Hello Readers:
I am True-InTha-Blue
For those who know me,
Why am I not updating FOSTA: Unova?
I am still struggling to write for it and I while I wish to go back to it, I am not going to push myself.
So... My other favorite series that I really really have always wanted to write for, is Kingdom Hearts. I've seen a few of these but never really felt natural.
So after the release of KH3 and playing (and completing) the game, I thought it would be the perfect time to finally start this series.
I have had a lot of KH ideas in the past.
But I think this is a plot sorely needed in the fanfiction premise.
This is NOT a Sora OP fic.
I want to present new challenges and more emotional turmoil.
I still want to keep the charm of KH and hope I can do as service.
Vanitas is a fascinating character. Very unlike other villains in his backstory and motivations. The very nature of him leaves many
'What ifs?' and I like that potential.
I also really like Sora.
And Kairi
And I want to expand on that.
And I desire to make the adventures in the various of Disney worlds, more expansive and more.. actual worlds.
So I hope you enjoy this
This will contain spoilers for Kingdom Hearts: Birth By Sleep, and we'll work our way up.
Disclaimer: Square Enix Characters belong to Square Enix. And Disney Characters belong to Disney.
Nothing belongs to me.
A Fragment of a Fragment
Chapter 1
He was a fading existence.
A fragment of a fragment does not really exist, does it?
After everything. All that pain, suffering... Isolation... Rejection... Sadness.
All for nothing.
A half-complete existence that even the original didn't want. An incomplete heart.
An unaccomplished life.
What a joke.
All his hopes, dreams (if he even had those) and purpose, poured into that X-blade... and even that... didn't want him.
It failed.
Looks like he was a puppet after all
The old man... Said he could finally become whole by forming it... by fusing with his half. But that didn't work.
He couldn't get his Light... no matter how hard he tried.
He was played. Played to the whims of the old fool.
He was the fool.
Who would want him anyway?
A dark existence who can produce no light of his own.
He was fading...
...
Why?
Why could he not be accepted?
Why could he not find his Light?
Why could he not have a whole Heart?
He hoped... that She would make sure the old fool failed.
After all...
He thought to become one with her first...
He if did... things... would... have... been...
...
X
So long.
What was time?
What was what?
These thoughts were not... there...
What was thinking?
Broken...
Fragment...
Damaged...
Pain... and sadness were familiar.
"Oh! You're here too?"
Here?
Where?
...
Who?
"You're smaller than the other one? Do... Do you need healing too?"
Healing?...
"...l-light... I just... want... a heart."
A heart of darkness doesn't really make an actual heart.
"You... don't have a heart? Why?"
"B..b-bro-...ken..."
Why was this... talking to him?
No... one... wanted...
"You sound even sadder than him... Maybe... I can help you too!" This person sounded so hopeful.
So pure.
Maybe he would laugh at it... if he remembered how to laugh.
"H-help...?"
"Yeah! Maybe I can help you find your heart! You can stay here until we do."
"..."
What was this?
This feeling?
He was so tired.
So tired of being in pain.
So tired of being sad.
So tired of being alone.
"...Okay."
For the first time in his existence... Vanitas felt warmth.
Warm.
So warm.
Not burning or scorching or pain.
Just warmth.
It was so nice.
This was light.
So much light.
The sound of waves gently greeted his ears. The smell of salt and flora lulled his eyes to open.
The sky was so bright.
The Sun's rays reached to every corner.
He felt his limbs...
Limbs?
He had a form.
He got up, looked at him. Skin covered with a black and red organic material, a second skin almost. He felt metal around his jaw and something over his face but he could see clearly.
Who was he?
The figure got up. Wondering where he was.
Everything felt so good here. The air was nice and clean, the sound of waves was calming, soothing.
'I feel like I never had this before.'
The figure looked around, curious. A large sea spread before him with crystal blue waves and an equally expansive sky.
Sand was around his boots, nearly pale white. The wind rustled the bright green trees both palm and bushy. The land was shaped by haphazard wood structures and huts. Ladders were sporadically spread to reach higher platforms. A pool and waterfall sprang forth from the walls.
It was quaint, it was peaceful, it was soothing.
And the figure knew he had never felt anything like it.
He slowly wandered around, taking his time. He was the one solely there... but it always felt like someone was next to him... welcoming. Inviting him to partake.
The slow trail he made for his body felt like things were a dream, light as air, each breath taken with a refreshing briskness that eased his body. Even when he wandered into a shaded path, the coolness even more so felt safe and quiet. His body seemed to become more alive in this shade. A relaxation in his veins.
Then he noticed a small cave covered in moss. It was very dark... but he felt intrigued by it. He crawled in, the spindly path directed by the smooth rocky walls Yet even in this dark corridor with narrow paths and deep somber winds, did a faint light illuminate things clearly.
Almost a blue mist drifted low to the ground. Further in the figure walked, his curiosity growing. Until he walked into a large area with a single ray of light piercing through an opening from the ceiling rocks. The walls were sparsely decorated with nonsensical drawings that were undefined.
Most importantly, there was an opening, like an open doorway.
One into an abyss of darkness.
The figure felt no fear at this darkness.
After all he...
He...
...
'What?... I what... What is I?" Memories were unavailable, everything felt... blank... Except... Except.
Pain and Sadness.
He knew, that he had felt those before... that they were a part of him. So deeply intertwined into the makeup of his being.
But why?
That, the figure did not know.
But, what he did know, besides the pain and sadness, was that wherever he was, kept them at bay.
On the other hand... he wanted to figure out what this place was exactly...
And who he was.
Frustration... Another familiar emotion.
Without hesitation, he walked into the void.
And stepped into a realm with pillars of glass and the abyss filled with mist and fog, drifting between white and black and grey.
Bright blue stained glass with a rim of black crowns, the center held images of a raft, tribal mask, fishing spears, wrenches, mushrooms, a mobile with fish, stars and moon and in the center of this large platform, was a star-shaped fruit. Around was a scene depicting a familiar beach.
Simple desires.
Simple treasure.
All so pure in a young heart.
Yet the figure did not know of this.
However, the platform... rang a bell in his head.
He had been to a place like this before... More complicated.
More broken.
Why?
The frustration was growing and the dreaming haze of his mind was fading. If went further, if he went deeper... he would know.
He paused.
'Do... Do I want to know?'
A foreboding feeling was beginning to weld up and the warmth of the beach was already sorely missed.
For he knew it was not really his to have. His feet moved forward into a path that appeared in the fog, each a square of glass and color. Every step was a small chime and dulled in the abyss. Further and further he passed mirrors of scenes and moving images, surrounded by chains. Most blurred but each emitted light and that familiar warmth glowed whenever he passed them.
However, that frustration and want to know kept the figure from peering into them.
He trudged further, a platform depicting different tropical scenes, each with that stained glass motifs.
Until finally, finally further down where light dimmed, and the fog was thick, did the Figure felt drawn to a shining light in the center.
A light that felt different.
And upon reaching it, did it take shape...
Of him.
Ventus
And the first thing the figure felt. For sure, for real, and focused his mind:
Was Hatred.
"You." The figure spat at the sight of the peaceful sleeping form of his light half.
The memories were rushing back, all that pain and anger and sadness rushed in over and over and over.
The darkness that was himself.
The half-existence.
The unwanted fragment.
Empty creature of Ventus Riven...
Vanitas.
It all came rushing back. The fight with the X-Blade. Him... struggling to maintain his existence and Ventus just shattered both their hearts along with the blade.
Rejected!
Like everything else!
His so-called 'life'!
The endless cycle of pain that everyone including himself inflicted upon him!
The blasted Keyblade War.
The Old Fool's plans.
Those idiots!
Kingdom Hearts
Vanitas' helmet faded away revealing the hostile yellow eyes and black hair.
"Y-You! YOU!" His rage was so unfathomable that he could hardly speak. Instead, he slashed out his hand expecting Void Gear to appear.
It didn't.
"Huh?" Caught off guard, he stared at the empty hand. He tried again, and again... He could feel the connection to his keyblade... but it wasn't... coming...
He tried getting a blast of fire to throw into his idiot half's face.
Nothing came.
"C'MON!" The dark half snarled frustrated that he had access to nothing to inflict a fraction of the pain he himself suffered upon Ventus.
Too fed up, he rushed at the boy only to find his hands blocked by something very solid and very visible. Briefly, it illuminated as a sphere around Ventus, completely protecting the Wayward Wind wielder.
But still, Vanitas kept banging his fist against it. Over and over and over again.
And again.
And again.
Who knows how long he had been doing this? He kept at it until his fists throbbed in pain, and yet still he weakly beat against the wall while sliding towards his knees.
His grunts of frustration and rage turning into small whimpers of tears and desperation.
"WHY?!" Vanitas finally cried out. The first time, he cried out, all his bravado finally gone. There was no one else here... So why hide it?
"WHY CAN'T YOU ACCEPT ME?!" He glared angrily through the tears at the peaceful face of the light half.
"NOT EVEN WHEN I WAS A PART OF YOU FROM THE BEGINNING-! DID YOU EVER WANT ME!"
The truth, the full truth, and his feelings came bursting out after so many years of keeping them as controlled as possible. Only the Unversed being the only sign of his true emotions.
"I just wanted to be whole! I JUST WANTED TO HAVE SOMETHING!" He heaved, unused to feeling so desperate, so bare. It felt like the first time the Unversed showed up... when he discovered the full misery of his existence.
"You have no idea what it was like! YOU FORGOT! FORGOT ABOUT ALL THAT PAIN! I remember! I remember! All your sadness! All your agony! EVERYTHING YOU DISLIKED! I GOT IT!... Everything."
From even beyond Master Xehanort...That horror of watching everything fade. The prior 'teachings' of the old fool inflicted upon Ventus, Vanitas remembered and felt it all and more.
All bad things Ventus felt in his new life, Vanitas felt it... and had nothing to counter it.
"I just wanted Light... I just wanted to know..." He felt his chest, unsure if there was actually a heart there or not... maybe just a void.
"Even just being a small thing of darkness... in your heart... I was happy... I could still at least be near light..." he snarled again. "But no... I couldn't even have that... I didn't want to be created! I DON'T WANT TO LIVE!"
His head fell on the wall with a loud 'thunk', his eyes blurry from all those chaotic emotions he hated so much about himself.
"The X-blade... was my only hope... There was no way... No other way." His words died out, nothing greeted him in this place. Especially, not Ventus.
"I hate you," Vanitas said quietly. "So much... You had... everything. You were happy. You were joyful... You had a life...You were able to forget. I had none of that." The old fool made sure of it. "You're an idiot. A dumb willing pawn of others!" Vanitas was unsure if he was addressing Ventus... or himself. "And yet... Here you are... sleeping peacefully like you always do! While I am still alone! Alone with... nothing!"
Nothing... His own name reflected that.
He had nothing.
He gained nothing.
He was nothing.
"Why...?" At this point, Vanitas didn't even know what he was asking. "Why am I still here?..." He glared once again at the sleeping teenager. Like it was his fault. "Why are we both still here? You shattered our hearts!" No response.
Sighing he slowly got up. Somehow. Knowing he didn't have an actual body, his formed felt so weary. So tired. He stared at Ventus for a long time.
And nothing changed.
"Somehow... you and I both exist... bet you didn't see that coming..." Vanitas muttered darkly. The platform of glass they were on was nearly blank, only the faintest of colors and outlines could possibly be detected and even then there was no discernible shape. The pillar itself seemed faded in comparison to the previous ones.
"Once again you're the lucky one. Sleeping... like you always seem to. I couldn't even close my eyes most days... I am awake..."
Why was he the one awake?
Why couldn't he finally dream?
What was it like?
He looked around, seeing the illuminant stained glass of other platforms far away and higher above in the fog, shining dimly.
Vanitas needed to know.
"You shattered us... and... I was desperate to keep it together..." Vanitas remembered his pathetic flailing towards the X-blade. His last hope. "I faded... and then..." He couldn't remember, except- "-I was warm. I woke up on that beach."
Was that... Light? This feeling, this aching longing. It wasn't his... but it felt so nice to just... be in it.
Once again he wondered why Ventus or anyone else would not give it to him.
But that begs the question, what is this place?
"A heart." Vanitas suddenly muttered as the words came to him. Like old memories suddenly rising from depths though they were never apart of him in the first place. "A young boy's heart... HIs name is Sora."
So some random little kid was the one who finally gave him a taste of light? Vanitas laughed. Bitterly until he nearly became shaking shudders.
"Well! Isn't that just great?! After all of that! Finally!" His words echoed emptily. "A young dumb kid who not only accept you, a stranger... but me. ME! A being of pure darkness! What kind of idiot would-" He stopped abruptly, realizing that he could only exist because of this idiot kid.
A cry of rage erupted from Vanitas. "I DON'T WANT TO EXIST!" He looked around for something to destroy, for anything! To lash out! He was so used to it with the unversed spawning from his emotions that-
...
There was no Unversed.
No matter how much he felt, the torrent of emotions he just felt from rage, sadness, grief, hate, and envy, there came none.
None.
None of those painful reminders that he was a half-baked creation.
No Keyblade
No Magic
No Unversed
...
He was... powerless. He was... an ordinary... thing.
Vanitas became quiet.
Still.
Why?
Why him? Why Ventus?
Why this boy?
What made them so special?
He was so tired.
"I just... I just..want..."
He didn't know what he wanted anymore.
Everything that made him... HIM, Vanitas, was gone.
That, or nothing to accept him.
No one wanted him.
...
Yet here he was.
Awake, and alone in some idiot boy's heart.
It was probably a fluke.
Probably Ventus' fault.
Once again yellow eyes glared at the peaceful resting face.
Vanitas had no direction. No obstruction. No enemy (at least any he could actually touch). No mission.
No one.
Not even the Unversed.
And yet...
And yet, even in the depths of this heart... he didn't feel alone.
Why?
AND WHY WOULDN'T HE STOP ASKING WHY?
"Snap out of it Vanitas! You're trapped here! LIKE SOME RAT!" The figure snarled, his hands clenching empty air. He wanted to crush something... Or at least have the keyblade in his hand! SOMETHING!
...
He wasn't used to feeling so weak.
He had to be strong. He always had to be strong. Vanitas couldn't afford to be weak. Being defenseless.
That meant... that meant...
His... Memories... were not all together.
There were gaps...
A lot of gaps.
Specifics eluded him.
He remembered...
His... Hate. He remembered the hate.
Contempt for the vessel who walked blindly into darkness.
Envy and Disdain at his lighter half... his... WEAKER half.
And absolute loathing for that Old Goat.
The man who created him.
He remembered that.
No names or faces to apply to anyone other than Ventus.
But the dark half knew what was done to him by others!
All the suffering, all the misery.
Vanitas wanted... he wanted...
He couldn't think properly.
The fact he still existed. Maybe not a physical body but his... fragment of a fragment self... was still here.
Who was this boy?
That question was most prominent. Against his nature, Vanitas forced himself to relax.
He couldn't afford to be rash. Never! Not like Ventus... and the others...
Who were the others?
'Idiots!' Came his first thought about them.
He had the advantage of keeping his cool. That meant... less unversed. It meant, he still had things underneath his control... meant that old goat...
His mind went blank again.
All he knew was that his memories were painful. Nothing pleasant about them...
Nothing pleasant about him.
Back on topic.
He was in a heart. Of a young boy, who could... find the shattered hearts of himself and Ventus.
He cast one last glare at the lighter half. "Go ahead! Sleep while you can. I'll figure out a way to get you yet!" With that last threat, he turned back the way he came, in the crumbling paths that lead up to what could only be the foremost levels of the heart.
The dark half passed through the mirrors and chains, this time peering into one. It was a man giving the perspective of the mirror. Small hands from the mirror's perspective reached out to grasp the present. Voices could be heard.
"Here you go, son! Happy Birthday!"
"My own wooden sword? Thanks, dad!"
Vanitas averted his eyes. That empty feeling growing larger.
Typical. Trapped in a little boys heart filled to the brim with that childlike innocence and light.
Only the barest of tiniest of edges of darkness existed in here. Probably like Ventus. Dumb and naive.
Weak.
So why did his feet take him back to the area full to the brim of this light?
Why was he so desperate any slight sliver? Even if it wasn't his?
He reached that strange doorway that led into the misty cave. Past the scribbles and back through the tunnel and past the moss where he found himself in this little seaside beach. A place... so surreal to him. In truth the essence of this boy's heart.
Now it was too bright.
But still so good.
All the bad stuff, the hate and sadness, and grief, slowly dimmed. Still there, still very much a part of him.
Yet no longer as hurtful.
Vanitas spotted a shack not too far away from him and decided he would go there.
He always worked best hidden.
Although it was dark inside, perfect for someone like him, Vanitas didn't realize he left the door slightly cracked, so that a single ray graced the shade. Finally, he slid down the wall, feeling exhausted from earlier and frustrated at the lack of what he could do.
Sleep beckoned him. And this time...
This time he was not afraid to close his eyes.
End of Chapter 1
Enjoy.