Summary: Young Link is angry at Toon Link for stealing his spot in the previous roster so during their first battle he taunts him by drinking milk. When the battle runs on for longer than he expected, Young Link finds that he may have drunk too much milk.
Notice: This is the second arc of my Super Smash Brothers: Bedwetters Cabin series. I made this chapter a separate story because it stars different characters and focuses on different themes. The concept is pretty evident but if you're interested in reading more check the description for links.
Author's note: So I actually commissioned art on this story but fanfiction dot net isn't the best place to view it. Look me or the artist (MaxieKun) up on deviant art if you want to see a great picture to go along with this.
o-o-o
The two small Links stood at their respective starting positions on Spirit Tracks, patiently waiting for the announcer to call start. Toon Link was standing on the engineer's cabin and examining his new purple tunic. He liked his green one more but he was asked to change so spectators wouldn't get him and his opponent confused.
His opponent, Young Link, was on the last platform. He was still dressed in his classic green tunic and he was fuming. Years of pent up anger were oozing just below his surface. 'I'll show that little punk for replacing me,' he thought to himself. He'd been looking forward to his revenge ever since he'd found out that both of them were scheduled to compete in Super Smash Brothers: Ultimate.
Toon Link wasn't oblivious to the fact Young Link didn't much care for him, but he was still certain Young Link was just a friend he hadn't made yet. The way he figured it, they'd be natural friends, if not brothers. While they waited to start, he decided to strike up conversation.
"What'a you think is the hold up?" he asked.
"How should I know," Young Link spat back at him, not hiding his contempt.
Toon Link sighed as Young Link pulled out a jar of milk and started drinking from it. Toon Link decided to try again.
"Hey, I'm getting a little thirsty too. Can you toss that my way?" he asked.
Young Link stopped drinking for a moment to look at Toon Link. A grin crossed his face and Young Link proceeded to gulp down the entire bottle.
"Hmph," Toon Link sulked, crossing his arms in frustration.
After Young Link finished, he put the bottle away. "Hey," he said, putting on a gentler tone. "You know it's a magic bottle and it refills the milk automatically?" he asked, pulling out another full bottle of milk. Toon Link smiled and held up one hand, ready to catch the bottle. Instead, Young Link took great joy as he placed the bottle to his lips and quickly finished the whole thing. He wiped his lips and smiled deviously at Toon Link, who glared at him with an exasperated annoyance.
Young Link smugly went over his strategy in his mind, then he confidently imagined what his winning pose would be, then he couldn't help but imagine the look on Orange's (Inkling Girl's) face when she saw him victorious. He swooned as he thought 'I wonder what she's doing right now?"
o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o
Meanwhile at Smash Manor things were running far from smoothly. The halls of the building were packed with Nintendo workers trying to wrangle up the various fighters and make sure they were where they needed to be to start each fight. Between the characters who didn't read and the characters who didn't care, it wasn't quite the automated system they'd hoped to eventually achieve. It was often necessary to bring in more cooperative and experienced fighters to drag newer fighters into the arena to join the brawl.
In the spectators room, Blue (Inkling Boy) was hitting the top of a CRT television while Orange furiously flipped through channels.
"Why in the world are we watching it on these pre-Mollusc pieces of junk, anyway?" Blue asked, angrily.
"I don't know, but the match was supposed to start 20 minutes ago!" Orange said, tapping the channel forward button as fast as her little fingers could possibly move. "We probably missed Young Link beating the snot out of Toon!"
"Not a chance! Young is probably burnt rubble on the ground by now!" Blue shot back. They each liked the Link they were rooting for, sure. But more importantly, they had money on this fight.
"May I try?" asked a feminine voice from beside Orange. They looked up to see Zelda.
"Sure, but I'm pretty sure it's broke," Orange said while handing her the remote.
At a single pressing of a button, Zelda turned on the correct channel to see the fighters still staring each other down.
"Woomy…" Orange said, staring at Zelda with astonishment. The three took their seats.
"See how pumped Young Link is, he can barely contain himself!" Orange said to Blue, watching as the green tunic'd boy hopped from one foot to the other.
"That's not his usual battle stance, he looks troubled…" Zelda commented.
o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o
'Damnit!' Young Link thought to himself, fidgeting all around but unable to move from the starting position. 'If I'd known we wouldn't start for another 15 minutes I wouldn't have had all that milk!' Young Link, knowing that if he were to win he'd have to use his superior speed, skipped breakfast that morning to keep himself light. Thus, the two bottles of milk he'd drank went right through him and swelled up his bladder. He tried to distract himself from the urge by thinking of his battle plan and watching the scenery pass around him but the pressure kept building and consuming his mind.
Just as he was considering lifting up his tunic and peeing off the side of the train, he heard the tone signaling the match was about to begin.
3...2...1...Go!
The adrenaline from the announcer's booming voice temporarily chased his troubled bladder straight out of his mind. He went into fight mode and knew he shouldn't try and go to Toon Link, after all Toon Link had the higher ground. Instead Young Link pulled out his bomb and readied his boomerang. As if on queue, Toon Link jumped onto the ground level with a bomb of his own.
Young Link froze for a second when he first saw Toon Link. This dweebish kid that always seemed so joyful now had a look of determination, a fierce rage. He threw his bomb and boomerang but, before he knew it, Toon Link was in his face and swinging his sword straight down at him.
Young Link barely got his shield up in time and the wooden protection smashed to pieces under the enormous power of the blow. He jumped forward over Toon Link and onto the top platform. 'Damn, I can't underestimate him again," he thought as he tossed the broken Deku Shield aside and readied another bomb.
Toon Link jumped up toward him and Young Link threw. Toon Link successfully dodged only to find himself confronted by the force of Young Link's sword.
"Too fast!" Toon Link said to himself as the blade knocked him backwards onto the ground level. Before he could even stand back up he found himself eating a fire arrow, knocking him back prone. As he tried to stand again he saw Young Link above him, his sword pointing straight down toward Toon Link as he put all his weight into the blow. It smashed against Toon Link and rebounded him off the stage and into the air, out of bounce.
o-o-o-o-o-o-o
"Woomy!" Orange cried out, pumping her fist and playfully pushing Blue.
"Come on Toon, get your head in the game!" Blue shouted at the TV.
Just then Lucas appeared and pulled up a chair. "Hey guys," he said.
"Hey Lucas, how was your match with King K. Rool?" Blue asked.
Lucas thought back to the match and the giant crocodile who seemed to toy with him by repeatedly either burying him in the ground or sucking him into his gun. Lucas shuddered. "Really close," he lied. "How's Toon Link?"
"He can't match Young Link's speed," Zelda said. "Toon Link can take more of a beating, though. He just needs to wear Young Link out."
o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o
Toon Link had figured this out already and was well in the middle of enacting his strategy. Shoot, jump, throw, jump, throw, jump, shoot, jump, etc. to constantly keep Young Link moving and maybe even widdle up his damage.
It worked somewhat as intended but, more than anything, the monotony was getting to Young Link and he was starting to remember his extreme need for a restroom. "Bastard, stop running!" he yelled, jumping up and gently striking Toon Link with his sword.
Toon Link shrugged it off and dodged backwards, letting the bomb he'd thrown earlier come down and nearly explode on Young Link, who barely dodged himself. Toon Link was getting frustrated, for every tap he got on Young Link he'd get hit 3 or 4 times. The bombs, cuts, and flaming arrows tattered his once "girly" looking purple tunic. He knew a single heavy smash attack would take another stock and leaving him with only one, so he did his best to keep running around the stage.
Young Link, too, realized how on the ropes Toon Link was. He needed Toon Link to get foolish but he was playing too smart for that. Luckily, Young Link had prepared a secret weapon just for this occasion, a little tip straight from Dark Pit.
"Hey Toon," he shouted out, jumping backwards and putting plenty of space between them. "Why don't you use fire arrows like me?" Toon Link didn't stop to listen but he kept throwing projectiles, forcing Young Link to keep dodging.
Young Link continued, "Did your grandma tell you that if you play with fire you'll wet the bed? 'Cuss not playing with fire doesn't seem to be working!"
Toon Link paused and his face became red. "I don't wet the bed!" he yelled indignantly at Young Link.
"Then why are you roomed up with the other bedwetters and pissy-pants?" he yelled back, mockingly.
"Don't you dare talk about my friends that way!" Toon Link shouted, running forward and jumping toward Young Link, readying his sword for an aerial attack.
Unfortunately, Young Link had predicted this and jumped to meet him, kicking with all his might before Toon Link could finish his swing. Toon Link went flying over the engineer's cabin and onto the tracks, where the train hit him and sent him rocketing out of bounds. Young Link laughed heartily to himself but felt a small spurt of urine try to force itself out of him. He shot one hand to his crotch and gritted his teeth, recovering his continence by the time Toon Link re entered the stage.
o-o-o-o-o-o
"Patience, Toon," Zelda said, biting her lip. She knew one of them had to lose but she didn't want either of them to be 3-stocked.
"What did he say? Why can't we hear them?" Blue asked from the edge of his seat.
"Nintendo wants them to be silent heroes. They can talk but Nintendo wont broadcast anything they say," Zelda explained as the fight on the tiny CRT continued.
Orange, who had been closely watching Young Link, asked, "Why does Young Link keep grabbing himself like that?"
"I'm not sure…" Zelda said.
"I think...maybe...it looks like he needs to pee?" Lucas posited. The other 3 looked at him for a second, then back at Young Link. The realization of what was happening sunk into the 3 of them seemingly at the same time.
"Uh-oh," Orange said.
o-o-o-o-o-o
The battle raged on and Toon Link was still furious, albeit more calculating. On the other hand, Young Link's concentration was starting to slip as he focused more and more attention on his aching bladder. It was he who was running away now, needing just a second to regain his breath and composure.
Toon Link didn't waste his opportunity after seeing the worried look on Young Link's face. He chased Young Link to the side of the stage and jumped toward him. Young Link was ready for a head on aerial assault but was surprised when Toon Link double jumped and landed behind him. Young Link went to pivot but his quick movement sent a warm spurt of urine out of him and into his underpants, spreading around his crotch. "Crap!" he said, using one hand to stop the flow. Before he could regain his bearings, Toon Link had already shot his chain out to grab him. With a quick judo flip, Young Link was sent flying backwards and out of bounds.
The revival platform caught him before he hit the ground. He got onto his feet as it carried him back to the stage. He was shaking at this point, he was sure this was the most he'd ever had to pee in his life. He spent most of his time in the wilderness or on the plains, he wasn't used to having to hold his bladder for this long. He desperately longed to finish this fight quickly and get back to the locker room, where a toilet awaited him. The thought of peeing forced another small spurt out of him. He felt a trickle go partially down his thigh, then the platform gave way and he found himself in the battle again.
He'd really wanted to 3-stock this kid but now 2-stocking him would have to do. Still, the most he could manage at this point was running and spamming projectiles. He was worried a strong hit to his gut would almost assuredly force the contents of his bladder into his underpants. For the most part, this strategy seemed to work. He hit Toon Link with several bombs and arrows as the two danced around the stage. He remained mostly untouched, save from the occasional non-flaming arrow.
Eventually he saw his bombs and boomerangs pushing Toon Link back more and more. He didn't want to go head-on until he was sure he could get a kill but he knew now was his time.
Young Link dropped to the bottom platform, where Toon Link was crouched over and barely able to hold his sword. Excitement swelled in him at the thought of finally teaching this young punk his lesson. But at that moment, his body decided it had other priorities. He needed to pee right this instant.
He stopped walking toward Toon Link and grabbed his crotch with all his might. He winced in pain, a desperate pain he had never experienced before in all his battles. Toon Link, despite his beat-up state, finally realized what was troubling his opponent. A huge, mischievous grin spread across his face.
"What the matter, Young" he asked, his voice full of mockery. "A little too much milk for you?"
"I'll kill you!" Young Link growled through grit teeth as he took a step forward. He stopped when a stream of urine started to escape him and trickle down his naked leg. He put all his muscle into regaining control and, just when he did, his muscle gave out and the stream continued from where it left off. He attempted this maneuver several more times, each time sending bigger and longer spurts of urine into his underwear and down his thigh, where it made its way into his high-boots.
As he was struggling to regain his bladder control, Toon Link seized the opportunity. He charged forward. "This one's for all of us bedwetters and pissy-pants!" Toon Link shouted. Young Link looked up just in time to see Toon Link's fierce eyes as he smashed him once with his sword, then again, sending him flying into the air. Before Young Link could recover, he felt a bomb hit him against the back, then a sword hit his face, then again a bomb pushed him further into the air. The force of the combo of blows opened the tap on his bladder and he began peeing himself uncontrollably, the urine spreading every which way onto his tunic as he went tumbling through the air.
Eventually Toon Link couldn't catch him and he landed on top of the engineer's cabin, face down. He laid there in pain for a moment before he realized a warm, wet sensation was spreading across his stomach. "No, stop!" he yelled at his body, trying in vain to squeeze the muscles that would constrict his bladder. He wasn't able to find them so he jumped to his feet and looked down at his tunic. The giant, dark green wet spot had completely enveloped the cloth around his thighs and reached up past his belly button. He let out a pathetic little groan as he felt the last bit of pee trickle out of his body and stream down his naked leg.
The relief didn't last long, however. He looked up to see Toon Link smashing him in the face with a forward aerial, sending him flying out of bounds and taking a stock.
o-o-o-o-o-o-o
Zelda and Blue covered their mouths with their hand as they watched this all go down. Lucas seemed fascinated at the turn of events and Orange facepalmed.
"Can't any of my male friends hold their pee…" she mumbled quietly to herself.
"What was that?" Blue asked, paying close attention to the fighting that had now resumed.
"Nothing," Orange quickly responded, then looked up to watch the fight. Young Link had respawned and was as fierce as ever in his combat. His appearance, however, was beyond pitiful. His urine drenched tunic stuck to his young body and occasionally drops of pee dripped off of him and onto the train car.
"Hey, is this where the little Links are fighting?" someone asked from behind them. The three children froze up when they recognized the voice; there was no mistaking that this was Dark Pit. Zelda, though, acted quickly. She rose up from her chair and got in front of the CRT screen, facing Dark Pit to block his view.
"Oh, hello Dark Pit. Palutena said you had an important match today, how was it?" she asked.
Dark Pit looked at her, confused for a second, then answered, "It was fine, just a quick round against Little Mac. No problem for an angel like me."
He shifted sideways to see around Zelda as Blue got up from his chair, too, and blocked the TV. "You? Win against Little Mac? No chance!" he said, coming to the aid of Young Link naturally because of what had happened to himself the day before.
"What do you mean no chance? Just throw him off stage and he's screwed, he can barely jump," Dark Pit responded, now sounding a bit annoyed.
He leaned over a bit more to see around Blue when Orange stood up, joining in on the plan to help her new friend. "But he has so much defense and power, while you have…"
This seemed to get to Dark Pit. "Okay fine! It wasn't an easy win but winning is winning. Now move over, I gave Young Link a powerful tip and I want to see if he used it."
He walked forward and pushed Blue aside, only for Lucas to jump up on a chair to be face to face with Dark Pit. "B-but…" he started, his nerves causing him to stutter over his words. He lost eye contact with Dark Pit and his gaze fell down to Blue, who was urging him on with a circular wave of his hand. Lucas regained his confidence. "But what if I went and asked Little Mac how the match went?"
Dark Pit gave a quiet, defiant growl. "Fine!" he said, folding his arms and looking away in shame. "He beat me with two stocks to spare! Are you satisfied now?"
From behind them they heard a mighty crash come from the CRT speakers, then a victory song. They turned around as the announcer proclaimed "Young Link, wins!" On the TV, Young Link stood modestly with his back facing the camera. They noticed a small wet spot on his butt and they glanced at Dark Pit, who seemed not to notice. At the bottom of the screen a bruised and tattered Toon Link clapped enthusiastically.
"Great, you guys made me miss watching Young Link beat the crap out of that snot nosed punk!" Dark Pit complained. "Whatever, I'll ask him how it went later," he said as he turned away and stormed off. The group let out a collective sigh once he was out of earshot.
"Not a word," Zelda said to the children, putting on a tone of authority. "These things happen, remember when…" she started, trailing off as she realized the last two kids who wet their pants during the competition were right in front of her. Lucas and Blue looked away awkwardly and Zelda cleared her throat. "Not a word," she emphasized.
An awkward silence enveloped the small group for a second until Orange gave a small cough from beside Blue and stuck out her hand. Blue grumbled and dug into his pocket, pulling out 5 coins and giving them to her.
o-o-o-o-o-o
In the locker room, Young Link sulked on a bench as Toon Link excitedly rambled on about the match. The fierce, angry warrior on the field reverted back to his carefree nature when he didn't have to fight. Young Link wanted nothing to do with him, though. His wet tunic had gotten cold and it left a very unpleasant feeling on his stomach. His thighs, too, were starting to chafe and he had just realized how badly he reeked of urine. The taste of victory he'd been so looking forward to was bitter under these conditions.
Toon Link opened his locker and pulled out his own green tunic, which he'd had to change out of at the request of the commissioner. He started to undo his belt so he could get out of his purple tunic when a thought occurred to him. "Y'know," he said, speaking into the air and away from Young Link, "I think purple kind of makes me look smart. I might just wear it the rest of the day."
"Hmph," Young Link said from the bench. He came from his cabin wearing his fighting uniform, he had no spare clothes to choose from.
Toon Link continued with his thought, "But I don't want to have to go all the way back to my cabin just to put up my shirt. Do you think if I leave it here they'll bring it back for me?"
"How should I know?" Young Link spat out again. He then realized, Toon Link hadn't looked at him at all since the match ended. In fact, when he was recounting the details he didn't even mention Young Link's accident. Young Link saw the life vest Toon Link was throwing to him and he jumped into it, "Actually, yeah. Someone will probably bring them back to you," he added hastily.
"Think so? Cool!" Toon Link said, leaving his locker open with his spare tunic inside. "I'm gonna go watch the fights, then. I'll see you out there!"
Toon Link started walking off and Young Link jumped off the bench and started undoing his belt. He paused and called out to Toon Link, "Hey, listen!" Toon Link stopped but didn't turn around.
"Thanks," Young Link said. "For the great match, that is. We'll have to fight again some time, it was fun."
"Careful what you wish for, next time I'll be ready for you!" Toon Link belted with a laugh as he exited the locker room. As soon as the door slammed shut Young Link wasted no time in ripping off his wet tunic and sliding off his soaking wet underwear. He jumped in the shower and thoroughly scrubbed himself clean.
o-o-o-o-o-o
A bit later, Orange was making her way to her own match when she ran into Young Link in the hall heading toward his cabin. Young Link was carrying his wet clothes in a brown paper bag and trying to sneak by without being detected but, when he saw Orange, he knew he was screwed. To make matters worse, Toon Link's bright green tunic that he was wearing was just slightly too small on his body. He felt ridiculous enough at that, but it was compounded by the fact he that wasn't wearing any underwear and one false move would mean accidentally exposing himself to Orange.
"Hey Link!" Orange said, slapping him on the back.
"Hey Orange…" Young Link responded, unable to make eye contact. He wanted to clear the air immediately so he asked, "I take if you saw the match…?"
"Nope, me and Blue could never get the damned TV to work," she lied, having already rehearsed the alibi with Blue. "Did you crush him?"
Young Link's heart fluttered and he felt like he could jump for joy (though he didn't because that would definitely expose his privates) He was about to gloat over his win but he decided modesty might be a better approach. "I won, but just barely. I can almost see why they chose him over me for the last two games," he answered.
Orange smiled. "Well congrats but I've gotta go get ready for my match," she said, continuing on her way. Young Link let out of a sigh of relief, thinking he got away with it, but then Orange called out over her shoulder, "By the way, that tunic looks good on you."
'Damn, she noticed!' Young Link thought to himself. He'd rack his mind for days trying to figure out what she meant by telling him that, but he never asked. The reality was that Orange could never resist a good teasing.