Author's Note:

Hello lovely readers, another fresh batch of Darvey angst for you. I just love that pre-canon yearning.

After several attempted phone calls the night before, Thomas finally answers early Friday morning.

"Donna, I'm on my way to the office."

She presses on, despite his icy tone.

"I hate the way we left things last night."

He sighs on the other end of the phone.

"How would you like me to handle that revelation?" he asks, frustrated. "I was humiliated."

"I know and I'm so so sorry you had to find out that way."

"And why did I find out that way, Donna?"

"Thomas, it's ancient history."

A wave of guilt washes over her as she thinks of their kiss last year. Ancient history might be a stretch.

"You let me sit there, while everybody at the table knew about you two but me."

"You wanted to have dinner with him," she reminds him.

He lets out a hollow laugh. "And no wonder you were dead against it."

"I didn't want something like this to happen."

"Which you could have avoided if you just told me," he fires back.

"It's not exactly something you can just bring up."

Donna has grown so used to burying that facet of their relationship. She thinks of Harvey's sentiment the night before; defining their relationship to other people has always been loaded and complicated. But it's the relationship that has always driven a wedge between her and the other men in her life. Mark, Stephen, Mitchell…

"You could have told me after I met him."

"Thomas, we'd only been dating for a few weeks. I wasn't about to unload that on you."

There's a heavy pause.

"Unload? That's an odd choice of words."

"Thomas, please. You're reading way too much into this."

"Actually Donna, I think I'm finally getting the full picture."

"There is no 'full picture', Harvey and I are colleagues," she stresses.

There's another uncomfortable pause. Then, "Donna, I think we both know that if that were true, you wouldn't have kept this from me."

Thomas abruptly ends their phone call.

"Fuck."

It's a brisk, chilly morning but Harvey keeps pushing his body, weaving through Central Park, stopping only once to let a few bikers pass him. He slept poorly the night before, mind occupied with thoughts of Donna and everything he wanted to say to her when they were finally alone in her apartment. The run is somewhat invigorating, even if he'll feel the ache in his calves when he finally strolls into the office.

He treads the familiar path back to his building, eager for a shower. He almost does a double take when he says Thomas waiting outside for him.

He might envy Thomas, but the man doesn't intimidate him in the slightest. Harvey's dealt with far more combative, aggressive characters over the years.

"Thomas, what are you doing here?"

"Waiting for you."

There are no traces of the forced pleasantries from last night.

"Look, I don't know what you came here for–"

"Answers," he says simply.

"Shouldn't you be having this conversation with Donna?"

"Well, Donna seems to think your relationship is in the past."

Harvey doesn't react. Thomas purses his lips, then fixes Harvey with a hard stare.

"I know better."

"No offence Thomas, but you know nothing about me. And as last night proved, you also know nothing about my relationship with Donna."

Harvey skirts around the man, fishing his keys out of his pocket.

"So, enlighten me."

Harvey turns to address him again, acutely annoyed.

"I don't owe you anything."

"No, but we're both in love with my fiancée so maybe we can speak honestly for five minutes."

Harvey almost gapes at him. "I guess we can."

"You've been in each other's lives a long time and I can't compete with that kind of history."

"No, you can't," Harvey agrees.

"But I'm offering a life with her, without any reservations. And my guess is you've never been able to do that."

Harvey rears back. For a guy he barely knows, Thomas has been able to pinpoint him with startling accuracy.

"I'm not stupid, I know there's something between the two of you, even if you haven't acted on it for years. And I can make peace with that, because Donna and I are going to have the rest of our lives together."

The thought makes Harvey queasy.

"She's amazing, Harvey," Thomas says. "But you're not good for her."

The words reverberate in his ears; an acknowledgment of something he's always feared.

"Maybe it's time you realised that and let her go."

Thomas doesn't wait for a response as he leaves Harvey on the outskirts of his building, filled with dread.

Harvey readies himself for work on autopilot, still reeling from his run-in with Thomas. He's late getting to the office; tense, distracted and under-caffeinated. Donna's office is empty, but he spots her coat and bag, so he knows she's here.

After last night, there's only one place she'd be other than her office.

He finds her in the file room, hovering over the paper shredder. He watches her a moment, her face passive while she completes the monotonous task of shredding.

"Old habits die hard, huh?" he asks, announcing himself.

She startles slightly, then recovers, "These are sensitive documents." She straightens a new pile of documents and feeds them into the shredder. "I wasn't going to pass this off to any associate."

Harvey is quickly by her side, peering over her shoulder.

"Really? Because it looks like you're shredding scrap paper. Which, other than being a huge waste of paper, is also a huge waste of time."

He feels Donna tense, and he knows he's crossing another one of those physical boundaries. He steps back, clearing his throat.

"You only shred when you're trying to avoid me."

Off her expression, he says, "I know things about you too."

"I'm not avoiding you," she says, reaching for another pile. "I'm avoiding everyone."

"I'm sorry about last night," he says earnestly.

"I really don't want to talk about it."

Donna moves to add another pile to the shredder but Harvey lays his hand on hers, urging her to stop. She relinquishes the pile and Harvey dumps it by the printer.

"Donna, I…don't want to complicate your life."

"Last night wasn't your fault, Harvey."

"But I didn't help."

Donna breathes out a shaky sigh, reluctantly meeting his eyes.

"See, that's the thing, Harvey, it doesn't matter how solid my relationship is – with any guy – sooner or later you seem to come between us."

Harvey rears back. "Are you blaming me for your failed relationships?"

"I'm not trying to single you out," she explains. "I'm also blaming me for yours."

"Paula."

"Among others."

She means Scottie, of course. Harvey thinks about the last time they saw each other, just before he found out Donna and Thomas were dating. Scottie knows him better than most. She could plainly see his feelings for Donna long before he could.

"You said yourself last night that I was the reason things didn't work out with Paula."

"I also said we had other problems."

"Well, she made you choose between a romantic relationship with her and a professional one with me."

"And I stand by my choice. Things with Paula…they weren't right from the start. There was always an imbalance, like she knew me better than I knew her. Because of that, I pushed for something serious, even though I didn't feel the way about her that I was supposed to."

A beat passes between them.

"Harvey, why are you telling me this?"

"Because I've seen you with Thomas. You two are good for each other," he tells her, repeating Thomas' words.

Donna's eyes bore into his. "You really believe that?"

"I do."

And he means it, even though it almost kills him to get the words out. As much as he wants this moment for himself, to be selfish, to finally tell her he's hopelessly in love with her, he also wants her to be happy. And Thomas already does that for her.

"Thanks, Harvey."

"I promise I won't give him a hard time at the next dinner party."

Donna scoffs, while he forces a smile.

"I better go," he tells her. "I need to play mediator between Samantha and Alex."

"Again?"

"The fun never stops."

Harvey steals one last glance at her before leaving the file room.

"It's been a weird twenty-four hours."

"Your message sounded frantic. Tell me everything."

It's a relief to see Rachel's face – even if it's only via video call. Donna bundles herself up in her cardigan and adjusts her camera.

"Sorry about that. I keep forgetting the time difference."

Rachel waves her off. "Don't even worry about it, I'm getting up in the middle of the night to pee, like, all the time now."

Donna's eyes scan Rachel's living room through the screen.

"Is Mike there with you?"

"No, he just left to pick up food."

"Okay, good."

Rachel quirks an eyebrow. "I take it Harvey features heavily in today's events."

"You're too smart for your own good."

"What happened, Donna?"

"Last night's dinner was a mess…"

Donna unpacks the evening for her best friend, who seems to mull over every detail as if she were studying a case file, keeping her opinions to herself until she has all the facts.

"Honey, I get why Thomas is mad, but everybody has a past."

"But normally that past doesn't sit down and have dinner with you."

"Okay, maybe you should have told Thomas before last night, but I agree that there's never a great time to share that news."

"He sounded so hurt this morning, Rach. I left him a message this afternoon, but I'm trying to give him time and space to process."

It goes against Donna's nature; she likes to hash everything out, dissect an argument until it's over.

"I know I've only met him a handful of times, but it's clear that he loves you. Louis is right, he will get over this."

Donna nods.

"I just…"

"What is it sweetie?"

"Harvey and I were talking today."

"About?"

"Our lousy relationship history," she lets out with a laugh.

Rachel gives her a look of sympathy.

"It doesn't matter how well it's going for us with other people, there always comes a point where our friendship becomes a problem."

"And you're worried your relationship with Harvey is always going to be a touchy subject?"

Donna sighs, toying with the hem of her cardigan.

"I'm worried because there's a reason we keep choosing each other."

She doesn't realise she's crying until she hears Rachel's voice.

"Oh, Donna."

"I'm sorry, Rachel. I don't want to burden you with this."

"Hey, it's not a burden. I may be pregnant and two-and-a-half thousand miles away, but I'm still your best friend, okay?"

Donna smiles through her tears.

"I thought I'd moved on from this, but lately, I feel like he's finally..." she trails off.

"It's okay to have doubts," Rachel says, diplomatic as ever, "marriage is a huge step."

"You didn't have doubts."

"Well not the second time," Rachel reminds her.

There's a brief silence while Donna ponders over her words.

"He's a part of me," she confesses. "And sometimes I forget – when we're not talking, or we're fighting – but then we're alone and we're us again and I remember why we're so important to each other."

"Donna, I know I told you to be happy, but if you still feel this way, you need to be honest with Thomas."

The sound of Rachel's front door cuts through their call.

"I'll let you go, Rach," she says, wanting to avoid explaining her tear-stained cheeks to Mike. "Say 'hi' to your baby daddy for me."

Rachel smiles, waving goodbye.

"Okay, I will. Call me in a few days," she says, before adding, "I love you."

"Love you too."