Author's Note: Just some shippy little ideas that didn't fit in elsewhere. I'm still working on finishing "Serenade," by the way. I own nothing.

The Family Way

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Considering that he had put his sister and sister-in-law through the inconvenience and bother of hosting not only himself, but seven other teenagers, a drunken Huntsman, and one old lady, babysitting little Adrian so Saphron and Terra could have a date night was the least that Jaune could do. While most everyone else had gone about making preparations to move on to Atlas, gathering supplies, Dust and the like, Jaune settled in for an afternoon looking after his precocious little nephew.

As he was helping the toddler build a tower with wooden blocks in the nursery, Jaune was surprised to hear a knock at the door, followed by the appearance of one Weiss Schnee. The white-haired girl looked oddly shy, so Jaune opted to get right to it.

"Hey Weiss. What's up? Is there something you need?"

"Er, yes actually. I… well, I've never had occasion to spend much time with such a young child, and I don't… really know how to care for one. Yang said that the best way to learn is to observe and assist someone else, so…"

Jaune gave her a warm smile. "Of course you can hang out with us. Adrian doesn't mind, does he?"

At that, the little boy clanked a couple of blocks together and made a happy raspberry noise at Weiss's general direction. To the mind of a year old boy, that was the most amazing and hilarious things ever, and he gave great belly laughs and flopping onto his back, stubby legs kicking in the air.

Poor Weiss never stood a chance, falling to her knees next to the baby to coo and play with him. Jaune could almost see the hearts in her eyes. He felt a warm rush spreading from his chest as he watched her be so open and loving, her crystal blue eyes sparkling with unrestrained joy. Jaune knew that, if she ever decided to pursue it, Weiss would make for an amazing mother. As he watched her with his nephew, he took a moment to savor the feeling, and to just feel gratitude that she was alive and well.

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Weiss was having a grand time with little Adrian, slowly sounding out the sounds of letters as she showed them to the boy's wide eyes. Her heart melted as the toddler tried to imitate her, before lapsing back into gurgles, giggles, and monosyllabic phrases like "na!"

Babies were such fun! Why would anyone hire nannies instead of spending their time with them themselves? Look at the little scrunched-up face! Wait, why was his face scrunched up?

A sudden and potent odor offered one particular answer to that. Her eyes watered, and she gasped out a wheeze as she turned to Jaune. "Jaune, he… help!"

"Uh-oh!" Jaune picked up his nephew and confirmed the stink. "Here, I'm going to put him on the changing table. You know about changing diapers?"

Weiss paused. "Um… no, not really." She watched as Jaune quickly took off his armor, gauntlets, and hoodie, revealing a plain black tee-shirt underneath.

"First thing, don't wear anything you can't wash clean. Babies can sometimes… shoot things."

"What?!"

Jaune nodded. "Yep. Seen it. No idea what pressurized liquid poo would do if it got caught in between the plates of my armor, but I can imagine it would be bad. Now, first we get the dirty diaper off of him."

Nothing in Weiss's life experience had prepared her for the absolute nightmare that was the inside of that diaper. Her hands covered her nose and mouth, partially for protection, and also out of shock. Thankfully, Jaune quickly had it bound up in a bag and tossed into a receptacle that was apparently meant for such things.

For his part, Jaune was entirely unphased. "Next, we gotta wipe his bottom. Little buddy needs to be nice and clean!" The last part he said to Adrian, who was busy studying the pattern on the little half-wall lining the table. To Weiss, Jaune said, "Make sure you always wipe front to back, especially with girls." He swiftly cleaned the boy with some diaper wipes, tossing them into the lidded can after the diaper. "Okay, he looks pretty dry, and I don't see any rash, so we can put the new diaper on. See how the tabs fit?"

In a matter of moments, Jaune had taken the stinky, ruinous mess of a dirty diaper and returned Adrian to the clean and happy boy that he had been before the calamity had struck. Weiss was amazed.

"How are you so calm about it?"

"Oh, it's nothing, really. I helped look after my youngest sister after she was born, you know?"

Weiss looked at him. "You're a good man for doing it, anyway."

Jaune waved it off. "I'm really not. Who would let a baby, especially family, sit in their own crap rather than clean it themselves? That's the standard, the bare minimum. You can't really call yourself a man if you won't even change a diaper. Anyway, can you watch him for a minute? I'm gonna go wash my hands."

She nodded her assent, watching him leave the room. "Oh, Adrian," she sighed, picking up the baby and holding him close to her. She knew that Jaune hadn't meant to, but he had pretty much effortlessly annihilated her entire family with his analysis. Try as she might, she couldn't begin to imagine her father bothering to change a diaper, not hers, not anyone's. And as much as it pained her to admit it, her mother was no better in that respect.

Oh, Jacques Schnee was an ass, everyone knew it, but her mother had had no qualms handing her off to nannies, tutors, and keepers, and that was before she had deteriorated. What kind of mother gave up on even attempting to protect her children from Jacques, losing herself to self-pity and the insensate temptations of drink? Didn't she love her? Did poor Whitley even remember her?

Adrian cooed at her, reaching for her face. Weiss opened her eyes to see wet tears dripping onto the baby boy in her arms. "Oh, don't worry baby, everything is fine. You have two mommies who love you dearly, and your uncle Jaune, and more aunties than you'll know what to do with!" She dried the tears from her face with a sleeve, being careful to keep a good grip on Adrian. Weiss held the baby close, as she looked through a window and onto the Argus sunset. "Can I tell you a secret?" She chose to interpret the happy baby noises as proof that she could, in fact, confide in the toddler. " Seeing your uncle Jaune be so family oriented was really attractive to me. He's made of one hundred percent husband material. Don't tell anyone!"

Weiss laughed at her little joke, looking out onto the beautiful streets of Argus. Suddenly, her eyes shot open wide as she felt a pinching and tugging on one of her breasts. Looking down, she saw little Adrian trying to nurse off of her, clearly frustrated by the cloth barrier of her dress.

She may have panicked. A little. How do you pull a baby off of a breast without hurting him? Would he just give up when no milk came out? Oh gods, what if she started lactating?! She'd been feeling maternal that afternoon, but not that damn maternal!

"Jaune! I need your help!"

What if she started lactating and couldn't turn it off? She could practically see Ruby walking up to her with a glass to fill up and dunk her cookies. Yang would be cracking "Weiss-Cream" jokes for the rest of forever!

"What's the-oh, okay," Jaune said as he entered the room and saw Weiss's predicament. "Little guy is hungry, huh?"

"Jaune, what do I do?"

"Just hang tight, Saph left some formula in the fridge, I'll just fill a bottle and get back to you. He'll probably give up soon anyway."

"And in the meantime?"

Jaune just shrugged. "Think pasteurized thoughts?"

"Jaune!"

That he had the unrestricted temerity to laugh as he walked out of the room and down the stairs galled her even more. Weiss swore that if this little Arc-spawn did cause her to lactate, she was going to dump a cup over Arc's head when he least expected it. To her great relief, though, Jaune had been correct in his assessment, and Adrian soon gave up his endeavor with a little pout. A few moments later, Jaune returned with a carefully warmed bottle of formula.

"Here, let's have you feed him, for real this time. Make sure that his head is well-elevated above his feet, and that his belly isn't scrunched in."

With Jaune's assistance, Weiss bottlefed a baby for the first time. She was surprised to find herself leaning against Jaune as they sat comfortably on a couch. Catching the knight without his armor on was a rare occurrence, and Weiss was surprised by how warm and comfortable a support he was. They had clashed in the past, mostly due to their immaturity, but ever since reuniting at Haven, Weiss had found Jaune to be both steadfast support and agreeable company.

He would one day make for an amazing father, of that Weiss had no doubt. Just as she could never imagine Jacques changing a diaper, so too could she never imagine Jaune slapping a daughter of his out of anger, or disowning her for following her dreams. Weiss could practically see him with a couple of white-haired Arcs on his hips, chasing after them in the snow, raising them to be not just strong and smart, but loving and kind too.

Wait, white-haired Arc babies? Where had that thought come from?

As she leaned deeper into Jaune, she considered that, maybe, there were possibilities to the knight that she hadn't considered before…

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Years Later

Saphron smiled as she opened up the files that her little brother and his wife had sent to her. Jaune and Weiss had been happily married for over twelve years, and had had two beautiful children. Their eldest, a tall, lean, white-haired boy named James Schnee, had just begun his initial training as a Huntsman, bearing an elegant, if broad-bladed cut-and-thrust sword, posing proudly with it towards the camera.

Standing beside him, and considerably shorter, was their youngest, a precocious blonde four-year old, Pyrrha. Pyri stood just as proud as her brother, beaming as she wore a saucepan on her head, and carried the lid and a spatula as if they were a sword and shield. Saphron snorted with amusement, remembering that her brother had done the same thing at around that age.

She opened up a video file. It began with Jimmy training in a courtyard under the watchful eye of his aunt Winter, before Pyri stormed onto the scene, wearing her saucepan helmet and swinging her spatula at the older boy with lethal intent. She could make out an amused Weiss in the background, which meant that Jaune had to have filmed this.

"Thwack!" the little girl intoned with deadly seriousness. She continued to thwack her brother, who carefully sheathed his sword and began to dramatically fall to the ground.

"Help me, Auntie Winter! Pyri is just too powerful!"

"Thwack!"

"I'm sorry," Winter deadpanned. "Against some opponents, there can be no defense. Die well, my pupil."

"Remember me as I was!"

On the video, Winter merely raised an eyebrow.

"Okay, then remember me as better than as I was!"

"Thwack!"

With that, the video clip came to an end. Saphron beamed as she added the files to the digital family album she was compiling. It was such a lovely little family her little brother had formed. She couldn't wait for the next reunion.