Here it is everybody, part two and things are going to get quirky in this one, you have been warned! I hope you enjoy!

Wolfgirl2013, I bow to your superior powers of perception. Yep, the whole gang's here!

Labinnacslove, Hellooo! Nice to have you back. Glad you've missed these two and their crazy (and it's going to get a lot more crazy yet!)

Skovko, Um, well, there is definitely a surprise coming, for everyone, but it's probably not what you think. God only knows why my brain made me write this one, but I had a good time doing it if nothing else!

xXBalorBabeXx, Yep, we all know Lauren likes finding trouble and this is no exception. She can literally find trouble anywhere...although this kind might be a little unusual!

Mandy, Want me to send Dean round to dirty deeds whoever was mean to you on the phone? I will. But maybe once he's sorted out Lauren, because we all know that girl keeps his hands kind of full. Glad this story came along when you needed it. I aim to please!

Minnie1015, Aww you know what a girl wants to hear, especially after all of the stressing I had with these two! Glad you missed them, I'm going for something a little bit different in this chapter (although not so different, because it's them after all). What can I say, I watched too many movies in the nineties...

Rescuing The Princess

When I opened my eyes again it was like the light in the room had shifted.

Sunlight – actual sunlight – was streaming through the drapes, which was weird because how long had I been out for and what day was it and why did I feel so weird? Around me the room felt bigger and colder somehow and the fake stone walls seemed suddenly real.

Not that those were my biggest concerns though, because where was my husband?

I sat up in alarm,

"Dean?"

Four solid walls were staring back at me and – hey – where had the crepe paper covered closet gone? Since in its place I could only see a large antique trunk chest and an elegant iron stand filled with candles and –

Candles?

Now where on earth had those things come from?

"Dean?"

Blinking up in no small amount of worry, I turned towards the bathroom battling my dress because –

Oh.

Had I mentioned I was wearing one of those too? As in a real princess gown with lots of layers and floof, in the form of an elegant pale blue overdress and cream underskirts with brocading and swirls, not to mention about a nautical mile of silver thread work, finished off with long, pearl dressed puffy sleeves.

It was a beautiful thing and made me feel like a Disney drawing. But how was I even in it? I didn't recall putting it on. Or even buying the thing for that matter.

Hmmm.

"Um, Dean?" I tried hopefully again, frowning round the room, "Did – did something maybe happen overnight? I mean did we switch hotels without me knowing and – this part might sound crazy – but why am wearing a dress?"

I looked towards the bathroom, or at least where it had been, since that too had gone with everything else. Including my brand new pantsuit and my husband.

I swallowed,

"Um, okay kind of freaking out now."

Fighting the folds of my dress – which was still beautiful but clearly not designed for the climbing up off beds – I trampled across the cold and unforgiving flagstones, which at some point had replaced the old stained carpet in the night and then flung open the door out onto the hallway to reveal a stone staircase.

Yep.

Really really freaking out.

"Dean are you down there?" I called into the darkness, flinching a little as my voice echoed back. But I definitely could hear someone or something at the bottom and so I figured it probably had to be Dean, since no way would he leave me in a super weird castle.

Because he loved me too much, right?

I sucked in a breath then unhooked one of the tapering candles and picked up the hem of my impractical dress, before starting down the steps with my heart on my tongue tip. Because what if there was a fire breathing dragon at the end? Or, ooh, how about a super secret torture dungeon? Only not one of the good ones like in Fifty Shades of Grey.

Oh god oh god.

I nearly had a full conniption, although luckily it turned out to be neither of those, since instead the steps lead down to a doorway which I pushed open slowly at the sound of a voice and spat me out into a baronial looking throne room, with super tall windows and a banquet all prepared. Oh and also two figures stood beside the long table.

Oh crap.

It was Hunter and Steph.

Each of them was wearing a crown and crushed velvet and talking with someone perched on one of the chairs, but whoever it was had their back turned towards me, so I couldn't quite see them. But it certainly wasn't Dean. Noticing me stood there they spun in my direction and –

Smiled?

"Lauren," Hunter grinned throwing out his arms, "There you are sweetheart I'm glad you're awake at last. Can't have my daughter sleeping through her big day."

I blinked back at him for a second like he was speaking another language.

Because excuse me?

"Big day?"

"Of course," he chuckled back, "Don't tell me you forgot?"

"Um," I frowned, "F-forgot what exactly?"

How they had drugged me and then basically locked me up? Or how my wicked stepmother had tried to run me over? Or how about the way they had let Randy pin me down? Or the way they had made Seth turn his back on us?

Because yep, I remembered those things pretty well. Although apparently our beef wasn't exactly what he was getting at.

Stephanie huffed,

"Hunter please," she clicked her tongue at him, before coming round the table to put her hands on my arms, which I flinched at expecting her talons to follow and then frowning when they didn't.

Wait. Was she being sincere?

Reaching up she brushed a loose hand through my tresses and then scrunched her nose sweetly,

"Poor Lauren just woke up, so you can hardly expect her to remember her wedding."

I coughed in surprise,

"I-I'm sorry, my what?"

"Your wedding," Steph repeated like I'd misheard the wording and not the insane basic premise of it all. In the meantime though she kept stroking my hair through, which was weird but also something that my mom had liked to do and so it felt kind of –

Nice?

"I'm so excited for you Lauren. Your father found you the perfect man. He's strong and handsome and he has excellent prospects."

"Dean?" I blinked.

Because it had to be right? I mean after all, he was already my husband, so it was hardly as if they could have picked someone else and besides, he did have excellent prospects and an excellent body and an excellent face.

Plus you know, dimples.

"Dean?" Stephanie snorted furrowing her brows, "Sweetie, who on earth is Dean?"

"Um he's – ,"

"Ohh," she breathed out suddenly snapping her fingers then prodding me across the floor, closer to Hunter and the man at the table who still remained faceless, "Do you mean your father's guard? Or at least before he went off and joined the rebellion and became an enemy of the Kingdom."

"The kingdom?" I frowned, although honestly I could have spluttered any word from her sentence and still been completely clueless. Rebellion? Your father's guard? Because what had that meant?

Was she talking about The Shield boys?

"But," I blinked, "I already married him."

"Well in that case then you'll just have to unmarry him," Steph beamed back at me like the answer was simple. She dug her nails in too,

Ouch.

King Hunter had a big weathered hand out to greet me and it clamped around my wrist as we pitched up by his side, meaning that with my stepmother gripping my shoulders and him holding my sleeve I was essentially stuck and knowing it my heart started up like a drumbeat. Because when had them grabbing me ever been good?

I struggled,

"But I don't want to unmarry Dean. I love him."

Steph snorted,

"Come on Lauren, this isn't about love, this is about doing what's best for your family and for the family business and besides, like I said, the King has picked you someone with excellent prospects. Lauren meet Randy, the Baron Von Orton of Smackdown."

What?

A cold clammy rush of chilled blood ran clean through me as the man in the chair stood up and turned round.

Because yep –

It was Randy. No two ways about it. Although he seemed to be wearing a historical style moustache, which if possible made the asshole look even more creepy and brutal and smug. Ugh. I hated him so much. I literally wanted to poke both his eyes out and then put them in an envelope and send them miles away, which, okay perhaps wasn't the best revenge ever, but would have been inconvenient so, you know, um ha?

Randy sneered,

"Huh. Well, hello there princess. I've gotta say it's nice to finally meet you at last. I've been waiting a long time for this day. A long time."

I shook my head,

"No."

I tried to back up but faltered as Stephanie and Hunter held me tighter. Because how could this be happening for an actual second time? We had already done it. We had won.

I yelled at them,

"No. You can't make me. I hate you. Let go of me – ,"

Randy grabbed my chin,

"I can't make you, huh? Well we'll see about that, because I will be the King and you will sit beside me and nobody can stop that."

"Wanna bet jackass?"

Huh?

We all spun around like the cast of a screwball comedy to find a lean figure silhouetted in the door, wearing a long and super sexy black tabard with a three headed dog motif snarling on the front and with his copper hair scruffy but no less gorgeous for it.

Dean.

My heart sang with it — briefly.

"Guards," Hunter bellowed in a low but panicked timbre and at once more doors burst open wide and a million Authority troops poured through them. Only weirdly they all looked exactly like Seth, or like something from The Matrix or Attack or the Clones maybe as they swept towards my husband and his glittering sword, because –

Ooh.

He had a sword.

Rude euphemisms filled my headspace, since apparently I was still just an overgrown child and I sniggered which briefly made everyone look at me. Dean, the King and Queen and all the creepy clone Seths.

Dean blinked at me,

"Jesus Christ. It's because of the sword isn't it?"

Awww. He knew me so well.

I bit my lip.

"Yes?"

"Princess are you seriously – ,"

But whatever else he was going to say to me was abruptly cut off by a sudden loud shout, as Queen Stephanie the Brutal screeched banshee style across the table and then pointed at my husband.

"Kill all of them."

All?

I felt my heart flip over in horror as the Seth army let out a nasally sneer then began to pour forward like a flood of two toned hairstyles.

I struggled like a wild thing in Randy's grip,

"No – ,"

Because how had I gone from a crummy hotel room on my wedding night to this? I mean whatever this was. Being held in a castle with my outnumbered husband and my very worst enemies?

Dean met the first Seth with a parry head on – which was frankly about the only fencing term I knew for certain – and then kicked the second Seth right in the balls, which didn't have a special name other than ouchie. He was fighting like crazy but he was losing the battle fast. Because holy crap how were there so many Seth clones and all of them sneering and being assholish?

Ugh.

It would take a literal miracle to beat them or –

"Oooooooh wah."

I blinked.

Or okay,maybe that. Because for a second it has sounded sort of strangely like Roman and –

"Yes," I crowed as he bowled through the door, followed by most of the Authority hating locker room, with everyone from Dolph Ziggler to Cody Rhodes in tow and even including what looked like The Big Show. Although he seemed to have turned into an ogre at some point. All big and green with a sizeable underbite and a couple of mismatched crooked teeth poking out. He ducked beneath the door and then knocked fifteen Seths out as Roman promptly speared through another two more and at which point the illustrious King and Queen chose to scarper.

Randy too.

"Move Princess, you're coming with me."

"No," I wrapped my hands around one leg of the table in a super badly thought out sort of a sprawl on the floor, which Randy countered easily by simply lifting me upright and then throwing me over his shoulder. Yep, bad plan, "Let me go."

"Damn it, stop struggling," he barked in frustration as I hammered like a rock and roll drummer on his back, but which was lessened by how restrictive the corset of the dress was. No wonder Disney Princesses needed a Prince sometimes.

"Dean."

As my damselesque scream echoed round the great chamber, I watched him pop up over the army of Rollins heads and then widen his eyes in a bolt of pure panic and a hiss of frustration.

Or, okay, a curse word.

"Shit."

Kicking a door open Randy started up a staircase with me trying hard to dig my nails into the brick and watching as Dean got smaller and smaller and then lost in the crush of flailing bodies and fists.

"Put me down Randy," I yelled, punching hard at his kidneys in the hopes that maybe I could somehow rupture one, or at the very least make him pee blood for a few weeks, but because of the padded doublet he didn't seem much to mind.

God I hated his hands being on me.

Ick.

I shuddered,

"I said put me down. Put me down now, by order of the princess,"

Because after all I did have royal blood, while Randy was only a lowly ass baron and so that had to count for something, right?

Randy snorted at me,

Nope.

"Oh, so you want me to put you down, is that right?"

"Yes," I hissed as he kicked open another door and then suddenly flipped me back over his shoulder so that I landed on the cold hard flagstones butt first and with a shriek of fright. Dear god he was an absolute asshole and also, ouch.

A gust of wind ruffled my hair and I blinked and then looked around for the first time, because were we out on the ramparts?

Yes.

Evidently yes we were.

Battlements stretched out on four sides all around us, looking out over a landscape of fields and trees, but broken up by each of the towering turrets set beneath a blue sky – hey – like the one back in the room.

"Now, where were we princess?"

Randy stepped in towards me and I scrambled to my feet nearly tripping on the dress, before drawing a sword out – huh, where had that come from – and then pointing it determinedly up in Randy's face. I meant it before when I had said I was badass. Snow White and Cinderella had nothing on me. Even though Mulan was totally braver. I mean, she had saved China after all.

Randy snorted then went to brush past me like he was possibly late to catch a passing bus, which seemed unlikely since we were perched on the ramparts and besides, the public transport there probably sucked.

"Please," he sneered, "Put that down before you hurt yourself."

"How about I hurt you?"

I flicked the blade against his chin and he hissed and then quickly tapped his fingers to the paper cut since – ooh go me – I had actually drawn blood.

In response Randy smiled but it wasn't a nice thing, since nothing about him would ever be nice and then let loose an impressed sounding chuckle.

"So this is how you want it?"

"Yep," I lowered into a sword pose, "I won't marry you Randy, so you'll have to kill me first."

He drew out his own sword which, okay, was a big one and no that was not a euphemism.

Yuck.

"Don't tempt me princess," he ground out darkly before ducking to one side and then slashing across. I blocked it with a grin like a natural swording wonder. Or, no like Geena Davis in that nineties pirate film, which frankly, I had always felt was underrated. It was a super good movie. I parried again, then twirled out of the way to block an incoming thrust move, before possibly getting a bit carried away as our blades clashed again and we came face to face behind them.

"So, still think I'll hurt myself?"

He smirked at me,

Ugh.

"I don't think, I know you will," he offered back smugly, his vile breath wafting in over my face, "Because princess you have no idea what you're playing with."

"Um, would the answer be a jackass?"

He shunted me back and then stepped on the bottom of my extra long dress hem which dumped me boob first into the battlement wall and then down onto the floor in a bundle with a two foot thick machicolation at my back. My sword skittered off and I scrambled to grab it, only to find Randy's sabre point on my throat and so I seized up bodily then glared up towards him.

God he looked smug.

"So princess," he smirked, "Would you still rather die than be the Baroness von Orton?"

"Rot in hell asshole."

He sighed,

"I'll take that as a yes. Shame though, we could have done a lot of things together," he drew the sword back for the final killing movement and I squeaked then clamped my eyes tight shut, because, oh god, this was it, "Goodbye princess."

CLANG.

Huh?

I blinked up in shock to find the back of a tabard and –

Were those jeans underneath?

Not that it mattered.

"Dean," I grinned, partly because he'd not been butchered by Seth clones, but mostly because he had slid into the space, knocking Randy's sabre away from my body and saving me like always.

Oh, I mean when I wasn't being cool and extra badass that was.

"Thought I told you to stay away from my wife last time asshole," he growled in his lowest and sexiest tones. Or at least they were sexy to me. Super sexy. Though I doubted that Randy felt the same way.

Gross.

He snorted at me,

"This?" he sneered across the distance, as Dean put out a hand and helped me clamber to my feet, "This is what you're turning me down for? A dirty looking street dog?"

Dean launched across the space, knocking the sabre clean out of Orton's fingers as the sword fight promptly broke down into a brawl, which was where my husband felt most happy as he straddled my kidnapper and pummelled his jaw.

Honestly I felt like cheerleading for him.

Go Dean.

Except suddenly I was ever so slightly distracted by something coming closer in the sky overhead. Like some sort of bird, but a whole lot bigger and with the sun flush behind so it was kind of hard to see. What was that? A stork, or an eagle or a buzzard? Or maybe even a –

Dragon.

It was a dragon.

"Um, Dean?"

"Not now Princess," he grunted in response to me as I trampled across the stones and then tapped him on the back, although I shivered at the way he grumbled out Princess, because god it felt good to hear it lovingly again, "I'm kinda in the middle of fuckin' killin' an asshole."

"But Dean," I hissed as the creature flapped in close, to reveal a forked tongue and green scales and a face like Stephanie.

Ha.

I knew it looked like her.

Picking up my sword I ran right towards her but she swished her tail round and knocked me onto my back before digging her talons deep into my shoulders and shaking me as I flailed and tried to kick out.

"No, get off me – ,"

"Princess?" Dean called from somewhere, but he sounded far away which was weird, "Princess wake up."

Dragon Steph shook me again and in response to her I launched up the best punch I feasibly could and clocked something soft and almost human flesh feeling.

"Fuck."

Huh? I blinked at the sound of the shout and suddenly the light flooding round me changed again and the sun and the ramparts and the dragon all faded. Because instead there was only a bed and me and Dean, who was cupping his nose on the mattress beside me and grumbling.

"Holy fuck."

Had I hit him?

Ooh crap.

"Oh god, did I get you? I'm so sorry. Let me look at it," sitting up swiftly I pulled his hands down, using the folds of his warm leather jacket and – hey where had his sexy black Shield tabard gone? I gabbled too, groggily, "I – I was trying to hit Stephanie – or well, not Steph, because she was more kind of a dragon thing – and only because you were busy fighting Orton and besides, you were tired from all of the Seths and – ,"

"Princess, whoa," Dean buttoned my lips up and then blinked at me, "Lauren, in what the hell are you talkin' about?"

"B' webellion 'gainst King Hunter and 'Tephanie," I mumbled back at him, before having to suck in some drool since talking around pinned lips was not attractive.

But I frowned too though because how could he not know?

"Princess," he grunted, "It was a freakin' dream baby."

"A what?" I squeaked as he offered back a nod. Oh and also decided to let my lips go which was slightly more helpful.

"You were shoutin' an' wavin' your arms around. I was tryin' to wake you up when you freakin' creamed me in the schnoz here."

I blinked at him.

A dream?

But it had all seemed so real. I mean, except for the dragon that looked like Stephanie and the fact that Randy had been sporting a moustache and the army of Seth clones and The Big Show being an ogre and the whole castle bit and –

Okay. So perhaps it was a dream. With the exception of King Hunter and Bitchy Queen Steph though, since that was our waking reality from day to day.

Dean rubbed his nose and I winced at him,

"Oopsie."

"Hell of a way to start our weddin' night off," he smirked before snorting, "Although did anyone ever tell ya, you throw a mean right hook?"

"I had a good teacher," I shrugged in response, meaning him and knowing it he snorted and then turned on the mattress to catch me in a kiss. A sweet one at first but which got deeper pretty rapidly as his hand slipped round my back to pull me against his abs and as my fingers crept up and flattened over his torso.

Leaning against me we toppled down onto the bed and I broke the kiss to squeak a happy little note out as he resumed his earlier position on top.

My husband.

Mmm.

His blue eyes sparkled down at me as he dipped his head lower to nip at my jaw before rumbling a low and super husky sounding grunt loose as I teased across the hair at the back of his neck.

I was so lucky.

"So then what's the freakin' plan here?" he murmured at me, his lips grazing my ear and making me shiver right through way through my body, "Am I rescuin' the princess?"

I grinned,

"You already have."

There you go, they are officially back.

Next week I have a brand new Lauren and Dean story coming (the one I promised you all those months ago) which I'm aiming to post up next Wednesday/Thursday, so if you're interested, I hope to see you there when normal service will resume (with no castles and no dragons, but lots of drama and being cute!)

Can't wait!