work in the Destiny and Rebirth Division. No less than five individuals having been giving resets to try and alter events to prevent the oncoming Apocalypse - so far, it has been rather unsuccessful.

People only have a limited number of retries possible in their souls, before they burn out, and the opposition is determined to have its own way, damn the consequences.

Sending the master manipulator back the one time had, perhaps, been the worst mistake ever made. But the destined one had just got his reaper fired, having fucked up horribly and barely off the starting line, so the office was in disarray.

They were very thankful the enhanced insightfulness of the Bearded Bastard had faded over further repetitions, things had been practically normal in the most recent attempt.

Still, worst mistake. Ever.

They were indeed still trying, and they were very thankful that people don't retain memories from their final re-try if someone else gets a shot. The memories are technically still there, just suppressed to create less interference and confusion for the next agent. It is, however, time for another attempt, and in the opinion of Hubert, acting head Angel of Death, Keeper of Records, (and distinctly not a personal reaper so he can't be fired when things go wrong again,) they are starting to get a little desperate.

And here she is, Luna Lovegood, freshly plopped into his guest chair. She looks fairly old, but he hadn't had the time to read her files properly, so he didn't know much about her most recent life, just that she had jumped, willingly, into the Veil of Death. He wasn't really supposed to do these interviews, but something had happened to her personal reaper, so as acting head he had to pick up the slack.

"Yes, yes. You're wondering why you're here-"

"Hi, Hubert." Luna trills, grinning at the Reaper "Nice to see you again, I'm guessing sending Ginny back didn't work out?"

"You are- what, how do you- No, we didn't-" Hubert, experiencing Luna in full for the first time, "Alright. One moment." He reaches to grab a piece of paper off his desk, reads it for a minute, before turning back to Luna.

"You remember me."

"Ye-p"

"That is not supposed to happen." His face firmly fixed into a blank expression, Hubert seems to have trouble processing the fact that Luna, largely, ignores the standard requirements of reality.

"Makes it easier."

"Still not supposed to happen."

"It certainly made the last one make more sense, couldn't figure out who you sent back though." She tilts her head, piercing him with her blue eyes "I thought it might be Ginny, she was a little too... Effective this time."

Hubert's mask is starting to break as his eyebrows twitch "'Made more sense.' 'This time.'"

"Well, yes, all that... What was the phrase Hermione used? Deha... deha-yu?"

"Déjà-vu."

"Thank you. Yes, I was finding the constant feeling of Déjà-vu very confusing until you reset me the first time. It made it very hard to make friends." Briefly, Luna looks angry, before returning to her more placid self "It almost makes me dislike you."

"I don't particularly care if you dislike me or not."

"You say that, but you're here to send me back in time, stop Ron and Ginny poisoning and raping the destined couple, prevent the machinations of one dark lord, and stop the evil works of another. All while keeping it secret that I'm from the future."

"Where in the seventeen Hells did you learn that?! I know you didn't get a full briefing! I have the transcript!" Hubert has leapt up onto his desk while Luna is talking, outraged that, somehow, there is a security leak in death. Considering how many ghosts there are, he's lucky they aren't more security leaks.

"I asked Hermione before the Basilisk ate her." Luna's face droops "I really liked that reset up until then. She was really nice to me."

Huffing, Hubert angrily retorts "There was no security breach in that loop." Realising he is still standing on top of his desk and has knocked several of his knick-knacks, he climbs back down and gets back in his chair.

"She'd figured out the ghosts were watching her in her first year. Sad that Cho got the Diary, it would've been so easy to get it from Ginny."

Luna idly glossing over how Hermione managed to dodge the ghostly spies of Death's Offices does not go unnoticed by Hubert, he does, however, that it is a problem for later. To his later regret.

"So! I guess this is where you decide when to send me back? Well, I refuse. You've been rude. And I don't like being lonely." Luna grimaces "Being lonely is even worse after learning you had friends for three lifetimes before turning crazy due to remember bits of them."

"You don't get a choice." Hubert is not putting up well with Luna, realising that this is why her personal Reaper quit, and he got saddled with handling this on short notice. Personal reapers aren't even supposed to be able to quit.

"I do! It's in the contract. Signed it when I let my reaper go, she was quite happy with my requirements for releasing her from having to look after me."

Hubert finds this explains a fair bit. It is also terrifying. He's almost nervous when he asks "What requirements?"

"If I go back I get to make friends with, and give those previously reset their memories back!" Luna's practically cheering when she says this, before quickly calming to continue "Well, not immediately, after they either save my life or I save theirs, I can give them back the memories of their own reset. I also get the right to refuse to return, and just sit here and wait until the next person is sent back and go with them."

"At least, that's what I was promised. And considering I managed to get all three hallows this last time - seducing Harry away from Ginny was kind of fun, really. Wish it'd worked sooner, would've..." She shakes her head "The Wrackspurts must be getting to me. Anyway, with all three hallows in my possession upon my death, and the signed contract, it's enforceable."

Hubert is dumbstruck, and rather than replying he simply starts going over his papers far more thoroughly than he had before.

After several minutes, during which Luna is casually humming the tunes to songs from years as late as 2019, he finally stops reading.

"You failed to keep Ronald from claiming Hermione before Harry and shattering their bond, but seduced Harry away from Ginevra anyway?"

"He couldn't gift me the hallows on his death - I had nothing to do with that, I did love him - if I wasn't married to him. plus, after murdering Ron and Hermione's... Suicide..." Luna chokes on the last word, remembering how the revelations about Ron's actions, and how he had shattered her friendship with Harry permanently had driven the girl to Suicide. Luna's fault should never have told her. It broke Harry's heart.

Taking a deep breath Luna picks back up "After Hermione... Died. There wasn't any hope left of things going right, were there? So I seduced Harry, stopped Ginny's potions, and made him happy. The least I could do, I messed up. Didn't save them both. I know better now, both together, or neither." With a wan smile, she states "Neither can live, if the other should die."

"You've been more successful than any of our other returnees, even without being supposed to remember anything. Remarkable." He stares at the blond girl in front of him, "You've also caused more damage on many previous attempts, as you should have been a stabilising influence in the early years, but didn't for unknown reasons." Hubert sits back and smiles "You'll perform excellently, any questions before you go back?"

"I acted strange because of the Déjà-vu. It was so confusing seeing people I had met, but also hadn't, I avoided them until they found me on their own." Luna shakes her head at Hubert "I'm still refusing to go back. You were rude."

Hubert winces, he'd found the contract in her paperwork. It was fairly simple, but since she had held the Hallows on her death it really was enforceable. People aren't supposed to be able to refuse to go back, but this girl can. She was, however, also noted to be very forgiving.

"I apologise profusely for my rudeness, the strangeness and irregularity - including the fact I should not have been the one interviewing you - lead me to speak in a manner I should not." Hubert's attempt at appeasement is fairly blatant, but Luna is fairly easy to appease. He snaps his fingers and a bowl of pudding appears "Here, a token of my apology," He pushes the bowl towards Luna who pounces on it.

After swallowing the first spoonful Luna answers Hubert's nervous look "Apology accepted! Mmm, Pudding."

Hubert is about to speak when he finds a spoon jabbing in his direction "Do not interrupt the pudding." Her tone brooking no argument, and her gaze rather intimidating, Hubert settles back down in his chair and watches the now giddy girl vibrate as she eats her pudding.

Truthfully, he doesn't even know what kind of pudding it is, but she seems very happy with it.

When she finally finishes eating she sets the bowl back down - it promptly vanishes - and says "Well, I'll go back. If the contract conditions are met, but there are probably things we should talk about first." She waves a hand idly "I can't remember everything clearly - major things, like Hermione's explanation and her subsequent death, Dumbledore being evil, Ron and Ginny being aspiring potioneers, that's easy. Details? Details are hard."

Hubert watches her throughout, she has some things... mostly right, but there are always variables. He starts with "Dumbledore... Is not evil, describable as a dark lord, but not utterly evil. He truly believes there is no other path, and that those who work for him deserve the rewards he offers, and in the end, they would all be happy."

"I remember Harry being different, it was long ago," She pauses, then giggles, "Long, long ago, but he made friends with me before school once. Then when I got there, acted like he never knew me, or Hermione, or... anyone but Ronald and the other Weasleys, really." Looking down, it's obvious that this particular lifetime hurt more than most "It wasn't until I got reset the first time that I realised that Harry had been obliviated." She sighs "It must've been Dumbledore, mustn't it? And if he knew the future, from Harry, why would he try the same path that didn't work?"

"Because Harry exposed himself in the worst way possible. By giving no details, only acting in a way that Dumbledore considered untenable." Hubert knew this particular lifetime better than most, it was the one that effectively broke the Offices for the next half dozen attempts, and led to the waste of their second best option due to glaring errors.

"Harry exposed himself by avoiding Ronald and courting Hermione actively, by Christmas he had gone home with her, had his first kiss, and was working to get the Dursleys put in prison." Hubert stares to the side "He was successful, but Dumbledore would not permit it. Extensive obliviations, on all parties, made them forget any reason for the Dursleys to be imprisoned; and the power of the Elder Wand is such that when used on Harry, it removed his understanding of why he should avoid the Dursleys." Hubert turns back to Luna "Love. His understanding of Love, along with the memories of his time here, in the offices, as well as the previous attempt, all wiped out for no reason other than to return Harry to faulty blood wards." Hubert chuckles sadly "Blood wards that shattered three years later when he murdered his relatives and used them to create a Horcrux. It was a dark timeline."

Hubert gives Luna a minute to process this before coughing to catch her attention.

Blinking Luna moves onto her next question; "What about Hermione? I know things got altered by her actions, but the Basilisk never killed anyone else directly." Tilting her back and forth she continues before Hubert cans start answering "Not that I can remember, anyway."

"There was one instance of the Basilisk being released into the great hall on Hallow-e'en, killing all present, but otherwise you are correct. Hermione Granger being... Eaten, was an oddity." Hubert sighs "She caught the attention of the headmaster... We had, shortly prior, reset him in an attempt to fix the problems indirectly. Not a full reset, just a short jolt and provided insight." Looking at the ceiling, trying to avoid Luna's accusing gaze "The insight told him Miss Granger was a threat to his plans, which he took to mean she was a sleeper agent of Voldemort's. He manipulated events such that she would be in the path of the Basilisk when it returned to the chamber, before destroying it himself - in his mind ridding the school of two dangers at once and placing himself as a saviour of the school."

Luna is glaring accusingly at Hubert, Hermione had been so nice to her that year, picking her up on the train, acting like an older sister. Introducing her to Harry, and her wonderful hugs. That it ended because they had given the Headmaster a second chance turns her stomach and reinforces her dislike of the manipulator.

"I don't remember how that one ended either. " She finally says

"You wouldn't, it was terminated swiftly after Miss Granger's death. We have since attempted giving Neville Longbottom, Yourself and Susan Bones minor resets. Yours will be the first memory-included reset since Miss Granger."

He picks up the contract "Truthfully, I am nervous about this. Returning Harry's memories could be disastrous; especially under the conditions outlined. I cannot deny you, but offer an amendment." He clearly dislikes the idea of having to offer a compromise but will do so regardless.

"Oh?"

"Rather than the act of saving, or being saved, a willing kiss. You care for them both, and in a manner that would not illicit jealousy damaging to their bond." He looks her in the eye "You may never integrate fully, or you might form ties that have the bond grow to encompass all three of you. Either way, Harry needs to understand connections to others in a way he would not toss aside prior to his memories returning; anything less is unsafe, and you would not cause damage by being a part of such."

Blinking rapidly, Luna takes in that her - unofficial - reaper is effectively telling her to create a relationship with both Hermione and Harry. Not that she's opposed to the idea, for either of them, it's just surprising, sufficiently so that she responds with a well articulated;

"Huh?"

"Make a happy relationship with Potter and Granger, Kiss, they get memories back," Hubert explains, in a much simpler manner.

Luna nods, then she smiles, "Ok! I accept this amendment!" At her words, Hubert taps the contract, which alters slightly to accept the new requirements of returning her friend's memories.

"Now, about when you'll go back... We can't send you back too far before your first year, so, sadly you won't be able to prevent the Weasley from being friends with Potter. We could place you on the train?"

"No! Diagon, shopping trip."

"You want to catch the Diary?"

"No." He gives her a surprised look "Harry always survives the Basilisk, right?"

"Yes, he does, it's a fixed event if it happens. Everyone he takes into the chamber comes out alive, if he doesn't end up in there alone, which is what is pushed to happen."

"And people dying to the Basilisk is really weird - so better let the Diary go somewhere normally, catch it and turn it in as a dark artefact we found. That way Dumbledore won't be suspicious, and Ronald can be pushed away."

Hubert's finds this thought quite curious, "How so?"

"He nearly bails because of Harry getting called the heir of Slytherin, won't take much to push him into saying something stupid. If he leaves on his own, I can work on the others to be less comfortable with him when he comes back." She gives a little smile "Maybe even have them ditch him before the tournament, if not, he won't be welcomed back after he bails on that.

Hubert starts nodding, then abruptly stops, "You'd let the tournament happen? No arguing that it's unnecessary?"

"Well, if Voldemort never comes back, the death eaters never get exposed again, Britain remains mired in bigotry, and bad things happen right?"

Hubert can't help but grin "Yes, correct. If the bigotry in magical Britain continues apace, by the year 2060 the barrier between mundane and magical collapses in an unfortunate manner, igniting a war that effectively ends the world. The Apocalypse."

"All these resets make more sense now." Luna's playing with her hair, smiling to herself as she goes over her memories of Harry and Hermione, thinking about how nice it would be to see them together - to see them together, and be allowed to be close to them as they are together.

"Discovering that Destiny is being thwarted and the world is going to end has many of us working overtime, in triple time." Hubert sounds tired, unsurprisingly as he is one of those who has to work in triple time. He quickly makes a note to send pudding up to the office during the meeting later/earlier.

"So," He moves back to business "Diagon alley, I'll place you the day before the Weasleys do their shopping. Do you want hat influence?"

"Hat influence?"

"The sorting hat, if we place a marker on you, you'll end up in a specific house."

"Gryffindor. Ravenclaw has never been very good to me, and I'd like to think I'm brave." Luna doesn't quite believe she's brave enough for the lions, but if she's offered the chance she'll jump on it. Even if it means rooming with the Potion Princess.

Maybe she can just sneak into Hermione's bed and avoid the redhead entirely. The hugs would just be an added benefit.

"Very well. I don't think I need to remind you to be careful around the headmaster - even if you are near immune to the Obliviate spell, you are still at risk of other complications. He could choose to pair you off, or act on the others to drive you away."

Luna nods, she will never trust the headmaster. Not after some of the things she remembers seeing; she'll take it slow, making friendships with Harry and Hermione, but be closer to Hermione for a while, which should keep the bearded goat happy with her. A Hermione with more friends is a Hermione less likely to focus utterly on the boy-martyr.

"Good luck Luna Lovegood, I can only hope you are successful."

"Afraid of having to rely on Neville?" Luna finds it amusing that he's gone from finding her frustrating, to actually thinking she's going to do well; at least she has the advantage of knowing how it went wrong for the others.

"The personality shift is too great, too public, he would get caught far too easily," Hubert replies, sadly.

"Goodbye, Hubert."

"Goodbye, Miss Lovegood."

Luna glows blue briefly, before vanishing in a flash of light, leaving Hubert alone in his offices with a glowing contract, which also shortly vanishes, deep into the record vaults; enacted and irrevocable. Soon Luna Lovegood will descend on Diagon Alley, set on making friends with a bookworm and a shy boy, to give them a better life.

Hopefully, one where their Love is Good.