I Want You to be Happier

Going back, it was supposed to stop the end of the world. Bring back Pogo, Mom, Ben, and even Dad (the bastard). It should have fixed everything, made them whole again. Yet… It hadn't. Really, it'd just given them a whole new set of problems to deal with. New trials that would twist and bend and break them apart given enough time.

Worst of all, Vanya didn't remember. Anything. Like, at all. They were all strangers to her. She knew nothing about the world. Somehow, though, she was still Vanya. Almost inexplicably so, she knew how to play the violin (and damn did listening to her play bring back flashbacks of the end of the world). She remembered their preferences, like that Number Five ate peanut butter and marshmallow sandwiches and she would always have one waiting for him after a mission along with other ones personalized to the tastes of the rest of them. Even without knowing what her relationship with their father had been like, Vanya would sometimes stare at him. Desperate, hopeful, fingers twisting in her jacket as she almost seemed to plead for him to give her just a glance, a scrap of attention. Some kind of indication he'd didn't find her worthless like he said he did.

They'd never been a good team, even before everything went to shit and all of the bad blood. For Vanya, though, they were trying. They covered for her so Dad never suspected a thing was off (not that they probably needed to, Dad never paid her much mind) and taught her stuff she ought to know but didn't anymore. They tried to figure out ways to spark a memory in her— All of which failed so far, but Allison (and Luther by extension) was insistent they keep trying. He thought it was stupid to keep attempting to force it, but had only said so once out loud. The way Allison had reacted taught him not to again. Most of all, this time they made sure to include her wherever they could. It'd been the isolation that ruined her before and they were determined to not let it happen all over again. Vanya seemed to thrive under all of their attention, but it was becoming clearer with time she was growing suspicious.

Vanya was… Well, not ordinary. The end of the world had taught them that much, but she was also not stupid. Even if all her memories were gone, impressions remained and she seemed to know something was up. That things weren't quite right. This was only growing more obvious as the days went on. Yesterday he'd caught her staring at herself in a mirror with a strange look on her as she brushed a finger around her mouth.

"Vanya, what are you doing?" he'd asked her, curious, but amused too.

Absently, she'd turned her head and looked at him. "Oh, hi Diego."

"Hi."

"When you look in the mirror, do you ever think you don't look right? I… I don't know what it is, but every time I do, I feel like I'm looking at a stranger." Vanya had turned away from the mirror and smiled at him, though, it was confused and uncertain. "It probably will sound dumb, but I keep thinking I should be a woman with lines starting around my mouth, not a thirteen-year-old with bangs."

Diego had swallowed the lump of guilt in the back of his throat and whispered, his voice hoarse, "I think we all feel like that sometimes."

This answer appeared to have confused her as she had turned her attention back to the mirror before gently grabbing him by his elbow and pulling him right up next to her. "Really?" she'd asked him. "How do you think you're supposed to look when that happens?"

Diego realized then he might be in hot water with the others for this, but he hadn't been able to stop himself. The lies were getting to him. While feeling ignored, unwanted, and lesser had definitely been what led Vanya down her villainous path, the lies hadn't help either. Reaching up, he traced where the scar starting above his ear used to be and told his sister, "Sometimes, I think a scar should be here." He then tapped his eyebrow. "And a little one here. Other times, that I should have a beard and a mustache."

Vanya had giggled, sounding entirely thirteen for a moment. "A mustache? I don't know, Diego. Do you really think you could pull that off?"

He'd stood a little bit straighter, offended, but only just. "Better than you pull off bangs!"

The brightness in Vanya's eyes faded as her fingers went to her bangs and gaze to the mirror. "They do look dweeby, don't they?"

Realizing his joke had been mistaken as an insult, Diego had shaken his head and put a hand on her shoulder. "No, I was kidding. They suit you, really, Vanya."

His sister looked at him with the same desperate hopefulness she often eyed Dad with. "Yeah?"

"Yeah."

For a brief moment, she'd looked uncertain again, but then leaned in and quickly hugged him. "Thanks," she whispered before skittering back and saying, "I'll see you at dinner, I have to go practice my violin."

Diego had watched her leave in miffed silence and stood there for a couple of minutes after, glancing at himself in the mirror and at where Vanya had just been as he tingled from the warmth of her hug. It was then he knew that they had to tell her. Vanya deserved more than just their love and attention, she deserved honesty.

-o-O-o-

"No! Absolutely not!" Allison yelled as she shot up from Luther's bed.

Number Five hopped off Luther's desk and hushed her. "Shh! Keep your voice down, you'll wake Vanya or Mom. Or God forbid, Dad."

Allison had hunched her shoulders and frowned before she reluctantly sat back down next to Luther. The blond awkwardly put a hand on her shoulder and said, "Let's give them the chance to explain." He looked over at Diego, eyes threatening as he remarked, "I'm sure Diego has a good reason he'd want to do something so dangerous."

He scowled at their "leader" and snapped, "Yes, I have a fucking good reason!"

"Say it would you, I want to sleep," moaned Klaus from where he was at the foot of Luther's bed, leaned against Ben.

Diego bared his teeth at his brother before taking a deep breath. Finally, he said, "Vanya doesn't remember things, but she still knows stuff." He paused to look at all of them, Luther's expression was impatient, Allison annoyed and disgruntled, while Klaus didn't look to even be paying attention as Ben stared back at Diego blankly. It was only Number Five who looked the least bit interested in what he was saying as he'd leaned in to listen. "She already feels like she isn't right when she looks in the mirror, I can only imagine how she feels when she looks at us when we're being nice and including her in shit."

"I haven't seen Vanya smile so much ever!" Allison argued. "She's happy when we hang out with her."

"Did I say she wasn't?" Diego snarled.

Number Five broke in and said, "Get to the point, Number Two. We don't have all night." That was a lie. They had all the time in the fucking world now— Or it felt like it, anyway. Number Five was sure it was only a matter of time before the Commission came after them again after all the messing with time and the timeline they had done. Diego didn't really care, they'd be ready if and when they did.

"What I'm saying is that a little honesty might be in order if we don't want a repeat of the end of the world."

"That's never going to happen!" argued Allison.

Diego crossed his arms and laughed. "Oh yeah?" he sneered. "You don't think in ten, fifteen, eighteen years when she finds out we've lied to her about who we all are and our pasts she won't feel betrayed and misled and go crazy and try and kill us all in retribution? I hate to tell you this, Allison, but's she not stable."

"That's enough," Luther said, which Diego scoffed at. "Telling her could go badly too," he countered. "What if she wants to use her powers? We could cause the end the world all over again."

"She just needs someone to teach her how to use them," Diego argued. "She's powerful, but Vanya's responsible. She could do it!"

"This still sounds dangerous and like more trouble than we need right now," Luther muttered.

"Diego's right," broke in Number Five.

They all looked at him with varying degrees of shock and surprise. "Vanya is dangerous," he agreed, "but the only way to keep her from being a danger to us and the world is to teach her." He looked at Diego then. "And he's right. She could end the world again if we keep this from her. I don't know about you all, but I didn't do all of this just to watch everyone die again. At least if we say something and teach her we can all say we gave it our best shot."

Luther sighed. From the way his jaw was clenched, it was clear to not only Diego, but everyone in the room he wasn't happy. Even so, he said, "Fine, you win. We'll tell Vanya tomorrow."

Allison, brows knitted together, asked, "What are we going to tell her? You know, for why we didn't say anything earlier?"

Luther opened his mouth, only to close it and frown. Diego felt as at a loss for an explanation too and Number Five didn't look like he had an answer either. Surprise of all surprises, it was Klaus who suggested, "Just say we were hoping she'd remember everything on her own, but since it's been almost three weeks…" he trailed off and shrugged. "It's almost true." His eyes darted between all of their faces as he asked, "Right? It's not just me that's been hoping she'd just remember everything if we did the right thing or said the magic word?"

The rest of them exchanged a few glances and nods. It sounded like a good idea and Klaus was right, they had all been hoping she'd remember on her own by now. It was just too bad she hadn't. If only they knew why she'd forgotten in the first place. No one had a clue why she had, though Number Five had hypothesized that maybe the events leading up to the end of the world and the end itself had been so traumatic for Vanya her mind decided to protect her from it and block it and her past from her conscious until she was in a better mindset to cope with it all. If that was true, Diego wondered when Vanya would feel safe enough for her mind to start to let her remember.

It probably wouldn't be until she felt like she could really trust them. For that to happen, though, Diego was sure she needed them not just love her like they always should have, but tell her the truth about herself. The good and the ugly.

"Who will tell her?" Ben piped up.

Everyone froze. That hadn't ever been something Diego thought about when he came up with this idea. He'd just known she needed to know everything as they do. He looked over at Luther. "That should be your job, don't you think? Since you're our leader and all," he said, unable to keep all of his derisiveness out of his town when speaking of his role on their team.

Luther frowned, annoyed and troubled. "I'll do it if everyone agrees," he replied. He scratched the back of his neck. "I just don't know if I'm the best to tell Vanya, we weren't ever too close…" He looked at Allison. "Maybe you? Hearing it from a sister might make it less awful."

Allison frowned and shook her head. "I caused too much of this. I can't."

Number Five made an aggravated sound in the back of his throat. "Then who will tell Vanya?"

"She always liked you," Diego called. "She'd leave you sandwiches and everything after you disappeared."

His brother glowered at him, but neither said yes or no.

"Diego should tell her."

They all looked at Ben. "What?" he all but gasped.

"This was your idea," their brother said. "And… You two were close for a while. You had that band and everything."

Diego gaped. "We were kids then! We haven't been close like that since she wrote that tell-all biography."

"Please, Diego," Allison begged. "Someone has to and even with everything that's happened, she'll probably take it best from you."

He frowned at her and turned his head away. "You didn't want us to say anything at all."

Allison rolled her eyes. "It was a knee-jerk reaction," she grumbled. "I don't want to hurt her anymore, but I know this will be the best for her, us, and the world in the long-run."

Diego still felt unsure. He really didn't believe he was the best for this job. Someone who was good with words and not using them like the knives he threw should do it, but as he looked over his siblings, he realized all of them were even less suited to the task than him. Luther and Vanya weren't ever close, Allison was right about her being too much of the cause of all of this for their sister to take the news well from her, Klaus was… Well, half of everything that came out of his mouth was verbal shit and Vanya knew that— Even now. Ben she'd been okay with, but, again, Vanya wasn't particularly close with him and Number Five while capable and liked by her, wasn't really too good at explaining things. The prick thought he was too good for the rest of them and would probably only be snide and upset her when and if she didn't understand everything he was saying to her immediately.

Diego let his head drop and sighed. When he looked back up, he said, "Fine. I'll tell Vanya."

Allison and Luther smiled in relief as Number Five nodded, pleased, and Ben and Klaus clapped. He smothered a grin. He'd rarely gotten all of his siblings' approval in the past and it was nice to have it for once. Diego hoped he didn't screw this all up when he talked to Vanya the next day.

-o-O-o-

After breakfast and before their lessons for the day, he stopped Vanya from walking out of the kitchen by grabbing her wrist. The girl turned and looked at him with wide eyes as the rest of their siblings filed out of the kitchen. "Can we go talk? I've got something to tell you," he said while Mom hummed in the background as she started to clean the dishes from breakfast.

The confusion was clear in her eyes as Vanya gave a small nod of her head. "Sure, Diego."

Hands in his pockets, he tipped his head toward the window. "Let's go out to the garden."

Vanya followed him out of the kitchen, upstairs, and through the doors to the garden. When they were outside, Diego's eyes went to where Ben's statue should be, but wasn't. Their brother was alive and would continue to be if they could help it. Diego absently scratched his chin. He hoped Ben knew that. He looked away from the spot and shrugged his shoulders, Klaus had probably said as much at some point in the last couple of week. They had quite the bond now after several years of Ben following Klaus around as a ghost.

"Um, Diego?" Vanya mumbled.

He looked behind him and at his sister, who uneasily stared back, fingers twisted in her jacket. He smiled at her, embarrassed he forgot her— Even if it was for only a moment. He gestured to one of the benches near the wall. "Why don't we sit down."

Vanya nodded and, together, they perched side by side on one of the garden's benches. There was an awkward silence between them for a minute as Diego internally cussed himself out upon realizing he had absolutely no idea what or how to tell her about her past. Their pasts. He should have thought about it earlier and put together some sort of plan, but he hadn't, thinking it would be far easier to do this than it was.

"Are you okay?" his sister asked him as she brought a hand up to rests on his shoulder. "You look a little upset."

He gently shrugged her off and smiled. "I'm fine," he said, only to realize that was wrong. He wasn't and nothing was about to be either. Letting the smile run away from his face, he shook his head and said, "Actually, I am kind of upset. There's stuff I have to tell you and I'm not sure how."

"You can just say it however you want, I don't mind," Vanya assured him as she rested her elbows on her knees and her chin in her hands.

Diego stared at her attentive face and sighed. "Okay," he said, "okay." He took a deep breath and then began to tell her everything. It took a while and Vanya's expression changed many times throughout his story. Her face was fixed in a look of horror as he finished the story with the end of the world. Falling quiet, he just stared at Vanya as her horrified expression turned to one of heartbreak. Finally, Diego cleared his throat and asked, "Are you… Okay?"

"I ended the world?" she whispered.

Diego fisted his hands in the shorts of his uniform and dipped his chin.

Vanya's lower lip started to tremble. "It all sounds crazy," she whispered, "but it makes sense kind of." She brought a hand to her eye and wiped away the start of tears as her lip continued to quiver. "I've been having nightmares, but I thought they were just that."

He sat up a straighter. "What? Nightmares? About what?"

His sister turned her gaze out onto the garden and whispered, "Making everyone pay for thinking I was anything but extraordinary."

Diego's heart sank deep into his stomach and he could only stare at Vanya, mouth open and fingers itching for a knife. He wondered what his siblings would do if he decided to kill her and save them from another end of the world scenario. She'd be gone from this plane, but Klaus would still be able to see her, talk to her, wouldn't he? She could still be a part of the family, albeit in a more limited, safer capacity.

Vanya returned her gaze to him, eyes big and sad and anxious. "I didn't like the nightmare," she told Diego. "I love you all, I know I don't remember any of you, but I can feel it," she explained as she briefly pressed a hand over her heart. Voice growing quieter, she said, "The thought of hurting you…" She shivered. "I don't want that to ever happen again," she murmured as she wrapped her arms tightly around herself. "Thank you for telling me, I appreciate it," she said. "Now that I know it's memories and not, well, visions or something, I'm not so worried anymore. I can make sure it doesn't happen again, right?"

He smiled a closed-lip smile at Vanya and grabbed one of her hands, giving it a strong squeeze before he let it go. "Yeah, sis," he replied, "you can."

Vanya smiled back at him with all of her teeth, the relief coming off of her was palpable. Like she had the other day, she leaned in and quickly hugged him before letting him go and standing up from the bench. "Thanks for not hating me too, by the way," she mumbled while looking at her feet. "I caused a lot of trouble and pain for you all."

"No more than we did for you," Diego replied while staring up at Vanya.

She looked out at him from under bangs for a long moment. Then, the start of a smile on her lips, she asked, "You said we had a band?"

Diego looked away as his face heated up. "Yeah…"

"Do you wanna get the band back together?"

He blinked. "It's been years since I played the base," he warned her. "But yeah. Why not, right?"

Vanya beamed and Diego knew he'd made the right decision. Not just about getting the band back together, but telling her about her past. Now that there was nothing hidden between them, they could start to finally heal what had broken between them. This time, things would go right. This time, they'd be a real family. Not just a few of them, but all of them, Luther, him, Allison, Klaus, Number Five, Ben, and Vanya.

I've borrowed some stuff from the comics to expand on their relationships and predict a possible scenario for what could happen next in the series given the cliff-hanger ending we got to season 1.

Thank you for reading everyone!